Kate sighed as she lay across Rick's broad chest. It was times like this that she remembered how much she loved him. How their relationship problems seemed so insignificant. The move to Boston seemed so far away, as were all of the problems they faced in the real world. Here in this bed, she could always remember why she had fallen for him and she knew it wasn't just the sex. She had loved him long before they crossed had that line.
"So I heard you went down to HQ today." He said softly.
Leave it to Rick to know when to ask the right questions at the wrong time. "Regan just offered me a command."
He pushed his head back so he could get a better look at her, "He did?"
"That's why Jane and I were called down to Police Plaza." She said and the look in his eye prompted her to explain. She didn't like that feeling but he did deserve to know. "We got a 98% rate and Reagan knows about our transfers and he offered up a command. He wouldn't say which one."
"I'd like to think that you were going to talk to me about this."
She could feel her pride swelling up at the accusation but a fight was the last thing she wanted to ruin this. Better to try to shut it down now. "Yes, I was going to tell you about it. A lot happened since I got the offer but I was going to talk to you about it tomorrow or the next day."
"After you decided what you were going to do?"
She sat up, "Rick, I don't want to fight."
He groaned at the loss of her body against his, "I don't want to fight either but I do want to be involved in the decisions of this family."
She stared at him, "I want you to be involved as well."
"That's good." He replied, "So tell me about it."
She pulled the covers up over her shoulders, "One of Reagan's favorite lines is that he runs 35,000 cops, he can't afford to play favorites. He offered to bump me to Lieutenant and give me command. He also offered to bump Jane up to sergeant and have her permanently assigned as my partner. Plus, he also told us that if Gates moved on, I'd be her replacement and Jane would be my Head Sergeant."
"Reagan didn't get to be the commissioner without being smart." He said, "He knows you and Jane are an asset and he doesn't want to lose a valuable resource."
Needing to tell him the whole truth she sighed, "He also told me that the offer was still good if Jane still wanted to head back to Boston."
He stared up at her in disbelief, "Well. He doesn't know you that well, does he? You'd never even think about breaking up with Jane."
"I have." She said and hid her eyes. "Everything I've worked so hard for is being put right in front of me and all I can think of is how much I don't want to lose my best friend. Jane and Maura want to go home and I want to go with them to Boston. Alexis has already put in her application to BCU and Cavanaugh sent me all of the paperwork. I've filled it all out and I'm ready to go but you don't want to leave."
"I want to be with you." He said, "That's something that hasn't changed.
"You don't want to leave New York, Rick." She said and her emotions were starting to slip out. "I know you don't and I want to go to Boston more to be with my friends than I want to stay here. I love Jane and her family and I want to be with them."
He reached up to wipe a tear from her cheek but she stopped him. "Christmas really brought it home for me, Rick." She said, "I've seen how Jane grew up and I want that too."
It was extremely rare for Kate to let this kind of feeling show and it caused Rick to realize that the next few minutes would decide not only whether or not they went to Boston, but also how they would define their relationship.
He leaned back and watched her carefully, unwilling to do anything to stop her from letting it out.
"Tell me about it, Kate." He said. "Let me know what you're feeling."
She sighed, "I want it all, Rick. I know it's selfish, I know that I'm just thinking of myself but I want to be a part of it. Jane has this family that just keeps getting bigger and I've never felt so wanted and appreciated, every time I went to Boston over the last three years, Angela has welcomed me with open arms, stuffed me full of all of this good home cooked food that wasn't catered or prepared by a five star chef. It was made by a short Italian mother who made it with love and family.
"She can be nosy and a busybody but she does it out of love for her family and she included me on that list just like she did Maura. They grew up in a house that had a yard and a neighborhood. I grew up in a condo that overlooked Central park uptown. Yeah we had money and Jane's family never had much but they grew up with something that I never had."
His voice laden with understanding and curiosity, "What was that?"
She looked down at him and his eyes were what convinced her to say it, "I had a mother and a father and they were good parents, they were. But Jane had brothers, she had a whole family. And she still has her… she still has Ma."
Kate collapsed into his arms and he held on to her tightly; "Oh Kate."
She cried into her shoulder, "I'm sorry. It's especially bad since today is my mother's birthday." She said softly. "And I feel so guilty for loving a woman who didn't give birth to me every bit as much as if she did."
He sighed as he held her close, "Kate, you don't have to feel guilty about that."
"Yes I do!" She shouted, "I'm betraying my mother's memory. I want to be with my family, I want to be held by Ma when I'm hurt and I want to be encouraged to do better and I want her to be proud of me. But I don't want to feel like I'm forgetting my mother, forgetting what happened to her."
This was a side of Kate that Rick had never seen before. He knew that the Beckett murder had been hard on her and that she was hiding her feelings about it. He simply attributed it to her tough nature. Never had the thought she bore this kind of burden.
Kate hated exposing herself like this, even to Rick, but he was the only one she could do this with and it was time to let it all go. "It's a good offer Rick and I want to take it but…"
His eyes fell to the dresser where a picture of their family stood tall and alone. Kate was holding Alexis and Rick stood behind her with an arm around her waist. Jane stood next to Kate and Maura was under her arm. It was as close to a real family as Kate had ever known. With a few well-placed words he could sway her to stay here with him but he knew that it would tear her apart. Jane meant every bit as much to her as he did and he couldn't take that away from her.
He closed his eyes and prepared himself for what he was about to say. "But you don't want to give up your new family and you shouldn't have to." He sighed, "Have you talked to Jane about this at all?"
She shook her head, "There wasn't time."
"You should. You're both going out of town tomorrow so why don't you discuss it then?" He said casually, "I know Jane well enough to know that she's got to be terrified of you choosing to stay here."
Kate buried her face into his shoulder, "She and Maura want to go home so bad and I don't want to be the one who makes them stay."
"It's their choice, Kate." He said, "You need to talk it over with your sister and decide what you really want to do. I know Jane, she'd stay with you and Maura would too. You know that my place is with you and I'll be right beside you no matter what you choose."
Her body jerked twice as she cried quietly. "It all falls on me, everyone wants to see what I'm going to do. I don't want to be the one to choose this time."
"It's no one's call but yours, Kate." He said, "Jane and Maura might go back to Boston anyway even if you do choose to stay here. That's their choice and all you have to do is focus on what you really want. Like Maura said to Jane, my place is with you; no matter where you go, I'll follow."
Kate looked up at him, "That's not what she said."
He smiled tightly to her, "Not exactly but I couldn't help but make that work a little better. I am a writer after all."
She smiled at him and leaned down to kiss him, "If I say that I want to live in Boston?"
"Then I'm glad that Jane has brothers that I can hang out with so I don't get estrogen poisoning."
Her smile went tight and she tried not to laugh but his mischievous grin broke through her melancholy and she laughed softly. Once she was able to contain it again she kissed him fully before looking back down at him, "Thank you, Rick."
"For what?" He asked.
"For not taking advantage of this, for understanding, for being you and loving me."
He grinned at her, "Oh I wouldn't say I wasn't talking advantage." He shifted his hips so his erection pressed against her belly beneath the blankets, "I was just waiting for the right time to press my luck."
Kate's eyes widened, "That's like seven times tonight."
"And I'm still hungry." He leaned in and rolled her onto her back. "It's your fault. I can't help that you show me things that no one has ever seen in you."
Kate wrapped her legs around his hips and pulled him closer, "Then let me show you something else that you've never seen in me." With a twist of her hips, he was on his back and she was straddling him, the blankets fell to the floor and Kate leaned down, "You always ask about my wild past, now I'm going to show you how wild I can be." She said right before their lips met and their tongues danced together.
She stood before the massive mirror in the office bathroom and adjusted the collar of the white dress shirt beneath her pinstriped vest. She had left the top two buttons open because of her distain for the red tie that lay pinned to the countertop with a long stiletto knife, it was the compromise she had insisted on before taking over the family business.
Once her collar sat right and she checked to make sure her .45 Smith and Wesson revolver was securely snug in the shoulder holster she wore, she lifted the black suit jacket from its hangar and slipped it on. Adjusting the pocket squares in her breast pocket and admiring the beautifully subdued crimson floral pattern. Her wife bought it for her as a peace offering from the fight they had when Jane agreed to run things. She sighed, thinking of her beautiful wife.
Maura was always a vision and although she couldn't lie worth a damn she could keep her mouth shut with the best of them. She didn't approve of the career change Jane had but keeping her wife and son safe was her most important task, her highest priority. She couldn't do that as a flat foot anymore, there were too many dangers. So she had shucked everything she believed in for the love of her family. What surprised her was that it wasn't that hard to give up her badge. What washard was giving up her sister. That had been the hardest thing she'd ever done. She stared into her own black eyes and the look she got almost gave her a shiver, almost.
She heard a knock from the office door and as the door opened the heavy foot falls of her father echoed through the room. He was tall, over six feet, with a large body that was both muscled and carried extra pounds from living "the good life". He put his hands on her shoulders and smiled.
"You look good, Jane." He said, his voice was deep and throaty, his hazel eyes piercing with the hard knowledge of the industry. He could feel the tension in her shoulders. "Relax. I know you'll do fine and most of those monkeys downstairs already fear you from your previous job. All you have to do is make them respect you."
She nodded as she looked through the mirror of his grizzled face. He nodded, the light from the ceiling making his silver hair shimmer. "I know just how to do that, too."
He nodded with an evil glint in his eye, "He's down there, too."
Paddy Doyle pulled an ice pick out of his pocket and held it up, "Care for a tool?"
She shook her head and smiled kindly, "I like mine better." She said as she held up one fist.
He nodded, "Good, you need something to define you with these goons."
Again she nodded, "I got it."
Her father bent down and kissed the back of her head, "We're ready then."
Jane straightened her jacket and fastened it over her flat stomach. It was time. She made sure that her suit was perfect before she stepped away from the mirror. Today she took over the Irish Mob and made it her own.
Paddy held the door for her and she walked out onto the second floor of the huge mansion that had been his home for nearly twenty years. Ever since prohibition had made them all rich, but times were changing and it wouldn't be long before moonshining and boot legging wouldn't be so profitable. She had some ideas on that.
Maura stood dressed in a formal red gown that matched her pocket squares perfectly since the tailors they had hired cut the cloth from the very same bolt as they had the dress. She smiled kindly and embraced her love. Jane kissed her gently and smiled.
"It's a brand new day, baby." She said. "Today I make good on my promise to keep you and Anthony safe."
Maura's eyes turned sad, "I just wish we didn't have to do it this way, Jane."
She received another kiss, "Me too, but I don't see another way."
"Neither do I," Maura said as she shook her shoulders and straightened her back, "Good luck, my love."
A half grin graced one cheek and revealed a dimple, "I don't need luck. I just need you."
"And you shall always have me Jane." Maura promised, "I can't live without you so you must be careful."
Jane's face fell into a serious expression, "I will baby. I will."
Maura released her and tugged on the sleeves near the gold cufflinks, before adjusting the collar and brushing off her love's shoulders. "You look perfect, a career mobster in her prime."
She smiled at the compliment. "I love you."
"I love you too." Maura said and she turned away, eager to get away from the family business. She knew she was a terrible liar so it was best to be as ignorant as possible.
"Jane." Paddy said, "It's time."
She nodded, "It's time."
He held a guiding hand down the stairs and Jane lead the way. One on the first floor they turned towards the library on the right side of the room. Standing outside was another man she was familiar with.
Kieran ran a finger down his scarred face as she approached. It was a nervous gesture. He didn't want to be here but his loyalty to her was all he had left.
"Everyone is inside and accounted for," he said calmly. "There's also a car out back."
"Good work Kieran." She said, "Once it's done, don't waste any time. She'll be coming here to make a statement soon."
He nodded. "I'll take care of it."
She nodded again, "Thank you for staying Kieran. I know what this life was for you and I won't let it be that way again. I promise."
"Aye." He said, "If I thought it was, I'd have put one through my head already."
Shaking her head she growled, "Let's not do that. I need someone I can trust."
Kieran put a hand on the door knob. "You've got me." He twisted and swung the door open.
The group of mobsters, bootleggers and gunzles turned to see her lead the way in with Paddy right behind her. It was unprecedented that Paddy would ever stand behind someone, he always lead the way. It caused more than a few nervous ticks around the room.
"Gentlemen." Paddy's voice boomed as Jane made her way around the men, eyeing each one carefully. "May I present to you the new head of the Doyle Family, my daughter-in-law, Painkiller Jane Rizzoli."
Jane stopped next to a tall man in a brown suit who refused to meet her gaze. A small bead of sweat traced a line down his temple as she glared at him. Without a word, Jane slammed her fist straight into his throat causing him to fall to his knees gasping for air. Jane snatched his head into a headlock and jerked. A loud crunch echoed in the room and met the ears of everybody in attendance.
For a decade Jane Rizzoli was known by the underworld as the uncompromising flat foot who took on the city of Boston's biggest crime lords and now she had just committed a felony in front of all of them, murdered a man without even a word. Jane let him fall unceremoniously to the floor and Kieran rushed in to take the body out.
She looked around the room, "Tonight is New Year's Eve. Tomorrow we will show all the bosses in Boston that our family will rule 1938. I want each one of you to tell the Mob, especially those dirty fucking Italians from the west side that this outfit is run by an Italian, but we will show them that my heart and my love are for the Irish."
There were nods of approval at her words and she could see that she was starting to get to them already. "You all know I was a cop, a detective for Homicide and Organized Crime. I know their ways better than the rest of those cheap tin wielding bastards. You follow me and we will run circles around the Feds. Fuck with me even a little and you pay with your life. Just like that stool pigeon did a minute ago."
"Donnie was stoolie?" One of the men asked in shock. "I can't believe it!"
Jane glared at him, "He's been feeding info to the coppers for six months. Only after I came over did I figure it out." She narrowed her eyes at him, "And don't think for even a second that I don't know how you two were buds. I still have guys on the pad at BPD so if you even squeak a word of this, you'll be the next one I rub out."
He gulped visibly, "Yes, Boss!"
She nodded and Paddy grinned like the proud father he had become. His only daughter married well and now he was certain that his legacy would continue. He watched Jane unbutton her jacket and sit at his desk, like a queen enthroning herself.
As proud as he could possibly be, he came around the desk and stood behind her on her right and rested his arm over the high-backed chair. There were some looks around the room. Paddy had just shown his full confidence in a woman to run his business. It was so unheard of that it had never even been thought of but there it was. Jane arched a regal eyebrow and one by one they cupped their hands in front of themselves and bowed their heads. It was a symbol of loyalty.
"Good." She said. "Then our next piece of business should be walking through that door any minute. No one is to say a word to her."
They all nodded as they heard the main door of the house open and the sound of heavy footfalls rushing to the library. They all knew what was coming. The new Lieutenant was making a statement.
The doors burst open and guns were drawn, not from the mob but from Boston Police.
"Hands up!", "Grab some sky, hoods.", "Stick'em up!" The cops were yelling and again the men in the room complied, all except Jane and Paddy. Paddy merely cupped his loose hand over his wrist and waited. Jane kept her hands in plain sight flat across the desk, her puckered scars plainly visible.
"Make way for the Lieutenant!" Someone shouted and the cops split into two groups away from the door, revealing Boston's new Lieutenant of Homicide and Organized Crime Unit.
Jane rose slowly to her feet as Kate Beckett walked in to the room. Once closer than sisters, now bitter enemies, her best friend stared at her.
"Hello Kate. I've been expecting you." She said calmly.
Kate walked in in full dress uniform. "Hello Jane. I take it your meeting was concluded before my arrival?"
"Actually we were just about to call for some refreshments. Care for a soda?" She said with that old smirk.
"Not really, but if you have a beer…" She shrugged, "I might be interested in that."
"And where it came from no doubt since alcohol is illegal." Jane shook her head, "Check out the shipyards, I hear that some of the christenings are getting light Champaign bottles."
A glare passed between them, "I don't know what made you turn your back on justice and become…" she held out both hands, palms up and indicated the room, "this, but just like we've done together for years, I will find out everything about you, I will run your business into the ground, and then I will put you in a cage or in the ground. " she leveled a thin finger at her, "You were one of us and now you stand on the wrong side of the law. Do not think for even a second that I won't put lead in your skull because we were friends. You break the law and I will put you down."
Jane straightened at the threat, "Even if you had something on me, you couldn't take me and you damn well know it. I'm faster than you and I've always out shot you."
Kate yanked her pistol out of her holster and leveled it at Jane. "Very true, maybe I should just save the courts a little time and pop you right here."
Jane held her hands up, "If you want to pull it, then pull it. But promise me you'll take care of Maura before you do."
Kate stared at her, "You would put that on me? You chose this life Jane, you put her in this position!"
"My life for my family. Take it or leave it." I do what I do, to keep her safe!
It had been years since Jane had spoken to her like that, without words. In truth Kate almost missed it.
Get out of this now!
No. For Maura and for Anthony, I stay.Jane's black eyes went cold then and Kate knew that Painkiller had just taken over Jane.
I can't let that beast live!Kate thought.
Jane watched her make that decision and knew that Kate was going to kill her. She waited for that moment, the moment that would end her life.
My word, Jane, I swear it. Kate's hand tightened on the grip of her pistol.
BANG!
The gunshot startled the whole room as Beckett fell to the floor. The cops turned toward the place in the hallway where the shot had come from. To Jane's horror it was Maura holding the smoking gun. The cops turned and fired at the honey blonde.
"MAURA!" Jane jerked up out of bed and scrambled to yank the covers back, revealing her beautiful fiancé. Maura startled awake saw the half crazed look in Jane's eyes as her lover ran her hands over her body, looking for something.
"Oh my god, you're okay!" Jane said in a full panic. "Are you okay!?"
Maura grabbed her lovers hands tightly, "Jane!"
She stopped and brown met hazel in the dark room. "I'm fine. It was a dream."
Jane collapsed into the bed. Maura pulled the blankets back over them and held her fiancé tightly. "It's okay, Jane. I'm here and I'm unharmed."
Jane sobbed quietly into Maura's golden curls before she spoke. "I was one of those thirties mob bosses, I took over Paddy's gang. I did it to keep you safe and when Kate came in to kill me, you shot her and the cops killed you. It was so real. It was so real! I thought you were dead."
Maura took one of Jane's hands and pressed it between her breasts, "Feel my heart beat. Feel my breath. I'm alive and I'm safe with you."
Jane quieted for a few seconds to verify what Maura was saying. Her relief was tangible. "Oh god, I thought… oh god."
Maura held her tight. "I think it's time to find someone to help you Jane."
"They're getting worse, I know." Jane sniffled, "I… Maura I almost hit my own father."
"I know Jane." She said, "But you didn't. You still have control."
She looked up and Maura could see the fear plain in her dark eyes, "It's getting harder, Maura. I don't want to become It."
"Have you told Kate?" She asked.
Jane shook her head, "I can't. She relies on me to have it under control. I can't break her trust like that."
Maura looked at the clock on the bedside table, "She's your partner and she should know. Besides, she might have some ideas on how to help you."
Jane shook her head. "I'm sorry Maura, I shouldn't have asked you to marry me. I shouldn't put you-"
She was cut off by Maura's lips crashing against her own and Maura's tongue delving into her mouth. It roared in her mind and settled at the contact. Before she even realized it she had pulled Maura on top of her and was grinding her hips against her lover's soft curves.
Maura had only wanted to get her out of that mindset, she hadn't meant to start this again but once they were going it was impossible for them to stop and soon Maura lay breathless against Jane.
Her own skin tingling, she ran her hands over Jane's goose bumped skin as they lay together basking in their incredible after-sex glow. Maura reached up and took Jane's jaw in her hand and turned her to face her.
"Don't you ever apologize for proposing to me again." she said sternly, "I love you and there is nothing in this world that I want more than to be your wife. I chose to be with you because I love you, all of you and this is something that we will get past, like every other obstacle we've ever faced. We can do it together because together there is no mystery we cannot solve."
Jane heard the words and they melted her heart in a way that was uniquely Maura. Despite her flaws, Maura loved her and she could almost believe that they could do it. She nodded and Maura eased her onto her back so she could lie on Jane the way they both liked. Jane sighed as Maura teased her skin with delicate strokes of her fingers. A few minutes later Jane felt Maura's fingers slow to a halt as her betrothed fell asleep. But sleep eluded Jane.