PIPER POV

You let out a loud groan as you slam the silver device on the countertop hard.

Who the fuck does your mother think she is?

You phone to ask her a simple question and she tells you that she thinks it would be best if you went to rehab because it sounds like you've been drinking again.

So maybe you've been drinking more than you usually do. But you can't help it that your life is shit right now.

You finish mixing yourself a drink and grab the bottle of pills from your purse, pulling 3 of them out and swallowing them down with the liquid.

Much better.

"What are ya doing?"

Sam walks up behind you and peers over your shoulder.

"Nothing," you smile tightly, dropping the bottle back into your purse.

Sam is quick to reach down and take the bottle in her hands, scanning the label. "Percocets Piper, really?" she questions, raising an eyebrow at you. "What is going on with you?"

"I've just had a lot of shit to deal with okay? Between Polly and Larry getting engaged, my mom being up my ass all the time, and seeing my ex-girlfriend again, it's been rough."

"You saw Alex?"

"She was at the café with Nicky the other day. And I went to the bar that she works at last night."

"So taking pain killers and drinking every single day is a good way of dealing with this shit that's going on in your life?" She gives you a pointed look.

"Of course not," you shake your head quickly. "But, I don't know how else to deal with it, okay?"

"Hey, it's okay," Sam whispers, gently rubbing your arm. "Maybe you just need to distract yourself from everything. Why don't we go out and do something fun together tonight?"

"Okay," you attempt to smile. "How about we go to Jamieson's? It's a little bar down the street from the café."

"Sure," Sam shoots you a soft smile. "But first, give me the pills," she holds her hand out expectantly.

You sigh before hesitantly handing the bottle over to your roommate.

"Thank you Piper," she whispers as she dumps the contents from the bottle down the sink. You watch as the pills swirl down the drain. "It's going to be okay," she reassures you as she embraces you in a hug. For the first time in a long time, you feel comforted and not so alone.

PIPER POV

"This place is a dive Piper," Sam groans as you pull the door open and step inside the small bar. "What are we doing here?"

"It's really not that bad. Give it a try," you shrug as you shuffle inside. The place is almost empty, just as it had been a few days ago, save for the few creepy old men occupying the slot machines.

Sam follows you inside as you both settle onto a barstool. A bushy haired woman is sitting a few stools over.

"Chapman is that you?" a familiar husky voice calls and you smile when you turn to see that the other woman is Nicky Nichols, which must mean that Alex is working. Perfect.

"Hey Nichols," you offer a smile and a small nod. "How goes it?"

"Great," Nichols smirks as she takes a long sip of her drink. "This night is about to get interesting ."

"Hey Nicky, I'm sorry, I think we're out of…"

Alex appears from the cooler behind the bar and stops mid-sentence when she spots you sitting on the stool. "Jesus Piper, what the fuck are you doing here?"

"Having a drink and catching up with an old friend," you nod your head towards Nichols. "I'll take a margarita please."

"Who's that?" Alex jerks her thumb towards Sam, who you almost forget is sitting beside you.

"That's Piper's roommate," Nichols chimes in enthusiastically. "Remember the one I told you about? That I fucked that one time…" she smirks as she shoots Sam a flirtatious wink.

"Hmm," Alex hums, eyeing Sam skeptically before taking her drink order and turning around to prepare the beverages.

"Piper what is going on? I'm confused…" Sam leans over and whispers quietly.

"Bathroom now," you hiss quietly at Sam, excusing yourself from Nicky and Alex.

"Okay Piper, what the hell was that? Who is that woman?"

You take a deep breath and let it out slowly. "That was Alex."

"Alex?" Sam's eyes widen as she stares at you for a moment. "The ex-girlfriend?"

"Yes," you manage to whisper back.

"What are we doing here?" Sam asks as she eyes you suspiciously. "Oh my god Piper! You intentionally brought me here because you wanted to see her."

"I'm sorry Sam but I just… this whole moving on thing is way harder than I thought it would be," you admit quietly. "I was hoping that she would see me with you and get jealous maybe. It sounds stupid but I just…"

"Hey, it's not stupid," Sam smiles at you as she lifts your chin with a finger and forces you to look at her. "You and Alex have a history together and clearly you're still trying to figure your feelings out."

You follow Sam back to the bar and slide into your seat across from Nichols, who is giving you a weird look.

"What?" You snap, turning to look at the bushy haired blonde.

"Nothing," she laughs a little, taking her beer bottle, and bringing it to her lips. "Isn't it just ironic that you end up at Alex's bar of all places?"

You roll your eyes at Nicky and take a sip of your margarita. "It's not my fault, she makes a good margarita."

"Uh-huh... If that's your story," Nicky smirks, casting you a skeptical glance. "So Chapman, we never really got to talk the other day. How's life since Litchfield?"

Terrible.

"Great," you force the fakest of smiles as you catch Alex peer up from making a drink and cast you a glance. "I've had such wonderful support."

"Oh yeah?" It's Alex that raises an eyebrow this time. "You mean Carol and Bill?" she lets out a laugh.

"Actually," you hiss at her with venom staining your words. "They have been great. And I have Sam, who has been amazing at taking me under her wing and all of my friends from work."

You aren't sure why you find the need to lie to Alex. But, you don't want her to think that you have become this helpless wreck.

"How about you Alex?" You turn to the stunning bartender, your eyes focused on her emerald orbs. "Life become everything you hoped it would be?"

"Eh… it's been better," Alex admits slowly as she wipes the bar down. "Just trying to figure everything out, I guess."

"Been finding lots of women to keep your bed warm?" you ask almost bitterly as you take a sip of your drink, your gaze not leaving Alex's.

"That's really none of your business Piper," Alex grits her teeth angrily. You can practically feel her cracking right in front of you.

"I'll take that as a no."

"Girlfriends are overrated," Alex finally answers with the slightest of smiles. "Beside the best ones always fuck you over."

This feels vaguely reminiscent to you. Of that time when you'd both arrived at Litchfield and she made a similar comment to you.

"Yeah, you would fucking know, wouldn't you?" you growl back with a venomous hiss, slamming your drink down on the counter hard and pushing it forward for a re-fill.

"I seriously do not understand the two of you," Nichols finally pipes up from her spot beside you. "One minute you are so in love it's fucking sick and you are practically ripping each other's clothes off in the shower. And the next, you are hissing at each other and acting like you both hate one another, which we all know is bullshit."

"Fuck you Nichols." You and Alex both reply at the same time.

"When will you both just admit your feelings for each other, fall into bed, and move on from this whole act?"

"Seriously Nichols, shut the fuck up. You're crossing the line," Alex growls icily at the bushy-haired woman beside you.

"Maybe we should go Piper. This was a bad idea," Sam finally speaks quietly, reaching out and giving your hand a re-assuring squeeze.

"Yeah Piper," Alex retorts as she pushes her glasses further up on her nose. "You should go home with your girlfriend."

"She's not my girlfriend," you inform Alex firmly. "Why are you jealous?" you lean over the counter of the bar, completely aware that you are giving Alex a clear view of your ample cleavage. And you do not miss the way her eyes momentarily travel down towards your slightly exposed skin.

"Jealous?" Alex actually laughs at you. "That is just like you to assume that I'm jealous."

"You and I need to have a talk," you look between Alex and Nicky. "In private."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Come on Al," you sigh tiredly, running a hand over your temple. "We need to talk about this; just once. If you decide you hate me or don't want me in your life anymore, I promise I'll stop coming around here."

You reach into your purse and find a pen, scribbling your phone number on a receipt. "Call me when you decide about having a chat over coffee. I promise I'll disappear afterwards if that's what you want. But I think we both owe this to one another."

You set the piece of paper on the bar, settle your bill, and send Alex a final smile before following Sam out of the bar, satisfied that you had left that bar with what you'd wanted; a jealous Alex and a way into her life again.

PIPER POV

"I am so sorry," Sam whispers as she looks at you with empathetic eyes. "Seeing you and Alex together tonight, I realize how hard it must be for you. You two seemed to have this connection that is so rare."

"It's okay," you offer Sam a weak smile as you reach into the fridge and pour two glasses of wine, offering one to Sam.

"I can't imagine what it must be like to be going through all of this," Sam tells you as she slips onto the couch beside you. "I mean, I've been through a nasty break-up or two in my day but with you and Alex it seems like there is just so much history there."

"We have been through a lot together," You nod your head as you relish the taste of the wine, which is adding to the buzz that is already filtrating through your body. "It's very complicated for anyone to understand. I mean hell I don't even understand it sometimes."

"It's amazing really. How you have been able to get through all of this."

"Well I haven't exactly been alone," you admit as you set your wine glass down on the table and turn to look at Sam. "You have been such a great friend to me. And I can't thank you enough for that."

Sam looks into your eyes intensely and suddenly her demeanour changes. She scoots closer to you. "You see I've been doing some thinking," she gulps down nervously, reaching out and taking your hand in hers, gently rubbing circles along your palm. "Maybe we could be more than friends. I really like you Piper."

You don't know what to say. Sam is attractive, you will admit that. And she has been amazing to you these past few weeks. At first, you struggled to connect with her, because you didn't want to let her close to you. But ever since you started opening up to her, you definitely felt that you could trust her. Yet, you still don't feel any sort of spark when she touches you or looks at you. It certainly isn't like it was with Alex.

"Why?" you finally settle on as you train your eyes on her smouldering ones. "Why do you like me?"

"Your strength is amazing Piper," she admits as she brushes a strand of hair from your eyes. "At first I thought you were this really stuck-up, narcissistic person but as I've gotten to know you and see how vulnerable you are, it's made me realize just how beautiful you are. And how much I want to help you; help you get over Alex."

You aren't sure how to respond. You still maintain that Alex is the only person that can make you whole again. But Alex has made it clear that she doesn't want to be a part of your life anymore. You are just so conflicted right now.

"I'm sorry. I can't," you finally crack out slowly. "I'm just not ready to move into another relationship yet. I hope you understand."

Sam takes you by surprise at this moment. She leans in and gently brushes her lips across yours. The kiss is nice but you certainly don't feel that electricity shooting through your veins, that passion inhabiting your body.

She gently pulls away and stares into your eyes. "We don't have to be in a relationship. Those are overrated anyways. We could just be roommates with benefits."

She doesn't let you respond and presses her lips against yours again, more fervently this time. Still no spark. Yet, you find yourself deepening the kiss and combing your hands through her hair.

"Bedroom now," she whispers in between heated kiss.

She could be your pain killer. She could help you forget about Alex, right?

ALEX POV

Two weeks have passed since you've seen Piper. It seems to be a rare occurrence since she started popping up in your life randomly.

You look at the piece of paper hesitantly as you start to press the numbers into your phone and save the contact.

As much as you don't want to face this; you know that it would be better for both of you. You need some sort of closure before you can move on from this and allow yourself to feel normal again.

Hey Piper. It's Alex. I'm free on Friday afternoon. Was just wondering if that invitation for a coffee date still stands?

You don't expect a reply from the blonde so fast.

You asking me out on a date Vause?

You roll your eyes at Piper's typical response as you find a small smile creeping across your face. You board the train and type a response back.

Not the most egotistical thing I've heard you say but I would say that's a pretty big assumption.

Would you mind coming to my apartment for coffee? I'm expecting a package that day and better be here to receive it.

You find yourself gulping a deep breath down. You aren't too sure how you feel about going to Piper's house.

That'll be fine. Just send me the address on Friday morning.

You and Piper continue to exchange little texts throughout the week. It feels normal again.

You'll never admit it but you sort of find yourself excited for Friday afternoon. And the thought of being in Piper's apartment seems to consume your mind all week too.

You find yourself shaking nervously as you stand in front of the door to apartment 2A. Piper had just buzzed you in and now you would get to confront your blonde ex-lover alone.

Piper answers the door and shoots you a warm smile as she leads you in. As she takes your coat, you can't help but steal a glance and notice just how good she looks. She's wearing tight jeans and a shirt that leaves little to the imagination. Piper seems to notice the way your eyes are focused on her. "Like what you see?" she kinks an eyebrow as she places your jacket on a chair and motions towards the table.

"Don't be so narcissistic," you scoff as you take a seat across from Piper at the table. She slides a pristine white mug of coffee in front of you. You take a sip and offer her a smile. "Much better than the prison coffee huh?"

She smiles genuinely and for the first time since you've seen her in the last six months, you catch a glimpse of the Piper that you fell in love with.

"So what did you want to talk about?" you ask nervously as you absentmindedly swirl the black liquid around in the mug.

"I lied to you the other day when I said that life was great," she admits, looking down at her mug, as if she is embarrassed. "Truth is, aside from Sam, I don't really have anyone."

"You're lonely?"

"Maybe," she shrugs, her eyes suddenly lifting from the floor. "I miss you Alex. I learned how to survive without you somehow. But, it fucking hurts. In prison, we had each other to get through all of the bad shit. And now being back in the outside world and losing the biggest support I had, I feel like I'm fucking drowning."

"Piper…"

"I know I fucked up any chance that I had with you," she cuts you off, a hint of regret swirling in her voice. "What I did. It was fucked up. I know that. And I am so sorry Alex. What will it take for you to forgive me? I'll do anything for you to make some peace with this."

A small tear slips from the corner of her eye and you desperately want to reach out and wipe it. This is the Piper that you miss. The vulnerable, raw, and real Piper. Not that power-hungry, egotistical woman.

"I forgave you a long time ago," you admit slowly, staring into her eyes as intensely as you can. "I was afraid of letting you in because I didn't want to get hurt again. We always hurt each other Piper. It's inevitable."

"It's amazing how after all this time, we can still have a conversation with such ease. It's like no time has passed. I've never felt more connected to someone."

"Piper…"

"I don't know how else to say it. But, I'm miserable without you Alex. I need you in my life," she responds quietly, and she gives you that look with those damn bambi eyes. "I've accepted that things may never be the same between us because of how badly I fucked up. But, truth be told, I'd rather have you in my life as a friend than not have you in my life at all."

"Piper," you shake your head as you feel yourself falling into her trap again. "You know we've never been able to be just friends."

"We've never really tried," she counters back as she takes a long sip of coffee. "Don't we owe it to ourselves to try?"

She does have a point. You've never really tried to be friends before. You look into her blue eyes and notice how broken they are, echoing the similar look that rests in your emerald orbs. Your eyes shift downwards and catch a glimpse of the word pain etched into the underside of her arm. You know that she is falling apart slowly at the seams, whether she'll admit it or not.

Maybe you are both broken. Maybe you need each other to fix the cracks and scars on your hearts.

"Alright," you surrender slowly, throwing her a soft smile. "So where does this leave us?"

"Well what do friends normally do?" she cracks you a smile and tilts her cup towards her lips.

"I don't know? Hang out?"

"Basically like we used to," a smile spreads across her face. "Without the sex and cuddling, of course."

"Piper." You give her a hard look.

"Sorry too soon?" she questions with a chuckle.

"Maybe we could start by hanging out with Nicky," you suggest with a shrug. "I mean, she's a friend to both of us. She'll probably make inappropriate comments about us but I think we can handle that."

Piper nods and lifts her cup towards yours. "Here's to being friends," she grins as the two mugs clink together.

ALEX POV

You can't help but smile when you find yourself stopping in front of the apartment. You happen to be in the neighborhood and hadn't seen Piper in a few days. As your eyes look up, you find yourself feeling nostalgic and wondering what the blonde is doing right now. Being friends with Piper was easier than you'd initially thought it would be. You knew it would be hard. But, there are those rare moments where she gives you a glimpse of the real Piper, and it reminds you of the way that things used to be.

You find yourself walking up the stairs, armed with Chinese food, hoping that Piper will be home and the two of you can hang out.

You let out a heavy breath as you slowly bring your knuckles forward and rap them on the door.

A few moments go by and you almost feel defeated until you hear the sound of feet shuffling and the door unlocking from the other side.

Piper stands on the other side, hair a tangled mess, looking completely out of sorts.

"Alex. Hey," she rasps out, surprise gathering in her voice. "What are you doing here?"

You hold up the bag of Chinese food. "I was in the neighborhood, just got off work actually, and was hoping you'd be around to join me for dinner. But, you look busy, so I'll come back another time."

"Wait a second," she purses her lips together and gives you a weak smile. "If you just give me a minute, we can…"

"Piper, have you seen my underwear? I can't seem the find them anywhere." A voice calls out from the other side of the door. You feel a stab in your heart as the pain ripples through your body.

Sam, Piper's roommate, clad in only a robe appears beside Piper. "We have company?" she questions as she walks up behind Piper and snakes an arm around her waist. "Alex. Hey." You can almost swear you see a hint of smugness in her eyes and an air of conceit in her tone. You shouldn't be jealous. You are just friends with Piper. But there is something unsettling that stirs in the pit of your stomach at the sight of them together as your heart wrenches with this throbbing pain.

"I'll come back another time Piper," you manage to get out when you finally find your voice. "See you later." You quickly turn around and find yourself rushing down the hallway.

"Alex."

You turn around at the sound of Piper's gentle tone. "I'm sorry."

You look deep into her eyes and you see a certain brokenness swirling in the depths of them. You nod and turn your back on her, the pain cutting through you like a knife.

Once, you hit the sidewalk, you bend over and gasp for a breath of fresh air, feeling like someone just kicked you in the stomach. You need to get out of there fast.

You hail a cab quickly but you don't find yourself heading back to your own apartment. You find yourself standing outside of the apartment that belongs to Nicky Nichols, still clutching your bag of Chinese take-out.

You march up the steps to Nichols apartment, quickly rapping your knuckles on the door, and shouting out, "I'm in a fucking predicament Nichols. You need to get rid of whomever, you've got in there!"

Nichols throws the door open and shakes her head at you. "There's nobody in here but me. Jesus Vause, what the fuck is your problem, coming up here and pounding on my door?"

You step inside the apartment and fight every urge you have not to let the tears fall. "She's sleeping with someone else."

"Whoa, slow down Vause," she takes your jacket and leads you towards the living room. "Who is sleeping with someone else?"

"Piper."

Nichols looks at you for a moment, and then shakes her head. "You're not exactly in the position to be upset with her Alex. You aren't her girlfriend."

"I know," you moan out loudly as you run a hand over your forehead and put your feet up. "I just, I didn't imagine she would move on so quickly and with her roommate of all fucking people."

Nichols turns to you surprised. "Chapman's sleeping with the hot brunette? Damn Vause, she was a good lay. You've certainly got some competition." She digs into the bag of take-out. "You brought me ginger beef?"

"Nichols, you are not helping," you roll your eyes at her as she passes you a plate and you fill it with food, although you really aren't all that hungry again.

"I'm telling you Vause, you need to move on," she tells you in between bites of Chow Mein noodles and ginger beef. "I mean, I fucking miss Lorna like hell sometimes too, but the only thing that keeps me sane is keeping my bed warm constantly. Sitting here and moping about it wouldn't do me any good. And it certainly won't do you any good either."

"I know," you finally respond, looking up from your plate of food. "I just don't know how to move on, okay? I've been trying and just when I think things will finally be okay again, she shows up in my life and just has to complicate it." You can't help but wipe away the tear that falls from the corner of your eye. You hate crying. Especially in front of Nichols.

"Jesus Vause are you fucking crying?" she sets her food down and turns to you. "Things are really that bad huh?"

"It feels like everything is crashing down right now Nichols. I don't know how to explain it. And you know me, I'm not really good about talking about stuff. I just fucking hate her."

Suddenly you feel Nichols put her arms around you. "It's okay Alex," she whispers as she rubs circles on your back soothingly. "Let it all out."

You pull back and smile at her through the tears that slowly start to subside. "God, I must look like a wreck." You smile weakly at Nicky. "Thank you for being there for me. You've been the one person that has literally stuck by my side with all of this shit. So thank you."

"What are best friends for?" Nichols smirks as she picks up the remote and starts flipping through the channels, insisting that the two of you are going to settle on a good movie and eat ice cream.

You smile as you look over at Nichols from the corner of your eye. She has been the most amazing support in your life and you never want to lose that. But, you just need to feel something, anything. It has been so long since you've felt anything. And Piper clearly has plans of her own.

"What?" Nichols turns to you when she catches you staring at her out of the corner of her eye. "What are you looking at, creep?"

You roll your eyes at her habitually. "Do you ever think about that time?" you ask quietly.

"What time?"

"You know, that time we comforted each other?"

"Oh yeah," she laughs as she continues flipping through the channels. "That was weird."

"I need to feel something," you whisper, taking the remote from her hand and letting it fall beside the couch. "Please?"

"Look Nichols, I lost the one person; hell the only person I could have ever imagined myself being with in the future because she stomped on my fucking heart. And now seeing that person move on and be happy with someone else that isn't you; that fucking sucks. It's just about comfort right? And I know you need comfort too because you understand what it's like to be in the same fucking position."

"Alex…"

"It wasn't awkward the last time we comforted each other. It's normal to want to feel comforted. It's not like there's any feelings involved. You know that just as well as I do."

You don't let Nichols respond; instead you lean over, and press your lips hard against hers. You try so hard to imagine that you are kissing Piper right now, and not Nicky.

You break away from Nichols and kink an eyebrow at her.

"Oh what the hell, it's just about comfort right?"

You nod as you look deeply into her eyes and notice the same brokenness that rests in yours. You didn't even realize it until now but Nicky Nichols is just as broken as you are. And she can be your pain killer for just one night, right?

Please don't hate me! I promise that this story has a specific direction I want to take it in and that this needed to happen in order for the plot to progress. Don't worry Sam won't be sticking around for very long. As for the Nicky/Alex angle, it does serve some importance in future chapters, and will certainly have its impact. There will also be some serious Vauseman coming up here very soon, and don't worry, we all know how good they are at staying just friends :) Also, I know I suck for taking so long to update but honestly I kind of struggled with this chapter and things have been crazy busy. Hopefully, if all goes smoothly, the next update will be much quicker.