Sonic's Last Bet
All the characters have fun differently. What happens when someone bets that they couldn't have fun with every other member of the gang and still keep their sanity? Insanity, thats what!
All you who read and know, bow before my holiness. Just kidding! Enjoy the chapter!
I don't own my own ass, much less Sonic. If I did own Sonic, this is the kind of stuff that would happen to Sonic on a daily basis. "Thank you Sega for owning me, and not selling me to Radman! Thank you!"
The spelling errors in this chapter are intentional. Most of them. I swear. No, really.
Lots of notes. I'm starting to make it a practice to appear in every chapter. I mean, Shadow get's mentioned in every chapter, and I've only been doing this since Jet's chapter, I deserve a little spotlight too! And it makes for some really bad gags.
I do not own any meaninful ideas. It's true.
I do not own Star Wars, StarCraft, or Weird Al. I do not own Dr. Who. (I just had to do a Dr. Who crossover). And I don't over a TARDIS. I do own a delorean though, and I do actually own Sonic 06. Yes, I was one of those poor people cheated out of their money by Sega. CURSE YOU SEGA! CURSE YOU! -Waves a picture of Shadow in my face- Ah... -drools- "So... awesome!!" GASP! I ONLY PUT FIVE EXCLAMATION POINTS! THE WORLD MUST END!
-BOOM!-
I do not own your soul. I'm sure some of you would be more than happy to give it to me though ;)
When I write a word, and it's followed by (?), even I'm not sure how it is physically possible.
Thank you to Jarkes for supplying the character for this chapter. All gags in this chapter are either mine, or borrowed from Silvs chap in "How to tick off..."
Chapter 8: Silver
For some reason, even though Sonic and Knuckles now had a couch, Sonic was still sleeping on the floor. Once everybody had left the party, the chickens had started attacking again, and they had stayed up all night fending off the terrible breasts- I mean beasts! (You can't tell what I'm thinking about at all, can you? O.o) They were both covered in enough feathers that they would have made very convincing crappy anthro birds. This time, it was Sonic's turn to drink all the coffee. If I'm going to get up first, I might as well get the first coffee! Then, he heard the door open. He looked to see who had come in, but saw nobody.
"Woo! I am the ghost of Tails! Woo!" The sheet covered figure who stood next to him said all ghosty-like.
"C'mon Charmy, knock it off! We don't have time for your shenanegans!" Sonic said as he pulled of the sheet to reveal empty air. He jumped and dropped the overly large sheet that belonged on a king sized beg back onto the petite figure.
"WoO! Woo! wOO! WOo!" Tails said. Knuckles was already down.
"I always wondered how Tails capitalised random letters of his speech... What do you wish foul spirit!" Sonic replied.
"I have returned to get my ultimate revenge! Woo! First I will kill my murderer, Shadow! Then I will spend an entire day eating clams! Finally, I will annoy you for all eternity!!" One guess how Sonic replied.
"NO!! Wait a minute... Shadow can't die, why do I care if you eat clams and get bloated, and I would die of old age before an eternity had gone by anyways."
"FOOL! Uh... I will kill Shadow anyways! And this ghostly body is not allergic to shellfish, so I can eat as many clams as I like!" Tails replied.
"Oh, okay. NO!!"
"Sonic, how come every time you do that, you manage to put even more exclamation points on the end of the word?" Knuckles said.
"I... I don't know... it always just sort of... happened." Sonic said.
"Well this is just great! Tails is back, and now he's not allergic to shellfish, so we don't have anything we can repel him with!"
"We've got to figure out some way to get rid of him permenantly!" Just then, a white hedgehog fell to the ground from a portal which popped up in the middle of their house.
"Hey chicken butt!" Tails screamed, apparently back to his normal self.
"Hey albino freak, why are you back?" Sonic said.
"Iblis trigger, I have come to repair the future!" Silver said in his whiny, high voice.
"Not again! This is the fourth time!" Sonic screamed.
"You're just in time. Sonic needs to entertain you for a day."
"How about this, Sonic, if you help me repair the future, I'll agree that I had fun."
"Agreed. I wouldn't want you screwing the future up anyways. Which you always do."
"Right. Any questions before we begin?" Silver said.
"It might be nice to know how the future is damaged so I can figure out how we might be able to fix it." Sonic said dryly.
"Alright. When Shadow killed Tails, Tails became immortal by becoming a ghost." Knuckles interrupted by saying,
"I don't believe in ghosts you hippy!"
"One of your boss fights involves nothing but a giant evil ghost thing with a gay looking rainbow tongue, retard!" Sonic screeched.
"Oh. I still don't believe in ghosts."
"THEN WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK TAILS IS, YOUR MOM? HE'S A GHOST YOU CENSORED RETARD!!InsertRandomWordsHere!!" Sonic yelled so loud that Professor Gerald somehow heard him as he was creating Shadow over fifty years ago,in Space Colony ARK.
"I still don't believe in ghosts."
"It doesn't really matter whether you do or not, since it is me and Sonic that have to do all the work anyways." Silver interjected. "Now, as I was saying... Tails became immortal by becoming a ghost. Somewhere in time, he found a cloning machine, and made millions of copies of himself. Now, in the future, we are plagued by millions of invincible copies of THAT retard!" He said, his finger shakily pointing at Tails.
"So what do we do?" Sonic said.
"The way I see it, we have three options. Option number one: we go back in time and prevent Tails from being born/kill him in early life. Problem: if he ever saved someone's life, or contributed something essential to an adventure or a plan, etc, that contribution would be erased from existance, and you might not have stopped Robotnik in the new future."
"Ouch. Not liking option number one." Sonic replied.
"Alright then, Option number two: prevent Shadow from killing Tails, so that he never becomes a ghost, and in the future, all his clones will be destructable."
"Wouldn't they just turn into ghosts after you kill them?"Knuckles interrupted.
"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, problems: the clones may then turn into ghosts, but at least then we'll be no worse off than before!"
"True. What's the third option?"
"Well, we could also go to the future, and prevent Tails from reaching the cloning machine, either by destroying it, or by some other means. Problems: that's not the only cloning machine in the world, and he would still be there and immortal, and one indestructable Tails is one too many!"
"I agree whole heartedly. We should do a combination of number two and number three. Stop him from becoming indestructable, and destroy the cloning machine just to make sure!"
"Can we get some hamburgers? NO MAYO, OR YOU DIE!" Tails blurted.
"I rest my case. Only a crazy person doesn't like mayo!" Silver said.
"Alright, let's do it!"
"Uh... we need to either find a delorean, or get two Chaos Emeralds."
"Both of you guys are retarded, all we need is a TARDIS!"
"What the HELL is a TARDIS?" Silver asked.
"A method of time travel." Knuckles replied.
"How are we supposed to find one of those?" Sonic said.
"Easy, I'll just call up Dr. Who, and he'll take us whereever we need to go."
"Just who is Doctor Who?"
"That's exactly who he is! He's Dr. Who!" Knuckles replied.
"Thanks Knuckles, that explains everything!" Silver said.
"No it doesn't, it doesn't explain why you exist!" Knuckles countered.
"I'm a meaninful and unique character who has an established place within the Sonic community!" Silver whined in reply.
"Name on meaningful thing, one unique thing, and one established thing about you?"
"Uh... I have meaning in my valiant quest!"
"Gay back to the future rip off. Please, continue."
"Um... I'm unique in that I have my psychokinesis, and I'm... uh... grey?"
"Rip off jedi power, stupid fur color."
"I'm established in a bunch of games."
"Crappy 360 game that nobody bought, two worthless PSP games, and a sequel to the worst Sonic racing SPINOFF to ever grace the Wii, and all of the sudden you're an established characer?"
"Alright guys, the doctor is here."
"Greetings. I have heard that you required assistance in reaching a point in time. Where is it that you need to go?"
"About... two days ago." Sonic said.
"I see. Step here please." Dr. Who said, as he montioned them to the TARDIS. Once they had stepped in, they dissapeared from that time, and appeared two days ago.
"Stop, Shadow, don't do it!" The second Sonic said.
"Hey me, what are you- I mean what am I doing here?" That time's Sonic said.
"I don't know, you tell me!" The future's Sonic said.
"PARADOX!" Knuckles the future Knuckles screamed.
"Right... you're all CENSORED freaks, so let me remind you that you are holding Rouge for ransom. Let me take my girlfriend and-" Shadow covered his mouth with his hands, but the words were already out. Simultaneously, both Sonics pointed a finger at him and started lauging in unision. Also in unision, both Knuckles' said
"It wasn't that funny."
"Just- Argh! For the love of- Oh, never mind, you're probably hiding her in this painfully obvious closet, marked with 'We are hiding Rouge here, you will never find her.' What genius thought of that?" Shadow said.
"I did!" both Sonic's said.
"Right. I'm outta here." Shadow then ran off with Rouge, bridal style,
"Our mission is complete." Silver said.
"So now what do we do?" Knuckles asked.
"Oh! Silver and I still have to have fun!" Sonic said.
"I know, let's do something where I have a ridiculous advantage over you do to my powers!"
"Well, it won't be spelling, cause you just misspelled 'due' in SPEECH! I didn't even know that it was possible to misspell stuf while you are taking!"
"Shut up!"
"Besides, you agreed that if I helped save the future, you would agree that you had fun!"
"But I wanna do something fun anyways!"
SILENCE! I grow tired of listening to you...
"But, you're in control. You could make us stop being annoying at any time."
SILENCE! Your miniscule brain is not capable of comprehending my greatness! I provided you with a couch, and this is how you repay me?
"We bought the couch. There's nothing you did to give it to us."
SILENCE! I gave you the Holy Couch of Antioch. Tis not my fault if thou is incapable of fending off one measely chicken!
"Are you ever going to stop justifing yourself and actually do something worthwhile?"
SILENCE! Like capping you and Silver, and Knuckles, and Tails, and..."
"Hey, while he's distracted with the stupidly long list of characters, let's make a run for it!"and so, Sonic, Silver, Knuckles, Dr. Who, Tails, Cream, Amy, Eggman, Metal Sonic, Big the Cat, Mighty, Chris Gayhead, Shadow, Rouge, Black Doom, the President, the President's Secretary, Marine, Gamma, Omega, Froggy, Cheese, Chocola, Amy, Dark Oak, Chris' Dad, Chris' Mom, Emerl, Gemerl, Vector, Charmy, Espio, Jim Raynor, Luke Skywalker, Weird Al, Blaze, Black Doom, Mephiles, Princess Elise, Werewolf Sonic, Scourge, Princess Sally, Bunny Rabbot, Rotor, that one french dude, the Babylon Rogues, the baby Rouge was pregnant with O.o, and Ray the Flying Squirrel all jammed into the TARDIS and went home. I'm sure that some obscure characters were left behind, but I can assure you... NOBODY CARED!