A/N: I do not own Death Note.
1. Knowledge
Misa knew that Light would never love her.
She knew, and yet she pretended to keep up hope. She showered him – her knight in shining armor – with adoration, acting like she didn't notice his indifference towards her.
After all, she knew that their "relationship" had never been normal. No normal boyfriend changed from lethal to loving in the blink of an eye. It was all a game to him… no, perhaps that wasn't quite right. She felt more like… someone for Light to practice his acting skills on, to ascertain his perfection in the delicate art of deception.
Even now – when they were engaged, for goodness' sake – he never so much as glanced her way, even when she put extra effort into her appearance. There was little tenderness, and certainly no real alone time. She pouted and cooed and played the part of a perfectly adorable, if somewhat childish, partner.
What Light seemed to forget was that Misa, no matter how much he underestimated her, was still an actress. She knew perfectly well what a lie was, how it was executed – perhaps better than most. So she understood that Light rarely spoke the truth, his lies somehow more glaringly obvious than the endless swarm of names, names, names floating around.
But it was the names he cared about, if anything, so she took excellent care of her eyes. Sunglasses, eyedrops, only reading in direct light – anything to keep those ("beautiful", many said. Never Light, though) blue eyes in immaculate condition. She knew that without her special sight, she was nothing to him. Nothing.
She knew that she had everything going for her. She was famous, gorgeous, and talented.
But in the end, she was just a human being.
Light was a god.
And she knew that a god would never love a human.