Appeal of the Forbidden

By: Lucas McDrake

Chapter 15-Dance

~Keiran~

The melody started out slowly, as if coming out from the fragrance of all the white flora, single notes that reverberated across the room. Gradually, the three identical melodies of the canon began their dance across the audience. Occasionally, a melody would fasten their waltz, followed quickly by the other two. For a second, the first tune would seem to weep, but it would quickly lighten again, elating all of those listening as well.

Leaning back into the white cushions of the chair, I waved one of my fingers to the rhythm of "Pachelbel's Canon", the song Rosalie was playing on the grand piano. The lilting notes washed over me, making me forget, for a moment...

My eyebrows scrunched, and I pinched myself on my leg through my dress with the same finger I'd been keeping rhythm with - but that only made it worse. Emmett was still at the forefront of my mind. It had been three months, and I still couldn't completely get that corrupting dream out of my head. The dream that had ruined everything.

Imperceptibly shaking my head, I tuned back into the song Rosalie was playing with her gliding fingers across the piano keys, but by now she had gracefully slid into the wedding march, adding her own embellishments. Bella would be coming down the stairs soon.

Over the past few months, I'd gotten to know Bella much better. I could see why Edward was so desperately in love; Bella was probably the kindest soul I'd ever met myself. She was also probably the last to let the subject of mine and Emmett's alienation drop. But, eventually, everyone had, seeing it was inevitable.

Keiran, why does your mind constantly come back to Emmett? I asked myself. Looking downward at my simple white dress, my long, dirty blond hair trailing down it, my hand tightened into a fist, shaking a little in anger. Emmett this, Emmett that - can't you just shut up about Emmett, for once?

At that moment, I heard Bella and Charlie's footsteps down the stairs. All of the hushed whispering came to an abrupt halt as everyone turned to observe Bella, making her careful way down the stairs. I smiled a bit as I thought about how treacherous a position she was in, at the top of a staircase with only silky white high heels between her feet and each stair.

Alice, a little farther down the staircase than Bella, was absolutely stunning in her bridesmaid dress that resembled a silvery waterfall, though it was only too obvious how much effort she put into making Bella the center masterpiece of the show today. Bella's hair, piled on top of her head in an impossibly elegant manner with a sapphire-embedded comb set within, shined like newly shaped chocolate, and her dress was a milky masterpiece of grace and beauty, patterns trilling simply across it, embellished by lace. Her bouquet of flowers consisted of fresh roses, white and blue, matching the men's blue roses set in their tuxedo pockets. It was hard not to compare Alice's grace to Bella's hurried march, but I had to admit that Bella seemed to have gained a pair of dancer's feet today for the express purpose of the wedding.

I noticed that Charlie, behind his nonchalant small smile, seemed to be caught between pure joy and utter panic. Extremely nervous. It was obvious that he was caught between millions of emotions - too caught up to say any quiet words to his daughter, like they always did in the movies. Despite sweating bullets, he did look quite ravishing in his simple tuxedo, with a blue rose sticking out of his pocket. Determined, Bella and Charlie marched up the short aisle, but Bella seemed to be suddenly quite impatient to get to the altar.

Curious, I turned my gaze to Edward. As I was sitting in the back, I could see that I was the only one looking forward towards the groom. A line from a chick-flick I'd watched recently came to mind - something about how it's funny to look at the groom, while everyone else isn't, and see his stupid expression. My smile widened slightly at remembering this, and grew even wider when I saw Edward. His adoration was unmistakable, and his smile was so contagious that I couldn't help feeling hope welling within me.

Shortly thereafter, Bella reached the altar, and Charlie handed her hand to Edward in the timeless symbol of acceptance. The minister read their vows, and after their heart-filled "I do"s, they shared a brief kiss. At least, it seemed brief to me; Emmett, seeming impatient, coughed loudly to remind them they were in a public gathering, and Edward, smiling a little at Emmett's action, ended their kiss. And, of course, I was reminded of Emmett once again.

Trying to recall my feelings of brimming hope and ecstasy, I proceeded into the current of people heading toward the newlyweds to give them a few brief words and an embrace. Finally reaching Bella and Edward, I hugged each of them, saying, "I'm so glad..." What else could I say? I was pretty sure that Edward would be able to interpret my tangle of thoughts, and find more meaningful words that I would have liked to say, so I settled with that, stepping away from them.

The flow of people was now heading outside, so I followed them out to the reception being held in the back. The twilit dance floor, with a floral canopy of flowers above, held the perfect atmosphere. Leaning against a small tree near the table of refreshments, I watched as everyone gathered around the dance floor, waiting for Bella and Edward. When they finally arrived, a nice, quiet love song played, and they had their first dance. Again, Bella seemed to have gained a surreal ability to glide across the floor, and everyone was evidently touched by the sweet moment.

Smiling, I closed my eyes and swayed slightly to the music. Before I knew it, the song changed again, and the number of dancers gradually increased until the dancing floor seemed pretty much filled to the brim.

I consistently found myself swaying to the music, eyes closed to relish the moment. If only I could dance...

"Keiran?"

Startled, I looked up into Emmett's eyes. It took me a moment to register that he was talking to me. He looked especially sharp in a perfectly-fitting tux, and a blue rose tucked in his tux pocket. He was looking at me expectantly, his golden eyes gazing into mine.

Finally, I stuttered, "Y-yes?" We hadn't really talked ever since the incident, so I was quite caught off guard.

Smiling, he asked, "Would you like to dance?"

I was still shell-shocked, so when he offered his hand, I just stared at it. I couldn't really believe this was really happening... Hadn't I distanced him enough?

Emmett's smile didn't falter as he stated, "You just put your hand in mine." Using his other hand, he gently took my hand and placed it in his offered hand. "See? Simple enough."

Looking back into his eyes, I couldn't help a little childish giggle. He made it feel as natural as breathing... Just like before.

"Come on," Emmett whispered, beaming as he guided me to the dance floor.

I felt nervousness creeping in. I'd never danced before! How was I supposed to up and learn it right here and now?

Emmett, observing me, saw my evident nervousness. "Here," he said, lifting me up by my hands and setting me on his large shoes. My shoes fit perfectly on the space provided. "Just hold my hands."

He made it so simple! Even though I was just holding onto his overly large hands, he made it feel as if we were actually doing a standard ballroom dance, twirling and gliding across the floor. I found myself giggling at some points, as if I was perfectly in tune with the child within me.

I heard Rose's chime of a laugh nearby, and glanced sideways to see her coming our way, her killer silk-white dress swaying from side to side in rhythm with her advance. Emmett and Rose shared a knowing look, and Rose bent down to speak to me. "Keiran, could I have a dance with Emmett?"

Suddenly, the ecstatic moment ended. Would I have another moment like this again? Did this mean Emmett and I were friends again, or was this simply a kind display of courtesy? "U-um, sure." I let go of Emmett's hands, stepping off his feet. Trying to hide my sudden mood swing, I looked up at Emmett and stated, "That was fun."

Emmett, not noticing what I had hidden, smiled back and said, "Thanks for the dance, Keiran."

And then they were gone. The perfect couple. Rosalie, her dress flaring out in the most impossibly beautifying ways, and Emmett, his tuxedo staying completely crisp throughout it all, pranced with many more embellishments, twisting and flying in a more complex dance, eyes only for one another. I couldn't stop myself from studying their waltz, impossibly beautiful...

And comparing it with mine and Emmett's toddle. Yes, I couldn't resist tearing myself to pieces; if I was going to nick myself at all, I might as well finish the job.

Looking away as tears bit at the corners of my eyes, I found that I was still standing where Emmett and Rose had left me. Quickly, I pushed through the crowd, not caring that I was being rude. I couldn't let someone see me crying over something beyond my years. I came back to the tree I'd been standing by earlier. Looking back, I observed that they were still in perfect view from here.

I found myself feeling...loathing? No, I couldn't loathe either of them! Was this another aftertaste of the dream? Or maybe this was jealousy, or envy. But why? They were soul mates, bound to be together for the eternities. Never to be torn apart. Concentrating on Emmett, his glorious grin beaming as he danced so fluidly with his wife...

I ultimately realized that he had never missed me. Never would. My existence wasn't the center of his world. How was he to know that he was the center of my world?