Chapter 8 Three Blind Mice
A/N: Oh how I love Stephenie Meyer for creating such amazing characters for us to mold and distort and put together again.
Hopefully this something new is fun for you. It certainly was for me!
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JPOV
Dammit, Bella. Honestly, over the knee stockings? God. And why the hell is her skirt so short? I really have my work cut out for me. Every low life at Fremont is going to have her on their radar after one glimpse of this uniform.
Why couldn't she just be plain – not ugly, cause who really enjoys hanging out with ugly people even when they're just your cousin – but maybe a little homely is all I'm sayin'? She can't even manage to be just pretty she has to set a new bangable standard over all of Fremont. Fuck.
I am a guy, and I am not blind. If anything I'm simply hyper aware of the reaction Bella's attire undoubtedly warrants. Every other girl would be wearing the same, Britney-esk outfit - only sans uber-fantasy stockings - but they weren't new meat and completely oblivious to their charm the way Bella was. And it doesn't get much sexier than an untainted new girl who has no idea how fuckable she is – and in thigh-highs no less.
"What, Jasper?" Her cheeks were a little pink, and she looked huffy.
I just want to keep you safe, and the guys here are not safe. But you demand to make this as difficult as possible.
"Nothing." I replied to her obvious frustration at my appraisal of her appearance. She wouldn't believe me even if I elaborated.
Onward to hell, shall we?
I led us from the hall, to the second floor and into the Commons. Everyone turned and of course began to stare; many looked stunned, some eyes bulged, other's mouths hung agape, tongues lapping - and those were just the guys. Many girls threw stink eyes, some looked purely curious and others pretended to ignore. Bella would realize at some point all eyes were on her and once she did she'd flame up and her day would be a disaster. I need a distraction.
The coffee cart at the far side of the room looked promising, so I grabbed her and headed over.
Normally Bella would have my full attention, but as we got in line I spotted Rose lounging in one of the sofas with Alice beside her. Alice.
Seeing Alice brought back my inane actions caused by being so close to her at Roaslie's doorway; so cheerful, so intoxicating. I'm such a mute douche. But remembering my encounter with her this weekend only forced me to recall the other times she'd appeared during the last two days.
Like Saturday afternoon, when a matted and peeked Alice jumped out of a Jeep, flashing her radiant smile towards said vehicle's driver and my polo Captain, Emmett Cullen. Thanking him for the swim – A swim? Oh. My. Fuck. – she turned and floated away; her high heels accentuating the length of her legs, the curve of her ass and her tiny waist.
Or fucking Sunday night as Alice threw her petite, perfect body into the awaiting arms of Edward Cullen, the returned supposed best friend. Legs entwined around his waist, head thrown back in laughter and delight, the sound of my heart ripping and teeth grinding in unbearable jealousy surrounding me. And then, she jumped down only to take the arm of Emmett, swimming companion extraordinaire, and pressed closely to his side in greeting, looking upward into his eyes with what could only be described as affection.
Now seeing her before me, the confusion began to take on a life of its own. The same questions I'd been drowning myself in since last night now felt more like a mental explosion. Is she dating Emmett? Is she really only best friends with Edward? You've always thought they were much more. But both of them? Are they sharing? I saw stars at that tasteless, degrading idea.
I realized Bella was answering my question about Rosalie and mentioned something about a bulky, curly haired guy, but all I could see was Alice on the arm of Emmett, my bulky, curly haired quasi-friend and teammate. Alice swimming in a silver bikini, the sun reflecting off her flawless skin, Emmett's filthy hands on that skin, Edward eventually joining them, water trailing between … wait - I shuddered in repercussion as I reclaimed reality - swimming … practice. I'd see both perpetrators at polo practice today after school.
I was so tense from my silent musings that my inner secrecy must have seeped into my conversation with Bella, but it didn't matter if she thought I was weird for whispering, I'd possibly just figured out a way to gain clarity in this entire Alice mess. I had to know if I stood a chance. Nothing like the prospect of the girl you want getting with two guys simultaneously to set a fire underneath your ass.
With Edward's return to Fremont, he'd undoubtedly be at practice to reclaim his starting place – James'll be fucking pissed – and Emmett was always more verbal after an entertaining weekend. Perhaps practice would give me insight into this heart wrenching, messed up ménage a trois.
I paid for our drinks and let my eyes linger on Alice's shiny black hair and curved pout as we walked toward the courtyard. Oh, how I want to know those lips.
I brought Bella to Banner Tower, where her first class would be, and offered to return afterwards to help her find her next. As I suspected, she was too independent for her own good and insisted she could handle it. I love how her little chin sticks up all tough. The little kitten thinks she's a ferocious tiger. I tried not to let the small smile break free so it most likely came out looking like a grimace.
I wouldn't see her again until the end of the day, and I really didn't want to leave her to fend for herself, but I promised to meet my little one-woman pep rally outside of the P.E.T. and hoped she'd make it through unscathed.
Walking to my government class I saw something that sent my mind reeling and my stomach heaving; Rosalie and Emmett engaged in an all out mouth fuck. Maybe it's all a conspiracy and everyone is fucking everyone.
The day passed without consequence, though feeling a little halted and jerky, and all too slowly 2:45 became a reality as I fidgeted against the brick wall of the P.E.T. waiting for Bella.
Five minutes later there she was, coming around the corner, looking alight with something.
"Good day?" I already knew the answer.
"Something like that. I made it. That's what counts, right?" I steadied us both - a balance for my jitters and a weight for her unexplained euphoria - as my arm came down around Bella's shoulders.
I walked her inside, towards her seat for the duration of practice, and Bella chose that moment to bring up scarring emotional baggage from our childhood. The public pool? Of course I remember.
"I remember you shouting at me to get out and not worry about everyone seeing my winky 'cause you were cold and wanted to go home." I still can't believe she labeled my dick 'winky.' Second graders can be so cruel.
"I was cold and you should have just used a towel. Why you had to be so stubborn and demand your Power Ranger swim trunks I'll never understand."
She did her little snort laugh and I couldn't help but chuckle at such a ridiculous memory, as well as the snort.
I walked off to get changed into what Bella considered God's most horrific creation, and inwardly had to admit the Speedo wasn't my favorite either. Those Power Ranger trunks were the shit, though!
Most of the guys were dressed down, so I hustled, flinging my clothes into the open locker and pulling on the offensive suit. Cap and towel in hand I headed for the door where Emmett caught up with me. Bring on the weekend raving, my friend. We walked across to the other side of the pool.
"So, your cousin, huh?" He had a cheesy smile plastered on his face, but an actual question in his eyes.
"Uh, yeah. Her name's Bella." This conversation already felt contorted and I really had no more brain room left to weed through additional Emmett induced confusion.
"She's hot man, I'll give you that." We were now standing in front of the rest of the team, and my eyes shifted over towards Bella. Great, so it begins.
That's when I realized Bella wasn't alone. One bleacher over sat Rose and Alice. Unnnggg… my coherent thoughts shorted out.
"Hey, you talkin' 'bout Bella, Cap?" Mike decided to join in. Thank god. What do you say when someone comments on your cousin like that … thank you?
"Yeah dude, but she's Jasper's." Huh? I felt an implication in Emmett's words but decided it had to be a result of my fuzzy Alice brain.
"She is my cousin. So how about you guys stay the fuck away." I said this with a smile, but put meaning behind every word. My eyes found Alice again.
"Yep. Your cousin." Emmett kept on with the repetition and implications I couldn't be imagining, but then shouting broke out at the other side of the pool and my attention was pulled elsewhere.
It looked like coach was breaking the news to James that Edward was back. Knew he'd be pissed. How he missed the tornado Edward's arrival was stirring up in school is beyond me. The shouting died down and James took off, hopefully to cool down.
Edward joined us, and was welcomed by the few guys who couldn't make it out to the party. Coach started warm ups and I took my place for laps in between Emmett and Mike.
"If I had a cousin that looked like that," Emmett murmured, "I'd bang her too. No one blames you, man."
The whistle sounded and I dove into the water.
WHAT THE FUCK? Bang her? He means Bella right? That has to be what all that 'she's his' shit and 'yeah, your cousin' was about. Come on. Who believes shit like that? Emmett is such a naïve fucktard. Just cause you'd screw your cousin, Captain, doesn't mean we all would. God.
Ten laps later we emerged from our prospective trenches.
"What the fuck, Emmett? How sick do you have to be to think like that? She's my fucking cousin, man." These words came out in a kind of strained laugh. I was still breathing hard from the laps as I pulled myself onto the ledge.
Emmett held up his hands in surrender. "Hey dude, that's just what I heard. Sorry, thought it was as reliable a source as you could get."
"Who told you this?" I wasn't really angry, mostly just grossed out and blanching in utter disbelief.
He looked uncomfortable and a little upset as he answered, "Well, actually Alice told me."
FUUUUUUUCCCCKKKKKKK!!!!
"And she said she heard it from Rosalie."
Rosalie fucking Lillian fucking Hale.
Now I was mad.
EmPOV
"Oh, Emmett, mmm." Her words were all throaty and hushed and made my dick jerk in my pants.
She continued rocking her body against me and pressed her breasts flush with my chest as I sucked on the skin just beneath her ear. Rosalie smelled like vanilla orchids and blackberries, her skin smooth and hot under my lips.
She pulled one hand over my shoulder and clasped it behind my neck, letting the other roam under my uniform jacket and tug away at my tucked in dress shirt. Finally freeing it, she slipped her warm hand underneath and into the waistband of my pants and then beneath, into my boxer briefs. My breath hitched on contact.
Meeting her mouth I pulled her bottom lip between both of mine, sucking gently and sweeping my tongue back and forth, entranced by her taste. She parted her lips for me then and I wound my tongue with hers as my hands stroked both of her sides, purposefully grazing the swell of her breasts with each pass. At that sensation she purred, which spurred me on further.
Fully pinning her to the wall, I deepened the kiss, turning my head to gain better access as I hitched up her leg, propping it over my bent knee, and slipped my hand up her thigh and under her pleated skirt. My thumb was full on tweaking her nipple now, through her white shirt and thin bra, causing her to squirm and arch her back.
I moved my thigh bound hand high enough to reach around, slip my fingers under her panties and squeeze her bare ass.
She hissed into my mouth and ground her center into the thigh she was straddled over.
And then the single bell rang, reminding us of our very public location and the reality that we were both now late to class.
I touched my forehead to hers before she extricated herself from my grasp and straightened up. As a parting, she firmly rubbed her palm once over my dick, smoothed her uniform and walked away.
Fuck. Me. Now.
I couldn't go anywhere until I got myself under control, so I thought of the most dick deflating sight imaginable - all my teammates in their Speedos - and that cleared me right up.
Dammit, Rosalie Hale would be my undoing. I'd thought something might happen last year when we partnered in Bio, but for whatever reason it didn't and for that I'd always been sorry. Then last night, out of the blue, she sauntered over and asked if I was glad my brother was back in town. I was, so I said so.
She didn't seem as distracted as she normally did whenever conversing with others and she wasn't surrounded by her usual pack of highly annoying cling ons, so I was open. And honestly there was nothing I wanted more than to talk to Rosalie Hale. Except, of course, to be fucking Rosalie Hale. But, whatever, talking always seemed to be the first step in that direction. Well, it was with normal girls, anyway.
Rosalie was the shit around here, basically Fremont's matriarch. She knew it too, and that was hot. She was controlling and manipulative and domineering. HOT. And not normal.
And now, apparently, we were getting frisky in the courtyard pre-session. Not that I'm complaining. Obviously, though, this chic liked to run hot and cold. We were hot right now, but she could turn frigid without warning. How do you keep a girl like Rosalie hot? I figured I'd have to wait for brilliance to strike later, otherwise my ass would be riding sub come match day with unexcused absences under my belt.
I was only about five minutes late to Calc when Edward wandered in behind me.
"Dude, I know why I was late - and it was necessary if you know what I mean - but this is your first day back. Don't screw the team by being a tardy douche."
"Go to hell, Emmett. I over slept." Now that he mentioned it, he did look pretty out of it.
"You locked yourself in your room at, like, eleven. Why the hell would you oversleep?" We were in our seats now and Edward just continued to face forward as if we weren't having a conversation.
"No good reason." From what I could see his eyes looked a little wild and he sat ridged in his chair, unlike any tired person I'd ever seen. He better not be on anything. We test in like three fucking days. Everyone would hear if I asked now, so I didn't.
"O-kay."
Edward basically ignored me for the rest of class, and Alice, sitting closer to the instructor than anyone enjoyed, kept tossing glances and smiles over her shoulder at us.
Hmm. Now Alice was something completely different all together. She was nothing like Rosalie, besides being mindbogglingly hot. Even her sex appealed in a majorly different way. Alice was tiny. There was just certain shit you could only do with tiny girls. Too many images … god, a guy could get permanently lost on that girl.
While Rosalie was a wild card, Alice seemed consistent. And Alice wanted Jasper, who apparently only fucked cousins. I'm not looking for a girlfriend though, and Alice would be more fun than I might possibly know what to do with. Plus, she is energetic. She just goes. There is something to be said for unwavering energy. If Rose was the jaguar, Alice was the cheetah. Very different, indeed.
Determined not to box myself in, I decided there was plenty of Emmett to go around. Maybe I could cushion the blow that would be Jasper and Bella going public – as public as you can get seeing as it's illegal … it's illegal right? I mean, come on, I wasn't blind. I saw them arrive at, as well as leave, the party last night together; they were so obviously in their own little world for two. Poor Alice.
The double bell trilled and I looked over at Edward. What is this guy's problem?
Everyone was sayin' 'hi' or 'welcome back' to him, and honestly he never paid anyone much attention, but he looked so uncomfortable or confused … or something.
"Hey man, lets get out of here." We stood and that's when Alice reached us all perky and glossy lips.
"Hey guys … Edward? Hey, E what's wrong?" I knew she'd cut his shit and make him talk.
But, she didn't.
"Nothing. I've got to go." And he just turned and walked out, raking his hands through his hair making him look like a crazy hobo.
Alice turned to me. "Do you know what's up with him?" She wrapped her miniature hand in the crook of my elbow as we made our way out the door. I knew she had Social Dynamics next, so I pointed us in that direction.
"He said that he overslept this morning, but then looked like he'd been electrocuted. Maybe he's in shock. Perhaps London doesn't look so bad now that he's back to the ritzy dramatics of Fremont." I grinned down at her and moved behind her, slightly encircling her waist to maneuver her through the crowd.
Her bells and chimes laugh chorused as she leaned into my guiding arms. "Yeah, it's all been a lot of change, rather quickly. He'll calm down. I bet being back in the water will help."
"Will you be at practice today then, cheering me on?" I wonder if she realizes that I'm shamelessly flirting. And hating her tie considerably for blocking my view down her shirt.
"Ha. I was thinking about going to cheer Edward on!" She looked up at me with a grin that said 'duh.' "You know, since it is his first day back and everything."
I kissed her forehead as I left her by her session door. "As long as you're there."
I turned back once to send a parting smile, and when I faced front my eyes connected with Rosalie's. Oh yes, she has this pathetic excuse for a class as well. The look in her eye said she'd witnessed my exchange with Alice. Plenty of Emmett to go around baby, I thought as I smacked her ass in passing.
I didn't see anyone else for the rest of the morning, and I took my free period in the library so I could work on formations and a couple attack strategies. We had a match in Puyallup on Saturday and with Edward back we needed to revamp some of the old plays. He and I were unstoppable, and really James couldn't fill half of Edward's shoes as center. As point, and Captain, it was important I have a well-developed connection with our main scorer, and it really couldn't get easier than teaming up with Edward. He knew what formation I wanted before I said a word. The ass kicking advantage of brothers.
Eric wouldn't be there today, so I'd have Jasper pick up goalie. It should be a good practice.
I looked up from my formation sketches and found wide, freaked eyes looking back at me.
"Fuck, dude," I whispered so we wouldn't get thrown out – I really had a lot to do and only here to do it - "you don't look good."
Edward just kept looking back at me like he was waiting for me to answer him. I returned my focus to my work. If you're going to be difficult and look all wild and scary …
"What do you know about Bella?" This sentence was like Latin to me: foreign and full of misunderstood meaning. The idea of translating it seemed arduous and purposeless. Edward didn't ask about girls. He had them and walked away. No thoughts, no questions. No legitimate interest. So I gave it straight.
"She's fucking Jasper." That was all I knew. Oh yeah, "And she lived on the peninsula." That too.
"They're cousins." Edward only looked thoughtful now. How are you not shocked? I was at least shocked. 'Cause that shit's just weird. But it was true.
"I have a reliable source. Very informed." I shrugged. A sister would know best.
All the tension that had taken up store in Edward's shoulders and neck evaporated, his trademark calm returned, the cool began emanating from him once again.
"That's all I needed to know." A slow cocky grin spread, but his eyes still held what I thought might be sadness.
"You interested? She is hot."
He just stood and headed towards the door. "I was," was his only goodbye.
EPOV
You were looking for something, anything. Just one excuse to write this off.
Now you have it.
Bella was fucking her cousin.
It didn't matter that I fell asleep quickly last night only to dream of her peaches and cream skin on mine and her long hair tangled all around me. It was irrelevant that I woke up completely drenched through with sweat and lingering memories of her mouth sucking, licking, murmuring things against my ear and realized I'd have to motor to make it to session on time. I was not as effected as I'd thought when I held her body extra close, after feeling the urge, no the need to intervene when I saw her go flying. Her warm, small, no doubt supple body moaning in my arms. God. It wasn't the end of the world that I caressed her hip or stroked her hair or got lost in all her coconut and gardenia … or was it freesia? And I laughed with her. I laughed.
It wasn't a problem that I forgot who I was for one incomplete conversation and realized too late that switching personas wouldn't go unnoticed by her. I wasn't blind, or stupid for that matter, I saw her register my shift; I was even thankful she cut me off before I could say something I'd regret, perhaps even regret horribly. And why the hell would I have regretted it? Why now? Why her?
Well, not her anymore. I had my excuse. Filthy. She fucked her cousin.
I fucking hate Jasper Hale.
I don't think it's true. That isn't her. It was her. She is that. I'm done.
And apparently, the battle was over. But what about the war?
I rushed to make it to French on time. One tardy is enough today, I haven't even really claimed my place on the team yet. Don't want to give James ammo for an injunction.
I'd been so outside myself all day long that I actually felt exhausted. But also I'd never felt as alive as I did this morning, when I first woke up, or this afternoon, when I swallowed her sent down like a starving man. That was when I'd determined to find a reason not to let this immediate infatuation rule me. I could not resign myself to this; I would not relinquish control. I left London to take my life back. It was time for the driver's seat.
I planted myself in my desk and dragged out my textbook.
Our course material provided a welcome pause in my ever present mental turmoil; no matter how resolved I was to this new development - to the acceptance of my excuse – I could only seem to hold the chaos back so far. Session flew by and, before I realized it, homework was being assigned and the spot behind my right ear began to tingle. Instinctively I turned and felt my instability flooding back as I found deep, brown eyes penetrating my resolve.
Who even said she was interested? Perhaps I didn't warrant a pause in thought. She may not even remember my name.
And that was the true issue here, if I was finally honest. The mere idea of her, not a girl or a girlfriend or an interest, but actually her … left me vulnerable. How alien.
And now I couldn't even drop her gaze or move from my desk. Every possibility, every unknown swirled around me, holding me in place, until she broke the connection and walked away.
And if she isn't interested and I'm open and she leaves - I'd be over. And I was out of my seat before she reached the door, flying faster towards the secondary exit than I'd moved all day absorbed in my chaotic internal conflict.
I couldn't truly say I'd be worse for her than, say, screwing your cousin, because that shit's bound to leave you psychologically fucked. But I was bad enough. Heart of stone. Impenetrable. Well, almost. Or, I was. Now I'm clinging to rumors I don't even believe.
I ran all the way to the P.E.T. and found the coach in his office, in desperate need of a distraction. He asked about London, I deflected. No need to flaunt mistakes. We walked out to the pool in the direction of the locker rooms, where I'd head shortly to finally dress down and get back to where I belonged.
He'd known I was back for less than twenty-four hours but, of course, assumed I'd claim my spot. I mean, come on, I had trained with the team as center for the entire off and pre season; I'd earned it. Plus, Emmett was Captain and just loved to spout off about "connections" and "the brothers who kicked ass;" he may have even had a song. That seemed almost ridiculously embarrassing enough to be something Em would do.
Coach seemed pleased to have me back, even though I was a difficult, arrogant, son of a bitch. I am a fucking god of a center. So I headed to the lockers with no plans of being any of those things today. Might as well ease everyone back in. Not that I have the energy to do anything besides swim anyway.
The guys were all leaving and I heard the shouting begin. James is tiring. Best not to be stuck in here with him shitting bullets like that. I threw my suit on and grabbed my cap, realizing too late I'd forgotten a towel, and passed James on my way out.
He wanted to hit me; I could feel it.
I pushed myself hard during laps and drills. As a team we focused on what formations we'd use Saturday and I honed in on my strategy of attack; following through with the formation and scoring was my main purpose. Besides training and off-season tournaments, this sport was still new to me, although, I wasn't concerned. I was naturally agile and affluent in water - so unlike my music. I had to labor over compositions before they were what I knew they could be.
And it wasn't that I was opposed to dedication or hard work, it was the chance that dissuaded me - the chance to fail. Prime example: London. I have one place, one puzzle where my piece fits and my study abroad was the proof.
Do you even know what happiness is?
My head snapped up, from its neck bent position, as I shakily walked to the bench to take a breather. Where did that come from? Happiness? What the hell? And all my resolve blew away.
Heart thumping erratically at such an uncharacteristic question, head spinning, thoughts freaking out that I'd finally actually lost it, lost my control. From one fucking question. My eyes also reacted to the bewilderment of my mind as they flitted about, scanning the area.
God. All the air whooshed out of my chest, and I choked on the unavoidable answer.
Happiness was the brown eyes looking into me at that moment. Happiness was realizing they were actually there, in the same room, focused completely on only me and lit on fire. Happiness was recognizing want and burning and emergency in them. Happiness was feeling like I was looking into my own eyes and seeing my own thoughts and conflictions and desires. And Happiness didn't fade when she shot up from her bleacher, mouth tossing out silent words, and all but annihilated everything in her path during her escape.
Happiness didn't walk out when she did. Happiness lived here now.
This happiness was permanent, whether I was her happiness or not.
I grasped my hands over my head and brought it down between my legs, feeling like both a flying and dying man. I couldn't ignore it. The denial was over. It wasn't about a question, it was about recognizing her, and recognizing myself, absolutely, because of her.
I'd never been the recipient of a truly pivotal moment before. I'd never made the leap required to grab it.
But, what happens when you're left with no choice but to jump?
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A/N: Okay, so that was an absolute blast for me. It was also a new format that I'm sure I'll have a better grasp on for Chapter 9 when we hear from the girls. Oh yes, the girls have their turn! Thank you for bearing with me while I play and experiment. Thank you so much to those of you who read and those who leave me reviews, it is encouraging and thoughtful of you. So, thank you for giving back a little bit of your time to let me know your thoughts! Happy, Happy New Year:)