I hate the ending. Sorry it's bad.

Okay, please note that the first part is going into minimal detail on Castiel's distress because Michael blocks everything out. There will be later times where I might go more in depth but I'll make sure to warn because it might be distressing if I write it well (not a likely scenario). Also, Castiel's psychologist is a nice man, he's great and he's very good at what he does. Castiel simply hates doctors and he hates strangers and he hates being touched and basically he does not like his appointments and wishes he didn't have to have them so that is why he gets so upset. The doctor is not abusive or evil.

Okay, enjoy the chapter.

Michael had his head bowed onto his hands, eyes squeezed shut tightly as if the action could somehow take him somewhere else. Beside him Castiel was curled into a ball, fists pressed into his eyes, shaking his head slightly. Michael recognised the sign of 'I don't want to be here, take me home' but ignored it. It wasn't like he could unload this responsibility onto someone else.

Lucifer would be willing but his fierce protectiveness might push him to hit the doctor... again. Michael did not need to pick up his brother's bail for another assault charge after the last one forced them to move to Lawrence. He didn't want to pack up and leave again.

And it wasn't like he could ask their mother – he used that term fairly loosely. She hadn't been their mother since she dried to drown Castiel in a bathtub. Michael would never, ever forgive her for it.

He shuddered, remembering the screams he and Lucifer heard when they arrived home from school. It was clearly Castiel – those were the sounds he made when someone touched him – and something was very, very wrong. He had sprinted upstairs, his twin right behind him. They had been just in time. Castiel had screamed more when Michael wrestled him from their mother's hands while Lucifer grabbed her. They had had to knock her out and call the police and an ambulance.

Castiel flinched every time someone approached him for the next two months.

Michael hated nobody more than he hated his own mother. Becoming Castiel's legal guardian was the best decision he'd ever made. And thank god their mother was barely at home and when she was she holed up in her room and left only for food.

But that meant that the responsibility of bringing Castiel to his appointments with the autism specialist in Kansas City fell to him. He always liked to forcefully drag one of the others along so he could have some support but he couldn't very well deny Gabriel the right to spend a Friday afternoon with friends. He hadn't had a friend in so long and though that kid appeared a little rough around the edges, he seemed like he genuinely liked Gabriel and for that Michael was grateful. He didn't want Gabriel turning into him; one emotionally unstable and antisocial member of their family was enough.

Unfortunately it meant trying to calm Castiel was his job alone tonight.

"Castiel," Michael finally murmured, turning his head and opening his eyes. Castiel didn't respond except to rock more frantically. "Hey, it's going to be alright. I know you hate this, believe me, I do too. But it's going to be okay."

Michael wished he didn't have to do this.

He flinched when Castiel did as the doctor called his name.

"Come on, Castiel," he murmured. It was times like this he wished he could hold Castiel's hand like he did for Anna when she had to get needles. After several moments of silent protest where Castiel rocked faster and shook his head violently Michael, very uncharacteristically, snapped his younger brother's name.

Castiel froze, probably in shock. Michael never yelled at him. He was always patient to the extreme but today was not a good day. He had to deal with this one his own. He was tired. He was frustrated. And he just wanted to go home and take an hour long, scalding shower before drinking half of the whiskey he has hidden in his bedside table.

Castiel finally got up and shuffled towards the room with Michael behind him, regretting his shortness with Castiel.

"I'm sorry," he whispered when they sat.

Castiel was working himself into a panic and the doctor hadn't even spoken yet. When he did speak the small boy whimpered and curled into the foetal position on his chair. Michael was asked the usual questions about how Castiel was doing coupled with newer ones about how he was coping at school.

When it finally came time for the doctor to turn his attentions on Castiel he was crying and shaking his head. Sometimes Michael couldn't understand it.

Dr Albert was one of the best in his field and he had never done anything untoward to his brother but for some reason he terrified Castiel and it was worse for him to be touched by the psychologist than by anybody else except their mother.

Michael grit his teeth and shut his eyes, trying to block out Castiel's cries of fear.

Soon it was over though and he was able to lead his shaking, sobbing brother back out, pay for the visit and head towards the car, promising Castiel anything he wanted for being so brave. Michael was just going through the motions however, his nerves were completely frayed. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep doing this every week.

It was with great relief that he looked up and noticed Lucifer leaning on the driver's side of his car.

"How did you get here?" Michael questioned.

"A bus," Lucifer replied, quirking an eyebrow to note that it was a stupid question. "Come on, bro, you look exhausted. Keys."

Lucifer snatched the keys the second they were in sight and ushered both his brothers into the car, crooning softly to Castiel as he pulled his seatbelt on without touching him.

They stopped at a diner for dinner because Castiel enjoyed burgers and he seemed to calm down when he was huddled between the corner of the booth and Lucifer, sipping a strawberry milkshake and eating his burger and fries.

"Thank you," Michael said softly, looking at Lucifer who tore his eyes away from Castiel.

"Not a problem. I checked on Anna and Gabe before I came and they're both being good little munchkins," Lucifer smiled cheerily. Michael nodded. "You know, you could have called, I would have come with you."

"I had to get going. Gabriel was supposed to but I wanted him to have the chance to spend time with his friend," Michael explained. "I can't remember the last time he or Anna had friends. Can you?"

Lucifer shook his head, looking sad. "It's always been just us."

They finished dinner in silence and then Lucifer drove them home. Michael allowed him to take Castiel through his night time routine, sneaking to his room without any of his siblings noticing. He had just finished showering and was heading out to lock his door so he could drink undisturbed when he spotted Lucifer perched on his bed, toying with his bottle of whiskey.

"You said you'd stopped," Lucifer commented dryly. "Cassie went to bed okay, I think he'll be alright. You should go to bed too."

Michael glowered. "Are you really going to deny me a drink?"

"Yes. It's not the way to deal with this." Lucifer scowled at him. "That's why there isn't supposed to be any in the house. Mum was drinking before she tried to... you know."

Michael shivered. "Are you comparing me to her?"

"Of course not. But this isn't healthy. I'm tipping it down the sink. Don't buy anymore."

Michael glared as his brother left before flopping on his bed, body aching as a physical representation of his mental exhaustion.

"Is he alright?" Gabriel wondered, sneaking up behind Lucifer to watch him pour the mostly full bottle of whiskey down the sink. He took comfort in the fact that there was barely two inches emptied when he found it. It meant Michael hadn't had it long. His brother didn't have a drinking problem by any means but Lucifer worried that if he used alcohol to cope with his stress then it could turn into one. So they promised long ago that neither of them would drink their problems.

"Yeah. He just needs a kick in the ass sometimes like anybody," Lucifer replied.

"I would have gone but-"

"You hate it as much as he does. Michael's not mad, Gabe, he's actually happy you've made friends for a change." Lucifer turned to smile at his younger brother who looked guilty as all hell. "What's his name?"

"Dean Winchester," Gabriel replied. "He's got a little brother Sam. They're great."

Lucifer nodded. "Don't be up too late. I'll see you in the morning." He ruffled Gabriel's hair on the way past to go to his own room and stayed awake most of the night in case Michael ended up sneaking out to find their cooking wine or something if he was desperate.

On Monday Dean decided he wanted to sit with Gabriel at lunch. He knew that meant risking the wrath of Gordon and Crowley, which also meant he'd end up on the radar of their other friends Azazel and Alistair so he was little uncertain. He just really didn't want Gabriel to think he was ashamed of being his friend or something, as girly as that sounded. He was a good guy and Dean liked him.

He didn't tell Gabriel just in case he chickened out and let the guy leave before him for the cafeteria. So he was on his own when he wandered past and open classroom and a flash of tan caught his eye.

Dean backtracked and looked back into the open classroom to see Castiel sitting alone at his desk, evidently still waiting for Anna since Gabriel had gone ahead to the cafeteria to meet them. Dean frowned deeply, it was more than unusual for Castiel's siblings to forget him or leave him waiting so he stepped inside slowly.

"Castiel," he said to alert the boy to his presence. He didn't even react. "Hi, Castiel, I'm Dean, a friend of Gabriel's. What are you doing in here?" Dean inwardly cursed, of course there would be no answer, Castiel didn't talk.

"I know Anna is supposed to meet you but... something must be holding her up. So, Castiel... hey, do you mind if I call you 'Cas'? It's sort of easier than Castiel." Dean waited, knowing it was stupid to expect a reply. "I'll take your silence as a yes. Okay, then, Cas, why don't you come with me and I'll take you to Gabe?"

Dean was surprised when Castiel pushed away from his desk and stood, eyes flicking up to Dean's face momentarily before travelling down his body to his shoes slowly, as if memorising him. Dean had seen him do it once with a teacher. He took it as a good sign and smiled warmly when Castiel's eyes went to his face once more as he put his backpack on and prepared to walk with Dean.

"I'm sure Anna didn't forget you, she probably had things to take care of," Dean said cheerfully as he walked towards the cafeteria with Castiel in step behind him, close enough to be able to follow Dean without being separated or jostled by someone walking past them but far enough away that there was no risk of Dean touching him. Dean found it incredible how Castiel oriented himself so easily around everyone for his own comfort. "I mean, it would have been better if she'd shot your brother a text so he could come get you. Lucky I was passing, huh? Here we are and there's Gabe looking pretty worried. Let's go make him feel better."

Dean wasn't sure why he was just talking like this. He knew Castiel was never going to respond but... well, he didn't think it was right to ignore him just because he wouldn't say anything in return.

"Castiel!" Gabriel said, jumping to his feet. "God I was worried! Where's Anna?" This last part was directed at Dean.

"Hey Gabe, I think Anna must be getting held up somewhere," Dean said, pulling out a chair for Castiel to sit in. The youngest Novak took the offered seat opposite his brother and Dean sat down in the one beside him, smiling at him. "I found him waiting in his classroom and thought I should probably bring him to you."

Dean watched as Castiel pulled out his lunch and started to arrange it in front of him. He didn't understand the arrangement but found the look of concentration it seemed to require kind of endearing.

"Thank you," Gabriel sighed. "I was about to go into full-blown panic mode."

Dean chuckled.

"He didn't seem worried about someone else getting him?" Gabriel wondered, frowning a little.

"Nope," Dean responded cheerfully. "Me and Cas are friends now, right man?"

Castiel, of course, didn't say anything but he did pause in the laying out of carrot sticks on their cling wrap. He actually gave a small nod and both Dean and Gabriel stared at him. They gaped at each other and Dean went to speak but was interrupted by the appearance of an almost hysterical Anna.

"Gabriel! Castiel is missing!" she was shouting but froze when she spotted Castiel straightening his apple next to his sandwich. "Oh..." She flushed deep red before dropping down next to Gabriel and leaning towards her younger brother slightly. "Castiel, I'm so sorry. My teacher held me back. I won't do that to you again."

"It's okay, Dean got him," Gabriel assured her, rubbing her shoulder. "Next time remind your teacher that you have someone to take care of or ask if you can text me – or Dean for that matter – and we can get Cassie instead."

Anna nodded, looking devastated. She turned her beautiful eyes onto Dean.

"Thank you for taking care of him," she said with a genuine smile. Dean nodded. He wanted to speak but he felt eyes on him and turned to look over at his table where his entire group was staring at him.

"It's okay," Gabriel said, looking down at the table. "You can go back to sit with them."

"Uh..." Dean observed Gordon beckoning to him, looking furious. He wasn't sure if he should go or stay and was trying to make a decision when-

"Dean!" Sam skidded to a halt by their table, startling all of them except Castiel who had just started to eat and was apparently ignoring them. "Are we sitting here now?"

Dean looked up at his little brother, about to respond along the lines of 'we are not doing anything' but Sam was looking at Gabriel with this worshipful expression Dean had only ever seen directed at himself before and couldn't take away Sam's enthusiasm.

"Sure, Sammy, come and sit," Dean offered, trying not to feel a little jealous that Sam was so enamoured by Gabriel when he sat next to him rather than Dean. He said he was just in awe of Gabriel's intelligence and ambition but Dean could sense a little something else. He didn't want to ask about it since Sam was so young and probably didn't really want to think about what his sexual orientation might be so he just decided to let Sam have his hero-worship crush on Gabriel but thought it prudent to warn his friend of his younger brother's feelings so he was aware.

Dean felt eyes on him and found Castiel watching him. Castiel tilted his head and then looked at Sam chattering away to Gabriel as Anna watched him with a fond smile, seemingly having picked up on his crush the same way Dean had. Castiel tilted his head to the other side before returning to eating, unperturbed by the events. Dean smiled. He had no doubt Castiel wasn't sure what was actually going on but decided to adopt his attitude and not let it bother him.

Dean eyed Castiel's chocolate chip cookies that smelt really good – homemade no doubt.

"Hey Cas, since we're friends now... think I could have one of those?" Dean indicated the cookies and Anna turned to stare worriedly but Castiel simply slid one of the cookies towards Dean without any fuss.

"Thanks, man," Dean smiled, turning to Castiel's siblings to join in their conversation, ignoring the way they looked at him with deep gratitude etched onto their faces. He knew they were so glad that someone didn't care Castiel couldn't communicate and wanted to be around him anyway, but he didn't really want them to start gushing with thanks. Chick-flick moments were so not his thing. In fact they made him downright uncomfortable.

However nothing was said and they continued on as if it was totally normal – their oddly comprised grouping. Gabriel grinned every time Dean decided to include Castiel in the conversation despite his mute nature. Castiel surprised them all by spending the whole lunch hour watching Dean with what could almost be a bemused smile on his face, obviously not used to anybody talking to him so much or so normally. Sam caught on and Anna looked like she could kiss both Winchester boys, hugging Gabriel tightly as they all laughed at Dean's jokes, Castiel tilting his head, not understanding but entertained if his smile was any indicator.

Dean had seen enough to know Castiel's response wasn't normal but he didn't care. This was the first time he'd seen the kid look anything close to happy or engaged. Who cared if he probably thought Dean was nuts? He was happy that he was putting that tiny, almost unnoticeable smile on his face. He was someone who needed to feel like a protector so doing this small thing, making someone not feel miserable and alone, was just what he needed. No thanks required.