Naruto (c) Masashi Kishimoto

The Art of War (c) Sun Tzu

Yuzuki stared at her reflection. It was an utter disaster. Her once long ebony locks where now hacked to a cropped boyish look. Her two friends, Kaori and Takara, giggled behind her, while her stoic bodyguard just snorted in annoyance. "It was too long anyways," Tsukiyo muttered.

"But I liked my long hair! It was down to my waist!" Yuzuki groaned, putting her face in her hands and sobbing in frustration.

"It's a good look for you," Kaori quipped, trying to make her feel better.

"How fast does hair grow?" Yuzuki asked, looking at the three other women in the room.

"Depends on the person," Takara shrugged. "We just need to trim up the ends," Takara tugged at the short ends which fell just an inch pass Yuzuki's chin.

"I look like a freak with a duck's ass!" Yuzuki gestured to the hair in the back that refused to stay down. "I'm ugly!"

"Such crude language for the peacock," Tsukiyo smirked.

"This is all your fault! You grabbed me by my hair!" Yuzuki shouted.

Tsukiyo snorted, "I'm a kunoichi. I use any means to win. If you were focus on your self-defense lessons oppose to your deep conditioning treatment. Maybe you wouldn't have lost your locks."

"Gah!" Yuzuki slapped Tsukiyo. "I want you removed from sight, you insolent servant!"

Tsukiyo rubbed her cheek and gave Yuzuki a nasty smirk, "Oh, did I hurt the peacock's feelings? Sorry but I can't leave. I'm under direct orders from your husband."

"My... oh gods!" Yuzuki paled, "What would Madara think!"

Hopefully that you are so hideous he'll come crawling back to me. Groveling at my feet, begging for me to forgive him! Takara thought. "I'm sure he'd think your cute." She cut stray end. "He's not that picky when it comes to appearance. Seriously that man goes through phases. One day he likes them with big butts, the next big tits, the other a tiny waist. He's a womanizer. I bet he's fucking a girl in the barn right now."

"Yeah..." Yuzuki felt her shoulders slump. "You're right. Why would a tanin like me even catch his attention," Yuzuki kicked herself for developing a crush on her powerful and aloof husband. She couldn't deny the fact that he was incredibly handsome.

"Hey," Kaori squeezed Yuzuki's shoulders. "Don't say that, I'm sure if we dress you up pretty you'll have his eye in no time. He may be an ice cube ninety-nine percent of the time, but Madara-sama isn't completely heartless."

"You think?" Yuzuki looked at Kaori, a hopeful plea in her eyes.

"Yes. I'm positive," Kaori hugged her. "Now let's make you pretty."

Madara drummed his fingers in annoyance as he waited with Izuna at the dinner table. "Where is she?" he growled.

"She was having her self-defense lesson with Tsukiyo today. I'm sure she's moaning how you are putting her through un-lady like things or how she broke a nail throwing a kunai," Izuna snickered. Madara looked at his brother with an arched eyebrow.

"What?" Izuna blinked, "You know how she gets when you even bring up the mention of work."

Madara sighed deeply, "I'll admit that she has gotten considerably better about not being an annoying brat."

"Really?" Izuna looked at his sibling. This was the first time Madara had even said anything positive about Yuzuki.

"It's been four months," Madara looked at him, "she's improved... slightly."

Izuna chuckled softly, knowing that getting an honest compliment from his brother was like pulling teeth. "Oh, here she comes now."

"Good, I'm starving," Madara sat up straighter.

"You aren't gonna die of starvation," Izuna smirked and patted Madara's stomach, "besides you are getting a bit flabby."

Madara swung a punch at his brother, but Izuna easily dodged it. "Hashirama is forty pounds heavier than me!" Madara smirked, "Who's the fat one now?"

"You are, he's six inches taller than you."

"Bastard!" Madara lunged at his brother, pinning him to the ground by his throat, his fist drawn back and ready to slam into Izuna's face. "Wipe that smirk off your face before I do it for you!" Madara snarled.

"Ahem," Yuzuki cleared her throat as she walked to her seat besides Madara, utterly use to Madara and Izuna's playful banter by now. She waited as the house-hold kunoichi served their meal. "Itadakimasu," she muttered clapping her hands.

"Hn, itadakimasu," Madara muttered which was repeated by Izuna. Yuzuki prayed that dinner would pass in utter silence, with no-one drawing attention to her hair, but alas the gods were against her.

"Yuzuki... what happened to your hair?" Izuna asked, have studying her for a long moment. Madara glanced at her briefly, did a double take before outright staring at her. He swallowed what was in his mouth.

"Your hair!" he pointed at her, bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing but failed and was soon on his back slapping the ground, his deep belly laugh echoing in the dining room. "It looks like a duck's ass!" he laughed, covering his face with his hand.

Yuzuki felt her cheeks flush with humiliation and she shot a dirty look at Izuna. "Thanks a lot!" she spat before getting up and running off to her and Madara's shared bedroom. Madara began to pant as he regain his breath before sitting up again.

"Oh gods, that was rich," he snickered.

"I kinda liked her hair long," Izuna mused. Madara's merry smile morphed into a deep frown.

"Back off," his Sharingan spun in his eyes, "she's mine."

"Right, right," Izuna nodded, "don't want you getting your panties in a twist now. Even though I remember you hated her just a few weeks ago. Surely changed your tune."

"Grrr," Madara shoved a piece of teriyaki pork into his mouth and chewed vigorously. "Shit," he mumbled upon biting his tongue. Izuna laughed.

Yuzuki looked up from the book she was reading. It was Madara's favorite. "Uh... hi," she said tentatively, trying to break the uneasy silence. Madara looked at her as he tugged his shirt over his head, snickering softly. "Stop laughing at me!" she snapped.

"What?" Madara wadded up his shirt and tossed it into a corner without looking. "Gonna cry because I fine your duck-butt do funny?" He smirked cruelly at her. Yuzuki sniffed, bit her lip and put her nose back into the book. She refused to give him the satisfaction of her tears. Again, she questioned herself if trying to earn this man's affection was really worth all the crap she had to endure from him.

Madara joined her with a sword an whetstone and began to sharpen the blade. The rasp of the whetstone was oddly soothing to her and Yuzuki soon put down The Art of War and curled up into a fetal position to sleep. It took only five minutes for Madara to have her arms around her. "Night," he breathed mockingly into her ear. Yuzuki elbowed him in the gut. He grunted and tightened his grip. "Remember what happened last time you tried to beat me up, hmm?" he reminded her with an amused tone of a bully that has his victim right where he wanted them.

Yuzuki gasped, rolled over and was about to slap him but he caught her wrist and stole a quick kiss before pushing her away from him and rolling onto his side so his back was facing her. "Thank you for the good night kiss, love!"

Yuzuki shrieked in outrage and smacked him with her pillow repeated, which only caused the shinobi warlord to laugh. Yuzuki pouted when she grew tired of beating him with her pillow. Huffing in defeat, the noblewoman went to sleep.

Madara waited until his fiery little wife's breathing evened out. Smirking, when she was fast asleep, the Uchiha rolled over and studied her. He gently took some of her hair between his finger and was going to bring it to her lips when the dark tresses slipped out of his fingers. In annoyance he tried again and after another try, gave a silent anguish cry. He couldn't believe Yuzuki had cut all her beautiful hair. He liked her hair too! It was so soft and silky and it smelled nice, like jasmine. He loved burying his nose in it, as he drifted off to sleep or running it along his upper lip. It was so nice to run his fingers through and now... now...

His wife's beautiful hair was gone!

All gone!

He didn't approve at all.

Grumbling, he pulled Yuzuki close to him and his his nose in her short hair, but he frown for it just wasn't the same. With a growl he rolled away from him and tried to get comfy. He tried using his own hair to go t sleep, but his hair was course and rough, not the soft and silky feel of Yuzuki's. If he had to compare Yuzuki's hair, it was like the soft downy feathers of his hawks while his hair was the course hair of his mare's mane.

He wanted his wife's hair back otherwise he won't get a good night's sleep and if he didn't get a good night's sleep, the clan was going to soon share his dark brooding mood.

Izuna honestly couldn't take anymore of his brother's moodiness. A heat wave had struck the area, everyone was complaining about the sticky humid heat. It was so bad that it felt like high noon at midnight. It wasn't pleasant. Combined with Madara's restless nights and the heat, Izuna wasn't happy at all. "Okay, seriously, what is with you?" Izuna asked as he and Madara sat fanning themselves with hand fans that resembled the uchiwa that was their clan symbol.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Madara huffed.

"You are being a pain in the ass! It's been going on for almost two weeks!"

"It's hot at night. It's difficult to sleep when it's like eighty degrees in the middle of the night."

"It's been going on before the heatwave, now spill!"

"I don't need to tell you anything," Madara huffed.

"If you don't get over this... funk of yours, everyone is going to be at each other's throats very, very soon."

"Tch, not my fault nobody is commissioning us," Madara grouched, "maybe I should start something. Have one of the assassin kill some random noble and make it look like Eiji was wanted it and his enemy attacks him. Then he'll be forced to use us."

"At least with a war you can vent your anger," Izuna muttered.

"When was our last battle?"

"Mid June to the first week of July," Izuna replied.

"It's been almost a month! No wonder I'm so on edge," Madara pouted like a spoiled child being denied candy.

"Madara-sama! Message for you," a scout ran up and handed Madara a scroll. He looked at the pitcher of ice water and licked his dry lips. Madara growled.

"Go away," he waved his hand at the scout, who bobbed his head and ran off. Madara gave a vicious grin. "Izuna, good news," Madara's eyes lit up with a demonic battle-hungry luster.

"Hm?" Izuna looked at his brother.

"We are going to war."

"When are you leaving?" Yuzuki asked as they lied in bed. Both, she and Madara had kicked the blanket off of them and as far away from each other as their mosquito netting would allow.

Madara looked at her then back through fine mesh netting. "Day after tomorrow," he replied with a weary sigh.

"How long will you be gone?"

"Return end of August."

"I see," Yuzuki nodded.

"Hn." Madara smirked, "You get this big bed all to yourself."

"Joy," Yuzuki sighed.

"I thought you'd be happy with me gone?"

"I..." Yuzuki bit her lip. "I will... miss you," she blushed.

"Really?" Madara blinked, before a smile slid across his lips. "You know... why don't you show me just how much you'll miss me, hmm." He rested his hand on her thigh, but she slapped it away.

"It's too hot, I'm already drenched in sweat," Yuzuki pointed out.

"Hn," he wiped his brow, "good point."

"Well... night," she closed her eyes and tried to think of not sweating to death. Madara sighed as well and reached out to play with her short hair.

"While I'm gone... Yuzuki," he gulped.

"Yes?"

"Grow your hair back," he ordered.

Yuzuki blinked but mutely nodded.

The army left in two days as Madara said they would, and they didn't return until the end of September. Yuzuki watched as the look out beat the large drum, signaling the return of the army. Family members rushed to greet the returning shinobi or weep in despair at the news of the death of their loved one. As usual, Yuzuki stayed at the house, not wanting to be apart of the welcoming mob. She wondered if Madara was hurt by this. Seeing his kinsmen being greeted upon their return by their loved ones and his wife not being among the crowd. She wondered if it hurt him, for he never voiced any complaint.

Yuzuki finally spotted Madara walking up to her; his red armour with fresh new notches and blood stains. He looked tired but oddly happy. "You grew your hair out," he stated.

"Uh... yes," she tugged at the now shoulder length tresses. She was glad she could finally put it up in a half-bun again. "I did," she nodded.

He looked up her and down. "You looked hideous with short hair," he strode passed her and she shrieked in response.

"That's all you say when you greet your wife! State an observation and then call her ugly?" Yuzuki shouted.

Madara turned and looked at her, "Well I will tell you one thing. I didn't miss your shrill rants," he made a show of rubbing his ear. "I'm tired. I'm hot. I would like to take a nice bath and relax for a while."

"You? Relaxing? Has the world stopped spinning!"

"I can relax!"

"You never bother to say anything nice to me! For the seven months I've been here, you have yet to say anything nice to me. Just one complement, that's all I'm asking for."

"Oh, so your fishing for complements now, huh?"

"No... well... a little. I just want to know if it's worth it," Yuzuki bit her lip.

"Worth what?"

"My feelings for you... erm... budding feelings for you. I was worried about you... this time," Yuzuki mumbled.

"Tch," Madara snorted, "you shouldn't worry. Hashirama is the only man that comes close to being able to kill me. And for that," Madara paused, "I respect him. Now, is that all?"

"No, complement me."

"Pardon?" Madara stared at her.

"Complement me."

"Er..." Madara rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Do you want me to go first?" she asked.

"Hn," he jerked his head down in what could be considered a nod. Yuzuki smiled and walked up to him.

"I like your eyes. They are beautiful... when you don't have your Sharingan activated."

"M-My eyes?" Madara blinked. He suddenly wondered why he felt so warm. His cheeks tinted slightly. He looked away, trying to hide his slight blush.

"Yes, your eyes. Now it's your turn."

"M-My turn?" he gulped, glanced at her and shuffled around she couldn't really see his face. "I... I like your hair," he forced out. "It's... soft and... silky."

"You like my hair," Yuzuki blinked before blushing shyly.

Madara gave a curt jerk of his head before storming off, muttering something about getting out of his armour.

Aah, this little thing wouldn't leave me alone. I wanted to write today. I wanted to do something with Madara and Yuzuki... this was churned out.

Lols, yes Madara likes Yuzuki's soft and silky hair. XD

Tanin means "not related by blood" it's a better term to use for Yuzuki than gaijin which means outsider and refers more specifically to non-Japanese foreigners. Google that shit. Tanin still implies that Yuzuki wasn't born Uchiha but rather married into the clan and thus has to earn the acceptance.

Uuuhh... mosquito netting is common in Japan during the summer. Yuzuki's hair grows fast. Hair and nails tend to grow faster in warm climates. Trust me, I would know. I clipped my fingernails one week and the next week I'd need to clip them again, gods I hated Florida.

A reboot of this will appear in SotM.

Now, I'm going to post this and hunt for my damn cat. Little bugger won't stay with me. Riiight after Live To Tell The Tale is over. XD Kyaa, Nightwish!

Minamoto Eiji is the daimyo for the provinence that Madara lives in. Eiji is the Uchiha clan's lord-retainer/daimyo. Uchiha respond to his military needs first and he "rents out" use of the Uchiha clan to other nobles that are willing to pay his steep (insanely high) price for using his shinobi clan. All wars/battles Uchiha fights NOT on the behalf of Eiji are called "commissions".

It should be noted that Madara really really really doesn't like Eiji.

R'n'R

Sanguinary Toxicity