CHAPTER 2

"Come on, Leah! Just this once, can you please lighten up?" I begged. We were out on patrol and Leah was more snarly that usual. She had just found out that Emily was pregnant a few days ago, and she wasn't taking it well.

"I'm so sorry, Embry. I don't mean to bum you out. I know your life is so tough – having to give up a date with Bambi or Tiffany or whatever the new bimbo-of-the-week's name is, just to patrol with bitchy me. God, how awful!" Her sarcasm was cutting.

"It was Mandy, actually, and she's kind of smart for a bimbo. She can spell her name and everything. Come on, Leah, work with me here." I really did hate seeing her so upset all of the time. The other guys just hated it and in turn hated to be with her. I really felt bad for her. I wished I could take some of that hurt away. I knew what it was like to have a hole in you that no one could seem to fill.

"Yea, I know Embry. I know you're trying to help. I'll try to focus on something else for awhile. So, why don't you tell me about your bim . . . uh, Mandy?"

"Yea. Well, yesterday I took her to the beach. We walked and I tried to get to know her a little better, you know? We have the same Math class, but I don't really know her that well. She told me about moving here when she was a freshman. I guess she used to live on another reservation east of here. She's actually related to Quil, somehow, I think."

"Did you talk her to death, or did you show her some of your 'Embry Magic?' "

I huffed at her. "Please. Of course we made out. Who can resist me?"

"Uh, hello? I'm right here."

"OK, besides you."

Leah took off at a run and I followed. Leah loved that she was the fasted one of all of us. I think it helped her a little to know she was special in some way. We finished the rest of our patrol, and Jared and Paul came to relieve us.

"Nothing?" Jared wanted to know.

"Pretty quiet out here," I answered.

"Damn!" Paul was always itching for a fight.

Leah had run off to phase back and put some clothes on. It was a lot harder for her, seeing she had more to cover than we did. I phased and slid my shorts back on. I walked toward where she had gone. "Leah? You still here?"

"Yes! Give me a minute, will you?" she shouted back at me from behind some bushes.

I waited and she walked out wearing some gym shorts and a tank top. "You want a ride home? The truck is parked at the beach," I asked.

"Sure, I guess. I'll race ya!" She hollered over her shoulder as she took off toward the beach. I laughed and followed. I knew she'd whip my ass, and I was tired, so I didn't try as hard.

I met up with her at the beach and she looked at me and said, "Ha! Beat your ass!" Then she smiled.

"You know, Leah," I panted, "you really have a beautiful smile. You should do it more often."

She stopped smiling and turned and looked toward the water. "Hey," I said as I walked over to her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. It was just an observation, you know? You really are pretty, Leah."

She looked over at me and said, "Thanks." She just stood there looking out at the water. The old Leah was taking over. Her shoulders slumped a little and I could see the mask slipping into place.

"Look, I'm not good at this, Leah. You know me, I'm too cocky for my own good. I shoot my mouth off . . ."

"Shut up, Embry, OK? Just stop." She wrapped her arms around her and looked back out at the water. She closed her eyes. I could feel she was trying hard to hold herself together.

"Whatever." I turned to go then stopped. Shit! For some reason, I couldn't leave her like that. "Um, you know, I'm not in any hurry to get home. I mean, my mom will just try to ground me again or something. I can stick around if you want me to," I offered. I wasn't sure what I would be getting myself into, but I hated to see her like this. She had been this way for too long.

She looked over at me. She studied my face for a second, I guess to see if I really meant it, or if I was just feeling sorry for her. At the moment, I wasn't really sure which it was myself. Maybe a little of both.

She nodded and started to walk down the beach. I took that as an invitation. We walked in silence down the beach. I had absolutely no idea what to say, so I just waited to see if she would talk.

"So . . . what did you do to get stuck patrolling with me? Did you piss Sam off or something?" Leah asked me.

"What? Why would you ask that?" I replied.

"Well, everyone hates patrolling with me. It's not like anyone volunteers for the job. Except Seth, and he just does it cause I'm his sister and he feels sorry for me. Not even Jake volunteers anymore."

"Sam asked me to, so I did. That's the whole story," I told her.

She snorted. "OK, whatever." We walked a little further. She crossed her arms in front of her as walked then she said, "I don't like being a bitch, you know. I hate it in fact. I was just starting to feel a little better then hearing that Emily is pregnant . . . was really hard. I mean, it's not like I didn't expect it. It's not like they can keep their hands off each other! You know how hard it is . . . to be around Sam and see his thoughts . . ." she stopped suddenly and turned to look at me. "God! I am so sick and tired of feeling like shit, Embry! I feel like a piece of garbage just thrown out! He used to look at ME and tell ME what a beautiful smile I had! ME! He used to hold ME and kiss ME! He was supposed to marry ME and have babies." The tears were falling fast now. She sank down to sit in the sand. She put her head in her hands and cried hard. "I can't take it anymore. I wish I could leave. Get the hell away from here. But, of course, I had to turn into a fucking werewolf and be bound to this place FOREVER!"

I was a little out of my element here. I wasn't sure what to do! Shit! I sat down beside her and pulled her into my arms. She actually allowed me to hold her. She put her head on my shoulder and cried. I just sat there and held her, and wondered, "How did I get myself into this?"

She finally pulled her head off of my shoulder and wiped her face with her hand. "God, Embry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."

I pulled off my t-shirt and handed it to her. "Here, it's wet already. You might as well use it to clean up."

She used my t-shirt to wipe her face then she gave me a small smile.

I looked at her and smiled. "It's OK."

"Look, I know that I have to move on. Sam certainly has. And I know that he didn't mean to fall in love with her. I mean, this fucking imprinting thing is so . . . awful." She looked out at the water again.

I could almost feel the pain she was in. It was that intense.

"Leah, I know it's not the same thing, but, I kind of understand what you're feeling. It's like . . . you have a hole inside of you, that only one person can fill. And you can't have that person, so the hole is just there and it aches, all the time."

She looked at me with squinted eyes and said, "Yea, something like that. How would you know?"

I hung my head for a minute and gave a big sigh. "I feel like that because . . . of not knowing who my father is." I looked out at the water. "And it kills me, Leah. I need to know where I come from, you know? Especially since this werewolf thing happened. You know how hard it is to be around these guys and have them wonder if I'm their bastard brother?"

"Wow, Embry. I'm sorry," she said softly.

"Yea, well. I asked her once. When I was 11. I got up the guts to ask my mom who my father was. She screamed at me that she couldn't tell me, and not to ask her again. I was too scared then to talk about it again. But now I just wonder if she even knows who my father is," I said angrily. I looked at her and said, "It's hard being a bastard, Leah. It's really hard sometimes."

Leah looked at me. "Embry, I had no idea. Even when we are patrolling, you never let on that it hurts you this much. I am so sorry."

She gave me a small smile and pushed the hair on my forehead away from my eyes. She really was more than pretty. Especially when she smiled. I found myself staring at her, looking into her eyes. I pulled my eyes away and looked out at the water.

"Embry, I know it's hard to think about Billy or Quil Sr. doing that . . . I mean they had good marriages, and . . ."

"Yea, I know, Leah! For me to exist, one of my best friends has to suffer with the idea that their fathers aren't who you thought they were. Another great thing about being a bastard."

"God, Embry, quit calling yourself that. I hate that word!" she yelled at me.

"It's what I am!" I gave a harsh laugh and said, "Although Sam doesn't mind. His dad wasn't much of a dad anyway, I guess. So who knows? Maybe it was him?" I picked up a rock and heaved it. I heard it plunk into the water. OK, enough of this. Time to change the subject. "Hey, speaking of imprinting," I said quickly.

"Were we?" she asked.

I went on, "Did you hear about Jake and Bella? They were at Sam's earlier today. Jake imprinted on Bella!" I told her.

"What?" She looked at me her eyes big with surprise. "Are you serious?"

"Yea! She told her fucking leech of a boyfriend to take a hike. She broke up with him. Can you believe that? She says that she's with Jake now. She loves him and wants to be with him. It's hard to believe, but I'm really happy for Jake, you know? He's my best friend, and I have had to hear him whine about how much he loves Bella for YEARS! I guess I'm glad his dream is finally coming true." I looked over at Leah. Great job. "His dream is coming true." Yea, just what she wanted to hear.

"God, Leah, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," I said quickly.

She looked at me and smiled. "No, it's fine. I'm glad for him, too. Although, I don't think I want to patrol with him for awhile."

"Geez, me neither. Just seeing some of the fantasies he's had in his head about her . . . I think they will be worse than Sam and Jared put together!" I gave a short laugh.

"Stop! I think I just threw up in my mouth," Leah said with a laugh.

"How bout I tell Sam to let us patrol together for awhile? Neither one of will have to put up with it then," I suggested.

She looked over at me with a quizzical look. "Yea, thanks, Embry. I think that's a good idea."

It got quiet again. I looked out at the water and said, "Sam, Jared, Quil and now Jake. Wonder who will imprint next." I looked over at Leah and said with a smile, "God, I hope it's not me! I know there are still plenty of hot girls at school that I haven't made out with yet!"

That did it. She finally let go and laughed. She shoved me and said, "I have a hard time believing that." I looked at her and laughed. She sighed and stood up. "I better get home. Mom worries until both Seth and I come back." She turned to make her way back down the beach.

I jumped up and joined her. We walked in silence to my truck. I walked ahead and opened the door for her. She smiled and said quietly, "Thanks."

I got into the driver's seat and took off for the Clearwater's house. "Embry?" Leah said as we drove down the road.

"Yea?"

"Thank you for talking to me tonight. And for telling me about . . . how you feel. I think it kind of helped."

I smiled at her. "Well, I am so glad that the horrible pain I bear made you feel so much better."

She shoved me and said, "You know that's not what I meant. I mean, it just helps to know that there is someone who understands a little how I feel."

"Yea, I know." I looked over at her and added, " Me too."

I pulled up to her house and she opened the door to get out. She turned and said, "Take it easy on those girls at school, Embry. You need to pace yourself!"

I laughed! "Yea, OK, Leah. Too many girls, not enough time!"

She closed the door and walked toward the door. I sat there and watched until she closed the front door behind her. Man! What a night this turned out to be! Why did I tell her all that stuff? I shook my head and threw the truck in drive. I needed some sleep.