Disclaimer: All characters depicted herein are the sole property of Charlaine Harris and HBO.

Chapter 11 - Eric

Eric took a step back, as if I had hit him. Tears sprang from my eyes. Eric didn't respond. "How could you?" I screamed at him.

"Is this really what you think of me?" He asked, his voice barely above a whisper. He stared at me as if he were lost, and searching for something. "Do you really believe I am capable of such a thing? Do you really not know how much I love you? That I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you?"

I couldn't make myself respond. The answer was obvious. He took another step back. "I see." He said. It took a moment but Eric schooled his features, a skill he had perfected over a thousand years. "That is of no mind. You thought the same of me when we met, and you came to love me. You will again, my wife." He told me dismissively. "I do not have Jenna, and I would not have kidnapped a human girl you have only recently befriended. If I were the vampire you believe me capable of being I would have taken someone much closer to you, to ensure your bonding with me, and I wouldn't have made it so easy to track where I had taken them. If I could return her to you with just my words, I would in an instant my love, make no mistake." He explained.

I was mollified. I really did think Eric was capable of something this devious. I had been so angry with him over everything that had happened, I convinced myself that he was capable of anything to get what he wanted. That he didn't really love me. The look on his face when I accused him, proved that I was wrong. As imperfect as Eric had been, he did and does truly love me. My anger had been quelled and I realized I was wrong to accuse him. He had been devious in the past, yes, but not cruel, not to me. And if I were being honest with myself not everything that happened was his fault, not even our bond was wholly of his doing. He didn't glamour me to fall in love with him, that was of my own doing. He had tricked me into this 'marriage' but I hadn't asked what was in the black velvet square, and I hadn't looked. I may not have consented to the marriage, but I was not wholly without sin. These were thoughts for another time though, because if Eric didn't have Jenna, then Victor surely did.

"I'm sorry." I told Eric honestly.

"You can make it up to me later," Eric responded. He flashed a sexy grin, to which Bill responded by tensing. Luckily Eric didn't see as Bill was behind him, Eric and I having risen to our feet during the previous moments. "For now, we need a plan," He said. "It is too late to leave for New Orleans now, we will never make it before sunrise, even if I were to drive." Eric said referring to his insistence on trying to double the speed limit. "We will make the arrangements tonight and leave as soon as the sun sets. I will call Victor and let him know we will arrive tomorrow. I will tell him that my bride wishes to see New Orleans. Compton, you will have to arrive separately, it would be inappropriate for me to allow Sookie to consort with her former lover." Eric said, taking some amount of delight in the last part.

I wanted to object to putting on the show, but I couldn't. Not only did I need Eric's help, but my 'marriage' with Eric was the only thing keeping me safe from the most overt of dangers. I needed the guise of Eric's wife, even if I didn't want it.

"Should I call Jenna back, and let her know?" I asked.

"No, not yet. Call her in the morning, as if you had just received her message upon waking. Speak to her as you normally would, be perky. I'm sure she won't be able to answer if she is being held, so you will just leave a message." Eric responded. "In order to not waste time at sundown, you should stay here tonight," He told me, his mouth turning up at the corners in a near smile. It faded though as he looked at Bill. "You as well Compton. I have suitable accommodations for you both." Eric said.

Even if Bill had wanted to leave, Eric was his Sherriff and he had to obey. I on the other hand could try to leave, but I simply would not leave Eric alone with Bill. "You know where they can be found," Eric said inclining his head to Bill. "Sookie, I would like to talk to you." He told me. I looked at Bill, knowing that there was nothing I could say to him without causing further problems. He nodded and I followed Eric.

Eric took me to his office. He sat behind the solid cherry desk, and I sat in a chair to the side. Still feeling bad about having accused him of taking Jenna, I stared at my feet.

"Sookie," He said in his smooth voice. "I love you." I looked up, not expecting the conversation to go this way. "You were right to think that I am capable much in order to have my ends met. After so long, being with you, being in love with you, being bonded with you; Sookie, your pain is mine. For you to think that I could…" He said and his voice trailed off.

"Eric, I'm sorry," I told him, barely above a whisper.

"Did you ever love me?" He asked. He sounded hurt, something I had never heard from him.

"Of course!" I responded, startled. "I did truly love you. Just not as much as I thought I did. The bond made everything seem so much more," I explained.

"You did truly love me. Does that mean you don't at all, now?"

"You will always have a piece of my heart, but no. I'm not in love with you at all anymore," I told him, my heart aching. It was almost true, but the little flicker of love I still held for him was nothing compared for how I felt for Bill and I didn't want to give Eric any false hope.

"Why not?" Eric demanded. He sounded angry and maybe he was, but given the way this conversation had gone I'd be willing to bet it was because he was in pain. It hurt me to be hurting him, but there was nothing for it. It was well and truly over, and my heart belonged to another, though I was not going to tell him that part.

"To be in love, you have to have trust. I've put too much of the blame for some of the things between us on you, I know. But you have tricked me at every turn. A lot of the things that have gone on in my last in the last few years are because of my being close to you, both physically and emotionally, and while that isn't completely your fault, it is a problem. Mainly though, you're just not the one for me. I don't want to be a vampire Eric. What happens when I age? Will you still love me when I'm 50? What about when I'm 70? Will you still be happy with me when I'm no longer able to enjoy sex with you as often, or at all? One day you will leave me, or one day you won't be content to watch me age, and you will turn me." I explained.

Eric's voice was pleading when he responded, "I love you Sookie, no matter what. I will love you until you take your last breath, and beyond. I would never change you against your will, and I would never forsake you due to age. I love you. Why can't you see that?"

"I'm sorry Eric. I believe you love me, I do. But not enough. I don't believe you would stay with me until I die. Which one day I will." I told him.

Eric took a moment to let my words sink in. Whether in his heart he agreed, or if he had fooled himself into believing otherwise I don't know, and he didn't say. I rose to leave, but he stopped me. "Tomorrow we must arrive as one. Our marriage is still binding in the vampire world. I still love you, but you must act the part. I will admit, this is something I will appreciate but in honesty this is far more for your safety than for my enjoyment. Victor must see you as mine. You will need my scent on you." I began to protest, but he stopped me. "I don't think I could, with you tonight. Not without harming you. You should sleep in my bed, where my scent is strong. I will sleep elsewhere."

"I'm sorry." I told him, meaning it.

"But it changes nothing," He said rising from his chair. He kissed my forehead, and walked out, leaving me sitting alone in his office, not sure how I felt.