Chapter 9

I didn't say anything as I got in the car except to tell him to drive. He didn't question me as I directed him far out of town and towards the more rural areas and finally to the edge of the woods that the town was surrounded on two sides by. I didn't even let him shut off the engine before I was out of the car, telling him to open the trunk.

I pulled out my gun and quickly loaded it, grabbing extra ammo just in case, as tears started mixing in with the rain. I slammed the trunk and started running towards the woods.

"Rose!"

I whizzed past tree after tree, not caring that branches were hitting my face and my bare arms. I finally stopped when there was at least a mile behind me and I heard Dean running after me, not far off. The trees protected me from the rain as I raised the gun and aimed at a tree farther away from me.

I started shooting at the tree, letting out my anger with each squeeze of the trigger.

"Rosemary!" Dean called, hearing the gun go off.

I was full on crying now, tears blurring my vision and I hoped that Dean wouldn't walk in front of me or sneak up behind me because there was a possibility that I'd shoot him instead of a tree. I finished the rounds that I had loaded and quickly tried to reload, digging my numb fingers into my jean pockets to pull the bullets out.

I felt a hand grip my arm just as I finished and I quickly turned and pointed the gun. I was surprised to see John instead of Dean, but Dean was standing there a few feet behind, not knowing what to do.

The gun was pointing straight at his forehead but he didn't waver. He grasped both my shoulders in his hands, tightly but comforting.

I dropped my arms and fell into his embrace, bawling my eyes out. I felt someone take the gun gently out of my hand and I could hear them saying something but it was lost over the sound of the rain and my crying.

I don't know how long I stayed in John's arms just crying, but I knew that Dean had left us alone probably to pick Sam up at the high school. I vaguely wondered what he would tell Sam.

I eventually pulled away to wipe my eyes. I was too ashamed to look up at him, especially as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me out of the woods to his truck. When we got in he turned the heater on but didn't drive anywhere.

"What do you want to know?" He asked gently. I sniffed and rubbed my nose with the back of my hand.

"What was the promise that you made?" I asked, finally looking up at him. "How did you know her?"

He looked upset, like having to think about her was painful.

"I met your mom at the Roadhouse. We talked about traveling with kids and I promised her that if she died or something happened to her that I would take you with me and take care of you. She promised the same for Sam and Dean." He told me. "She also made me promise that if she had been possessed… that I would… that I would take care of it. Even if she had no chance to survive."

"Is that why you don't let me go after demons? Because it wasn't actually a witch that killed her? It was a demon wasn't it?" I asked, finally understanding why I was always stuck with hunting spirits and everything other than demons. He nodded. Tears assaulted my vision again.

"Yes." He whispered.

"Was she," I paused as my throat tightened again and wiped away my tears. "Was she all ready dead when you found her?"

He shook his head.

"Her body was, but the demon was still inside her." He turned to look at me. "You'd been traveling with a demon for weeks."

"Why didn't the demon hurt me?" I asked. He shook his head again.

"I have no idea." I didn't know if I believed him.

John and I stayed in the truck where we were for another hour before he called Dean and ordered him and Sam to start packing everything up. He'd swing by so that they could follow us to our next destination, but he wasn't telling any of us where that was.

We drove through the night and for most of the next day but I had been sleeping through most of the drive since I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and from pure exhaustion from breaking down.

He gently nudged me to wake me up and I saw that it was four in the afternoon. I stretched as he called one of the boys again. He told them to go find some newspapers and find a job for us. It was then that I noticed we were outside a cemetery. I turned to look at him, to question what we were doing here, but he was silent as he got out of the car. I kept my head down as Dean and Sam drove past and John led me into the cemetery.

We passed many graves before he finally stopped in front of one. It was a small headstone, with a symbol on top that was protection from demons and I read the rest of the engraving.

Abigail Bennett

March 28, 1956 – September 13, 1989

Loving mother, loving friend.

I kneeled down, grateful that John brought me here. I had never gotten to say goodbye to my mom. We had left as soon as John had come back that day and when I had asked him later on about what had happened he'd only tell me that it had been taken care of.

I heard him walk off to give me space.

"Mom," I whispered, tears once again clouding my vision. There weren't any flowers on her grave and I used my sleeve to wipe off the headstone and make it look a little nicer. "I miss you so much mom."

My lip trembled as I ran my fingers across her name.

"I'm so sorry that I couldn't save you." I was so tired of crying but now I felt like I had an actual reason to cry. "I wish we could have had more time together."

"Dad," I turned and saw John leaning against a tree 20 feet or so away. Dean had come back and was showing him an article, probably a job. Dean looked up at me while John read and I turned back to my mom's grave.

"Thank you for sending me with the Winchester's." I whispered. "They hold me together when I feel like I'm breaking."

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see John.

"Dean and Sam found a job." I nodded and started to get up. John held me down. "Sam and I are gonna go on ahead. Stay as long as you need to. Dean's gonna stay with you and you guys will catch up when you can."

He kneeled down for a second and rested his hand on top of the headstone. He bent his head with his eyes closed and I looked away. He squeezed my shoulder and kissed the top of my head as he left.

I sat back and crossed my legs.

"Sometimes I feel like I don't know what I'm doing. Sam's my best friend but he doesn't want to stay anymore and he wants me to leave with him." It was starting to get dark and I wrapped my arms around myself as I started to get cold. "I don't want to let him down, but I don't want to leave the job."

"What am I going to do?" I whispered. Two seconds later I heard footsteps behind me and looked up to see Dean behind me, taking his leather jacket off. He placed it on my shoulders and I slowly put my arms through the sleeves, wrapping it close. It smelled like Dean and it reminded me of how calm it made me. How calm Dean usually made me. I never really noticed it before. I had finally placed the smell that I couldn't recognize all those years ago. He smelled like leather and nutmeg. The only reason I knew why it was nutmeg was because that's what I always associated my mother with.

"Can I?" Dean asked, motioning to the ground next to me. I nodded and he sat down close next to me. He crossed his legs like mine and our knees were touching.

"I've never talked to a grave before," he admitted quietly. I nodded. John had never taken the boys to visit their mother's grave. Sam had told me that he wanted to but I didn't know if he had ever talked to his dad about it.

"Me neither," I said, smiling sadly before looking back at the headstone.

"Why do I always get sucked into chick flick moments with you?" He asked. I laughed softly.

"Maybe it's because I'm a chick." I said sarcastically. He nodded as if that made sense. "Or maybe you're gay."

"Bite your tongue!" He exclaimed. I laughed more loudly than before. He smiled and nudged my shoulder with his. "That's my favorite Rosie smile."

It was almost completely dark out and I was surprised that Dean wasn't trying to hurry me along. The job must not have been that bad if John and Sam could get along long enough to do it without us.

"What do you remember about her?" He asked gently. I smiled softly, picturing her driving her truck and singing along to the angry girl music that I had grown so fond of.

"She was beautiful." I said, remembering how the sun would make her blonde hair look golden. "She was so smart too. I wanted to be just like her when I grew up."

"She sounds great." He said. I nodded. "You miss her a lot, don't you?"

I nodded again.

"Hey, uh, I forgot to give this to you earlier because of everything." He wrapped his arm around my back and started digging in one of the pockets in his jacket. My breath caught in my throat as I felt the warmth of his body against mine. I watched as he pulled something out and took his arm away. "I got it fixed for you."

He handed me the necklace. The blue crystal ball was dangling on a new silver chain which looked much stronger than the other chain had been.

I put it on and tried not to shiver as he pulled my hair back so I could clasp it. I held the crystal in my hand.

"Thank you so much Dean." I smiled and hugged him tightly. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged back.

"I didn't realize that you still wore it. I only ever saw you wear it that night for that dance." He said, pulling away. My heart did somersaults as he smiled at me and I suddenly felt very awkward having this exchange in front of my mom's grave.

"I've never taken it off," I told him, honestly. "Except to shower."

I looked back at the headstone, wondering when the next time I'd be able to visit would be. Then I wondered if I ever would. I felt guilty and sad when I realized that I probably wouldn't ever get to.

"We're, uh, taking really good care of her," I turned to Dean again when I realized he was talking to my mom. "You'd be really proud of everything she's done Mrs. Bennett."

"Bye mom," I whispered. Dean stood up and helped me up as well, leading me out of the cemetery and away from my mom's grave with his arm around my shoulders.

Walking out of the cemetery, I felt much stronger than I had the day before. I knew at least some of the truth about what happened with my mom, I got the chance to say goodbye and I had even gotten my necklace back.

Hopefully things would keep getting better.