Chapter Three:

Bitter Truth

I could hear their voices, but I didn't respond. It wasn't as if they were actually trying to prevent me from hearing. Too long have their whispers penetrated the night; taunting me and agitating me at first. Now there was a mere echo of feeling, shadows of a farce that never was.

I rose from my bed and pulled on simple light gown, something I've become accustomed to, as Abassador and Princess of my planet, and slipped out of a concealed door. From there I traveled down the corridor and into my deepest thoughts, wondering when everything began to fester and die.

These emotions that war with me and congeal within my chest haunt me even now, and it wasn't made any better by Rini's outburst. One could only wonder what the child was thinking, but the utopian society we live in is anything but ideal. In fighting for this world, we began to lose sight of the fight in us to maintain. Desires became greed, and greed bred sloppiness and scandal. If Serenity could see this now, the weakness of her daughter and the neglectful spite of her scouts, she would break. It is shameful, that she died to see fruition such as this.

I continue to walk, ignoring the whispers and pointed stares of the servants. It irked me how engrossed they were in the destruction of their lives, as well as the bond of the scouts. People truly were like rats, lacking in fur and tails, but vermin all the same. I gave up my life for this. I devoted my existence and sanity for this, and it sends me reeling in anger every time I think of it.

At the end of this corridor splits off in two directions, one leading to the throne room and the other leading to a secluded balcony overlooking the city of Crystal Tokyo. I turned towards the balcony, knocked over at the beautiful sight before me.

She sat there, bathed within the light of a single candle. Her long, dark hair flowed over the pure, smooth skin of her shoulders. The gaze her eyes held as she looked upon the land was tragic and desperate, yet beautiful and ethereal. Every night I come to gaze upon this beauty and every night I am rewarded with the elegant silhouette of her slim, feminine frame.

I wanted her. I wanted her with all of my being, and yet, I denied myself. Years of hating the existence forced upon me, I refused to partake of the moral chaos. I would not so lower myself to sneaking about at all hours of the night, hiding my passions and desires beneath the same cloak of deceit and lies. Not for this angel, whom deserved the pure light of the sun, and all my love would have to offer. As much as it pained me, I could never live by half-measures; and I could never ask that of her.

"Please…."

The sound was so faint, so light, I thought it to be a product of my disillusionment. Only then did I realize the object of my affection and longing now stared back at me. Those eyes like emeralds now shone upon me with a sadness and longing to match the demons in my heart.

"Please….."

I couldn't move, couldn't breathe as the angel walked towards me, reaching out to me in the darkness of the shadows, and the light of the very hopeful candle. It was a dream, a nightmare, an apparition, an angel, approaching me.

Her touch was more than I dared to dream, and everything I hoped to attain. Nothing like the rushing of waves, but the soft blow of a gentle wind within the forest. Her essence permeated my mind and consumed me; all in one touch.

"You stand there and stare at me for hours at a time, but you never approach me. You never say a word to me. And then, by the sun's rise, you forget me."

The hand moved from my cheek to caress my lips, slowly tracing them as if to memorize, as if to convey her longing to join them with hers.

"Amara….don't run away from me."

As much as I wanted to, as much as I wanted to take the Princess in my arms, I tenderly took her hand in mine and gently pushed it away. The pain in her face was unbearable, but it must be done.

"Never. Never would I taint the feelings I have for you by sneaking about like it's something shameful. You deserve more. You deserve better. You deserve all of me."

"So why can't I have all of you now?"

Her pleading threatened to break away at my resolve, but I powered through, wanting to get as far away from this angel, or risk taking her right then.

"Give me time. Until the tide has all but died."

I left her then, walking down that corridor to the fork in the halls, back to the room I shared with my lover. Crawling under the blankets cold and devoid of any heat, I swore I could hear the snuffing of the candle, blown by the gentle wind of the forest.

"She can hear you, you know! You may not want your marriage, but I love her and don't want to drag her into this!"

"I didn't come here to bitch about your girlfriend! I came here to let off some steam. Are you going to do your job, or do I have to go to someone else?"

"Why won't you leave me alone? I don't want to do this anymore. That first time was just weakness."

"And the second and third time? I don't need you Michelle, if you're going to act all high and mighty now, then there's nothing more we need to discuss."

"Darien!"

"I thought you didn't want to drag your girlfriend into this? Go back into the room Michelle, we're done here."

"What is your problem!"

"You! You're my problem. And my mistake."

I cringe as the door slams, hoping against hope that Amara would wake. It's a feeble and useless hope; who couldn't hear that?

Yes, Darien was only a moment of weakness, and those other times were just habit. After all the years of cheating and secret affairs between the royal couple, I wanted to fix things with Amara, to go through with our plans of merging kingdoms and start lives of our own. How did that involve comfort sex with my king and superior?

Opening the door to the bedroom, I could spy the blonde turned toward the opposite wall in the dark. Her uneven breathing told me she was having a fitful sleep. I close the door and head out into the hall; I felt filthy and didn't want to touch her. I barely step one foot out of the door before I see a figure dart away. It was a bit dark in the spot they stood, so I couldn't tell whom it was, but it unnerved me nonetheless. My heart told me it wasn't a servant.

There were whispers about and conversations in the dark, but when will there ever be quiet again? When will there even be peace and harmony we fought so long and hard to get?

Walking on and on I come to a large picture on the side of a nearly bare wall. It was a painting of exquisite colors depicting a couple. The woman wore a long, flowing gown with hair the color of the night in this light. The man was clad in pure white robes with long, lightly colored hair streaming down his back. The couple in the painting were reaching for each other, calling out with their eyes and souls, desperate to be together. It was heartbreaking to watch. Reaching to get to each other, the couple was hindered by the rolling waves of the turbulent sea.