„Originally we had planned to hand the entire mission over to a new team", Hershel began their briefing, not even trying to gloss over things. Daryl had messed up big time, and while he was not going to throw around any accusations at this time, nor threaten him with grounding or eviction from TE, he was not going to pamper him either. Sure enough, he felt a kind of mental flinch from Daryl at this statement. It couldn't be helped, though. There was no explaining things away in this case. He went on.
„The agent of our new team, however, is of minority descent and wasn't comfortable about exposing himself to the level this mission requires. His guide requested that the two of you come back to work on the main part of the mission, while the other team …" He hesitated briefly over how to phrase Rick's request before he continued. „The other team will stay in the background. The agent will be given assignments in the area that were originally scheduled for a later time. They will be pulled forward so he can be in the vicinity and be there within minutes if Carol needs help - faster than either of us", he added with a mental nod at Daryl.
It was Carol, of course, who interceded on Daryl's behalf. „Please, Hershel", she begged him through their three-way link, not trying to hide her plea from Daryl as she believed it was important that he know she was stepping up for him. „Stop being so hard on him. He knows it was wrong. If he'd been there, he would have stayed. There's no need to belabor this." They both felt surprise from Daryl, but he didn't try to speak up.
Hershel sighed in defeat. „You two are impossible", he complained. „You both know, of course, that I would have to hand him over to a new supervisor at the very least, right? Letting the two of you work together again after what he's done is completely unheard of, and now you're defending him?" More crushing guilt from Daryl. He had certainly never received anything of the kind from Rick after he had left Daryl behind to die. Hershel angrily told himself to focus again. Now was not the time to think about this entire mess in detail - he would do that once both teams had been briefed. Or after the mission. Or never, preferably.
„But of course I am defending him", Carol answered matter-of-factly, surprising him as well as Daryl. „I won't deny that I felt betrayed, and abandoned - but I have been working with Daryl for weeks now. And I have to tell you that he has been the most considerate and respectful guide I have ever worked with, so I can't believe that he did … that … without a very good reason."
Daryl, who was lying on his bed because his ankle was hurting like hell from walking home in the cold and the painkillers hadn't kicked in yet, perked up on hearing this. He instantly opened a secondary link with Hershel and all but yelled at him. „Did you tell her about me?"
His fury felt hot through their link, and Hershel shrank back from it. He had known that Daryl was short-fused, just like his brother, but this was an entirely new level of rage. He shook his head in the privacy of his living room. „Of course not", he scoffed. „You know I won't tell anyone about that. I know how you feel about it, and it would make you identifiable into the bargain."
Daryl seemed to jerk back from him almost physically. „And that's your main reason?" he asked coldly, sounding wounded underneath the superficial scorn. „It makes me identifiable? That's it?" He withdrew completely, abruptly closing the link with Hershel, and distanced himself in their joint link with Carol. Hershel sighed. It certainly felt as if he were walking on eggshells here, and trampling quite a few of them - when he himself hadn't wronged anyone originally. This whole situation was crazy.
He decided to just continue with their briefing instead of trying to work through the layers of wounded feelings here. „Carol, I appreciate you agreeing to doing this, and I'm sure Daryl does, too. As you both know, this is just the preparation stage for a large-scale offensive, and timing is crucial." Looking at his notes for a moment, he paused briefly at a sound from the hallway, but it was only a neighbor closing their front door - he was still alone in his apartment, with both of his daughters at work. „Giving a new team time to ease into this mission from scratch would have cost us a lot of valuable time, and we are all grateful that you're doing this."
As he could feel Carol squirming from his praise, he finally decided to spare her further discomfort and just get on with it. „The backup team, as we're calling it, will only have to be briefed on the small, individual missions they will be carrying out, instead of having to go through all the material that you have already assembled for the big mission", he continued, his tone businesslike once more. He felt both of his charges relaxing infinitesimally and dared to smile to himself.
„As this is an exceptional situation, the agent, Glenn, will be given your description, Carol. As he will be the one to come in in case of an emergency, he needs to know who it is he'll be helping." He could sense Daryl seething at this. „I can't help it, Daryl", he added quietly. „Depending on the location from which you're working on any given day, there's no way you could be there in time if something happened." He felt surprise from Carol and realized that, until now, neither of them had known they lived in the same city.
Daryl, however, was still noticeably upset and seemed about to protest. Hershel had known what he was in for when preparing for this briefing. Very softly, acknowledging what all three of them knew to be true, he said, „I know you would go to her aid at once if she needed it, and not care about the danger to yourself. I know you would do anything at all to save her. But you won't be close enough, and -„
Hershel fell silent, and Daryl knew what he meant. Hershel could almost feel him deflating, disappointed, angry and disgusted with himself. „I could do it", he ground out, his mental voice dark and full of sorrow. „You know I wouldn't hold back."
Sensing Daryl's anger and self-loathing through their meld, and aware that Carol was feeling it as well and probably couldn't understand it, Hershel wanted desperately to reassure him. „I do know you would do everything in your power to help Carol", he said quietly. „I know that leaving her wasn't like you - and it seems she knows it as well. I know your reasons for leaving her like that, and I also know it will never happen again." He paused for a moment, bracing himself. There was no easy way to say this, and he knew he was going to hurt Daryl. „But we both know you can't be there quickly, even if you're close, and you can't fight. It has to be someone else."
The spike of heartache that he got from Daryl was painfully intense, but he didn't withdraw from it. The least he could do after throwing this at Daryl was ride it out. After all, Daryl couldn't escape the facts either - he had to live with them every day.
Taking a deep breath, Hershel went on, bracing himself for an outburst. „If everything goes as planned, neither of you will get into contact with the guide, Rick. He will work only with Glenn, and won't link with either of you except in an extreme emergency. Carol, you and Rick will receive enough information about each other to be able to link up if necesary. Daryl and Rick already know each other -„ He had no real idea how to go on, and Daryl instantly jumped into the breach anyway.
„You can't be serious", Daryl all but whispered. „This can't be the same guy." Hershel felt his rage building, and he couldn't say he blamed him. Highly agitated, Daryl swung his legs off the bed and got to his feet. Both Carol and Hershel felt the pain stabbing through his left leg as he started pacing back and forth between his bed and the door, too upset over what he had just learned to care about what he was accidentally bleeding into their meld. Carol's heart ached for him as she realized, while sensing him limping through his room, why it couldn't be Daryl who physically came to her help if she should need it.
Consciously staying away from Hershel, whom she didn't want to know how deeply she cared for someone she was not supposed to get attached to, she approached Daryl, allowing him to sense her concern for him. She moved toward him slowly, giving him time to withdraw if he should have to, taking into account how upset he was, and careful to respect his need to distance himself - she didn't want to scare him off, after all. He felt hot and rough and edgy to her - only barely in control of his raging emotions. There were red flashes of raw, angry pain with every other step he took. The visual impressions of her approach came as a surprise to her - normally being in a meld with someone else wasn't a visual experience for her.
Remembering the very first time his mind had touched hers, the gentle, careful way in which he had held and soothed her essence to keep her safe during their first contact, she now did the same for him, her mind brushing his … tenderly, and she felt him responding almost instantly. She sensed him gradually relaxing, like an engine ticking softly as it cooled down, and was amazed at how readily he reacted to her touch. He was still angry, but no longer out of control.
„Carol will not be working with him", Daryl stated, noticeably restraining himself. Carol's touch on his mind was like ointment on an angry burn, quenching a thirst he hadn't even known he'd been feeling. Being this close to her mind, he felt safe and protected and … what? What was it he felt? What was this nameless feeling? … as never before in his life.
He let go of his rage, exhaling softly. Alone in his room, he leaned against Merle's battered old wardrobe for a moment, closing his eyes, contrentrating only on taking deep, regular breaths. That feeling of … protection … and safety … and something else … was all but enveloping him, like a warm blanket keeping a sharp wind at bay.
From lightyears away he heard Hershel's voice. „As I said, they will only link in an -„
„- extreme emergency, I heard you", Daryl interrupted Hershel rudely. „We both know what Rick Grimes does in extreme emergencies. She will not be working with him. I know I fucked up with her and Esnik. But while we're doing this, and until Carol says otherwise, I'm still her guide, and I'll be responsible for her safety." They both felt him fighting for breath - he was still bursting with agitation, and his body was reacting badly to it. „He won't do to her in an extreme emergency what he did to me. Once was enough." Without caring to explain himself to Carol, who was completely bewildered at this point, he left their meld without another word.
Hershel sighed.
.-.
Both Carol and Daryl received an information package on Glenn Rhee, the agent of the backup team, who was going to support Carol in case she needed help as she continued working on their mission. It was uploaded to their computers within an hour of their meld with Hershel. As neither Carol nor Daryl were supposed to link up with his guide, it was Daryl who would be calling him in directly at Carol's request if the need should arise.
Daryl made sure to ask her if she had received any information on Rick Grimes as well, and was only satisfied when she swore by all that was holy that she hadn't. She was still confused by his violent reaction to this other guide, but neither Hershel nor Daryl himself cared to explain the situation to her - it wasn't necessary for her to understand, the information might be enough to make either Daryl or Rick identifiable, and so she would have to go without it.
She accepted this, but wasn't happy with it. There was some dark secret hidden in here somewhere, and it concerned Daryl and this other guide, Rick. It seemed they had history, not all of it good, and she was concerned that Daryl might come to harm over this in some way. Maybe this was related to the event that he had dreamed about - maybe this Rick had been his guide when he had run into that Feina and been injured. Knowing this much made her grateful for Daryl stepping in to prevent Rick from getting into contact with her. She was still disappointed with him for leaving her alone with Esnik without giving her any explanation during their discussion at the bus stop. But after connecting the dots, linking his panic in that situation to the event he had dreamed about, she trusted him completely again, especially over this issue - if he thought Rick wouldn't be good for her, she wanted nothing to do with the guy.
After this unscheduled four day break, they went back to their mission, and she was curious to find out if she would get to meet this Gleen Rhee.
.-.
Settling in at his desk at his office, Rick opened his link with Glenn. He was slightly miffed that the main team's guide had spoken up against him contacting either the agent or the guide of the other team, but at the same time this kept things simple for him. If things stayed simple, maybe they would be in and out without any problems within a few days' time and he would be home free. He had already informed Tyreese that this would be his last mission, unaware of the fact that Glenn had done the same.
Straightening his jacket, which he'd hung over the back of his chair, he leaned back and opened the TE laptop sitting on his desk. Going over the map of the target area, he made sure that Glenn was in the right location for today's assignment and started guiding him toward his mission objective.
.-.
Glenn went over Carol's description again in his mind as he set out toward the police station he was going to investigate today. Of course he didn't want her to get into any real danger, but as far as he knew, this was the first time that two teams were cooperating to finish one overarching mission, and he was curious to see how this might work out. He kept looking about himself surrepititiously on his way to the police station, hoping to just run into her by accident.
.-.
After going through her information package on Glenn, Carol knew now that he was Asian, and considerably younger than herself. She kept looking around for him, trying to be inconspicuous about it, but at the same time she was terribly afraid that she might run into Ed again. She had no idea how she would react if she were faced with him in the street - or worse yet, if he should expose her and their mission to the Feina.
.-.
Daryl studied the information on Rhee one last time before reaching out, ever so gently. He knew Rick, he knew his mental touch. He knew all too well that Rhee wouldn't be used to subtle, careful touches, so that was what he employed. He brushed by him, hardly touching him, and sensed Rick's link with him. It made him feel sick with disgust.
This young man, whose kindness was already bleeding into the tenuous, one-sided link he had with him, was completely dependent on Rick, just like he himself had been. At the same time, he might be Carol's only hope if she should run into another Feina and get picked up for questioning. He had to make sure that Glenn was safe, so he'd be there should Carol need his help. As he withdrew to set up his link with Carol, he maintained his loose connection with Rhee, constantly reassuring himself that he was okay.
His main meld with Carol was strong as always, and he could sense that she was still preoccupied with something else, but that would have to wait until after this run was over - or maybe even longer if she didn't want to talk about it right away. He still felt guilty over leaving her, as well as keeping the reason for it from her - but he couldn't bring himself to open up to her about what had happened to him, and how it had left him. So why should she trust him?
.-.
Hershel closed his link with Ty and allowed himself to sigh. His friend had just told him that this would be his team's last set of missions - both the guide and the agent had resigned for private reasons before setting out. Hershel felt immensely relieved at this, mainly because of Glenn. He had noticed that his daughter had been getting ever closer to the young Asian and knew that this relationship had entered a new stage - one that might interfere with secretive terrorist activities. Maggie, of course, would never know, but he was very happy to know that Glenn was putting her first and TE second.
.-.
At the end of this first day of their joint misison, all parties had to agree that it had passed uneventfully. Hershel couldn't have been more relieved.