AN: Thanks so much, as always, for yur nice comments and reviews. It means more to me than I could possibly say. Enjoy the chapter :)

xxxxx

As Gibbs headed towards Tony's new room, he couldn't get their earlier conversation out of his head. The younger man had clearly made his feelings known and Gibbs was blatantly ignoring them. Of course, in his own defense, the two times he had left Tony alone previously had both had disastrous consequences, first with Tony being kidnapped and then ending up shot. Still, Senior was now physically detained and under close watch as well. He wouldn't be able to get near his agent, but did Tony want to get to his father? He had no idea what was really going on in Tony's head at the moment and it was worrying him more than a little bit.

He stepped inside Tony's room and found him to be fast asleep with Abby's hippo at his side. He had noted Tony's reaction to the stuffed toy earlier and knew there was likely a story behind it. His thoughts once again went to Senior and what a fool the man was. He was now going to be going to prison and for what? For trying to kill his son who would have bent over backwards and done pretty much anything to have a good relationship with his father. "I'm so sorry all of this happened to you," he whispered as he took a seat next to Tony's bed. He knew that Tony now basically had no family to speak of, at least none that would care about him the way he deserved. But, hopefully, he would be able to help fill that void, if only Tony would let down the walls he had so carefully constructed around himself.

xxxxx

"Don't...Dad please. No...no, don't do it. Let me go! Somebody help me. Help me, boss. Please..."

"Its okay, Tony. Its just a dream. Everything's alright." Gibbs gently rubbed Tony's shoulder as he tried to ease him out of the nightmare.

"Boss?" Tony opened his eyes and looked up at Gibbs then around the room as he tried to get his bearings. His heart was beating rapidly and he kept nervously looking at the doorway, half expecting his father to come into the room to try to kill him again.

"Yeah, I'm here. You're safe, Tony."

Safe. Tony definitely did not feel safe. He wondered if he ever would again. He had basically turned into a nervous wreck, which he hated. Very little had truly scared him in the past. He couldn't stand feeling this way. He gingerly shifted himself into a sitting position and shakily ran his hand back through his hair. "I'm okay now..." His voice had a note of uncertainty in it and Gibbs didn't believe him for a second.

"Tony...talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about. I'm fine." Tony's eyes were roaming about, seemingly looking everywhere except at Gibbs.

"You're not fine."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Tony asked, his face flushing with a sudden burst of anger. "Just because my father's a nutcase, does that make me one too?"

"That's not what I'm saying and you know it.."

"So, what are you saying then?"

"Dammit, Tony. Stop acting like everything is fine, that everything that happened hasn't had an effect on you."

"It hasn't."

"Bullshit. I was there. It sure as hell had an effect on me."

Gibbs' statement caught Tony's attention, in spite of himself. "What do you mean?" he asked softly.

"How do you think it made me feel that he snatched you right from under my nose and then when I find him, I see him trying to choke the life right out of you? Then the bastard shot you. I thought he had killed you, Tony...How the hell did you think I felt when that happened?"

Tony shrugged, bowing his head. "I don't know..."

Gibbs gently grabbed Tony's chin and tilted his head up so that he was forced to look back at Gibbs. "I wanted to pound him within an inch of his life. If it had been anyone else but your father, I don't know what I might have done."

"Yeah, some father..." Tony shook his head. "I don't see what good it will do to keep talking about this. Better just to try to forget it and put it all behind me, isn't it?"

"If it really was that easy, yes, I'd agree with you," Gibbs replied softly, "but, I think we both know that its not."

"I...I can't talk about it," Tony said, looking utterly miserable as he unconsciously pulled Bert into his lap, clutching the stuffed toy tightly against his abdomen.

"I know you don't want to, but you need to try," Gibbs prodded gently. He wished with all his heart he could spare Tony the pain he was going through. "This isn't the first time your father has hurt you, is it?"

Tony lowered his gaze and stared down at the bed. He really didn't want to talk about this. It was much better to keep it tightly bottled up inside. "My stomach hurts," he whispered. "I'm going to lie back down and try to sleep."

"No." Gibbs grabbed Tony's shoulder and for the second time that day saw the younger man flinch away from him.

"Let me go."

"I won't hurt you, Tony." Gibbs released his hold on Tony's shoulder, watching in dismay as he shifted a few inches farther away from Gibbs. The look in Tony's eyes spoke volumes and Gibbs imagined it was a look that DiNozzo Sr. had seen countless times in the past. He couldn't begin to comprehend the cruelty in the man to see a look like that on his own son's face and yet willingly abuse the boy.

"You know I'm not going to hurt you." He very gently placed his hand on Tony's back and began moving it in a slow, soothing motion."Talk to me, Tony."

Tony closed his eyes, allowing himself to relax under Gibbs' comforting touch. Moments of physical affection in his family had always been few and far between. "Its not what you think," he began softly, keeping his eyes tightly closed. Maybe if he didn't actually look at Gibbs, this wouldn't be so difficult. "I...I mean...he hit me, but...it wasn't that often...only if I got him really angry or if he'd been drinking a lot..."

"What about your mother?" Gibbs asked, wondering what it took to make Senior angry, imagining that it hadn't taken much. "Didn't she try to stop him?"

Tony shook his head. "It didn't start until after she died. He started drinking a lot...he seemed to always be angry...like he resented my presence. The first time he hit me...I came home late after school. We'd been playing baseball and I lost track of the time. It was starting to get dark and I knew I was in trouble. He grabbed me just as I was coming in the front door..." His voice caught and he shuddered as he became caught up in the memories. "I was a pretty scrawny kid at that age...I...don't even think he realized his own strength. He...he shoved me against the wall. I hit my head and was pretty dazed. I guess he batted me around some..I don't really remember...I just knew when I woke up I had a really bad headache and a lot of black and blue marks. He was smart though. He never hit me on the face or anywhere that would leave any obvious marks. After that, I tried really hard to be good, but, it didn't really matter whether I was good or not when he went on a drinking binge."

Gibbs was trying with every ounce of willpower he had to control the anger within him. He had always suspected, in fact, had been pretty sure that Tony had been abused as a child, but having it finally confirmed unleashed a whole different kind of fury. The thought of Senior taking out his frustrations on a newly motherless eight-year-old child was almost more than he could bear. He didn't like Tony's phrasing about trying to be good, as if misbehaving somehow justified him being beaten. "You didn't deserve that, Tony...none of that. You know that, don't you? Even if you might have done something wrong?"

Tony cautiously opened his eyes and looked back at Gibbs. "He told me it was my fault...said if I didn't act the way I did he wouldn't be forced to punish me that way.."

"My god, Tony. I am so sorry he put you through that. He had no right. You were a little boy. He should have been loving you and taking care of you, not beating you up...especially after the death of your mother."

"Yeah, well...I learned to deal with it," Tony admitted with a shrug. "Actually... sometimes I would do things wrong on purpose. Talk back to him or deliberately come home late. The old man didn't like defiance. The beatings showed me I had his attention...they were easier to bear than his indifference. Once he started sending me away to boarding school...it only confirmed what I had already knew...that he never really wanted me around..."

Gibbs felt his stomach turn over at the thought that Tony could have deliberately sought out a beating as a means to get attention. The thought horrified him. "I..." He didn't even know how to respond to this. He was beginning to regret every head smack he had ever given his agent, wondering just what the hell was going on in Tony's mind when he gave them. "Tony...the head slaps...I...I'm sorry...if I had known...I..." He shook his head regretfully. "I'm so sorry..."

"Come on, boss," Tony managed to give Gibbs a faint smile. "Trust me...it is not the same thing. Contrary to what you may be thinking about me right now...I am not that fragile."

"Still, I..."

"I've never questioned that you care about me, boss," Tony interrupted. "Please don't start feeling guilty. If I thought that was going to happen, I never would have told you any of this. Apples and oranges...its not the same thing at all."

"Alright...I believe you." Gibbs decided to let it go, at least for the time being. Besides, this wasn't about him. It was about Tony. He decided it was best to let him continue with his story. "How often...how long did the beatings go on for?" he asked quietly.

"Not really all that long. Once I got sent away to school, they pretty much stopped. I got myself invited to the homes of classmates for holidays and vacations. We grew even further apart and it pretty much stayed that way...at least until he showed up at headquarters that day..." Tony had been keeping a very tight hold on his emotions up until this point, but now he was beginning to falter.

"You okay?" Gibbs asked seeing the toll this was beginning to have on Tony. He didn't want to push him too hard.

Tony nodded. "Yeah...yeah, I'm okay." Now that he'd started this, he wanted to finish it. Taking a deep breath, he continued. "Before my dad left...when he told me that he loved me...I really believed it. At least, I wanted to believe it was true. I...I don't even know why he bothered." Tears were beginning to well in his eyes now and he didn't bother to try to hide them. "Why'd he say it when it obviously wasn't true?" he asked, staring back at Gibbs.

The look of pure hurt on Tony's face upset Gibbs more than just a little bit. He wanted to protect the younger man, keeping him from all harm for the rest of his life, but knew that wasn't possible. "I believe he thought it to be true when he said it, Tony," Gibbs answered. "I don't think he was lying."

"Then explain this to me," Tony demanded. "He went to all the trouble of getting the ransom. He could have just said to hell with it, ignored the phone call or whatever, but he got the ransom money. Then he takes me out of the hospital, hires a doctor to take care of me, but then tries to choke me? Then to top it all off he shot me? It makes no sense to me, boss. It doesn't make any sense at all. I don't understand...I don't understand what he did. He never loved me. He never loved me at all, no matter how hard I tried to make him." The tears were flowing freely now. Gibbs had never seen him so young-appearing, looking so upset and totally vulnerable.

Gibbs got up from his chair and sat on the edge of Tony's bed, pulling him into his arms. "It's okay, Tony. Everything's going to be alright," he said, holding his agent tightly as he began to sob against his chest. "You've got to believe me that you did nothing to deserve this. Nothing at all. You were a little boy who was terribly wronged and you deserved so much better than you got. It wasn't your fault, Tony. None of it was your fault."

Tony couldn't even answer Gibbs. Now that the tears had started, he found he was unable to stop them. He cried for the loss of a childhood he had never really had, for a mother taken away too soon and for the father who he now knew, without a shadow of a doubt, didn't give a damn about him and most likely never had. Finally, the tears began to slow. He had exhausted himself. Gibbs continued to cradle him and he made no move to pull away. Part of him was embarrassed that he had broken down the way he had, but the larger part of him just felt protected in a way he really couldn't remember ever feeling before. He knew Gibbs would move heaven and earth to keep him safe and he knew the man cared about him more than anyone else did. Gibbs was rubbing his back in a soothing manner and Tony was on the verge of falling asleep, but he finally realized he needed to pull away and reluctantly broke Gibbs' hold on him. "Sorry boss..." he whispered as he pulled out of Gibbs' arms, unable to even look up at him.

"You've got nothing to be sorry about. That's something I think you've needed to do for a long time. It's a good thing, Tony. I'm proud of you."

A glimmer of a smile touched Tony's lips as he listened to Gibbs' words. There was no one he wanted to make proud more than this man. There was no one he respected more. "I don't know what to do now..." Tony admitted softly. "I...he was my only real family...I...I don't know...what should I do?"

"Tony? Tony, look at me,"Gibbs ordered gently. The lost look in Tony's eyes was tearing at his heart. "You are my son. Not by blood, but in every other way that matters. I am your family. Ducky, Abby, Tim and Ziva...they are your family too. Its not blood that matters. Its the way you feel about someone that makes them family...real family. You've got to let him go, son. It won't be easy but you've got to try to move on. I'll help you in every way that I can."

Tony felt himself tear up again when Gibbs called him son. God, he was such a mess. "I'm going to have to face him...I...I have to do it."

"Not yet though, Tony. It's been a hell of a day. Right now you need to rest," Gibbs said apprehensively. He didn't like it, but he realized it was something Tony needed to do. He would try to hold him off for as long as he could. He just hoped that when the time came, Tony would be strong enough to face his father without getting hurt in the process...

xxxxx

AN2: I really hope that wasn't too sappy, but I thought Tony needed to have an emotional release after all he's been through. Thanks for reading :)