Chapter 9 Agent of Chaos Part 3

Underneath the mask Bruce Wayne, a.k.a. Batman, looked torn as Nightwing took off into the darkness of the night.

"You can't order him to do what you want anymore," a familiar female voice said, as Catwoman joined the Dark Knight. "And sooner or later, the time comes when the student has to go his own way from the master. Including the woman he falls for."

Batman didn't even look at her. "He's making a mistake."

"Is he?" Catwoman sidled up to Bruce like a human feline. "Well, that's a matter of opinion. Matters of the heart often are. I mean, just how much do you think your protégé approves of me? Of US?"

"There is no 'us', Selina," Batman said in a cold voice, despite how close the woman was standing to him.

"Oh come on, Bruce. You and I both know that if I were anyone else, you'd have sent me to jail ages ago. Well, Arkham anyway. They REALLY ought to close that place down, if you ask me – just how often do people escape from there, do you think?"

"Too often," Batman replied, even as he turned and swept off into the night.

Catwoman considered following him, but then she thought better of it; it would be far more fitting for Bruce to find her waiting for him in his bed, without a stitch of clothing on. Well, after she helped herself to some of the treasures at the Wayne manor which Selina knew he kept there, solely for her to steal them.

In any case, Scarecrow ran into me - the Joker, at your service - after spraying Nightwing with the fear toxin, putting the masked crime-fighter down for the count.

"Great, I just happen to bump into the Scarecrow," I said to myself. The guy then sprayed the fear toxin at my face, as a couple of goons tried to grab me.

I was not exactly happy about that, even if it didn't affect me. So I killed the henchmen before I took out my punching glove gun, and then I fired it and knocked out the Scarecrow. I don't know how I restrained myself from gutting him then and there, but I took him to the hideout.

Little did I know that right at that moment, Two-Face and Shego were talking back in Arkham. "It's a shame the plans didn't go so well," Shego said to her employer.

"Don't worry, Shego. I'm officially serving notice to you that these walls will not hold me – hold US – for long!" Two-Face replied.

I guess the drama queen thing is still a work in progress for him. Still, that was none of my business at the time. I was busy chaining the Scarecrow to a wall.

I removed the sack off his head. "Wake up, Dr. Crane!"

Hmm, he's not paying any attention to me. Still, hitting his leg with an iron pipe ought to fix that. SLAM!

Ah, don't you love the sound of bones breaking in the morning?

He screamed, of course. "AAAAHHH!"

"You think attempting to use those two goons to kidnap me was a good idea? Well, the joke is on you my friend." I grinned insanely at him. "Do my scars scare you? Hmmm...I can guess what you're thinking. But Batman is not going to show up and save you. Sad fact is, no one is. AHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!"

Crane let out his own dark and evil laugh, despite the pain. Okay, time to up the ante a bit.

"Want to know how I got my scars? I cut myself shaving with a knife." I pulled his head back, but that was no fun. It's like talking to myself, in a way – he's just as crazy as I am.

"Foolish clown. Let me go!"

"Let you go? What kind of villain would I be if I did that? Not a very good one." So then finally, I get around to breaking his other leg. Then I tossed the iron pipe to the ground, on account of this was getting boring. "Why so serious?"

Finally, FINALLY I see fear in good old Dr. Crane's eyes.

"Let's put a smile on that face, huh?" I started to cut Dr. Crane's mouth. Then I cut the other side of his mouth. Smiling the whole time while cutting his face. Now that's a smile.

What the hell. Time to test out the playing cards. So I threw my razor sharp cards at him! WHOOSH! The cards sliced him throughout his flesh, making him bleed to death!

That'll teach the good doctor whether it's better to burn out, rather than fade away...

So then I cleaned myself up and decided to hit the hay. Big mistake, because elsewhere Harley was going up against KP in a grudge match she couldn't win. And if you think I should have kept a better eye on her, what is Harley? My puppy?

The way I heard it later, Kim dodged Harley's giant hammer after she went on the offensive. She kicked Harley's leg hard, and good old Tara fell down to the ground. The giant hammer landed on the ground too.

"Kim, you ruined our plans to get rid of you!" BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!

Damn it, Harley, I could have told you that a gun wouldn't work. Kim just jumped out of the way of the bullets.

FWAK! Kim high-kicked Harley in the head. She was knocked out cold, and helpless on the ground.

"Who is she?" Kim said to herself. It didn't occur to her to take off the mask and makeup. Well, anyway, the cops finally showed up, handcuffed Harley and then took her away to Arkham.

Kim smiled at seeing the Joker's girlfriend taken away. "Good riddance. Let her rot behind bars for robbing a bank and working with Joker, Two-Face and Shego!"

"I'm sorry, Mistah J!" cried Harley, as they took her away. Well, too bad. I was smart enough to avoid Kim, even if she wasn't.

After I woke up at the hideout I said to myself, "What to do with the Scarecrow's body...hmm...burn it, bury it or throw it over a bridge. Right, the bridge it is then."

I turned to my two henchmen. "You two, get rid of the Scarecrow."

"Okay, boss," said the one of the henchmen.

I didn't bother looking as my minions unchained Dr. Crane off the wall, tossed him into the trunk and then slam it closed. I just said, "Make sure no one sees you dump the body, got it?"

"Yeah, sure, dude," said the younger one of the two henchmen. Okay, his life expectancy just went straight into the toilet.

I grinned as they drove off in the stolen car. That's when I learned what had happened to Harley.

Good help is so hard to come by.

Later I heard my boys had made sure Dr. Crane's body was never found. So I killed the younger one and the other guy, well, did I happen to mention I met a nice lady called Pam recently? She calls herself Poison Ivy, though.

Still, I had other things to do – like attend the funeral of KP's parents with a set of binoculars, from around 500 feet away.

I saw Kim, Tim and Jim meet a friend of their parents. Bruce Wayne. The way I heard it, Bruce told them that they could live with him if they wanted. Millionaire playboy that he was, the twins were more than happy to do that. I bet those guys were figuring on getting lucky with the scraps from that rich dude's table.

Oddly enough, Kim decided she wanted in as well. Later on, Batgirl showed up roughly around the time when Robin joined the Teen Titans. I was a freaking imbecile not to put it all together, right from the start – I mean, who else could Batgirl have been if not good old KP?

I got so mad, I decided to go visit an old...friend.

There was a knock at the cabin door. Gil opened up to see me standing there.

This was going to be fun...

To Be Continued