The Light In Your Eyes

by Maddylovesyou

A light that is so precious. A light that brings hope and can change any situation from dire to okay. A light that one would kill for. Killua would certainly kill for him.

18. Chapter 18

Killua sits on the hotel bed, his cheeks still a soft pink and his heart beating faster than it should. His heart rate has been up ever since morning came, knowing what today is and what he's going to do. Killua spent a good couple of hours cooking all that food, and let him just say he made a huge mess that he is not going to clean up. It took him awhile but he made sure everything would taste good. He wanted Gon to wake up and have something delicious to eat. He wanted the day to start perfect.

After he cooked all the food he changed into this outfit that he's had picked out for a couple of days. He wanted to look good, really good. And the way Gon looked at him when he came in...

Killua puts a hand over his heart. He can hear the shower turn off in the bathroom. I have to calm down. Everything is going good. Gon loved the food I made and he looked so happy. Gon said I look beautiful, he noticed that this isn't how I normally dress or act. I'm making progress. Don't freak out...don't freak out...

But what has got him flustered right now is not the date coming up. No. It's Gon. Killua plays with his pants, feeling too warm when he thinks about how Gon took his fingers into his mouth to eat the macaroon...Killua wanted to get closer so he licked Gon's cheek, near his mouth...The feelings of want he felt were nothing compared to when Gon had leaned closer, telling him he had something on his lips. He leaned so close. Killua really thought Gon was going to kiss him. His heart was in his throat, his body so hot and all the while he could only think about how he waited so long for this-

Then Gon pulled away, smiling at him. Gon teased him. Killua is sure of it. Gon was teasing him...and that thought for some reason makes his pants feel tight. Innocent Gon teasing him, leaning so close and then pulling away in the most painful way. Those amber eyes had a hint of mirth to them.

Why the hell am I reacting to that? Am I really a masochist? Killua groans, willing his excitement to go away. The good thing about these pants is that despite how tight they are, they restrict his manhood, keeping a boner pretty concealed. He'll need that. He has a feeling he's going to get excited more than once, especially if Gon teases him again.

Focus. Killua takes a deep breath, smacking his face, willing his cheeks to cool down. Everything is going good. It's going to be fine. You're being smooth Zoldyck. Keep It that way. You made him breakfast in bed. He loved it. He loves you. Don't lose your cool. You're hot and Gon thinks so too. Just work with it...just go with it.

Killua forces his face to go blank as the bathroom door opens. He looks over towards Gon coolly only for his eyes to widen when he takes him in. Oh no. Gon walks out of the bathroom, his smile bright and those amber eyes have this shine to them. He has on blue jeans with a green plaid button up shirt, a black shirt underneath. Gon looks...really cute. No. He has to be honest. Gon looks hot. The button up shirt hugs his body nicely, not leaving much to the imagination, his tan muscular arms exposed. The outfit looks nice on him. Killua can tell he took time picking it out. He usually doesn't wear something like this or takes the time to match up an outfit.

Gon is wearing this for him. And that thought alone gets his heart to pick back up speed and his cheeks to heat up. He swallows. Keep cool. Don't do anything weird. Killua blinks when he catches his eyes wondering over Gon's body.

"You ready?" Killua grins when Gon makes eye contact with him, proud of himself with how steady his voice came out as he jumps off the bed, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Yup!"Gon's amber eyes light up. He shifts from foot to foot, something Gon does when he's excited. "Where are we going Killua?"

"You'll see." Killua winks. His grin twitches. In a date he knows you're suppose to acknowledge how your date looks. Killua feels nervous but he keeps it out of his face when Gon moves closer to him. "You look...really good." Killua flushes when Gon looks at him with those big eyes, his smile getting bigger.

"I do? You like the outfit?" Gon does a twirl, chuckling. God, he's adorable.

"Yeah." Killua swallows. I want to kiss him. Killua can still remember how Gon's breath felt on his lips when he leaned so close. Keep calm. Not yet. "So lets go." Killua walks towards the hotel door, keeping his hands in his pockets, hoping his face is blank and he's not looking as nervous as he feels. Why am I freaking out? Gon said he loved me last night. Gon wanted to kiss me. I know Gon thinks I'm hot. It's just a date...It's just like a normal hang out day.

"Can you give me a hint on where we're going?" Gon smiles over at Killua. The ex-assassin tenses only to relax when Gon hugs his arm, hanging off of him.

"Nope. We're going to a lot of places." Killua opens the hotel door, both of the boys walking out together. He takes his hand out of his pocket so instead of Gon hanging on him he's able to wrap his arm around him, resting his hand on his waist. That feels better...more comfortable.

"Should we say goodbye to Leorio and Kurapika?" Gon glances down the hall towards their friend's room.

"Nah they're probably both still asleep or dealing with a bad case of hangover. I'm surprised that you don't have one. You made out pretty well for your first time." Killua grins, leading Gon down the stairs, the other male's arm finding its way around his waist, both of the boys holding each other. "Even though you said some pretty weird things last night~" Killua watches as Gon looks at him in curiosity, Killua's smile is teasing.

"I did? What did I say?" Gon tilts his head.

"For one you told me I look like a cat." Killua chuckles, thinking about it.

"I did?" Gon think about it before he laughs. "Well you do kind of remind me of one when I think about it!"

"And you kept hanging on me, I couldn't even order the food without you worrying about me leaving." Killua smirks but really he thought that was so cute. It made his heart flutter.

"Oh." Gon's cheeks tint, this look flashing through his eyes. "Did I do anything else weird?"

"I want to make Killua all red and kiss him like that..."

Killua gets warm and his mouth dry when he thinks of Gon trying to kiss him, wanting to kiss him last night.

"Nope. Not really." Killua shrugs it off. He won't bring that up or the fact that Gon said he loves him. He doesn't want to embarrass him. Killua is really happy he said all those things. He doesn't want Gon to get nervous and not kiss him today.

"Okay." Gon seems to be relieved, his smile coming back to his face. "Was I the first one out of the game? I can't remember."

"No, I say Kurapika was but you were the second one out." Killua chuckles at the pout on Gon's face as they make it down the stairs and out of the hotel.

"Wow it's so nice out!" Gon cheers, letting go of Killua to spread his arms out, looking towards the sky, those amber eyes sparkling.

"it is." Killua smiles, watching Gon's expression before looking at the sky. It really is. It's nice and warm and the sky is clear, a light blue. There's a breeze that keeps the temperature from being too hot. It's perfect. Killua can feel it. Today, he's going to show and express his feelings to Gon.

"Should I call a cab?" Gon starts to dig for his phone only for Killua to wave him off.

"Nope. We don't need one." When Gon gives him a confused look, Killua can't help to grin. He grabs Gon's hand and starts to run, pulling him along to the hotel's garage. Gon keeps up with him, those eyes curious and his smile playful and excited. Killua stops, letting go of Gon's hand to present what he's brought Gon to.

"The rent a car?" Gon blinks, taking in the black car that's parked where Leorio put it last. "But I thought Leorio wasn't coming with us?"

"He's not." Killua smirks, watching as Gon's eyebrows scrunch in confusion.

"Then how are we going to get around?"

"We're going to drive." Killua's smile is cat like as he takes out keys from his pocket, jiggling them in front of Gon's face. The raven haired male's eyes get wide like an owl, bright and excited and curious.

"Ne Really?! Leorio said we could? But we don't have our licensees!" Despite saying this, Gon looks interested.

"License, pffff. We don't need a license to drive a car. I've driven an air craft by myself before and I've driven a car before. It's not hard at all. And sure, Leorio said we could." Killua can't stop his cat like smile. He stole the keys from Leorio's room earlier this morning. He knew if he asked Leorio he would never give him the keys. Leorio would have told him to just use a cab. But Killua didn't want to do that.

In all the romantic movies he's seen, the guy has a nice car that he uses to drive the girl around and take her where ever she wants to go. It just seems like a better option to have a car. It's more of an adult thing. And it's exciting and new. As soon as he saw Gon's eyes light up he knew he made the right decision.

"Come on lets go." Killua grins as he opens up the driver door and hops in. Gon moves to get into the passenger seat. He gets in, looking over at Killua will his eyebrows furrowed.

"Are you sure it's okay?"

"Positive." Killua smiles reassuringly. He grins when Gon's excitement takes over and he punches his fist in the air.

"Then lets go! Can I drive after you?"

"Sure. Why not?" Killua grins as he puts the keys into the ignition. He turns on the motor. Killua wasn't lying when he said he's driven a car before. He did when he was...5? Or was it 6? He had seen the car while working and he just wanted to play around a bit. He may have crashed that car but Killua's sure his driving skills have improved since then. He's played plenty of racing games. Driving can't be that hard.

Killua puts the car into drive before pulling out of the parking space and driving out of the garage. So far so good. This is a piece of cake. Killua smirks. This is going to be so much fun.

"Hey Killua, I think you were suppose to stop back there." Gon tilts his head, looking back at a Stop sign Killua ignored.

"Eh no one was coming." Killua shrugs as he turns onto the main high way. "Hey Gon, do you want to see how fast this baby can go?" Killua grins over at Gon. Even though this is a date, Killua feels most comfortable like this. They're acting like two teenage boys. Being reckless and trying new things. He'll work himself up to the lovey dovey stuff but this is what they do. This is Gon and Killua having fun.

"Sure!" Gon's eyes get wide when Killua steps on the gas, the car jerking forward before speeding down the high way. Killua weaves his way through the cars, the two boys laughing from the rush it's giving them.

Back in the hotel Leorio's eye twitches. He has a bad feeling in the pit of his wallet but he ignores it, blaming it on his pounding head.

"Wooo!" Gon cheers when they go over a hill, the car lifting off the ground before crashing down. "That was awesome!"

"Right?" Killua chuckles, slowing the car down when he sees his first stop. He pulls into the parking lot and parks in the first spot he sees. Smooth. Killua takes the keys out before looking over at Gon who is still smiling from the fun they just had. The ex-assassin admires his friend for a moment before he notices the bandage on Gon's wrist. He frowns. He had forgotten about Gon's injury. He's been planning this date and making sure he's gotten everything right that he over looked that detail. "How does your wrist feel?"

"Hm?" Gon glances over at Killua, taking his eyes off the building in front of them. He blinks before looking down at his wrist. "Oh this! It doesn't hurt. It feels itchy some times though."

"That's probably because it's healing. When we get back later tonight we'll get Leorio to clean it up." Killua puts the keys in his pocket before he gets out of the car, Gon following suit.

"Yeah I'm not worried about it." Gon runs over to be where Killua is. He grabs Killua's hand, no hesitation at all. There's this resolve in his eyes that gets Killua to flush, his heart beating faster. "So what is this place?"

"It's the arcade." Killua mumbles as he interlaces their fingers, loving the feeling, loving this moment. Gon is making a lot of the first moves. Stop being so stiff! How are you going to show Gon you love him if you're having trouble just holding his hand?!

"Cool!" Gon's eyes light up and he starts to run towards the building, pulling Killua along. "I hope Kurapika and Leorio don't get too jealous that we're going to the arcade without them!"

"Pff who cares? Those old people wouldn't appreciate it anyway." Killua grunts as he runs with Gon, smiling as he watches Gon's happy expression. Gon is having fun. It's going good. I just have to be more forward. Flirt with him...I know how to flirt with people I don't really like so why is it so hard to flirt with Gon? Someone I actually like? Someone I love? I know how to act like I like someone to get what I want so why am I all choked up with it comes to Gon?

Because Killua cares about what Gon thinks. Gon makes him nervous and excited and he makes him feel alive. Gon is his everything. He doesn't want to screw this up.

"They're not that much older than us Killua." Gon shakes his head as they walk into the arcade. Gon's eyes widen as he takes in all the machines and the people and the sounds and smells. There's flashing lights everywhere and people talking over the clangs and bangs of the games. "Wow look at all this. It's been awhile since we're been to an arcade."

"Yeah a couple of years. That arcade sucked compared to this one though. It only had like 5 games." Killua's eyes glint as he takes in all the games to play before he grins at Gon. "After you."

"Why thank you." Gon does a curtsy, chuckling before he walks ahead of Killua, the ex-assassin laughing. "Such a gentleman."

"Yeah I just got those skills." Killua shoves his hands into his pockets. Joking around like this is easy and fun but at the same time it worries him. What if Gon won't take him seriously? Killua's just playing around now to ease the mood but...what if when he tries to make a move Gon thinks he's playing around? What if by the end of this, Gon doesn't even know this is a date? What if he's doing this all wrong?-

"Killua? Are you okay?" Gon waves a hand in his face. "Your eyes got out of focused."

"Ah." Killua pulls himself together, giving Gon a smile. It feels strained, even to him. "It was nothing uh...um..." Killua swallows. What the hell is wrong with me?! This is the opposite of being cool! I'm stuttering! "So lets play some games!" Killua punches his hands in the air, chuckling awkwardly as he quickly makes his way towards the money machine. His palms feel sweaty.

"Killua?" Gon catches up to him, watching him curiously as he sticks some money into the machine and gets a bunch of tokens to use.

"So what do you want to play first?" Killua stuffs the tokens into his jacket pocket, smiling over at Gon, ignoring his questioning look.

Gon stares at him for a moment before he looks around the arcade. "That!" Gon's eyes light up as he points at a large screen that plays a clip of zombies walking in the street, coming towards the screen only to be shot. There's two fake guns in front of it. A shooter game.

"Alright." Killua relaxes, following Gon as the two of them make their way over to the game. He's glad Gon let it go. Killua's still feeling kind of panicked. What if I made this day too much like a regular hang out day for friends?

"This is kind of like the game we played back at the other arcade except it's zombies instead of dinosaurs." Gon grins as Killua puts in the tokens, enough for them both to play. "I think i'll like this one better."

"Yeah you love zombie movies." Killua can't help to grin at that. "When ever we would get TV you would want to watch 'the walking dead' show."

"Oh yeah! I haven't seen that in forever." Gon's eyes light up at the mention of that. They both grab their guns. The screen changes to an old house. Zombies are walking from the left and right. Gon and Killua start to shoot at the screen. Killua keeps getting head shots. After all the zombies are killed, their characters move deeper into the house.

There's a woman laying on the ground, an obvious bite mark on her hand. There's a man holding her crying.

"Oh no, he better get away. She's going to turn." Gon frowns when he tries to shoot but it's not letting him. This is a cut scene.

The woman's eyes open wide and she leans up biting the man's face and ripping off a chunk of him. Gon gasps, dropping his gun. The woman gets up and it's time to shoot. Killua shoots at her but she's a tough one. She's getting closer. He's the only one shooting. When Killua looks over at Gon, the other male is staring at the screen with wide eyes, this distant look to those amber orbs. "Hey Gon!"

Gon's eyes refocus and he grabs his gun and starts to shoot. Its too late though. The women ends up killing them. The screen now shows 'continue?' and numbers counting down.

"What was that about?" Killua glances over at Gon, noting the slight tensing of his shoulders.

"Eh." Gon shrugs his shoulders, those amber eyes searching the arcade. "Let's play another game Killua! How about ski ball?" Gon smiles at him before he grabs his hand and leads him over to the game.

Killua doesn't say anything, letting the other male lead him. Once again Gon is the one who made the first move. He grabbed his hand. Killua tries to not focus on that though. He can't keep worrying. He has to make the best of what he's planned and try to make this more like a date. Killua still can't help to wonder why Gon froze like that. For a moment he looked in pain...Is his wrist bothering him more than he let on? Or maybe the woman attacking the man bothered him? Gon was never one for blood and gore. He's never reacted like that though.

"Hey Killua. If I was bitten by a zombie what would you do?"

"Huh?" Killua blinks, looking over at Gon once they got to the ski ball machine. Gon looks back at him. "That's a weird question."

"I know but just think. What if a virus got out and somehow I got bitten. What would you do?" Gon tilts his head.

Killua thinks about it. He frowns. "I don't know. Honestly, my first thought would be to cut off the part of your body that was infected. Hoping that would stop it from spreading and from turning you into a zombie."

"Yeah you would think that would work. In a lot of the movies it doesn't though." Gon holds out his hand and Killua gives him tokens. He puts some into the machine and balls come out for him to roll.

"Yeah I know. It's just movies though. If there was really some virus, if you reacted fast enough, i'm sure you could stop it from spreading." Killua puts some tokens in the machine next to Gon. They start to roll the balls, both playing the game side by side. Killua gets a ball in the 100,000 slot. There's silence between them. Killua bites his lip. Why does it feel awkward? Am I making it awkward? Why is this so hard?-

"Yes!" Gon cheers when he gets his ball into the highest slot. "I got it." Gon grins over at Killua, that weird look in his eyes gone, those amber eyes shinning. "I got a bunch of tickets too! Look." Gon points at the tickets that are flowing out of the machine. It looks like he got about 20.

Killua blinks when he realizes he's out of balls and there's only a couple of tickets sticking out of his machine. He's been rolling them this whole time and he didn't even notice because he's been thinking too much...

"Haha I got more than you Killua!" Gon teases.

"Shut up. You just got lucky. I'll get more than you on the next one." Killua huffs.

"You're on!" Gon chuckles as he looks around the room. His eyes fall on something that makes his eyes light up. Killua isn't paying attention to the games though. His blue orbs are locked on Gon. His mind working on overdrive. He wants to be closer. He wants to express his feelings...he can do it later but he's feeling anxious now. Killua glances down at Gon's hand. It looks empty and there. I can start by doing something small and working my way up...yeah. Killua reaches over and grabs Gon's hand. The raven haired male blinks before looking over at Killua. The ex-assassin flushes only for his heart to flutter when Gon beams at him, interlacing their fingers.

"Let's play all the games here! The one who has the most tickets wins! If I win you owe me but if you win..." Gon moves closer, their chests almost touching, he can feel Gon's breath on his face. "I owe you." Gon's lips are so close to his own, his voice getting lower in a way that makes Killua's toes curl. The ex-assassin stares at Gon with wide eyes as he pulls away, giving him a wink. Killua gulps, his pants once again getting tight today. He bites the inside of his cheek, fighting the urge to just tackle Gon to the ground and kiss him senseless. Gon is teasing him. He's trying to seduce him and it's working.

Killua's mind is spinning. What does that mean? He'll owe me?...If I win will he kiss me? If I lose do I have to kiss him? Or is it something more...dirty? Killua's mind can't help to wonder at all the possibilities of what he could get from winning.

"On the count of three we're going to try to get as many tickets as possible!" Gon's smile turns more playful. "One, two, three!-"

Killua has never moved so fast in his life. He runs through all the games and plays the best he can, his body alert and moving efficiently while his mind is a swarm of emotions. He wants to win. Really badly. Gon's got him all worked up. It's suppose to be the other way around damn it!...but the way Gon said he would owe him...how those amber eyes got half lidded, showing an emotion that Killua hasn't seen before in them...

It turned him on greatly and now he just really wants to find out what Gon will owe him. He plays these games like his life depended on it.

---

"Wow I still can't believe you got almost a million tickets Killua!" Gon beams over at Killua as they walk out of the arcade together. The ex-assassin's fingers hurt from playing so many games. "I was only able to get 50,000." Gon pouts, looking sore about losing.

"Like I said I have skills." Killua grins, just now calming down from the frenzy Gon put him in. He was going crazy in there. Gon didn't see him but he may have shoved a couple of kids out of his way to get on a game. He didn't let anyone get in his way. Killua flushes, now that he's calmed down, embarrassed from his actions. Hey, it's not his fault. He's young and his hormone levels were off the charts. Killua's heart starts to pick up speed when he realizes something. He won. He swallows. "...I won."

"Yup. So I owe you." Gon smiles over at Killua, those eyes holding a different emotion when he sees Killua's flushed cheeks.

"...What do you owe me?" Killua kicks at the ground as they walk back to the car. Looking anywhere but at the boy next to him.

"You'll see." Gon winks at him, getting Killua's face to catch on fire and he sputters. "Tonight."

Tonight? What does that mean? This is innocent Gon...remember that Killua. You're just a pervert. Maybe he means he's going to kiss him tonight? Killua's heart beats faster. The options are endless and it's only getting him more excited-

Focus on the here and now. You have a date to give him. Make this good. Show him how much you care for him. That's the point in all this. Killua takes a deep breath before he reaches over and grabs Gon's hand, relaxing when Gon interlaces their fingers.

"That was a lot of fun." Gon hums as they walk to the car. "What are we going to do next?"

"We've been out for almost four hours now. Are you hungry?" Killua opens the car door for Gon. That's something couples do right? Gon doesn't say anything about it as he gets into the car and Killua closes the door for him. Killua gets into the car, putting the keys in.

"Not really but I can eat if you are." Gon smiles down at the stuffed rabbit-squirrel Killua had spent his tickets on in the arcade. Killua had given it to him and Gon has been smiling down at it and squeezing it ever since. Killua's heart flutters. It aches. He just wants to kiss those cute lips.

"Nah. Let's go see a movie. The new 'Insidious' is out." Killua says casually as he pulls out of the parking space and drives out of the parking lot and into the road once again. Gon isn't hungry so they'll save the romantic dinner for later. A movie is good. Gon will be scared too and It's dark in there...He can cuddle up next to him and they can share a popcorn. It seemed romantic in his head.

"Okay!" Gon's eyes light up. "After the movie can I drive?"

"Sure." Killua grins. It will be amusing seeing Gon drive for the first time.

"Thanks for the stuffed animal." Gon smiles, those amber eyes bright. "You've been really nice to me today Killua. I can't help but notice."

"That's just in your head." Killua teases but he can't help his lips turning in a smile. That's good. Gon has noticed that something is different.

"No way. First the food and then the arcade. You've been acting sweet too." Gon smiles to himself, those amber orbs deep in thought. "I'm going to have to do something to pay you back."

"There's no need-" Killua starts.

"No I want to. When we get a chance, I want to take you out too Killua." Gon reaches over and grabs his hand. Gon pulls his hand up to his lips before he kisses the back of it.

Killua swerves, almost hitting the car next to him. His heart did a little flip at such a sweet gesture. That was bold. Gon is being bold today. It's like Gon is courting him and not the other way around!

"Would you like that Killua?" Gon tilts his head, an amused smile on his lips. Killua can't help to pout, his heart beating faster.

Is he doing this on purpose?! It's like he knows that he's making him hot and bothered.

"Y-Yeah." Killua swallows, trying to focus on the road. I need to turn this around. Gon's been teasing me. I'm sure of it. Killua grips the steering wheel. He thinks of something that he could say or do that would make Gon blush or that will tease him.

The more he tries to think, the more panicked he gets. He takes a deep breath before he glances over at Gon, hoping by looking at the boy it will give him more of a hint. Gon is staring out of the window, his amber eyes dull and his face blank. He's scratching at his bandage. Killua frowns. That's the second time Killua has seen that look in his eyes.

"Gon you shouldn't be scratching your wrist." Killua reaches over and grabs Gon's hand to stop him. Gon blinks, that look leaving his eyes as he looks over at Killua.

"Oh sorry. It itches sometimes. I didn't' know I was scratching." Gon smiles sheepishly.

"Are you feeling okay? You've been spacing out." Killua looks back at the road once he realized he was moving over into the other lane. He gets a couple of people beeping at him which he responds by giving them his middle finger.

"I'm fine." Gon smiles reassuringly. "I just get too much into my head." Gon looks out of the window, Killua can't see his face anymore. "I wonder what Kurapika and Leorio are doing?"

"Probably fucking." Killua grunts. He notices Gon's arms get covered in goosebumps. Killua raises his eyebrow, noting that.

"They do it a lot." Gon flushes, looking back over at Killua. " when you're a couple are you suppose to do it a lot?"

"You can if you want to but it's not a requirement." Killua keeps his eyes on the road. He can feel those beautiful curious eyes on him. "They're just starting out on their relationship. So they're going to fuck a lot." Killua glances over and notes Gon's shoulders tensing, the slight twitch of his eyebrow.

"So when you start off on a relationship you do it a lot?" Gon twiddles his fingers. Killua's starting to feel more confident. Gon is flustered talking about this. Killua can get the upper hand and he thinks he may have just found a weakness.

"It depends on the couple and their stamina and sex drive. If both of those are high, they'll probably fuck a lot." Killua smirks when he sees Gon shiver. Does him saying fuck have some effect on him? Killua almost wants to check, to let his eyes wonder to Gon's lower regions but he doesn't'.

"You're saying that word a lot." Gon mumbles, his cheeks flushed.

"What word? Fuck?" Killua grins when Gon's shoulders tense.

"Yeah." Gon fiddles with his fingers. He's too cute.

"Problem?"

"No...I guess I'm just not use to you saying it." Gon chuckles, rubbing the back of his head. He thinks for a moment. "Hey Killua?"

"Yeah?" Killua watches Gon from the corner of his eye. They're almost at the movies. Good thing Killua spend hours looking up all the directions to these places or they would be so lost right now.

"When you get into a relationship with that girl are you going to want to do it all the time?"

Killua sputters once again almost getting into an accident. His heart beats quickly in his chest and his stomach twists. That's right...Gon still thinks I love some girl. Killua feels guilty as he glances over at Gon to see the raven haired male is staring at him. He doesn't look upset. Just curious.

Killua thinks about the question. When I'm in a relationship with Gon will I want to do it all the time?... An image flashes in his mind of Gon laying on the bed, naked, his mouth open wide in pleasure, those amber eyes watery and calling out for more.

Killua swallows. Yes. Yes he would want to do it all the time. Killua is sure that the first time he does it with Gon will have him instantly addicted.

"Maybe." Killua blushes darkly. "But I'd wait till she's ready before I try that." Even though Killua is as horny as can be and would gladly please Gon day in and out, he still sees Gon as Innocent. He doesn't want to take that away too quickly. He doesn't want Gon thinking he just wants him for sex. That's not the case. Killua could be content with just knowing that Gon loves him. They wouldn't even have to do it.

He just wants to be Gon's one and only.

Gon's face is red as he looks away to look out the window. Killua frowns. Is he getting upset? I have to remember he thinks I love someone else. I know how much that hurts. Killua bites his lip. He wants to just say 'you know that girl is you right?' but right now doesn't seem like the right time to tell him he's the girl that Killua 'might' want to have sex with all the time.

"Hey Killua...you know the guy I like?" Gon pulls at his jeans.

"Yeah?" Killua straightens himself out, seeing the movie theater coming up. His ears are perked up.

"I wonder if he would want to be on the top?" Gon tilts his head.

Killua finally gets into the parking lot and parks. His head hits the wheel, his body going through too much of an overload right now. He said it so innocently too. As soon as those words left Gon's lips, Killua's whole body got even warmer.

In all of Killua's fantasies, he's been the one on top, pounding into Gon. Killua has always seen himself as being the dominant in the bedroom, just because Gon is clueless about sex and how cute he is.

Of course being that Killua never thought that he would actually get to date Gon or have the chance to have sex with him, he never thought of what Gon's preference would be. Would Gon mind being on the bottom? Or does he want to top?

Killua can feel the steam coming out of his head. It's too much. He's close to just fainting.

"Uh Killua are you okay?" Gon shakes the ex-assassin frowning. "Was that a really weird question or something?"

"N-No." Killua pulls himself together, sitting back. His face feels too warm. "It just took me off guard...um...why do you ask? Do you want to be on top?" Killua swallows.

"Hm? I'm not really sure. I think I would have to try both." Gon says bluntly.

Killua knows for a fact he has a hard on right now.

"Okay. Let's go watch a movie." Killua chuckles nervously, getting out of the car, feeling too hot in that close space with Gon.

"I don't think I've ever gone to the theater to see a movie." Gon stares up at the large building when he gets out, Killua grateful that Gon has either gotten distracted with somethings else or has decided to change the subject.

"Me either." Killua walks towards the building with Gon by his side. His fingers twitch in his pockets before he reaches over and grabs Gon's hand. "We've really been non stop working since getting out of the hunter exam. This is the first time that we've actually gotten to relax and to do...normal things."

"Yeah I know. I'm starting to miss it." Gon says honestly, staring up at the theater. "Don't get me wrong this vacation is a lot of fun it's just..."

"You're anxious on finding Ging." Killua smiles to himself, knowing the other male too well. He's never been one to sit still for that long.

"Yeah." Gon nods.

"Well we don't have too much longer with this vacation. We have less than 2 weeks left." Killua rubs his thumb against Gon's hand as they walk into the theater. They get into line for tickets. "Then we'll be out looking for Ging again."

"Yeah that's true." Gon smiles, that determined look in his eyes as he squeezes Killua's hand. "Tomorrow we should train together Killua."

"Sounds good to me." Killua grins, liking this. The ease of talking to Gon right now. The closeness he feels with him. It's like they could talk about anything and just enjoy each others company.

The line moves pretty quickly and before Killua knows it, they're in the front. He asks for two tickets to 'insidious 3', pays the man, takes his tickets and then leads Gon over to get into line for snacks. "Ugh there's a line for everything." Killua groans.

"It's not that bad." Gon chuckles, his eyes lighting up when he sees all the snacks. "We should get mike and ikes! Ohh and popcorn!"

"What do you think this is? Of course we're getting pop corn." Killua ruffles Gon's hair, feeling playful. "Anything you want, you can get. I'm paying."

"Are you sure? You've paid for the arcade and the tickets. I'll pay for the snacks-"

"No it's fine. I want to." Killua waves him off.

Gon stares at him for a moment before a smile comes to his lips. It takes his breath away. Gon is staring at him with those amber eyes, full of admiration and a deeper emotion. He's letting his feelings show. Killua can almost see it in his eyes. Love. Care. Affection. It makes Killua's heart skip a beat.

"Thank you." Gon leans in, Giving Killua a kiss on the cheek. It was so sweet and sudden that his mind short circuits for a moment. His heart pounding in his chest. He can only stare at Gon with wide eyes, his face red.

"Oh my gosh!" Killua snaps out of it when he hears feminine squeals behind him. He glances back only to see a group of girls gushing over them. "They're the cutest gay couple I've ever seen!"

"You know I can hear you right?" Killua growls at the shameless girls, his eyes narrowing at them. They squeak and back off.

"They think we are a couple?" Gon looks amused and a bit happy too.

"Yeah they're just a bunch of creepers. Gon don't pay any mind to them."

"They seem nice." Gon smiles to himself. "I have to agree. I think we would be the cutest gay couple ever."

"W-What?" Killua looks over at Gon with wide eyes. Gon just stares, completely acting like he didn't just say that.

"Oh look it's our turn to order!" Gon smiles innocently.

"Don't act like you didn't just say that Freeces!" Killua huffs, feeling irritated with how Gon can just send him on an emotional roller coaster just to back off. He's done it before, acting like he's going to kiss him and now he's doing it with this.

Gon snickers. He actually fucking snickers. He knows what he's doing. "We'll have a large popcorn and mike and ikes. Two large cokes too." Gon orders, ignoring him.

"You just said we would make a cute couple." Killua flushes, but he's pushing it. "The cutest couple. What about this guy you like huh?" This isn't how I should be approaching this! I'm coming off as confrontational!

Gon hums, bouncing up and down, moving his hips from side to side. He's still ignoring him! And to make matters worse he's wiggling that nice plump ass of his. Killua feels frustration, a tension building up inside him. He doesn't like being ignored. Especially when he knows Gon is doing it on purpose.

"Gon I know you heard me." Killua's eyes narrow.

"Here's your popcorn, your candy and your drinks. That will be 30,000j." The woman comes back with their food, smiling.

Gon looks back at Killua. His eyes closed in his smile. "Killua you said you got this right?"

Killua's fingers twitch. He's not making eye contact with him and he's smiling all sweetly. Killua pays the woman, Gon grabbing the sodas while Killua grabs the candy and popcorn. "This movie is going to be good."

"Gon don't ignore me. You can't just say something like that and then act like you didn't." Killua's eyes narrow again as they walk towards the different theaters. They turn and walk down this hallway looking for the threater number 7. There's no one down here but them.

"I don't know what you're talking about-" Killua can't take it anymore. He calmly places down the candy and the popcorn. He grabs Gon's shoulder, stopping him from walking.

"Stop it." Killua grabs the sodas and places them down. "Now answer me Gon."

"Killua if we wait out here we're going to be late for the movie-"

Killua finds himself pushing Gon against the wall, pinning him to it. "You said we'd make a cute couple Gon. Explain yourself. That's a strange thing to say about your best friend isn't it?" Stop. You're coming on too strong. Calm down, let him come to you. Don't push it.

"We would make acute couple. At least I think so." Gon smiles, there's a tinge on his cheeks. "I didn't repeat myself because it seemed to bother you-"

"It didn't bother me! I just..." Killua flushes, realizing he just sort of attacked Gon. He lets him go and backs up. He rubs the back of his head.

"it's okay Killua. I understand." Gon smiles sweetly. Killua feels his heart sink as Gon walks away from him. "I know you like girls-"

Killua's stomach twist at that. A rage fills him, a deep anger towards himself. Killua didn't even give Gon a chance to think Killua loves him. The ex-assassin has always been acting as if he's straight and then he talked about this 'girl' he loves. Killua has been hurting Gon all this time. No wonder he hasn't wanted to come out to him. Why would he? When he thinks I'm straight?

"I don't like girls!" Killua finds himself shouting, much louder than he was expecting. He reaches out and grabs Gon's wrist, out of reflex, not wanting him to walk away from him anymore.

"...What?" Gon looks back at Killua, his eyes wide.

"I-I..." Killua swallows. He feels too warm ,his lips are trembling. "I don't...I don't like girls...I'm..." Killua can't get the words out. Gon is staring at him with those amber eyes.

"But you're in love with a girl?" Gon tilts his head but his eyes are slowly lighting up.

"I've been lying to you." Killua closes his eyes. He grips Gon's wrist. "I don't love some girl... I love-" Killua looks up only to see Gon's eyes. Wide and eager, his whole face lighting up. Killua chokes on his words. He can't say it. Killua starts to panic. There's a group of people gathered around now watching them. Killua just wants to crawl into a hole and die. This isn't how he wanted today to go. But of course he had to push Gon. He couldn't have let it go. Killua feels like he's about to cry. He can't say it. He's frozen. This isn't cool. Not cool at all-

"Let's go see that movie Killua." Gon smiles gently, getting Killua to blink. He leans down and picks up the food, handing Killua the sodas. Gon softly pushes Killua along, leading him into the theater. Killua's eyes remain wide as Gon leads him into the dark theater and into a seat near the front. He sits down in his seat and then it finally hits him.

Gon let him go. He didn't push him for answers. He saw he was distressed and he didn't push it. He saved him from embarrassment. Killua's heart beats slowly. Gon Is really Kind. A really good friend. If Killua was in Gon's shoes, he doesn't know if he could just let Gon go. Especially if he thought Gon was about to say he loves him. Gon really is something else.

Killua glances over to see Gon eating popcorn. Gon must sense him looking because he turns his head and smiles back at Killua. Patient, kind. No sign of anger or frustration.

"Gon...I'll tell you about it later." That's all Killua can manage. Gon nods in understanding before he reaches over and holds Killua's hand. The ex-assassin relaxes in the kind gesture, squeezing his hand, smiling at his friend. His heart beats calmly in his chest, that melody of affection and deep love. Killua wonders if his feelings are showing through his face, he can feel his eyes get half lidded as he stares into Gon's eyes. The other male returns his stare, those amber eyes full of a strong emotion as well. Killua can't look away.

The ex-assassin has always been one to pay attention to his surroundings. He's been trained to do this since he could remember. It's important. Yet right now all he can focus on is Gon and his eyes. The noise fades away in till it's just them. It's like they're the only people in this theater.

Killua wants to make him happy. He loves him so much it's embarrassing really. He wonders if Gon knew just how deep these feelings go if he would still want to be with him. Because once Killua gets his hands on Gon and makes him his...Killua's not sure if he could ever go back to just being Gon's friend. Killua would accept it if Gon didn't want to be with him anymore but...Killua could never move on.

"You two should kiss." A voice coos behind them. Killua's eyes snap over to look, getting out of his love induced trance. There's no one behind them.

"I wonder who said that?" Gon tilts his head, looking back too.

"I don't know, probably some loser who doesn't have a life." Killua swears he hears someone mumble 'ouch' but again he doesn't know where it's coming from. Killua stands up, about to search the seats behind them only for Gon to grab his hand.

"Don't worry about it Killua." Gon looks up at him with those big eyes. "I think the movie is about to start."

Killua slowly sits back down, shooting a glare up at the people all the way in the back. There's not that many people in this theater. He was thinking it was going to be more crowded than this. Killua relaxes when Gon moves his body so he's right next to him, laying his head on his shoulder. Killua wraps his arm around Gon's waist, pulling him closer. His heart picks up speed but he keeps himself calm as he turns his attention to the big screen in front of them. The movie indeed is starting.

Killua tries to pay attention but it's hard when he has Gon laying on him and his hand is on Gon's waist. He feels so warm...ah and Gon's scent... Killua flushes. He wants to slap himself. What's with me? This is suppose to be a romantic date but all I can think about is...dirty things. And Gon has been making most of the first moves. It's just with the information that Gon loves him and his fantasized about him makes this hard. Killua has been fantasizing about Gon for years. He's wanted him in every way. Killua just wants to claim him, to share all their firsts together but he'll keep himself under control.

Whenever-if ever- they get together, Killua will not push for anything. He'll let Gon make all the first moves just so he knows he's okay with it. He doesn't want to push Gon or make him feel like he has to have sex with him just because they're dating. Gon thinks sex is very special...and it is. Killua wants it to be special too. He'll keep himself under control...He can do it. He's been doing it for years.

Gon tenses next to him, gasping when a jump scare comes. Killua automatically grips him closer, rubbing soothing circles into his waist. Gon snuggles into him, grabbing onto his arm. This is it. This feels right. Killua relaxes. This feels like something a couple would do.

Just when Killua is starting to watch the movie, sharing popcorn with Gon, he feels the seat next to him shift. Killua's eye twitches but he makes no movement. He didn't sense this person coming. Not because he was distracted. He was listening to his surrounds. Zetsu?

Killua slowly glances next to him, trying to appear as if he's just moving his eye. He blinks. There's a man sitting next to him. He looks familiar but Killua can't put his finger on it. His hair is long and brown, his face is blank except for this crooked smile. Handsome. Annoyingly handsome. He looks like he would be Gon's type. Killua tightens his grip on Gon, not wanting the other male to notice this guy. At the same time his stomach has this sick feeling. I know this guy...

That's when Killua's ears perk up when he hears a barely audible whimper. He glances over only for his face to drop and his eyes to narrow. Down the isle there's a couple sitting, the girl's face is flushed and it's obvious the boy's hand is down her pants. What has gotten Killua to get angry is that Gon is looking over at them, seeming to watch the couple with curiosity.

"Don't look." Killua puts a hand over his eyes, turning Gon's head back into his chest. Killua feels that protective and possessive spark. He doesn't want Gon getting hard from watching someone else...especially a girl. Girls have always been a threat to Killua when it comes to Gon. Even though Killua knows Gon likes him now, how deep is that like? Could it easily change if Gon sees someone else he likes?

Killua is insecure. He knows but he can't help it. Like he said, Gon makes him nervous in all the ways possible.

"I didn't know people did that stuff in a theater." Gon looks at Killua with curiosity.

"You're not suppose to but they do." Killua glares over at the two. No shame. " You guys are in the front row for crying out loud." Killua growls over at the two. The guy flips him off, getting Killua's eye to twitch. Before Killua can say something smart the couple leaves the theater. Probably going off to fuck somewhere.

"That was mean. You ruined their fun." The man beside Killua coos getting his eye to twitch. He knows that voice.

"Hisoka?" Gon looks up from Killau's chest, his eyes widening and lighting up in realization. "When did you get here?"

Of course. Fucking Hisoka. Killua didn't recognize him because he's not wearing his make up and his hair is down. Killua remembers the first time he saw him like that in greed island. He couldn't help to remember thinking how annoyed he was with how handsome he is and with how...big he is. Also he had wanted to rip it off after he was getting excited by looking at Gon.

"I got here just a little while ago-"

"Fuck off." Killua growls, not in the mood to deal with this man. This is suppose to be him and Gon's time. Hisoka only means trouble. Especially since this man has a thing for Gon. "There's no reason for you to be here or for you to look like that."

"How rude. I'm here to enjoy the movie. And look like what?" Hisoka blinks looking down at himself innocently.

"You don't have any make up on." Gon comments.

"Oh that. I thought I'd try something new~" Hisoka coos, those yellow eyes looking Gon over.

"How do you keep finding us? Are you stalking us or something?" Killua's eyes narrow.

"I'm just enjoying myself. You two happen to be where ever I am."

"Bullshit!"

"Oh Gon I didn't appreciate how you just left me in the amusement park. We were suppose to have fun together." Hisoka pouts. " I thought we had an agreement?"

Gon tenses in his hold, his eyebrows furrowing. Killua tightens his grip on the other male, glaring darkly at Hisoka. That protective flare sparking his aura. He grabs Hisoka's shirt, pulling him close to snarl in his face.

"You black mailed him by using his hurt wrist as a way to control him." Killua says this slowly, his blue eyes getting dull and threatening. "And you had something to do with it didn't you? Did you hurt him? Did you do that to his wrist?" Killua tightens his grip on Hisoka's shirt, those yellow eyes gleam.

"I didn't do a thing. Gon did it to himself. You should of saw it. It was quite a show."

"Hisoka." Gon moves out of Killua's grip, those amber eyes getting darker, his fists gripped.

Gon's fighting spirit eggs Killua on. "I don't believe you. I don't' believe Gon did that to himself. And when this went on, you so happened to be there."

"Killua we're interrupting the movie." Gon frowns when he notices that everyone is looking down at them. "Let's just go Killua-"

"But this guy is hiding something Gon." Kilua glances back at his friend before he glares at Hisoka. "Let's step outside."

"Sure. My pleasure." Hisoka smirks as Killua lets go of his shirt. The three of them stand up and walk out of the theater, Killua watching Hisoka closely. "I know you don't trust me but I'm telling the truth. I had nothing to do with Gon's wound. I'm innocent. I just happened to be there to witness it." Hisoka puts a hand over his chest, this smile on his lips.

"You're hiding something. I can tell." Killua's eyes narrow. He knows it. This guy is a lot like him in some ways.

"Killua, I really think I did it to myself though..." Gon mumbles, looking down.

"He just wants you to believe that Gon." Killua gives him a glance before turning his glare on Hisoka.

"Now, now. I wouldn't do that. If I had hurt Gon I would want him to know it was me. I would want to see his flare as I hurt him." Hisoka's eyes roll back, a strange smile on his lips. He blinks. "But it wasn't me." Hisoka smirks at Gon. "Gon's mind must be infected or something-"

Gon flinches.

"Do you have something to do with the fox stealer? Every time you have been there, the fox stealer has shown up in the form of me." Killua growls, his hand turning into a claw. He's not feeling like playing around anymore. Gon is sinking into himself.

"Hmm? I have nothing to do with that either-"

"The fox stealer seemed to be just a follower. There's someone pulling the strings. Are you that person?" Killua presses, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

"My hands are innocent." Hisoka holds his hands in the air. But he's smirking. "But I may know a thing or two about this fox stealer. And this other Killua you speak of.-"

"What do you know?" Gon frowns deeply, taking a step forward. "What do you mean?"

"I have information that you will be interested in. Information that can save you. Information that can make everything clear." Hisoka smirks, seeing Gon's eyes light in realization. Killua frowns, confused. His stomach sinking when Hisoka said something about information that can save you...while looking at Gon.

"Is the fox stealer planning on attacking Gon soon?" Killua takes a step forward, his heart drumming in his chest. "Speak!"

"My information comes with a price." Hisoka pokes out his hip, crossing his arms over his chest. Why does he keep looking at Gon? Killua looks back at Gon only for his face to fall. Gon is staring at Hisoka with wide eyes, his mouth slightly open, his face pale.

"We don't need you." Gon swallows, taking a step closer, glaring at Hisoka. "We've seen who the fox stealer is. When we see him next we'll find out where Clover is. We don't need your information. Leave Hisoka!" Gon's voice raises at the end. Killua's eyes widen at the tone.

"Do you have enough time for that Gon?" Hisoka coos.

"What are you talking about?" Killua looks back at Hisoka. He spoke in an ominous tone. Why wouldn't Gon have enough time?

"Oh you don't know? Gon is in a predicament. He is cur-" Hisoka starts.

In a blink of an eye Gon is right in front of Hisoka. He punches him in the face. Killua's eyes widen as Hisoka hits the wall from the force of it, the strange man moaning, looking at Gon with this hungry look in his eyes. Gon is breathing heavily, his face red and his eyes dark. "Shut your mouth." Gon growls lowly. Killua shivers, never hearing that tone from Gon before. He watches with wide eyes as Gon's aura spreads. It's strong, filled with a silent rage.

"Ohhh that look Gon! That look! You're taking me there just from that look! Magnificent! You're gorgeous." Hisoka moans, an obvious tent in his pants as he stares at Gon with awe and hunger. "Such anger!-"

"Keep quiet. Don't. Don't say any more." Gon's eyes fall. He takes a step back. "Leave."

"It's going to happen soon Gon. You'll be hit again." Hisoka looks up at Gon. "you need me." Gon's anger flares again only for it to dull down, like a fire getting too big and then burning out. Gon turns and starts to walk away.

"Gon." Killua watches him, swallowing hard. He doesn't know what to do. He's confused. Something is missing. He doesn't know something. "Gon wait!" Killua glances down at Hisoka who is licking at his busted lip, smirking to himself. He growls before he runs to catch up to Gon.

"i'm sorry Killua. We'll have to watch a movie another time." Gon says, his voice distant as he keeps moving.

"Nah that's fine." Killua walks quickly to keep up with him, to walk by his side. He watches his expression, frowning. "Gon...What was that about? What was Hisoka talking about? He was giving us information, why did you shut him up-"

"He just wants to make me upset. I can't be upset. I can't..." Gon takes a deep breath, closing his eyes. He stops walking. He grabs at his wrist that's bandaged and squeezes. "Everything is fine. I have enough time."

"Enough time for what? Is there something I don't know? I'm really confused here Gon." Killua grabs the other male by the shoulders, trying to look into his eyes that keep shifting from him. "...You're worrying me." Killua swallows. "Are you hiding something?"

Killua's whole being falls, his breath getting caught in his throat when Gon finally looks at him. There's tears streaming down his cheeks, those amber eyes glossy. "We were having so much fun. I ruined it. I just wanted...then he came. I don't' want Killua to be mad at me." Gon looks close to hyperventilating, his breathing heavily, his eyes distant.

Killua grabs Gon and pulls him in, hugging him tightly. He closes his eyes. He doesn't know what's going on. He's almost positive Gon is hiding something from him but...if it's effecting him this much, there has to be a reason he hasn't told him. Killua won't push it. Gon didn't push him back there when he almost confessed his feelings. "You haven't ruined anything. I still have a lot planned. We can do something else. Hisoka is the one who ruined it. I'm not mad at you." Killua reassures, feeling Gon wrap his arms around him.

"Killua cares about me." Gon says this, his body relaxing in Killua's hold. "You're my best friend. You would never hurt me. You would never want me to hurt myself." Gon completely relaxes, calming down. His breathing becoming even.

"Never. I care about you more than anyone else." Killua finds himself saying, feeling as if Gon needs to hear it. There's this dread growing inside of him. He has to swallow it down. He tightens his grip on Gon, his protective side kicking in.

"Don't worry. It's okay." Gon pulls away, his eyes dry and such a smile on his face that makes Killua's heart flutter. "I'm okay now." Gon pulls away, grabbing Killua's hand. "Let's have some fun." Gon starts to pull Killua along, his mood doing a 360. Killua watches him with a blank expression, his eyebrows furrowing. He wants to ask. He wants to get more information out of Hisoka but...he doesn't want Gon to get that look in his eyes again.

Killua will press it later. After today. He'll push this to the back of his mind for right now. He wants Gon to be happy...Something is bothering him. Killua will be his distraction. And when Gon is ready to tell him, he'll try to look for a solution.

Killua glances back at where Hisoka was only to see the man is gone.

---

"I'll pay you back for that movie. We didn't even get to watch half of it." Gon sighs as they walk out of the movie theater. He's been quiet till now. His hand firmly in his.

"You don't have to. It's not a big deal." Killua shrugs his shoulders. Killua has an itch to press for answers from Gon but he suppresses it. Tomorrow.

"But I want to." Gon thinks for a moment before smiling over at Killua. All those dark emotions he saw in the theater are gone and there's nothing but light. "Maybe I could make it up to you by taking you out to a movie." Gon brightens up at the idea.

"Knock yourself out." Killua tries to look indifferent but he knows he's blushing. Does Gon know this is a date? And if he does, does it mean he's planning on taking him out for a date as well? "That sounds good."

"Yeah." Gon beams. "So what do you want to do now?"

Killua can't help to frown. He had thought the movie would take a bit longer so by the time it was over they would be hungry. To be honest Killua didn't plan anything else out. He was just lying to Gon to make him feel better. He'll need to come up with something on the spot.

"I don't know, what do you want to do?" Smooth Zoldyck. really? Is that the best I can do? Killua's palms are sweaty and he can feel his breathing is picking up speed. This dating stuff is hard. Especially when a creepy Hisoka has to butt in. "The next thing I had planned was to go to a restaurant, I don't know if you're hungry though-"

"Sounds great! I was just about to say I was hungry." Gon chuckles, pulling Killua along. "And I get to drive there!"

An image of Gon's watery eyes flash through his mind. He couldn't' help to feel in those moments in the theater that Gon was unstable. He just did start acting normal again. And Gon's been spacing out a lot... "How about you drive us home? I know where the restaurant is anyway. You'll just get us lost." Killua says causally.

"Hmm I guess that's fine. I just want to drive it once." Gon's smile falters only for it to come right back. "Seeing you do it, it looks so easy! Then I can tell Mito I drove a car!"

"She would flip out you know that right?" Killua chuckles thinking about it. He can see the look on her face now. 'what? But you don't have your license! You could have been hurt and blah, blah'. All that jazz. But that's just her. Killua knows she cares for Gon deeply.

"I know but I still want to tell her." Gon smiles sheepishly as they let go of each other's hands to get into the car. Gon looks over at Killua. "Do you think we should get our licenses to drive soon?"

"Eh that's such a drag though. We don't really use cars to travel anyway." Killua shakes his head. "First you have to take classes and then you have to pass this stupid test. It's just a hassle."

"Yeah. I didn't really want to get one because I was thinking like you but...a lot of adults have their license right?" Gon picks at his jeans before looking at Killua curiously, those amber eyes ready to learn.

"Yeah but most people aren't hunters like us. Leorio has his license but Kurapika doesn't. You don't need a license to make you into an adult." Killua waves that thought off as he puts the keys into the ignition and turns the motor on.

"Oh okay." Gon nods his head, smiling to himself. "Good. Because that would have been a hassle. I'd rather spend all the time I have trying to find Ging." Gon's smile falls slightly. Killua can't help to grip the wheel. Sometimes he wishes he could tell Gon what he thinks of his old man but he couldn't. Not when It's been Gon's dream since he was 12. younger than that even. Gon has done nothing but search his father out, and Ging has done nothing but put him in danger, not seeming to even care that his son might die.

"It's been a long time." Gon mumbles looking down at his hands. "I'm sixteen almost seventeen. I started searching for Ging when I was 12...I've been looking for 4 years. We've done a lot in those four years though. And for the most part we were getting somewhere. But then the trail just ended at greed island. It went cold." Gon looks up. "I wonder where we should look next after the vacation ends. Do you have any ideas Killua?" Gon looks over at Killua with those big eyes.

"Not really." He answers honestly, keeping his eyes forward as he drives out of the parking lot and onto the road. He frowns, wishing he could be more help, when he sees Gon's shoulders slump.

"Yeah I don't know either. But we'll think of something." Gon brightens back up, staring forward, that fire coming back. "I will find Ging. No matter how long it takes."

"Yeah. You will." Killua smiles, Gon's expressions contagious. Killua believes Gon could do anything.

"That being said I am kind of concerned about something." Gon taps a finger to his chin, thinking.

"What?" Killua raises his eyebrow, trying to keep himself from looking at his friend and keeping his eyes on the road.

"Do you mind Killua?" Gon looks over at Killua, his eyebrows furrowing.

"What do you mean?" Killua has to look over at Gon.

"Do you mind us doing this? I mean you've been searching with me for 4 years straight. You've always been by my side to help me and to fight with me. I never once asked you what you thought about it. I knew that you would have my back. It's been so long and..." Gon looks deep into Killua's eyes. "I've been wondering if there's something that you want to do? That I could help you accomplish? We could take a break from finding Ging to do it."

"I'm fine Gon. There's nothing that I want. I have everything I need right here." Killua flushes when the last part spilled out. He looks back at the road, taking a deep breath. "You don't need to ask what I think about it. I'm your best friend. I know this has been your dream. I've been by your side for four years and I'll continue to be by your side. We're going to meet Ging." Killua smiles over at Gon only to stop when he sees how Gon is looking at him. There's this deep emotion there, his eyes getting bigger and brighter.

"You're the best Killua! You're the most selfless person I know." Gon smiles gently. "Always helping me and doing things with me even when it's trouble. Putting up with me too when i'm slow on things."

"I'm not selfless." Killua chuckles shaking his head. He's got it all wrong again. "I'm very selfish."

"What do you mean?" Gon tilts his head.

"I wouldn't be doing these things if I didn't lo- like you." Killua coughs, swerving the car for the third time today. His heart going arrhythmic for a second there. "I'm not like you. I don't' do things for just any body."

" I still think your selfless." Gon looks at him with admiration, not saying anything about the second slip up he's done today. Gon reaches over and starts to play with Killua's hair, running his fingers through it before he scratches behind Killua's ear. The ex-assassin almost purrs from the attention and the feeling, and the compliments. "I really can't thank you enough for all you've done." Gon smiles to himself as he continues to scratch Killua's scalp. "I couldn't' have done it without you."

"You don't have to thank me idiot." Killua swallows down his emotions yet he can feel the butterflies in his stomach and his heart pounding in his chest. His lips can't stop smiling. He feels all warm inside. Complete. Killua wants to say he's embarrassing him but he can't. He's too happy with what's going on right now. They sit in a comfortable silence, Killua driving while Gon plays with his hair, the raven haired male staring at him.

Killua takes a deep breath. Now it's time for him to mentally prepare himself for the dinner. The dinner is the most romantic part. He had to put a lot of thought into it. He even paid extra for violins to be played...which will be really embarrassing. He doesn't know why but just picturing eating with Gon with violins playing gets him to blush. Gon has always been a fan of classical music. They don't get to listen to music often but Killua remembered this one time when they were staying the night in this hotel in yorknew, Gon had turned on the radio and this song with just violins came on. He sat down with this small smile on his face, closing his eyes. He looked like he really enjoyed it.

"Ohh this place looks fancy." Gon's eyes get big when Killua pulls up to the place, parking his car. Killua nods. This place looks like a glass house. It shines brightly with flowers leading the way to the entrance. Killua looks over at Gon, his eyes brightening up when he sees how Gon is looking at the place. Gon likes it. More points for Zoldyck.

They get out of the car, Killua swallowing his nervousness as he reaches over, grabbing Gon's hand first. He interlaces their fingers, loving how their hands just fit together. Killua hopes his hand isn't that sweaty as he walks with Gon, leading him towards the entrance. A man opens the door for them and they walk in.

"Wow!" Gon's eyes get big as he takes in the the fountain that is inside this place, the water sparkling as it's shot out of a fake crane's mouth.

Killua smiles, taking in his friend's reactions, feeling better about this. He takes his eyes off of Gon to look at the host who is staring at them with his eyebrow raised.

"Can I help you?"

"Yeah I have a reservation for two. It's under Freecs." Killua had used Gon's last name instead of his own just in cause his last name would have caused problems. Some people get a little nervous when they hear the Zoldyck name.

"Ah here it is." The host looks down at his podium. His smile gets more friendly. "Right this way sirs, your table is waiting." He starts to walk away.

"I've never been in such a fancy restaurant!" Gon keeps looking around as Killua tugs him along as they follow the host. "This is really cool Killua!" Gon smiles over at Killua, the ex-assassin flushing from being caught staring.

"Y-Yeah." Killua stutters, his heart picking up speed again. He takes a deep breath to calm down before he makes a fool out of himself. Killua has been aware since he's walked in here with Gon, holding his hand, that they are getting some stares. As Killua takes in all the people here it seems they're the only gay couple. Killua feels like flipping them off but he doesn't feel like getting kicked out of his place after they just got here.

"Please sit here. Your waiter will be here for you momentarily." The host does a slight bow before he leaves.

Killua sits on the right chair. Gon sits in front of him. Those amber eyes stare at him, they look so bright, a knowing smile on his lips. Killua looks away, feeling too hot right now. What's with that look Gon is giving him?...does he know now that this is a date? Killua feels his hands starting to shake so he shoves them in his pockets.

"Killuaaa." Gon says his name cutely, leaning over the table, his smile getting bigger. "I have something for you." Gon starts to unbutton his shirt. Killua's eyes widen, wait what- "Here!" Gon pulls out a rose from his shirt. It's a little squished from being in his shirt but it's pretty all the same. Killua's eyes light up when he takes in the color. It's a blue rose. "Ta da! I found one!" Gon holds it out to Killua, the ex-assassin takes it from him, bringing it to his nose to smell, trying to hide his blush.

His heart is skipping around and he feels like squealing. Why he is such a girl? "W-Wow Gon thanks. I didn't even think these existed..." Killua hates how his voice stutters.

"Oh." The waiter walks up to them and sees the two teenage boys smiling, their faces red, Killua holding the rose. He glances at the two. He looks horrified. Like he just walked in on them fucking or something. His mouth is open, and he's trembling.

"Sir are you okay?" Gon stops smiling at Killua to take in the waiter with a frown. "you don't look so good."

"G-Gay." This older man points a finger at Gon. Killua growls about to reach over and snap his finger only for Gon to chuckle.

"Yup! I am." Gon doesn't seem offended at all. "But that's beside the point. You really look sick sir." Gon looks at him in concern. This man makes another groan before he runs off. Gon blinks.

"What the hell? That guy was an ass hole." Killua growls, feeling his aura spark.

"What do you mean?" Gon tilts his head. "He just looked sick to me."

Killua snares. Yes. We were making him sick. Killua wishes he could silt his throat. People like that don't need to live.

"I'm s-sorry sirs. I forgot who was assigned to be your waiter." The host comes out looking frantic. "He has a disease. He has a great fear of gay people. It's just in his head. He doesn't mean any harm." the host stops talking for a moment.

"Oh wow I didn't know there was fear like that." Gon's eyes widen. "I didn't mean to scare him-"

"That guy is a fucking dick. I thought this place was suppose to be the nicest place on earth? That's what your ad said. Wait till I tell the world about this. You'll be labeled as the homophobic restaurant, you'll have all the activist on your ass." Killua smirks. "Unless you want to make it up to us?"

"...Y-Yes of course." The host stutters. "The manager is well aware of...your waiter's actions now. I was going to tell you that to strengthen our apology your meal here Is free. We are really sorry for his inconvenience. We'll have another waiter come right away." The host bows before running off quickly.

"Ha. We get to eat for free because of that ass hole." Killua smirks, feeling pleased.

" The host said he was just scared of us because we're-" Gon stops. He looks down. "I'm gay-"

"No you were right. We're gay." Killua looks down at the rose in his hand, not able to make eye contact with Gon.

Instead of questioning it, Gon smiles, those eyes getting bright. "So you don't really like a girl?"

He must be relieved. "No. I don't. I made that part up." Killua's mouth is starting to get dry and he knows he's sweating. This is stressful. He wishes he could just calm down and be smooth.

"That makes me happy." Gon smiles, closing his eyes in it.

"Why?" Killua glances up, feeling so red. He can hear his heart in his ears.

Gon's cheeks tint. He starts to play with his utensils. "Because of reasons." He ends up saying.

"And these reasons are?" Killua can't help to smirk, feeling more confident that now Gon is the one blushing and fiddling.

"Reasons." Gon puffs out his cheeks. So cute. "That's a sound explanation."

"Mmhmm." Killua's smile turns light as he holds his head up with his hand, staring at Gon, knowing his eyes have gotten half lidded. They're slowly picking each other a part. Gon knows he's gay now. And Killua knows Gon loves him. And he knows this is a date, Killua is sure of it. Then it's only a matter of time before one of them slips up or gives in...

Gon blushes more. Killua can't help to feel hot. When Gon blushes like that Killua just wants to attack him. There he goes, being sexual again. Thank god for these tight pants. It becomes painful to have a boner in them which is like punishment for him.

A woman comes up to them and smiles brightly. Killua keeps his eyes on Gon. "Hi i'm Shelly and i'm going to be your waitress. What would you like to start off to drink?"

"I'll have a coke." Gon smiles at the woman.

"Same."

"Do you guys know what you want?"

"Oh I haven't even looked at the menu!" Gon slaps his face before he grabs the menu to look at it-

"We'll both be having the special." Killua looks at this woman. He smiles at Gon when he looks at him with a questioning look. "You'll like it. Trust me."

"Okay." Gon smiles. Gon trusts him. He always has.

"Excellent choice." The woman chuckles. "I'll have your drinks out and your bread right away." She leaves.

"...So it's not a girl but...do you really love someone Killua?" Gon mumbles this, his cheeks getting pink again.

"..I do." Killua swallows, feeling nervous again now that Gon is questioning him.

"And you're gay too?" Gon locks eyes with Killua. The ex-assassin feels a ting of panic only to calm himself. It's okay to admit it now. Gon is okay with it. Gon is gay. Gon loves him.

"Yeah...I am." Killua nods his head, his blush reaching his ears.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Gon tilts his head.

"Reasons." Killua mumbles.

"Killua." Gon's eyebrows furrow.

"Hey you said so yourself. Reasons is a valid explanation." Killua teases.

"When did you find out you were gay?" Gon presses.

"Awhile ago." Killua looks down at his plate. "I just didn't know how you would take it."

"I would have been fine with it. You'd probably have to explain it to me." Gon flushes. Probably thinking about how he just learned about what gay means and everything.

"I know that now but I didn't know back then. I guess I was a little nervous." Killua shrugs.

"Why didn't you say anything after I told you I was gay?"

"I was still nervous for some reason." Killua flushes, rubbing the back of his head. It's hard being honest.

"...Thanks for telling me." Gon smiles brightly, those amber eyes getting half lidded. "I feel closer to you now. We're both gay. It's another thing we share together." Gon grins.

"Yeah." Killua can't help to chuckle at his friend. It's light though, his heart skipping around.

The woman drops off their drinks and tells them their food will be out. Killua is glad he has something to sip on while they talk about these things. It makes him feel calmer. The sugar that's familiar is calming.

"Hey, Hey Killua." Gon's cheeks get pink but there's this light in his eyes, a fire of passion. "Do you know what I like about you?"

"...No." Killua tries to bury his face in a menu. His heart is beating so loud he wonders if Gon can hear it. That look in his eyes is going to drive him mad.

"I like your hair and your eyes. I like how pale your skin is and how smooth you are to the touch. I like how when you do something bad or funny your lips turn in this smile like a cat and your canines pop out. I've always thought that was cute. Oh and I like how you sleep at night, you curl up and when you sleep with me you seem so relaxed. I like when you sing in the shower, and I like your voice. It's deep and silky. I like how you get red in the face so easily and I like the way a blush looks on you. I like when you get that small smile on his lips and I like the way you laugh. I like how strong you are and I like how you teach me new things. I like how cunning you are and how funny you are-" Gon says all these things while looking at Killua. The ex-assassin knows he's dropped his menu, his eyes wide and vulnerable, showing his emotions. He feels like his heart could just explode.

"I could go on and on." Gon flushes, but his smile is so sweet. "I like everything about you."

"A-Ah Gon..." Killua's lips tremble. He wishes he could express himself like Gon. But that's all he can manage. Killua has a whole list of things he likes about Gon too but he doesn't think he could verbally list it without dying of embarrassment. Why is this so hard? How can he be a good partner if he can't even say anything to all the nice things Gon jut said about him? He bites his lip.

Gon just smiles at him sweetly, those eyes so bright. God. This boy loves him. This boy wants him. This is Killua's dream come true yet he can't even express a little bit of these deep feelings for Gon that he's been hiding away for years.

"Relationships are pointless. You never know if the girl your with is working with someone to kill you or if she will be used against you. Love is pointless. You don't need anyone. Who would even love you little brother? You're covered in blood." He can hear illumi's voice, those dreaded words he drilled into his head over and over again coming back. "When it's time for you to have a lover, we'll pick on out for you-"

Killua bites the inside of his cheek till he tastes blood. No. That's not him anymore. Illumi was wrong. Gon loves him. Gon loves him despite of all his sins. Gon chose him and Killua chose Gon. They love each other. Gon is the only lover he wants. Killua has to express himself. He has to try. He's come too far. He needs to push past his barriers that have been set up since he was so young.

Things are different now.

Just as Killua sets his resolve a bunch of people come over with their food. Gon's eyes sparkle and his mouth waters as plates and plates of food are set up in front of them. It's all seafood. Lobster, fish, crabs, you name it. Killua isn't' interested in eating right now. He takes in Gon's happy expression, those amber eyes that he's adored for so long are so bright. He grips his fists, digging his nails into his flesh. He won't run away from this. He won't back down.

The violins start to play. Gon's eyes light up and he smiles brightly. "Wow! Music with our meal. This is amazing." Gon chuckles.

"Gon." Killua's voice comes out strained. Barely a whisper. Killua forces himself to be louder. "Gon." This time it comes out firm.

"Yes?" Gon turns his attention back on Killua, those amber eyes looking at him curiously. He's so...gorgeous. His everything. His life. His reason for life. The reason he is happy. The reason he isn't off somewhere with that dead look on his face as he's told what he should do and who he should kill. Gon is his light. His angel.

"T-There's something I've b-been meaning to...to tell y-you." Killua wants to punch himself in the face right now. He's stuttering all over the place. He knows his pupils have constricted and he's sweating. He takes a deep breath, trying to keep eye contact with Gon who has leaned closer, all his attention on Killua.

"What is it Killua?"

"I lo- I lo-" Killua sighs in frustration, his face getting so red. "I r-really...y-your my every..." Killua wants to scream. He can't get the fucking words out. "I-I lov...I really...Gon...I..." Killua feels like crying.

"Stop." Gon's voice gets Killua to shut his mouth. His heart hammers in his chest, he can feel sweat fall down his face. Shitshitshitshit. Gon is probably fucking embarrassed by how stupid I look. Shit I couldn't even- "You don't have to try so hard Killua." Gon grabs Killua's chin, forcing him to look at him. Gon is blushing deeply, those eyes are so bright, they're dancing. "I have something I've been meaning to tell you too Killua..." Gon leans in, those lips so close to his own. Gon looks him in the eye, those amber eyes filled with passion and light and...acceptance. "I love you too Killua."

Killua's head explodes. He becomes overloaded with all his emotions. Gon got what he was trying to say and Gon just admitted his feelings for him. Gon is looking at him with those beautiful amber eyes. Gon knows Killua loves him. Gon knows, he knows...and he loves him back.

Killua's brain short circuits. It's been in danger of doing this all day with all the stress this date has put him through. The poor Zoldyck couldn't have imagined what Gon saying he loves him sober would have done.

Killau's head hits the table, everything muffled around him. His lips frozen in this sappy smile of his. Killua is out for the count, Gon making the finishing blow.

---

"Eh?! Killua!" Gon's eyes widen when his lover just ups and passes out. Gon's heart is beating so fast and his cheeks red from what just happened. Gon can't believe it went down like this. When Gon woke up this morning and he had decided that he would lose to Killua...he could never expected losing like this.

Killua was trying to confess to him first. It was so cute how red he was getting as he stumbled over his words and fiddled with his fingers. Yet Gon knew what he was trying to say. He could see it in his eyes all of today. The love he has. His emotions. Killua couldn't hide them as he was trying to confess them. Gon would have let him keep going if not for the fact that Gon could tell Killua was getting upset with himself. His eyes were starting to get watery and there was this anger, this frustration starting to build. He was trying so hard. Gon decided to meet him half way.

He was planning on losing anyway but with what just happened...it seemed like a draw. That's how he takes it anyway. Killua has been so nice and adorable today. The raven haired male had no idea this was a date when he first woke up but once he took in how nervous Killua was acting and these looks in his eyes and how he was trying to touch him more and how he was paying for everything it just started to add up. Gon new for sure it was a date when he saw the fancy restaurant and when Killua ordered his food for him. That's something Gon would have done on a date. Gon put it together. Killua's strange behavior, how flustered he got, that yearning in his eyes...it all made sense.

After realizing this is a date, Gon felt both happy and disappointed. He thought he was going to surprise Killua with a date first but the ex-assassin beat him to it. This is a really nice date too. Killua put a lot of thought into it. Gon was holding himself back from just jumping across the table and hugging Killua to death. In all honesty, Gon was about to confess to Killua before he did. He was just about to open his mouth when Killua said he had something he wanted to tell him.

Today has been wonderful- there's a piece of it left forgotten in the back of his mind- almost like a dream.

Though of all the reactions Gon pictured in his head when he told Killua his feelings...passing out was not one of them.

"Hey Killua?" Gon pokes the top of his head, luckily Killua's face didn't land in the plate of seafood. Gon's stuck. He's still shocked it all went down so fast. Gon gets up to sit next to Killua. He shakes him gently. "Killua? Are you okay?"

"mm" Killua mumbles something under his breath. Gon notices that the music has stopped. He looks over to see the violinists staring at them with wide eyes. They have a couple of stares from the other people eating here. When Killua comes to he's going to be really embarrassed.

Gon decides to take matters into his own hands. Killua has been very romantic today. It's time for Gon to show him his charms.

Gon smiles over at the waiter who has just come to check up on them. "Hey mister if you help me with something I'll pay you for it." Gon leans up to whisper in his ear. The waiter nods before he smiles.

"You can count on us."

"Good!" Gon beams as he gently picks up Killua who is dead weight, holding him against his chest like a baby. Killua would be really embarrassed if he knew Gon carried him out of the restaurant like a bride while he was passed out so Gon won't tell him.

Killua's going to have a little surprise when he comes to.

---

Killua awakes to the sound of waves crashing and a cool breeze on his cheek. He opens his eyes slowly, the night sky is all he sees, the stars twinkling above him. Where?...

"Oh you're awake!" A cheerful voice says to his right. Killua's eyes widen and he gets up quickly, his heart going arrhythmic. It all comes back with just Gon's voice. They were on a date and they were eating diner and then Killua tried to confess but he just couldn't and then Gon he...

"I love you too."

Killua swallows, dreading what he knows happened after Gon said those words. Killua was just so happy he blew a fuse or something.

"You okay? You've been passed out for an hour." Gon frowns, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Killua finally takes a deep breath and looks over at Gon. His face gets red when he sees how Gon is looking at him. Concern, affection. As plain as the sun.

"I-It's been that long? Damn sorry." Killua closes his eyes in frustration. His face getting so red and his breathing picking up speed.

"It's okay. Don't feel bad. I was just surprised is all." Gon chuckles. "You looked really happy before you passed out. I understand. I'm really happy too. I feel like I could just explode." Gon wraps his arms around Killua, the ex-assassin's eyes widening in his hold. "We love each other. And you're all mine. I'm glad I can finally be honest with you Killua." Gon nuzzles his head against Killua's before pulling away. The ex-assassin finds himself staring. It feels surreal. Like a dream. Can something like this really be happening to him of all people?

"You know I'm angry Killua." Gon pouts, crossing his arms. "I wanted to be the first one to take you out on a date but you beat me too it!" Gon winks. "I couldn't let you show me up. SO I hope you like diner on the beach! And i'll be taking you out on a date myself soon!"

Killua just stares, his mouth dropping at his words. His heart is beating so fast and his head feels fuzzy again. Another date? Gon taking me out? He wanted to take me out first? Killua slowly looks down, his heart skipping a beat when he sees that the food they had ordered is laid out before them. They're both siting on a table cloth, the waves crashing in front of them and the stars above their heads. There's a candle in the middle on fire. Killua's mouth goes dry.

I pass out when Gon admits his feelings to me and if doesn't get upset with me. He carried me to the beach and fixed it up like this. He waited an hour just for me to wake up...Killua swallows down his feelings before looking up at Gon. His chest tightens when he sees how Gon is staring at him, those amber eyes deep, a soft smile on his expression as he just takes him in. Gon said I'm his...I'm his...Gon's...mine...

"S-So what does this mean now? Are we..." Killua swallows, feeling lame. He's so nervous even after everything. He just can't get over this feeling that this isn't real. It's his cruel mind playing tricks on him. "Together?...like romantically? I mean we don't have to be if you don't want I just-" Killua starts to panic, his thoughts all jumbled together-

"Of course we're together Killua! I want you to be all mine. So I guess this makes you my boyfriend now." Gon beams, reaching over to grab Killua's chin, making the ex-assassin look at him. Those amber eyes dance and are so bright. "It's strange saying it though. Boyfriend." Gon giggles. " Maybe I should ask you properly. Killua will you be my boyfriend?"

Killua doesn't know if he can breath anymore. He nods his head, words not being able to be formed. Gon's smiles gets even brighter. "Yay! Killua's mine." Gon hugs him tightly. I've always been yours. Killua wishes he could speak but he can't. He feels all fuzzy inside. Killua is Gon's. Killua is Gon's boyfriend...Gon is his boyfriend...boyfriend, together-mine.

Killua finds himself wrapping his arms around Gon tightly, squeezing him, burying his face in his shoulder, feeling his eyes get watery. He holds Gon possessively, close against his chest. His heart beating so fast.

"Is this real?" Killua breathes out. He couldn't help it.

"What do you mean?' Gon tilts his head. Killua can picture him having his eyebrows furrowed. "Of course it's real Killua."

"It's just...I've wanted this for so long. I'm having trouble believing it now." Killua mumbles, his self doubting ways coming back into play.

"Killua why didn't you tell me if you wanted this for so long?" Gon pulls away, looking at Killua with a frown on his face.

"I was..." Scared. Killua's eyes shift away. "I didn't think you would understand."

"Maybe not at first but you could have explained it to me. I think I've loved you longer than I realized Killua. Even when I was younger when I would think about you my chest would get warm. When I grew older, that warmth turned into a fire. I would get hot thinking about you and I just wanted to be closer to you." Gon's cheeks tint.

"I didn't think you would want me." Killua's cheeks turn red. He can't look at Gon.

"Why wouldn't I want you? You're everything to me Killua." Killua's heart stops beating for a second. "You shouldn't hide things from me." Gon looks down at his hands before he shakes his head. "I can be honest with you now that you know but...Kurapika told me of your feelings for me."

Killua's head snaps up, his eyes becoming on fire. "What-"

"Don't be too angry...He told me after I found out I loved you. After I realized these feelings I had were of love and not a sickness. Once I realized I loved you...I was happy but sad. I thought you liked girls. It was when you said you were going to pick up a chick to bang at the pool." Gon's shoulders slump. Killua's anger dulling down to a frown when he remembers that. "I wasn't going to tell you because I wanted you to be happy. If you wanted a girl who was I to stop you? But that's when Kurapika told me that you were hiding feelings from me. I was really happy but at the same time I couldn't help but wonder why you wouldn't have told me sooner." Gon twiddles his fingers.

"If you knew I loved you before I told you...why didn't you say anything?" Killua feels embarrassed. All this time Gon knew? Kurapika told him? He still feels like kicking that guy's ass.

"Because I wanted you to confess to me." Gon gives him a sheepish smile. "I might have made it into a...game."

"A game?' Killua raises his eyebrow.

"Yeah. I wanted to see if I could make you confess to me before I lost my patience and gave in and confessed to you. A game of endurance you see-"

"You made this into a competition?!" Killua shouts, hitting Gon over the head.

"Ow! I thought It would be fun but it turned out a lot harder than I expected. The whole time I wanted to kiss you and to hug you and to tell you I loved you." Gon mumbles, his eyes lowering like a child who's done something wrong.

Killua glares at him for a moment before it softens up. "That's so like you. Making everything into a competition." Killua sighs. He ends up smirking, despite everything. "I have a confession to make too. I knew that you loved me before you confessed as well. Leorio told me.-"

"Leorio told you?!" Gon's eyes widen. He frowns.

"Yup. And once I think about it I may have been in on this 'competition'. Because I also wanted you to confess to me first." Not because of the competition because Killua was still afraid. "So it looks like we're even."

"I guess Leorio telling you was fair." Gon pouts. He smiles soon after. "It's funny how the game ended though. It ended in a draw."

"A draw?" Killua raises his eyebrow.

"Yeah! You stared confessing and I finished it. I think we met each other half way." Gon smiles brightly. Killua can't be angry with him when he smiles like that. Gon's' reaction was so...him. Killua can't be upset when he is really loved by this man.

"You're such an idiot." Killua mumbles but it's lighthearted. He kisses Gon quickly on the forehead. "But you're my idiot." Killua says this so quietly he hopes Gon didn't hear him, his face getting blood red. His lips tingled from just saying my. Gon is mine. Mine. Gon is...

"Yup!" Gon chuckles, not at all offended as he leans over, wrapping his arms around Killua's waist. "I'm all yours. Forever."

"How can you say that? We just got together." Don't say that. I'll hold on to it. You'll make me want it. I'll want to have you forever. We'll never be able to go back.

"Because I know. There's no one I want to be with. I only want to be with Killua. And I know i'll never want anyone else. I just feel it. You're the only one for me." Gon says this so easily. Killua feels a lump in his throat. Gon just said his own feelings with his mouth. Gon just said the words Killua's been dying to hear for so long. He won't cry. Not yet. He wants to be closer to Gon. He wants to express himself in another way. If he can't use his words...he'll use his actions.

"Gon." Killua's voice's comes out more steady than he expected. It's low and filled with emotion. Gon looks up at him, those amber eyes are half lidded. Killua's heart aches with want. He doesn't deserve this man but Gon is all his. Gon wants him and only him. Killua wants to give him everything.

Killua emotions take a hold of him and he leans in too quickly, wanting to finally get a taste of Gon's lips only for Gon to lean in at the same time, just as eager. They're foreheads collide, both boys saying 'ouch' as they pull back.

The two teenage boys are breathing hard, one rubbing at his head while the other is trying to calm himself down. I came in too quickly and roughly. Don't be too overbearing. Killua takes a deep breath. You can do this. Gon was trying to kiss you at the same time...Kiss him. Do what you've been wanting to do for years. It's okay... Killua slowly leans in, cupping Gon's cheeks, his heart beating slowly in his chest as he gets closer and closer to Gon. Just when their lips are about to touch, he feels Gon's aura spark, an uneasiness to it, and he feels Gon tense in his hold.

Killua immediately lets go of him and backs off. He feels like he just got shot in the chest. I was going too fast I shouldn't have tried I-

"No! No I'm sorry. Come back." Gon grabs Killua's face and gets closer to him, his eyes wide. "I didn't mean...I just got nervous..." Gon takes a deep breath before he looks into Killua's eyes that are still a little panicked. "Killua..." Gon says his name like honey, rubbing his thumb gently against his cheek, those amber eyes staring into his. Killua finds himself relaxing by his touch and his kind words. He goes lax at his touch, leaning into his warmth. Killua wants to try to kiss him again but he holds back. "Can I kiss you?"

Killua nods his head, forcing his body not to shut down as Gon's eyes become half lidded. He leans in close, Killua can't close his eyes. He's stuck there, watching Gon like some kind of creep but he can't help it. He feels so warm and fuzzy inside. This is the moment he's dreamed about since he was 14. He dreamed that maybe they would kiss in bed or maybe when they were sharing food, or maybe if Gon fell and then they happen to kiss. He's had many scenarios in his head. Fantasies of this moment.

He never imagine it could be this perfect or make him feel this way.

Gon leans closer and closer, He stops when his lips are almost brushing against Killua's, his breath can be felt on his lips, a bit heaver now. Then Gon closes the distance, those soft lips pressing against his own. Killua feels like he's just been shocked. His heart does a flip, his eyes widening for a moment before they become almost closed. They're just sitting here with their lips pressed together but it's the most amazing thing Killua has ever experienced.

Gon opens his mouth and starts to experimentally suck at his lower lip. Killua's lips move without him telling them to. His arms slowly wrap around Gon's waist, his whole body melting into this boy, giving in to him. They kiss slowly, awkwardly at first. Both trying to get their bearings. This is their first kiss after all. Gon seems to be getting the hang of it pretty fast though. The awkward kissing becomes a little bit faster, their kisses getting deeper. There's a want behind it. A need. Killua holds himself back from just pinning Gon to the ground. He keeps himself in check, trying to control his sexual urges. The kiss that started out innocent is starting to change. Killua's eyes widen when Gon's tongue brushes against his closed lips.

He opens up his mouth, letting Gon's tongue invade. Once it's in it touches Killua's tongue then pulls away as if unsure. Soon enough Gon starts to experimentally rub his tongue against Killua's, caressing it. Killua moans, his face getting even redder if that was possible. Gon is good...At first it was a little painful with Gon pressing too hard and he would make their teeth clang but Gon's starting to get better and better. Killua is learning as well.

When Killua pushes his tongue into Gon's mouth, fighting for dominance and winning, he finds Gon really likes when their tongues dance together. Gon's breathing is getting heavier and he's tightening his grip on Killua. Drool drips down their chins, both of the boys paying no mind to it.

Killua's nerves slowly fading away. Especially when Gon groans as Killua makes the kiss deeper, his hands gripping into Gon's thick black hair. "mm Killua..." Gon breaks the kiss when they both need air. His cheeks are a delicious shade of pink. Those amber eyes are deep and cloudy. "That was amazing. You can kiss really Good Killua. You were making me feel really good. Did it feel good for you too Killua?"

"Yeah..." Killua flushes at Gon being so up front about it. He licks his lips. His pants are tight once again.

"That was my first kiss. I had it with you Killua. That makes me really happy." Gon's eyes get so bright. "Now that we're together, i'm going to kiss you all the time I want." Gon smiles sweetly, leaning in to kiss him once again. It's short but deep. Killua feels himself leaning after Gon when he pulls away. Killua flushes when Gon giggles.

"Don't laugh at me." Killua glares, his blue eyes half lidded with lust as he pinches Gon's thigh. "I might not let you kiss me again." He smirks, even though he knows it's a weak threat. Killua will always give in to Gon.

"You wouldn't do that." Gon pouts. "You like it just as much as me. Look how red you are Killua. And you were making sounds-"

"Okay, okay." Killua flushes, getting to flustered with Gon being so up front.

"Hey Killua?" Gon crawls into Killua's lap, the ex-assassin letting him, powerless to stop him now. Not that he wants to. Gon is his. Gon is his boyfriend. Killua belongs to him. He smiles. "Lets eat all this food real quick before it gets too cold. And then lets kiss some more okay?"

"Sounds good to me." Killua flushes as he warps his arms around Gon, hugging him to his chest. He kisses the back of Gon's neck. Loving how the younger male squirms in his hold as he bites and licks at the sensitive skin.

"A-Ah Killua." Gon arches into him when he sucks there hard, wanting to see Gon's reaction. Killua feels his member twitch. Hm? Did I just find a weak spot? Killua notes this as he pulls away, smiling innocently at Gon who is pouting at him.

"What?" He chuckles at how red Gon's face is.

"I'll get you back for that." Gon mumbles as he wiggles in his lap. Killua's face falls and he bites his lip.

"Fine i'll stop if you stop with your wiggling." Killua takes a deep breath when Gon stops. Really, Gon is trying his restraint right now. His emotions are still off the wall.

"Deal!" Gon beams as he puts food on his lap and starts to eat some shrimp. Killua smiles, thinking how cute Gon is before he lets go of him to pull a plate closer to him. He starts to pick at some crabs with Gon still in his lap, the waves crashing before them and the stars above their heads.

They sit in comfortable silence. Killua still feels warm and fuzzy and hot from what just happened. He still can't believe that Gon is actually his. He can't believe that he just shared his first kiss with can't believe this his happening but...Killua is happy. He's so happy. He'll never let Gon go. He'll do all he can to make him happy with their relationship. Killua will take it slow. He'll never rush Gon. They have all the time in the world...after all.

Gon is the only one for Killua.

"I wonder what Leorio and Kurapika are going to say when we tell them?" Gon breaks the silence, looking towards the waves with those amber eyes so bright and sparkling.

"I don't know. I'm still kind of pissed that those two were all up in my business." Killua huffs. "But I suppose I should be thankful." Killua leans his head against' Gon's back. They're the reason we're like this right now...

"Yeah without them I might still be thinking my love for you is some sort of weird sickness." Gon rubs the back of his head, seeming embarrassed.

"Mister I've gone on so many dates didn't even know what love feels like." Killua teases but it's happy. This tells him that Gon has never loved anyone else. It's only been him.

"Shut up." Gon pouts. "I was just confused. I just learned that guys could like each other romantically. I have to thank Kurapika for that. He taught me a lot about gay people. I found out that he was gay and because of it I started to discover myself."

"Yeah, yeah I still want to kick his ass though." Killua puffs out his cheeks. "Leorio also told me he was acting like he likes you just to piss me off. Were you in on that?"

"They told me about it." Gon quickly eats some more shrimp when Killua looks irritated. "but I didn't tell him to do it. Kurapika wanted to help you confess."

"It helped me almost kiss his ass." Killua shakes his head. "I didn't like it." Killua mumbles into Gon's back.

"I know."

There's silence again as the two boys eat, the new couple staring out at the ocean, a breeze caressing them.

"Killua there's something else I have to tell you...I'm sure you've realized that the guy I've been talking about is you." Gon takes a deep breath. "So that means...I thought about you before we were together. I hope that doesn't make you angry."

"Not at all." Killua flushes with how fast he said it. "I mean...I've done it too." Killua mumbles.

"I'm glad that's off my chest...and you're not disgusted?" Gon looks up at Killua, those amber orbs looking at him.

"I'd never be disgusted with you." Killua swallows. Wanting to express himself. "I think it's hot-" Killua coughs. Okay. Maybe a little bit too strong there-

"Really?! I think it's hot you thought about me Killua!" Gon looks too happy right now as he smiles brightly. "Did you touch yourself too?"

"G-Gon lets just eat okay?" Killua quickly shoves some meat into his mouth.

"Did it feel good Killua? What were you thinking about? Did you finish?-" Gon starts to ask question after question. Killua quickly covers his mouth, feeling like he's about to die. When Gon keeps talking into his hand, Killua replaces it with his lips. Kissing Gon and swallowing his words. The younger male tenses only to melt into his hold. Killua's kiss that was flustered and little angry soon turns into something sweet and gentle. Their lips seem to melt together better then they did the first time they kissed. Gon's tongue feels like velvet against his own. The two boys kiss slowly, still experimenting, learning.

Killua can't help to feel that with Gon in his lap, his lips on his own, the stars above them like they were on that night long ago...that they've made a new promise to be together. A stronger more, intimate one. Gon is his and Killua is Gon's. Whatever lies in the future for them doesn't matter. He knows whatever time has for them, Killua will be there, right by Gon's side.

Killua is the happiest man on earth and he's never letting Gon go.

Never.