A.N. - And so the arrival of Chapter 13! It's a really deep and emotional chapter so BEWARE! Lots of thoughts going through Hiccup's head and the tossing and turning of whether or not he should stay with Toothless or stay with his village. Read and find out.

"Come stop your crying,

It'll be all right.

Just take my hand, hold it tight.

I will protect you from all around you.

I will be here, don't you cry."

After that visit with my father, I didn't really want to go home because I didn't want to risk the chance that he still might be awake and want to talk…and right now I really wasn't in the mood for talking. I wasn't in the mood to talk anybody! So to keep from running into Gobber I left the shop and went to the outer most part of the village, and I sat on the dock wondering if anyone would care if I took off and left.

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. It was so much harder to sort my thoughts and think clearly, it's always one side of me against the other ever since I found Toothless. I have the one side that really wants to help him and make sure that he could fly again, but then on the other, I had my father, Gobber and the rest of the village who raised me. I mean sure they thought me an irritating nuisance that was always in the way, but still they are my village and I couldn't really turn my back on them.

Oh, but I wouldn't have all the fame and praise that I have now if it weren't for Toothless. He's the only reason that people even think that I'm worth while now, I don't really know where I'd be now if I hadn't met him when I did. I couldn't really turn my back on him now, not that I'd want to anyway. Sure, he's a dragon, but after spending weeks with him and he became a best friend to me…but then again they're my family!

I furiously ran my fingers through my hair and glared at the moonlight that shone of the water top. I knew I couldn't keep juggling keeping my village happy and Toothless. It was just too much but I knew I had to choose one. I slowly stood up and looked at the sun slowly sinking into the edge of the ocean, wondering if I could just jump on Toothless and find somewhere else to live. A shiver passed through me as the cold wind brushed my clothes and shifted my hair.

No, I couldn't leave them, no matter how they treated me in the past they were my family, this was my village…my home and what kind of person would I be if I just turned my back on them. No, I couldn't do it…I wouldn't to just up and leave. No matter what! I have to see this through to the end. Like it or not I am a Viking and Vikings don't run...from anything.

-Break-

I had only a few hours of sleep because my mind kept churning on all the scenarios that my decisions could lead me, all of them were less then good. There really was no good way this could end. All scenarios involved either leaving Toothless, Toothless dying because they find out about him, or having me banished from my village…because I turned my back on them by associating with the so-called monsters. All of which I wasn't to keen on happening but I knew that one was bound to happen eventually. I could beat them to the punch and just leave without them ever having known that I ever hid Toothless from them.

I had made it to the ring in the briskness of the morning; I wanted to get there early before my father woke up. I'd been lucky enough to come home and he'd been asleep so I decided to leave before he woke up. I really couldn't face him, not when everything wasn't what it appeared to be. Leaning against the wall, I fiddled with the helmet that my dad had given me the night before. He'd said it held half of my moms breast plate…which was a disturbing thought in itself. I mean I wouldn't want my kids wear helmets of their mothers breast plate…it just seemed so, morbid.

I gently ran my fingers over the cool metal and couldn't help but wonder how long my father had been holding out to give this to me. Tears brimmed in my eyes as I remembered the look on his face when he gave it to me. I leaned my forehead against the cool metal and closed my eyes hoping upon hope that it would all turn out okay. I'll just lose the last fight against the dragon so that Astrid would win and get the honor of killing the Nightmare.

I couldn't help but flinch at the image of the Nightmare being killed as a right of passage. That wasn't right, I mean they aren't humans but they are alive and I know they can feel pain like we can. They have life…life that we took away so quickly without a thought or care. It was horrible…it was heartless. So what does that make us? Are we the monsters?

'Oh, what's happening to me? Why am I thinking about this? There's no way we're the monsters...is there?'

My mind flew back to when I'd found Toothless all bound in the forest, how I couldn't kill him. Something pulled at me when I looked at his eyes and everything changed. Everything I thought, everything I learned…everything I knew was…wrong. After I saw his eyes, I couldn't imagine seeing them…void of light. Light that had been dulled due to my actions. I bit my lip and stared at the rock hard ground beneath my feet. It shouldn't have pulled at me like it did. I mean I was a Viking, I was suppose to be able to kill without thought so why did I let him go? It was because that day I figured out they are living creatures…not monsters.

"Hiccup? What're you doing here so early?"

I blinked out of my thoughts as a voice shot through them. I turned to the boy in front of me to find it was Fishlegs. Strange I didn't think he got up this early…of course I really wasn't one to be up this early. "I couldn't sleep…"

"Yeah I know! Me neither, I can't wait to see who wins today! I mean I know you'll win…but still it'll be close!"

"Heh, you've got more confidence in me then I do."

He looked like I'd hit him. "What are you talking about? You've come so far, I mean you beat Snotlout, Hiccup. Snotlout!"

I couldn't help but smile at that thought. I'd also beaten the terrible twins and even Fishlegs himself, but there was one person that I'd had yet to surpass. "That's great, but I think that you've forgotten about Astrid."

I watched him as he flinched and gave me a look of pity. "Oh, heh right. She's going to be tough one to beat."

"You don't have to tell me that, she…" I was going to add that she deserves to win, but Vikings are all about competition and I shouldn't say things like that so I just added; "she is really competitive."

"Yeah, I would have figured that she'd want some sort of good competition…but she seems to hate it that you're as good as she is…probably better!"

I forced a laugh at his comment, "Better? I think she'd beat you just for saying that."

"Well, it is true. I haven't seen dragons react to anyone the way they respond to you. How you scared that Zippleback, tricked that Gronkle, took down the Nadder; and not to mention how you distracted thatTerror. That was awesome!"

I shied away from his awed expression; it just made me feel guiltier about the secret behind my sudden success. I bit my lip and tried to find something else to look at.

"…why you're so nervous?"

I must have zoned out again. I quirked a brow as I turned to face him again. "What?"

"I was just wondering if you were nervous because you have to go against Astrid?"

"Yeah, I am."

My eyes shifted to the ocean that lay out just beyond the ledge. The sun light shone off the top if it and lit up the sky. The gold and blue colors meshed to form Astrid's face, glaring at me similar to the look she gave after I'd found her in the woods. She had worked so hard to get where she was and she came by her talent honestly. She got to where she was with hard work and even harder training. She hadn't been at the top of our class for no reason.

I jumped as a hand touched my shoulder, when I did this it was quickly removed and I turned to see Fishlegs take a few steps back. "Sorry…I was just…"

"No, I'm sorry…I just…I'm not use to having people…doing that…" I ran my fingers through my hair and decided that I wanted to be anywhere but here. Fishlegs looked like he had the same thought going through his head. His squinty eyes shifted nervously between the ring and me, he was acting weird.

"Was there something else Fishlegs?"

He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, then shut it again just as quickly. I couldn't help but raise a curious brow at him which made him act all the more nervous.

"Fishlegs?"

"I gotta go Hiccup. Good luck in the ring today!" With that, he was off, leaving me there curious and even more confused. Shaking my head, I turned and walked back to my perch by the door. As much as I hated the silence that left me alone with my thoughts, I hated the awestruck looks of the villagers and the prideful looks of Gobber and my dad even more.

Sliding down into a sitting position I stared at the helmet again, the sun glinted off the metal that looked to be newly polished. I couldn't help but smile at the thought that my father had gotten it polished and looking new to give it to me. A frown tugged at my lips again, he never would have given it to me if he knew.

"Ah, so I see he gave yeh th' helmet, S'bou' time. Lesse 'ow it looks on yeh eh?"

My eyes shifted up to come face to face with my mentor. Looking down at the helmet, I then placed it on top of my head. It was a smidge too big and fell in front of my eyes. Nudging it up I looked up to see that familiar glint of pride in his eyes and immediately wanted to pull it back down.

"Tha's more like it. Yer lookin' more like a Vikin' now."

"Oh?" 'Cause I feel less like one.' I thought through my smile. "Seems a little big don't cha think?"

"Yeh'll grow in teh it."

He smiled at me and put his hand on my shoulder. I ran my tongue over my lips as he squeezed my shoulder. That same prideful look was in his eyes and I felt my heart twist, but I let a smile twist my features.

"What?"

"Yeh've definitely come a long way lad."

"Have I?"

"Course yeh have! I mean look at'cha! Yeh've shot up in th' ranks; beaten' almos' everyone at dragon trainin' and yeh ain' th' kid that walked through those door on th' firs' day. Yeh've really grown Hiccup."

"I guess I have…haven't I?"

I looked down, causing the helmet to slide down my head again causing Gobber to chuckle and move it out of my line of sight.

"Yes, yeh have. And no matter th' result of today's tes'. Yer a Vikin' in my eyes."

I was struck by his words. No one has ever said anything like that to me.

"Yer already one o'us." He slapped my shoulder and knocked me forward, on my knees and my helmet off my head. "Still need teh get some meat on 'em bones." He picked me up by the scruff of my shirt and placed me on my feet again. "We can work on tha' la'er though. Don' have time righ' now. Got teh set up th' ring. Well, see you soon Hiccup!"

I looked after my mentor as he hobbled away, then my eyes became downcast as they fell on the helmet that lay on the ground at my feet. That's what I'd wanted to hear…but it wasn't true. I was nothing like them. I knelt down and picked up the helmet that felt cold and foreign in my hand.

"That's just it Gobber, I don't know if I can be one of you guys."

-Break-

Not long after the conversation with Gobber, the final stage in the training session started. Gobber had set up the ring with little wooden boards that we could hide behind while trying to devise a way to take down the Gronkle that was flying around looking for someone to fry.

I had slid down behind one of the boards, trying to lie low enough so that Astrid could win this competition. I really hoped this would be over soon; I wanted to get out of the ring and to where Toothless was, I really think that flying would calm my racing mind enough to sort my thoughts into a coherent sentence.

'Oh Thor's hammer! This helmet keeps slipping!' I groaned as I shoved it back onto my forehead. Sliding my hand back into my shield I peeked around the corner. 'I wonder where Astrid disappeared to…I saw her when she came in…but now…' That was when I felt the wooden plank move and my heart jumped into my throat as I turned and came face to face with Astrid.

I really couldn't help the smile that formed on my face, she still had this amazing effect to turn my mind into mush. Her eyes regarded me for a second, darted toward the dragon and then glared angrily at me. A sneer formed on her perfect lips and she shoved my shield down causing me to fall forward.

"Stay out of my way!"

Her voice was smooth as silk, but as cold as the water in the winter. A fire burned in her eyes; whether it was anger, or determination I couldn't tell but either way they were looking at me. This was an amazing feat in itself, before she barely glanced at me…but now she looked at me. Of course it was mostly in anger, but still it's progress in my book.

"I'm winning this thing."

"Uh…please! B-by all means!"

I really did want her to win, why did she think I was crouched here not really doing anything in the first place. Her blue eyes watched me warily for a moment before bounding off to hide behind another wooden plank.

'Well, that went well…' I groaned inwardly as I stood up. I wanted to try to make myself as small as possible and let Astrid win this one. Looking around I caught my dads' eyes, forcing a smile on my face I really tried to look like I was enjoying this when in reality I would rather be flying with Toothless.

Turning around I caught Astrid pushing herself to get closer to the Gronkle, peeking her blond head above the gate before launching herself at another one. That was when the Gronkles beady eyes laid on me.

'Uh-oh…'

I ran and ducked behind another wooden gate. I could hear the Gronkles' snorting getting closer.

'No, no, no! Don't come to me!'

I peeked around the corner and came face to face with it. Its tail wiggling, and left me wishing that I'd not come here the night before.

'Come on buddy, don't do this…not now.'

He got closer and I felt my back hit the wooden gate and in a panic I dropped my shield and axe and scratched and pinched the nerve under his chin.

As he fell, I heard Astrid start screaming and instinctively I flinched. The uproar of Viking shouts of victory drowned out Astrids' yell that slowly faded. Slowly I opened my eyes and that's when I realized that I had just made a big mistake. Astrids' eyes looked like they were gonna burst out of her socket. Then I could've sworn a flare of anger torched her blue hues. I didn't really know what to do, she looked about ready to burst.

That was when she squeezed her eyes shut and buried her fingers in her blond hair, detangling some or it from her braid and started spinning around angrily and started swinging her axe through the air, I swallowed because I knew that she wanted to aim that at my neck.

"Son of half troll, rat eating munch bucket!"

I started to slowly walk backward away from her.

"So…later!" I tried to turn and walk away, but I was stopped when something hooked onto the scruff of my shirt and yanked me back.

"Oh, no yeh don'."

Panic filled me, as I wasn't allowed to leave like normal, my heart pumped the adrenaline through my veins and turned to face Gobber…I had to come up with something and make it sound believable.

"I'm kind of late f-"

I didn't get the pleasure to finish my sentence when the cold shape of Astrids' axe pushed right into my throat. Looking at her, you wouldn't have guessed her to look…so…so…crazy wasn't the word I was looking for but it's the only one that came to mind as she glowered at me with her fire lit blue hues.

"Late for what, exactly?"

I opened and closed my mouth; I was drawing a complete blank as I stared into her viscously angry eyes. I felt bad for knocking out the Gronkle but I couldn't risk him cozying up to me in front of the entire village, that would have been a complete disaster. Now I'm thinking that I would rather be faced with the questions as to why the dragon was acting like a pet around me then with wrath of the girl that was in front of me right now.

"All righ' quiet down! Quiet down! Th' Elder has decided!"

'Oh right, that.'

Immediately she pulled back from and stood as tall as she could. Moving to the other side of Gobber, I rubbed my neck to make sure that it hadn't left anything, I wasn't paying any attention until I heard the villagers make this 'Ohhhh' sound. My heart dropped as I looked up at Gobbers hand as he pointed to me.

'Please not me, not me!'

I tried to will my self to disappear but I must not have because then I heard a cheering as I've never heard before. Inwardly groaning I chanced a look at Astrid and she looked ready to kill something.

Biting my lip I tried to run, but Gobber had wrapped a burly arm around me.

"Oh, yeh've done it Hiccup! Yeh ge' teh kill th' dragon!"

"Hiccup, Hiccup, Hiccup!"

"Yes! Tha's m'boy!"

I was picked up and thrown onto Fishlegs shoulders; I forced a smile on my face as they started to carry me out of the ring. Forcing a smile on my face I tried to make my voice sound believable; "Oh yes, I can't wait I am so…excited!"

Excited! Hah! Try far from it! I didn't want to kill the dragon…I…couldn't kill dragons and they would all find that out…I couldn't let them find that out. I had to do something though…and fast.

"Okay…that's great. You…you can put me down now."

Fishlegs placed me back on the ground where everyone just crowded around me. Clapping me on the shoulder and almost knocking me off my feet.

"That was so amazing!"

"Only the chiefs' son could take a Gronkle down so fast!"

"Way to go Hiccup!"

"I knew you could do it!"

I was met with a slew of congratulations and looks of awe. I started feeling like I couldn't breathe. I needed to get away from all this; I just had to.

"I…I need some air!"

I pushed my way from the crowd and ran as far from them as I could and I ran away from the ring, away from the crowd…away from the amazed eyes and proud stares. It was just to much, they expected so much from me and I knew that I couldn't live up to what I'd shown them, to what I'd appeared to be.

I couldn't do this anymore, I really couldn't! I had to stop this before it got any worse then it already was…I had to leave. This is the only solution that seemed reasonable right now, it would save my father from the disappointment of having a dragon lover for a son and ultimately free Toothless from the bindings that kept him on the island…besides seeing the world might not be such a bad idea. I had no idea where I was going to go, but anywhere is better then here. Would I come back…probably not.

As I reached the door to my house, I slowly turned to see the village buzzing with joy behind me.

'This is the best…for everyone.'

-Break-

As I approached Toothless' hideaway I could feel my footsteps get slower and slower. It felt like something was trying to pull back to the village, I didn't know what it could possibly be but it was certainly there. It was like an irritating little voice was telling not to, for my sanity, I pushed it to the far reaches of my mind.

When I entered the valley, I noted that there was something odd; Toothless wasn't waiting at the entrance for me. This was weird because he was usually there.

"Toothless, c'mon buddy we're leaving! That's it we're leaving, let's pack it up buddy! We're leaving…forever."

That last word tasted bitter on my tongue, so bitter I almost washed my mouth out with water. Throwing the pack down, I sighed, as there was still no sight of the big dragon. Opting to look for him later, I decided to double, double check that I'd gotten everything that I needed for the trip.

'Let's see, water pack, food pack, blanket, and some extra clothes. That's everything.'

It wasn't much but I had to pack light…light and fast. I wanted to leave before my father got home. Luck was on my side as he was probably in charge of the festivities for the next and final test.

'C'mon Hiccup! Don't think about that! Focus Hiccup!'

"Oh, man…" I muttered as I slowly stood up and reached down to re-check that the straps that connected me to Toothless' saddle were still in working condition. That was when a scraping sound stopped my heart and made my blood run cold. Fear ran through me as I realized that there was a shadow that fell on the ground, that was too small to be Toothless.

Looking up, I lept back and it was everything I could do to keep from falling backward on a boulder that had to be strategically placed behind my foot. It was Astrid, holding her axe and sharpening it with a small rock.

"Ah, what the-what are you doing here?"

My eyes searched frantically for the black beast, not seeing him around I began to get very nervous as the blond Viking dropped the rock gracefully from her hand, the sun shone brightly behind her, illuminating her blond hair even more. It also reflected off the sharp blade in her hand.

"I wanna know what's going on." Why did all her words have to fall out smooth as silk, but still held that sharp tone that got your attention and let you know she was serious.

Those deep but icy eyes flicked to me and froze me with a glare. Slamming the end of her axe on the rock, she pushed herself gracefully off it and landed in front of me. This made me nervous, and the closer she got to me the more nervous I became. So out of reflex I started backing away from her.

"No one just gets as good as you do…especially you…start talking!"

"I-I-Uh…"

"Are you training with someone?"

"Uh…uh…t-training?"

"It better not involve this!"

She snarled as she picked me up by the shoulder of my flying vest. Then quickly dropped me, her eyes never leaving me in a stare that made want to look away and stare into them at the same time. They were as scary as the were beautiful. Come on Hiccup, focus!

"I know this looks really bad, but-AH!"

With a thud, she threw me on the ground, and a breath escaped my lips as my back met the ground. She looked away from me and searched the grounds. Then the breath left my lungs with a whoosh as her boot met my diaphragm. Coughing, I pulled myself up and something told me she knew someone else was here. I had to do something, quick Hiccup think fast!

"Oh! You're right! You're right!" I ran to stand in front of me, but she smoothly evaded me as if I wasn't an obstacle, I wasn't that easy to get rid of though. I kept at her side, trying my best to persuade her to pay attention to me. "You got me! I-I'm through with the lies! I've been making…outfits! And it's time that everyone knew." Her eyes still looked past me and kept scanning for something that was out there…which there was and she knew it. I knew that she knew, and that scared me. In one last attempt I grabbed her hand and placed it on my chest. "So go on, drag me back. Okay…here go."

No dice.

As I tired to walk away, she effortlessly grabbed my hand and yanked my wrist the wrong way, searing pain shot up my arm and I heard a popping sound. My knees buckled and I fell to the ground cupping my injured wrist.

"OW! Why would you do that?"

Then with out warning the breath left my lungs again as she swiftly kicked me in the ribs and knocked my back down…again. I coughed, which caused my ribs more injury. My lungs were already burning, my eyes watered from the pain in my right wrist and my now bruised ribs.

"That's for lies!"

'Lies?'

Spots dotted my eyes sight as the butt of her axe was dropped on my diaphragm causing me to gasp audibly for the air she kept pushing out and I wasn't able to get it back as fast. Gasping, I blearily blinked up as her image had been blurred with the tears that took over my eyes. I barely made out the last sentence she said. Sounded like; "t-ser very ing lse"…which made no sense. My head was spinning with the lack of oxygen and every other part of me felt heavy.

'Oh man.'

I heard a roar and my eyes shot open, I knew that Toothless had made his presence known. I tried hard to stand to show that I was okay but I didn't get far as the air left my lungs again when Astrids' arm knocked me down by my stomach and I landed hard on the ground.

"Get down!"

Toothless roared again and this time I heard loud thudding as he was running for her.

"Dragon! Dragon!"

"NO!"

She pulled back her axe, and my mind suddenly switched off, it was like I moved on autopilot. I leapt at Astrid and pushed her out of the way of Toothless, and in the same motion, I pried and pushed Astrids' axe away from her hands. Adrenaline pushed me to stand up and hold my hands out to try to stop the bloodbath that would surely happen should these two clash and I really didn't want either of them getting hurt.

"No, no! It's okay…" I looked between the two, my injuries didn't matter all that matter was keeping these two from killing each other. Turing to face Toothless, who had his teeth bared and looked down right angry. Standing on his back legs he snarled before falling back down on all fours. "She's a friend."

I turned around to face an extremely frightened and confused Astrid. She slowly stood to her feet, eyes never leaving the gigantic beast behind me.

"Don't worry, you just scared him."

I felt Toothless push me from behind and I put both my hands to try to stop him from lunging at her again. Deep throated, angry growls escaped his throat, as she looked at me confused.

"I scared him…" She flinched as he growled at her again. "…who is him?"

Taking a deep breath, I straightened up. "Astrid, Toothless. Toothless, Astrid."

I flinched as he snarled at the girl in front of me. Bewildered she looked between me and the snarling dragon that she knew would chomp her head off if given the okay. Then her eyes furrowed as she straightened up and Toothless snarled lowly at her movements. My heart dropped as she started backing away, I took a step forward and opened my mouth to try and say something but in an instant she shook her head and started running the direction she'd come.

'That's it, I'm done for! She's gonna tell everyone!'

"Da, da, da! We're dead!"

A snort came from my right and I heard Toothless start to lumbar away, thinning my lips, I spun around to see him retreating.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Where do you think you're going?"

I ran after the dragon, I must have still had some adrenaline coursing through my veins because I caught the dragon…or maybe he slowed down either way I grabbed a hold of the leather strap around his neck.

"This is partially your fault you know! If you'd just stayed low I would've found away to get her to go back to village…" sighing I pinched the bride of my nose not wanting to look at the dragons' eyes now. "That's neither here nor there. We have to stop her! We have to show her that you're good!"

Leaping onto his back, we took off and head toward where Astrid was. I had to find her, had to show her that Toothless was good and hopefully pull her onto my side…hopefully.