February 14, 2011
10:12 AM

"Ide, if you work on Valentine's Day, how're you gonna get a love life?"

"Ha ha, funny."

Matsuda and Ide were sitting in the NPA building's lounge while eating donuts and discussing their love lives. Normally they would have been working at that time, but, concerning their current case, there wasn't anything to really work on or investigate: it had been determined on the scene that Misa Amane had committed suicide.

She really hadn't been able to live without Light, thought Matsuda to himself. Well, at least Ide doesn't have that problem.

"No, I'm serious!" he said out loud. "You should be at a bar or something looking for someone to become your girlfriend... or something."

Ide snorted. "That sentence sounded twisted coming out if your mouth. Besides, don't you have the same problem? I've never seen you with a woman before..."

Matsuda scowled. "Oh, shut up."

"Can't get over Yagami's daughter, eh?"

"Ide, I said SHUT UP."

"Well, at least she isn't dead..."

"I--" Matsuda was about to shout a retort, but then it registered what Ide meant by that. Amane was dead; Sayu wasn't. But at this point he didn't think she would end up killing herself over her brother. "...Isn't it funny that Kira's victim list is still growing?" he said softly, changing the subject.

"Um, actually, I don't think that's funny at all..."

"...Okay, so maybe 'funny' was a poor choice of an adjective. But come on, you know what I mean!"

"Hey, Matsuda?"

The two detectives were interrupted by Yamamoto.

"What is it?" Matsuda asked. "You haven't reconsidered my offer to go drinking again, have you??" he teased.

"No, this is serious," Yamamoto said without smiling.

Matsuda stopped wisecracking immediately. "Well then?"

"Do you... um..."

"Come on, spit it out!" Matsuda snapped.

"Well... do you know any hobos?"

Ide and Matsuda turned and looked at each other at the same time. They both burst out laughing. "You're--you're--you're kidding!" managed Ide.

"Guys!! I'm serious!!"

"I--don't--know--any--hobos!!" Matsuda gasped.

"Why the hell would Matsuda know any hobos?!" Ide said, grinning. "And for that matter, why the hell are you asking?!"

"Well, um, one of the guys that I interviewed for a witness' statement said he knew Matsuda, and he looked kinda like a hobo..."

Matsuda finally managed to stop laughing. "So, what'd he look like? Was he really dirty or something?"

Yamamoto had to think about that for a moment. "Well, he... I guess... no."

"No... what?"

"He wasn't dirty, but he reminded me of a hobo."

"How so?" Ide asked curiously. "What, this guy was a clean hobo or something...?"

Both he and Matsuda cracked up again.

"GUYS!! He had really messed-up black hair, ginormous lines under his eyes, and looked really pale, like he, um, I dunno, lives in a subway tunnel where there's no light."

Both Ide and Matsuda were confused. The description sounded vaguely familiar to both of them, but they couldn't quite place it. "Was he really that pale?" asked Matsuda.

"Like you wouldn't believe! My next best theory to him being a hobo is him being a zombie, but of course that's ridiculous.. Or maybe not a zombie... maybe he's just some kind of extreme insomniac..."

Ide remained confused, but that triggered something in Matsuda's head. I know it's impossible... But it's such a weird coincidence... "What did he say his name was?"

"Ryuzaki."

Oh snap.

"No last name?!" Matsuda squeaked.

"Nope. I even double checked with him, he definitely... Matsuda, are you okay??"

"I could swear that all the blood in your head just visibly drained from your face!" Ide said, worried.

"I'm... I'm fine," Matsuda lied. Ide hasn't made the connection yet... Then again, he didn't know L nearly as long as I did. But I... It's impossible! This could all be a giant coincidence... No, not could! It has to be!!

Because L... L is...!!

"Was there anything else about him that was... weird??" he questioned.

"Like, um, what?"

"Eating habits," Matsuda said bluntly. "Sitting position. Using percentages. I don't know, anything!!"

Yamamoto looked at him like he was either in awe or thought Matsuda had gone completely insane. Probably the latter. "Oh my God... You DO know him, don't you?!"

It was awe.

"Just answer the damn question!" Ide snapped.

The awe disappeared. "Well, he devoured the entire bowl of candy on the desk, he used percentages at least once, and he sat something like... uh, this?" Yamamoto crouched in a chair to demonstrate. "Does that answer your...?"

Matsuda didn't even hear the rest of the question. The next thing he knew he was lying on the floor, Ide was yelling at him, and everyone in the room was looking down at him.

"WHAT THE HELL--Oh, thank God, you came to!! Let him breath, people!!"

"What-what ha-happened...??" Matsuda gasped.

Aizawa was standing behind Ide. "Matsuda, you idiot!! You passed out and scared the hell out of everyone!!"

Oh, so that's why he was on the floor. "And they called you in...?"

"Who, the Chief?" Yamamoto asked, referring to Aizawa. "No, he just, um, happened to be walking by..."

"What the hell happened??" Aizawa continued. "Is somebody dead??"

Funny he should ask that.

"N-n-no..."

Slowly Matsuda stood up.

"It's more like somebody's been brought back to life."

AN: Hah! Matsuda fainted!! O.O There, that oughtta satisfy some of you for a while.

PLEASE REVIEW!!!! I am super close to getting 100!!!!!! YAY!! (It's not as many as "Art of Drowning", but hey, I'm not complaining!!)