Okay next chapter, please review. (:
Rin could feel the mind numbing rage, he didn't just do what she thought he did.
Only he did, and she could feel the poison and saliva from his fangs move through her veins.
She was aware he was a demon, she was aware he could kill her, she was aware she was no match for him.
She just didn't care, Rin didn't give a single fuck about any of that. She couldn't feel anything except the rage consuming her gut, the stiffness of her body, the shock that was slowly wearing off.
"Did you just fucking MARK me?" She hissed at him.
She knew the answer, but her mind was trying to think of something to do, anything to get away from him and get him back for this. He just essentially took away her life.
Marking was a demons way of showing off their mate, this one was temporary since it would heal ..well to human eyes. Demons would always smell his scent mixed with hers, even if it grew weak it would still linger.
But everyone would see it, everyone knew what they were, boys would avoid her like the plague and girls would try to start something with all that "demon whore" bullshit. Since demons mating with humans was so rare it was still looked down upon.
There wouldn't be anyone for her now, and ending her year fighting and getting thrown in juvenile detention for trying to stab someone while getting jumped wasn't what she wanted to do. Girls already hated her, this would definitely give them more motive to gang up on her. At least she would still have Cierra, that's her best friend and she knew she would always be down for her.
And she was so full of self hatred, more so than usual, so full of revoltion for herself. Utter disgust and loathing. A part of her LIKED that he marked her, was willing and ready to be his mate. Willing to be his human bitch. Was relishing in the feeling that all the other males would know who she belonged to.
Who she belonged to? SHE BELONGED TO NO ONE.
She was so mad, feeling so much she didn't know what to do with herself. A demon, a fucking demon marked her against her will.
'Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccccck.'
She wasn't used to being so enraged, to such a rush of adrenaline, to being so angry she shook. She wanted something to ease it, to distract her from it.
Then she knew what to do to distract her from this emotional breakdown.
She took her knife from her back pocket and raked it down the front her forearm. She could feel relief, physical pain to get away from emotional torment.
Relief, if only in the form of agony.
Everything after that moved in slow motion, like a dream, nothing felt real ..she only knew she just cut herself very deeply, that she was bleeding. She didn't feel it anymore..maybe it wasn't real, maybe she was just dreaming. This would be her first lucid dream then, maybe she was about to wake up...
She was aware of the knife disappearing from her hand, aware of the strong arms she had fallen into..when had her legs given out? Why did her stomach just drop? She was moving ...where is she going? Who is taking her ...where? Everything moving so slowly but she was aware she was moving faster, faster than anything she had ever been in..'this is a strange dream...'
Someone kept calling out to her.
Who is calling her name? Sesshomaru was ..she could feel his chest vibrating from his voice...looking up at him brought unpleasant things to her mind, and she finally let the darkness she had been fighting take her.
Sesshomaru had watched her, felt all of the emotions swirling inside of her.
He was at ease as she was frozen, he could feel her rage, her blood curdling fury at being marked against her will.
His mate would get over it, she was his, and now she knew it and would be dealt with as she said otherwise or tried to hide his mark.
Then he sensed her satisfaction at the fact he marked her, it pleased him part of her knew and was satisfied at the fact he warded off other males and claimed her as his bitch. He knew she would relish in it, every submissive mate loved being marked and claimed by the dominant one, she was no exception.
What he didn't expect is to sense the absolute self hatred and disgust, for the blood curdling rage to also be directed at herself. He could predict this happened often, just not to this extent. With different extremes of one person in one person, one full of hate, one wanting salvation from that hate, and then her somewhere in the grey area.. he guessed self loathing would happen.
His mate hated herself.
This couldn't and wouldn't be accepted, he will ease that pain away, he will make her see how beautiful she is. She will learn to love herself, both extremes, unconditionally.
His mate would not suffer.
What shocked him was that when he dug deeper through her emotions, he could feel an inkling of justice and borderline pleasure at the hate she directed at herself.
His mate thinks she deserves her pain.
Why? She was perfect to him, even if she was but a mere human. She was both the sun and the moon.
There was a lot more to dive through, but he sensed something wrong. He could now feel her meltdown, he snapped his focus on her, but he did it seconds too late.
He watched, frozen, shocked, as she ran a knife down the front of her forearm almost into her palm, deeply. He watched as the relief flooded her faces and felt his stomach drop.
She could've cut her veins.
He was by her side faster than a human could blink, he caught her when he legs gave out, and he wasted no time in getting her to a mortal hospital. He mad no healers at his palace, and calling one over would only waste now precious time.
He looked down at her, into her eyes, eyes that seemed out of it, like she was only half aware of what was going on.
He was distressed, scared even. For the first time he felt panic, felt fear of losing this precious little human.
He hated it.
"Rin." Sesshomaru called out to her.
She didn't so much as glance at him.
"Rin."
She blinked.
"Rin."
She glanced up then, eyes still out of focus and pupils dilated. Then she frowned, and passed out in his arms.