(A/N: I swear I've seen a big, green review button once before. Oh well, you guys get the idea: review please! And enjoy! Also, the third line down - the reason I had Scar say what he says outright is because obviously he knows Simba is joking, so it is more of a joke that Simba's meant to take in good humor - while Scar gets to say what he's always wanted to say.)

"Uncle Scar – you need to say 'hi' to my mom!" shouted Simba enthusiastically.

The brown furred lion, and the only lion of which had been sleeping in the back den, reluctantly looked up…only to see Sarafina in the spot, smiling nervously, where he had expected to have seen Sarabi.

"You just get stupider every day, don't you?" he asked Simba.

Simba giggled at Scar's comments while Sarafina frowned disapprovingly. Scar got up to his feet.

"Seriously, what happened? Did you knock your head on something?"

Sarafina smiled. Maybe she could lighten up the mood between her and Scar with a joke. "It's more like, he got out the right side of the wrong bed," she said.

Now that just confused Scar. Sarafina's cheapish smile disappeared.

"Me and…me and Sarabi swapped cubs for the day," she explained simply.

"Ah," Scar replied. "And you," he addressed, looking down on the smiling Simba, "think that makes Sarafina your mother?"

"Yeah!" replied Simba. He frowned. "Doesn't it?"

"No," Scar replied.

"Yes," Sarafina replied.

Simba's ears fell. "Oh," he commented.

"I said 'yes,' doesn't that count for anything, Simba?" asked Sarafina.

"No," replied Simba.

Scar grinned. "And why not?" he asked Simba.

"Because if a lion and a lioness have two different answers to the same question, your best bet is to listen to the lion," replied Simba as if he had recited many times before. Sarafina frowned.

"That's a good lad," replied Scar.

"Sorry Aunt Sarafina," said Simba, turning around, "Uncle Scar says you should be okay with that though, since you're used to being treated as an inferior species."

"Wha—!"

"Hey Simba," interrupted Scar. "When does two plus two equal five?"

"When a lioness does the math!" replied Simba enthusiastically.

"What has twelve legs and two and a half brains?"

"Two lions and one lioness!"

"That's quite enough!" Sarafina exclaimed suddenly.

"Aw, come on Aunt Saffy – we were just having fun."

"I don't care, Simba. You shouldn't make jokes like that. I'm sure your mother doesn't appreciate it."

"My mom doesn't know."

"Ah…so Sarafina's not your mom now, is she?" asked Scar.

Sarafina smirked. "Yes I am," she replied. Simba began to get worried. He had a feeling he knew what she meant. "Simba…if you make one more joke about lionesses," she said as she held up a claw for emphasis on the 'one,' "then I will punish you."

"How many lions does it take to bring down an elephant?" asked Scar.

"Scar, don't encourage him."

"But this one's really good," said Simba, chuckling.

"Don't answer it," cautioned Sarafina.

"But I want to."

"You'll be punished."

"But…but…" Simba stammered, but then he got an idea. "But I need the bathroom!" he shouted, running outside where he could answer it himself and Sarafina wouldn't hear him.

Sarafina smiled as he ran out, but then realized something. She turned around. She and Scar were the only two in the back den.

"So…uh…what's the answer?" asked Sarafina, just trying to break the awkwardness of the situation.

"None. It should be brought down before the lions get to it."

"Ah," replied Sarafina. "You know Scar, you really shouldn't be teaching him jokes like that at his age. You never know what he may grow up to believe."

"The truth?"

"Now be quiet."

"We have a joke for that too, you know. A lioness telling a lion what to do."

"I don't want to hear it," replied Sarafina.

"But it's a good one."

"I don't care." Sarafina sighed. "Please don't make this hard for me, Scar. Simba's a great cub and I don't want to…"

"Great? I don't see what's so great about him. He's just like any other ball of fluff around here."

"You'd better not mean my daughter," snapped Sarafina aggressively.

"Sarabi's daughter," Scar corrected her. "Where is the thing? I haven't seen her in a while." As casually as Scar spoke however, Sarafina had been able to get up onto all her feet and was now snarling at Scar with her claws erect.

"Don't you dare call my daughter a 'thing' or a 'ball of fluff.' She and Simba are both much greater lions than you could ever be."

"Well at least they're lions. Smart cubs too. I bet they know two plus two equals four. You, on the other hand, have seem to forgotten the simplest fact that Simba shouldn't be outside on his own."

Sarafina stopped snarling. Scar was right. Why was she still here? Keeping her eyes on Scar, she took a couple of steps backwards. Scar continued to just hold his evil smile. Finally, knowing she could now make her escape without Scar doing anything, Sarafina whirled around and headed outside, to look for the cub.

"So this is where Sarafina finds the time to keep her coat in good shape," Sarabi commented.

"Huh?" Nala asked.

Sarabi rolled over onto her back before she spoke again. "This is why Sarafina doesn't have bags under her eyes or fur pulled out of her head."

"What do you mean, Mom?" Nala asked.

"Are you seriously telling me," Sarabi asked as she closed her eyes in delight, "that all you do every morning is watch the sun come up with Sarafina?"

"Not all the time," replied Nala.

Sarabi sighed in delight. "I haven't done this ever since Simba's been born."

Nala chuckled. "What does the sunrise look like when you're upside-down?" she asked.

Sarabi opened her eyes to get a glimpse of the sun again. "I can't explain it," she replied. "Why don't you try it?"

Nala did so. She rolled over onto her back next to Sarabi and tried to tilt her head so she could see the sunrise. She frowned.

"I think it looks better the other way up," she said.

"Suit yourself then," replied Sarabi. "Watch it the normal way if you want."

Nala rolled back onto her front but then looked down at the ground, thinking of something else to do. "Can we go climb a tree?" she asked Sarabi excitedly.

"No," was Sarabi's simple reply, as her eyes were now shut again.

"Why not?"

"It's too dangerous."

"But Mo—eh…Aunt Sarafina always lets me do it."

Sarabi opened her eyes again. "She does?" she asked.

"Yeah!" Nala replied.

Sarabi rolled onto her front. "How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"Well…eh…you could go and find Sarafina…she'd tell you."

"Hmm," commented Sarabi. She wanted to keep the interaction between her and Sarafina, her and Simba, Sarafina and Nala, or Simba and Nala down to a minimal today. Perhaps there was a better way to do this. "What's the first rule about tree climbing?" she asked Nala.

"That's easy!" replied Nala. "Make sure the bark won't fall off as you climb, and that your claws are sharp enough."

"Rule number two?"

"Pick the branch out that you're aiming for and climb towards it."

"Rule number three?"

"Don't look down until you're at the branch."

"And how do you swing yourself over?"

"Arrive at the side of the branch and grab hold of it with one arm. Then, swing one of your back legs over and you should be fine from there!"

Nala finished, grinning from ear to ear. Sarabi was smiling too, but she was still uncertain.

"Hmm," she said. She caught sight of a small tree not too far from them. She got up. "Come on then, let's see you practice."

Nala hurriedly got to her feet and sprung all the way over to the tree, quickly jumping and grabbing hold of the bark with her claws, before pulling herself up step by step and swinging herself over the lowest branch, even before Sarabi had arrived at the tree.

Nala grinned and looked back over at Sarabi. Her face fell a little bit when she saw the expression on Sarabi's face.

"Nala. Experienced or not I want to be under the tree when you climb, ready to catch you, okay? Don't go running off and up one of those things like that again."

"Yes Ma'am," replied Nala, with her eyes pointing downwards.

"Now," continued Sarabi, with her tone a little lighter, "Nala, I must say that was pretty good. Better than Simba can do."

Nala giggled. "I know! When Aunt Sarafina takes care of us, she lets us climb, and Simba's just terrible!"

"Sarafina lets Simba climb trees?" asked Sarabi.

"Oh," replied Nala. Her ears fell flat. "You…you didn't know…did you?"

"How often does she let him do it?"

"Fairly often. Once every three days, I'd say."

"Huh," replied Sarabi. She then began walking up closer towards the tree. Nala was a little confused. She jumped down onto the ground in one leap. She really hadn't been that high up.

"Are you just being nice to me?" asked Nala.

"What do you mean?" asked Sarabi back, although really she already found it amusing: she knew exactly what Nala meant.

"Well…you just don't seem as strict as what Simba says you are."

"What's the sun doing, Nala?" asked Sarabi.

"Um…rising?"

"And have I not corrected you already on not calling me 'mother,' leaving the cave without me, and climbing a tree without my presence?"

"Yeah."

Sarabi laughed again. "I'd say I'm doing my job, Nala. I don't punish Simba every second of every day, though it would probably be better if I did. We've still got a whole day left ahead of us! Talking of which, what would you like to do now?"

"Climb a bigger tree!" Nala replied enthusiastically. She'd been waiting for Sarabi to ask that.

Sarabi rolled her eyes. "Go on then. Pick a tree."

"I've already picked one," replied Nala. "Yesterday I picked it. It's a bit of a walk from here though."

"Doesn't bother me any," said Sarabi. "Lead the way Nala. Let's find this big tree."

Nala led off quite merrily with Sarabi behind her. So far, their day was going fairly smoothly.

(A/N: That's probably not the last we'll see of Scar. I know I'm planning on bringing Rafiki and Mufasa into this story later too. We'll see how it goes. Review please!)