"I can't believe that asshole would do this crap to you! I mean yeah its typical but seriously?! Did you see how skanky that chick was?!" Sam ranted at Cas, pacing back and forth along his bedroom floor and waving his hands above his head. It was taking all his self control not to storm out of the room, find his idiot brother and beat him to a bloody pulp for treating the Angel this way. Cas was sitting on the end of Sam's bed, slumped over with his head in his hands looking completely defeated and Sam couldn't help but feel utterly heart sorry for him. He knew what it was like falling in love with someone who had absolutely no interest in you, and preferred to consort instead with slutty easy bitches with no bite in them. Then again at least when it came to competition you couldn't say fairer than the Goddess Kali…but poor Castiel had been passed over for some whore Dean met in a bar and -that- had to hurt. Sam sighed heavily and took a seat beside his friend, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

"Don't give up yet, Cas…we are gonna keep working this till Dean realises what he is missing…" Sam explained and Cas snorted, shaking his head.

"I still don't understand what you mean by that, Sam? Or why you held me like that when Dean was watching, he did not seem best pleased by your actions…" Cas said, looking a little fearful. "I am not good with these Human emotions Sam, but I have a strange feeling he thought that we were…" Cas lowered his voice to a hushed tone, like he was sharing a secret. "Intimate!" Sam couldn't help but grin widely at the Angels innocence…for such an old and wise being he could be downright naïve at times.

"But don't you see, Cas…that's the point! I want him to think that way!" Sam said with a grin and Castiel tilted his head again looking confused. After a few moments he suddenly looked nervous and gulped a little.

"Oh…well, Sam as flattering as that is, I really don't…I mean you and I are not…" Cas began to stutter and Sam outright laughed at the Angels misunderstanding.

"No, Cas that's not what I mean. I don't like you like that, I just want Dean to -think- that I do…Understand?" Sam asked and Cas' mouth dropped open in realization.

"Sam are you suggesting we make Dean jealous?!" Cas gasped in horror at Sam's suggestion, wondering if the young man had finally gone insane. "You do know he has a gun, correct? It may not work on me but you would be risking, at the very least, your testicles…He has stated on a few times he would remove them if from anyone who 'messed with me' and I am not an expert but this seems like 'messing' to me…"

"This is the point though, Cas! He doesn't want anyone to mess with you but he wont do it himself…what are you supposed to never date anyone, ever, while he whores around in bars and leaves you alone all day…what are you, his wife?! He needs to make a choice and he wont do that if he thinks you have no other options…but if he thinks you could easily get someone else then presto! Suddenly he wants you…" Sam said and Cas just shook his head with a sigh.

"Why do you Humans have to make everything so complicated…" Cas murmured, pinching the bridge of his nose as he felt a stress headache beginning in his vessels brain. "This is simple in Heaven, you go up to your interest and you puff up your feathers…None of this backwards talk and hiding…How in the world you have survived this long I will never understand!" Sam listened to Cas rant as he went to his wardrobe and pulled out a hidden bottle of whiskey from behind the mountain of junk. He took a slug straight from the bottle and handed it to Cas with a warning.

"No mojo tonight, let it work on you…"

Castiel nodded and took the bottle from Sam with a smile, feeling happier now all thanks to his good friend. He looked at the bottle for a moment and slowly a grin overtook his features.

"Maybe just a little mojo…" Cas said to himself quietly before taking a long drink from the bottle. Sam was only partly watching him as he searched for his laptop - intending on playing some music for background noise - but when he took the bottle back he could have sworn that there was no change in the amount…weird.

TWO HOURS LATER

Sam was sprawled out on his bed, trying desperately to gulp in air between his laughs as Castiel talked right over him, barely noticing the Hunter was about to die from laughing.

"I fail to see how this is funny, Sam! My true forms genitalia has never been right since! Gabriel always was a douchebag!" Cas ranted as he swayed on the spot with the bottle of whiskey in his hand. Sam had already asked Castiel how on Earth they were drinking from the same bottle but Cas had just tapped his nose with his finger and winked at him.

"That would be telling the secret, Sam! Shhhh" Cas said, giggling as he talked and Sam couldn't help but pull the Angel into a bear hug.

"You are such an idiot Cas, but I love you…" Sam said as he crushed the smaller man in his arms. Cas squeezed him back tightly and sighed.

"At least someone does…" Cas mumbled and Sam practically lifted him off his feet as he stood him up.

"Hey! My brother…" Sam said, pointing at the door. "That idiot…is an idiot. And he'll see soon that he is and he'll be all sorry and we can say AH-HA! And then, then…He'll be sorry! You know what I mean, right?" Sam said and Cas just stared at the man with total confusion.

"Not in the slightest, Sam…" Cas finally said, snagging the bottle from Sam's hands and taking another long drink.

"Hey!" Sam yelled and tried to snatch the bottle back but Cas was too quick for him, ducking out of the way and putting Sam completely off balance. Cas watched in horror as Sam began to topple forward on his giant legs and then quite suddenly he was crashing to the floor, shaking the whole room around him on impact.

"SAM!" Cas squealed loudly and rushed to the young mans side, instantly sobering up and bringing Sam out with him. The Hunter groaned loudly and whimpered as Castiel rolled him onto his back, wincing in pain.

"Does it hurt? Let me see…" Cas said and Sam tried to pull away as Cas placed a hand on his back.

"Don't…hurts…" Sam gasped as Cas' fingers found the point on his back were his muscle was spasming and aching from the fall. Cas hushed him gently.

"I promise I'll be gentle, Sam…But I have to do this, otherwise I could hurt you, understand?" Cas spoke to him gently and Sam sighed, nodding. Cas helped the Hunter to sit up and very slowly got him to his feet, walking him towards the bed and lying him down.

"On your front, Sam…it'll be more comfortable." Cas said as he helped him down and sat beside him on the bed, prodding at his back gently to determine where the pain was worst. When Sam suddenly let out a sharp gasp he knew he had found it.

"That's the spot, right there…you feel it, Sam?" Cas asked and Sam nodded, groaning aloud again as Cas pulled back.

"I need you to take off your shirt and lie down again…" Cas ordered and Sam began to protest, but Cas was having none of his excuses. This was his fault and he intended to make it better.

"But Cas…"

"Now, Sam!" Cas snapped and Sam just rolled his eyes at his friends insistence, pulling his shirt over his head and laying back down on his front. Cas took a moment to examine the area before placing both hands on his back and rubbing in gentle circles, feeling the muscle giving way under the pressure.

"Oh God, Cas!" Sam moaned loudly, burying his face in the pillow and whimpering. "Sorry…just so good" He whispered softly with a red face and Cas laughed a little.

"That's it Sam, let it out…I want you to tell me how it feels…" Cas said, needing to know where it hurt so as to better help his friend.

"Feels pretty freakin' good so far…holy fuck, where did you learn this…" Sam gasped and moaned through Cas' massage, his breathing heavy as all the muscles tightened and relaxed under his magic fingers.

"I've travelled the world many times in my time, Sam…Vienna…Rio…Amsterdam…Many places well known for these kinds of activities…I've been told I am rather good with my hands." Cas explained as his friend writhed on the bed.

"Oh, you are amazing Cas. Please don't stop…" Sam whimpered as Cas moved closer to the base of his back and the source of his pain, and he tensed a little as a hand swiped over it gently.

"I'm not going to stop till you're feeling good Sam…But I need you to relax so I can hit the spot…It'll only hurt for a little minute then it'll feel really good I promise." Cas said as he applied more pressure, kneading the muscle and finally hitting the sore spot right on. Sam squealed and began babbling as Cas worked the muscle loose, waiting on the pop…

"Oh God, yes Cas, that's it right there…Oh god!" Sam screamed as the muscle finally popped and the Hunter went like putty in Castiel's hands, letting out a long shuddering breath.

"Oh that was the best ever, Cas…" Sam said, his voice muffled by the pillow under his face, and Castiel smiled widely at his happy friend…then from through the wall came the oddest noise in the world…

"Oh fuck, Gabriel!"

Sam went tense under Cas again and they both shared a horrified look, suddenly yelling out in sync…

"GABRIEL?!"