Disclaimer: Don't own Tekken at all.
Chapter 4: Oh No, Not an Infomercial
The camera zooms into the arena and onto the stage where The X Factor and Steve Fox are. The two seems to be fine after the ordeal with Julia, so they came back to the studio after escaping her wrath.
X Factor: What up, my peeps? Welcome to another episode of Who Wants to be a Millionaire. I abandoned the voting idea because no one voted or sent me questions for that matter. Anyway, I'm here with Steve Fox, and he is the only contestant to come this far in the game. Alright Steve, are you ready to try to win 8,000 dollars?
Steve: Hell yeah I am, guv. Let's do it.
The music plays and the lights dim. After that, the power goes off as well.
X Factor: What, what's going on?
The lights come back on.
X Factor: The hell was that for?
His broadcast is shut off and some sort of program is put in its place. It appears to be an infomercial.
The camera zooms around the room of a house. It seems to be the Kazama-Mishima residence. The camera focuses on one called Kazuya Mishima. On the table in front of him, it appears to be some sort of a popcorn maker.
Kazuya: Hey folks, Kazuya Mishima here with the Quick Pop Popcorn Popper.
Jin, who happened to be sitting on the couch with his friends, gets up and approaches his dad.
Jin: Hey dad, how does it work?
Kazuya: It's simple, boy. You just plug it in.
He plugs it in.
Kazuya: Open the butter packet.
He tries to open it but has problems. He laughs nervously to the camera.
Kazuya: Hey guys sorry about that. I just couldn't get it open, you know?
Take 2.
Kazuya: Hey folks Kazuya Mishima here with the Quick Pop Popcorn Popper.
Jin approaches his dad from the couch.
Jin: Hey Dad, how does it work?
Kazuya: It's simple boy, you just plug it in.
He plugs it in again.
Kazuya: Open the butter packet.
Kazuya tries and fails again. He mutters swear words under his breath.
Kazuya: You know when I do a trailer for a new Tekken game, all I had to do was look good and kick people's asses. I never had to open a butter packet.
Take 3 (Kazuya is still having trouble).
Kazuya: Fucking butter packet. Is this vacuum sealed or what?
He is struggling to get it open with his fingers.
Kazuya: This is fucking bullshit.
He gnaws at it with his teeth, trying to tear it and fails. He's pissed now.
Kazuya: AARGHH!!
He slams the packet on the ground.
Take 4.
Kazuya: It's simple boy, you just plug it in.
He plugs it in, but he starts to get electrocuted, at least his arm is. Kazuya is screaming in pain as his arm is flash fried. His arm is covered in black spots and dried blood.
Kazuya: I can smell my arm flesh cooking. IT'S LIKE I'VE BEEN NAPALMED!! AARRGH!!
Jin: Put some butter on it.
Kazuya: I can't put some butter on. I can't get the butter packet open. ASSWIPE!!
He throws the packet at Jin and hits him with a left hook (his right arm get fried).
Take 5.
Kazuya: Let's finish this goddamn commercial. If I find out who's responsible for booking me on this, I'M GONNA KICK 'EM IN THE ASS!!
He turns to the camera.
Kazuya: Hey folks, Kazuya Mishima here with the Quick Pop Popcorn Popper. It's simple, boy.
Jin: I didn't say it y—
Kazuya: GO FUCK YOURSELF!!
Take 5.
Jin: Hey Dad, how does it work?
Kazuya: It's simple boy, you just plug it in.
He hands the plug to Jin.
Kazuya: Go ahead, plug it in.
Jin plugs it in. The two flinch in case of any shock therapy that could be given out.
Kazuya: Open the butter packet
Jin rips it open. Kazuya is irritated.
Kazuya: Pour it in.
Jin does so and closes the lid to it.
Kazuya: And in ten seconds, you have enough popcorn for the whole game. HehHeh!
Kazuya goes in to get a whiff of it.
Kazuya: It smells so good.
He opens the hatchet at the top of the lid and gets he face attacked with steam.
Kazuya: AARRGH!! It's melting!!
He turns to Jin and his friends, who are laughing hard as hell.
Kazuya: What's so funny guys? Huh? You want a face full of hot buttery popcorn? Is that what you want?
Kazuya tries to lift the machine up, but the handles are hot.
Kazuya: AARRRGH!! SHIT!!
It cuts off. Apparently, The X Factor and Steve have re wired the camera and audio.
X Factor: Who the fuck put an infomercial in place of my show?
Julia comes out to the stage with tools and such.
X Factor: YOU!!
Julia: That's right, that's what you get for making fun of me.
Steve: I'm gonna bust a cap in yo ass, bitch.
X Factor: Don't ever say that again.
Steve: Chill homie. Take this.
He gives The X Factor an AK-47. Steve has an Uzi of his own.
Steve: KILL THE HOE!!
They give chase while Julia screams and runs for her life. The two shoot at her and keep missing by inches.
X Factor: Join us next time as Steve will go for 8,000 dollars. Send questions that I could ask him. DIE YOU TREE HUGGING BITCH!!
(Fades to Black)