A/N: Well I'm still not 100% sure on this chapter, so let me know what you think. It helps, massively. Secondly, thank you for all the reviews and alerts; they're dead useful so thank you all greatly :) Also, apologies for typos and OOC-ness – I'm working on fixing both. And as always, I own nothing but greatly appreciate you reading, reviewing and enjoying :)

-StB-

"And finally, the sugar to his spice, we have Miss Rachel Berry in place to play Lola." Scattered applause rings around the otherwise empty stage and Jesse cranes his neck to scan for Rachel, desperate to just see her face. He notices she's changed out his shirt – he doesn't really blame her – but what he doesn't know is that she's folded it up neatly and secured it under her pillow. She's sat directly opposite him but Esmeralda – their stage hand and the woman in charge of introducing each actor – in blocking his view. He can tell she's avoiding his eye line but she can't do so forever – they're both aware they have only four scenes to rehearse before their first one together. "Now if we could have Ricardo – yes, Jimmy, that's you – and Lola aside for a second, Paulo wants some pictures for the press."

Jesse loses her again as she's whisked off into a side room with Jimmy Kendal, the perfect definition of a Lima Loser. Jesse wouldn't usually care, but this is the guy Rachel has to act intimately with and he can't help but feel jealous that he won't be the one touching Rachel night after night. Especially when it wasn't Jimmy she went to when she need that answer. Jesse's given Rachel's actions much thought and has narrowed her decision to choose him down to three factors: one, no one else was available. Two – and he's a tad arrogant here – she knew she'd get a more than satisfactory answer from him and three, she still feels something for him and even if that's hate, Jesse swears that has to be better than nothing. Any which way, the point remains true; he now has something of hers he didn't have before – her trust. But like her virginity, he knows he can only lose it once and now he's got it, he's going to try his damndest not to lose it. Or her.

-StB-

"Okay everybody, take ten. There's lunch out back or pop round the corner to Lizzie's and she'll whack you out a discount – your choice. Just be back by two, ladies and gentlemen, rehearsals wait for no man."

Jesse stifles a laugh as Esmeralda – as vibrant as her name – conducts herself around the stage with the most high-energy arm actions he's ever seen used in a speech. He can't help but think she (not so) secretly wants to be a part of this world of jazz hands and leave behind the world of stage hands. He chuckles softly and shakes his head, deciding he'll grab an apple from out back and take it to his dressing room. Only four of the cast have dressing rooms: himself, Rachel, Jimmy and Cara, with the rest doubling up or sharing between as many as five or six. It's a large cry from the life he leads at UCLA but it makes him feel a certain closeness with everyone that he doesn't really experience there. It reminds him of his Vocal Adrenaline days and he can't help but feel a little nostalgic. And he decides that's going to be his excuse if Rachel doesn't accept what happened between them soon: he'll brush it off as nostalgia and she can pretend it never happened and that way, her reputation is kept in tact and his pride isn't dented. But he hopes it won't come to that and when he sees Rachel already stood in his dressing room, he dares to imagine things are looking up.

"I think we need to talk." Ever obsessed with practicality, she waits for his reply but he merely nods, deposits the apple and moves towards her as she stands with her back to the mirror. He inwardly cringes as he remembers he's already moved the photo of them from the bottom right corner to near the top arch on the left. He slips his hands around her body, joining them at the small of her back and over the top of his shoulder he can see she's added another message to his mirror. I know so.

"If you're not careful, I'm going to have to come and use your mirror to get ready in," he gestures to her message and she emits a little giggle. Her laugh makes his stomach jolt inadvertently and he doesn't like how he can't control what she does to him. He goes to leave a soft kiss on the lips that affect him so, but she pulls away, undoing his hands at the same time.

"We need to talk, Jesse, not-"

"Kiss?" His contribution is less than helpful but it still makes her smile. He raises his hands in defeat, a look of innocence replaying the one previous. "Talk away; you should be good at that."

She sighs and he can tell she's working hard not to smile again. He infuriates her because she knows he's right and the fact that his intelligence allows him to be privy to such information only makes him want to infuriate her further. Because as last night proved, Rachel Berry will always surprise you.

"Listen, you helped me in my-"

"Quest for sexual experience?" Her eyes hold an exasperated yet slightly amused shine and he can almost hear her sighing his name in vexation.

"Hour of need," she corrects him with a slight shake of her head, "And I'm grateful and enlightened and all of those things, and more. But Jesse-"

He doesn't want her to carry on. 'But Jesse' can never mean something good and it's a phrase that's plagued him his whole life.

"I can't forget everything that's happened, even now. And I can't forget last night either – not that I'd want to – but when this is all over, you're headed back to UCLA and I'll just be another girl you won't even remember."

He knows she's just trying to protect herself from him because she still thinks he's dangerous, and he supposes it's with good reason. But how she can think she'll ever be 'just another girl' is beyond him.

"How many other girls can you remember from New Directions, Jesse?" It's as if she's read his thoughts. He falters and doesn't respond. "Exactly."

"But not all of them-"

"Not all them what, Jesse?" He wants to say are you, but it's far too clichéd and he's decidedly not travelling that route. "Not all them jump into bed with a guy they barely know without any thought for the consequences?"

Now comes the doubt which he knew would always come. He knows she likes to pretend that she's got her whole life planned out, but he's got to know better: the reality is, she can't plan anything and he, Jess St James, is the most impromptu of them all.

"You do know me, Rachel." It's not quite an assurance; it's understated, but true nonetheless. She doesn't answer and he hopes it's because she knows it's at least a little bit true. But of course, if it was down to him, they'd be together every day so they both knew all about the other.

"But still Jesse, we shouldn't have-"

"What? Had sex?" He stands in front of her again and lets his hands slip back around her waist; they fit so well and it makes him sad that she can't see the perfection of the two of them. She cringes as he speaks but he merely shakes his head. "Rachel, it's nothing to be ashamed of. And besides, it's not like we've killed somebody. But, if it makes you feel better, we can tell no one, keep it a secret. Pretend like it never happened."

He can't quite look at her as he trails off because that's not what he wants to do at all. But he doesn't want to shout it from the rooftops either. He just wants her to feel as happy as he did when he woke up to find his bed wasn't empty and his heart didn't ache.

"I don't want that, I just want," she pauses because truth be told; she doesn't know what she wants. She thinks she wants Jesse, but when she looks into his eyes she realises there's so much more to him and the fact that their past ended the way it did will always play on her mind. "I just need to get my head clear first."

He nods and releases her waist, picking up his apple with his now spare hands. He tilts his head to the door and allows her to walk out, grabbing his script and following her out. Rehearsals may call, but he's not letting this drop.