(10)

Monday morning found Darcy alone in a quiet house. His sister had left earlier with Elizabeth and her aunt to go wedding dress shopping. The ladies had only stayed a few minutes, and he had exchanged little more than greetings with Elizabeth. The relationship between his sister and fiancee was blossoming beautifully though, and was everything he could hope for. He felt his relationship with Elizabeth was moving along, but definitely not as fast as he would like. She was more comfortable in his presence, but she still did not view them as compatible. He knew he had not presented himself well to her from the beginning, and it was up to him to show her who he was and could be. Falling for her had shown him where he had deviated from the man he wished to be, and he was determined to right himself. He wanted to meet her expectations, and not just for her, but because he wanted to be the kind of man who was worthy of her.

His rambling thoughts were interrupted by a commotion in the hall. He stood as he answered the knock on his door with a welcome. Morris opened it to allow his Aunt Fitzwilliam entrance.

"Darcy dear, I do believe you have forgotten to inform me of something rather important. You know how I hate to find out family news from the paper. Now, do you have anything to report?" she began, without even allowing his greeting.

"Good morning, Aunt," he greeted with a bow. "Perhaps you would like to have a seat?"

"They must have it right then, if you want me to be comfortable. I would like to know who she is, but first, did my son know about her and neglect to inform me as well?"

"Ah, if you mean Henry, he knows who she is but he does not know that I am officially engaged. I was not the last I saw him."

"Of course I am referring to my youngest. He may not have known officially, but it sounds as though he knew you were contemplating it. Is there a reason you have been so secretive?"

"Not secretive, but rather quiet, and there are two reasons, actually."

His aunt simply raised her eyebrow and waited.

"Last I saw Henry, I was not sure she would have me. I did not want to say anything before I had her acceptance. Also, her family is in mourning for her father, but we are wedding anyway. We are trying to keep this as quiet as possible for her sake."

"Tsk, the wedding before her mourning is over. Why the hurry? Fitzwilliam Darcy, what have you done?" she scolded.

"Nothing that requires a rush! I have more respect for her than that. Really Aunt, have a little faith in me, please," he replied.

Lady Fitzwilliam smiled, "Just making sure, my dear. I do not doubt you. I would still like to know why you are flouting society and marrying so soon."

"Her family's home was entailed, and the heir is...less than pleasant. They need to move out as soon as possible."

His aunt gave him a shrewd look, "And her mother's settlement does not give them enough to live on? Darcy, how poor is she, exactly?"

"She is the daughter of a landed gentleman," he replied evasively.

"That is not what I asked. Does she even have a penny to her name?"

"Yes," he sighed out, "but not much more."

"I thought you knew better than to fall for a fortune hunter's tricks, young man," the Countess said in a disappointed tone.

"I do know, Aunt, and she is no fortune hunter, of that I am sure."

His aunt did not respond, just waited for Darcy to explain.

He looked away when he said, "She refused me the first time I offered for her, before her father died, simply because she did not like me enough to marry me. She only agreed to marry me when I offered to help remove her remaining family from their current situation." He looked back at his aunt, "Trust me, she is not happy about feeling mercenary. She has made that very clear."

"You are marrying a virtually penniless woman who does not even like you? Whatever for? Are you out of your mind?"

"I love her and she makes me want to be a better man."

"But you just said she does not love you in return. Maybe I am missing something, but I do not think this speaks to future happiness. Will you spend your life trying to be someone you are not just to please a woman who may never return your affection?" she asked in concern. "Darcy, you cannot make someone love you by changing into something you are not. It does not work that way."

He looked uncomfortable at this, but stood his ground, "I do know that. I am not trying to become a different man, but rather a better one. I have failings, failings that I did not see before her. She fearlessly told me where I fall short, and I agree with her. I know that I cannot make her love me."

His aunt watched him quietly for a minute.

"You are taking an awful risk that she may never love you in return. You could spend your life pining for something you will never have. Darcy, are you sure?"

"I am. I have weighed the risk, believe me, and she is worth it. When Elizabeth loves, it is with a fierceness that I have never seen before. I want that. Even if she never comes to love me passionately, even if it is just her familial love, it will be enough."

"You seem to think she is perfect. No one is flawless like that. Are you sure you are not blinding yourself?"

"She has flaws, but I know what they are and I adore her anyway."

"You are set on her?"

"Yes."

"I see that I will not change your mind. Well then, what can we, your uncle and I, do? Do you think we can help her along at all?"

"If you welcome her, show the ton you approve of her, she will be more comfortable. I expect Aunt Catherine to reject her outright. You know what her plans are. If you countered that with acceptance, you would help ease Elizabeth's mind. From what she has said, I think she is afraid of feeling isolated. Georgiana has accepted her with open arms. If you do as well, I think it would help."

"I will need to meet her. I cannot blindly accept a woman I do not know, but I will try to see the best of her, for your sake. Because of my schedule, it will need to be next week, but I will send her an invitation for tea."

"I could not ask for more. She will win you over on her own, you will see."

They moved to other family topics until his aunt made her leave.

When Georgiana returned, she was full of excitement from the shopping trip. She adored Lizzy's taste, Mrs. Gardiner was so kind, and she could not wait for her brother to see his fiancée in her dress. They had tried several basic styles on Lizzy to help her decide, and then had sketches done with fabrics and embellishments. It had been so hard to decide because Lizzy had looked lovely in everything! Georgiana could not tell her brother the details, though, because it would ruin the surprise. He should just be ready to be stunned.

She dashed around his desk, kissed his cheek and thanked him for giving her the best sister ever and then whirled out of the study as quickly as she had come in. Darcy stared after her in amazement, wishing his Aunt Fitzwilliam could have seen Elizabeth's impact on his up to recently dispirited sister.

Elizabeth received a letter from her mother on Wednesday. It was not long, but very much appeared to have been written in haste, which did not surprise her.

Longbourn, Monday, May 11

Lizzy,

You sly thing! Not a word when your handsome suitor dropped you off, and here you were, on the verge of betrothal! I do not know how you managed to snap him up, Mr. Darcy is so rich I expected him to want a wife as beautiful and demure as Jane. What he sees in you, I do not know. But Mrs. Darcy, oh how well that sounds! You will be so rich! Ten thousand pounds a year, and likely more! You will have such pin money! Lord bless me, we are saved! What a clever girl you were, to reject Mr. Collins for Mr. Darcy. Your cousin and Longbourn are nothing to Mr. Darcy and Pemberley! What good thinking, to marry him as soon as you can, you would not want him to change his mind. Your stupid cousin said some foolish nonsense about him already being engaged, maybe you should get a special license and hook him before that other girl can claim him. A consummated marriage cannot be overturned by anything, so be sure to do your duty on the wedding night. Do not worry about waiting for us to have the wedding either, we can celebrate later! Maybe in a smart house in town that you take for your poor, dear, mother. Your sisters will meet so many rich men now, and we need them to do it in style! We can give them such a proper coming out! Remember when you are buying all of your fine things that your sisters will need new clothes for the Season. Do you suppose you can get them vouchers to Almack's? My Lydia will get an earl at least, I am sure! - Yours, etc.

Elizabeth was mortified. This letter was an embodiment of the behavior that Mr. Darcy had pointed out in his letter. She was still torn about him saying what he had about her family. She appreciated honesty in others, but at what point should tact filter that honesty? Could she blame him when she felt the same way though? She loved her mother, and was glad that her marriage would put her mind at ease, but Mrs. Bennet could be very ridiculous. She hoped they would be able to reign her in when she visited town for the wedding. She would need to speak with her aunt about how to keep Mrs. Bennet busy.

The following day, Elizabeth received a letter from her sister Mary. It was not often that she received letters from Mary, and she was surprised. The last had been the express Mary had sent to announce their father's death. She had a slight sense of foreboding as she opened it, even though this one had arrived in the regular post. She saw that it contained an additional short note from her youngest two sisters. She started with the one from Mary.

Longbourn, Tuesday, May 12

My Dear Sister,

While I write to congratulate you on your engagement, I feel I ought to warn you that Mr. Collins believes Mr. Darcy is already engaged to Miss Anne de Bourgh. If that be the case, my dear sister, I urge you to extract yourself from your promise to a man you know to not be free to marry. It is imperative that a young woman conduct herself with the utmost integrity at all times. If you find yourself taken in by an undeserving member of the opposite sex, it is best show yourself above that behavior. Scorn him, cast him off, but do not allow him to ruin you and your family with his immoral behavior.

Mary continued on, sharing several moral extracts from Fordyce's Sermons before closing the letter.

The note from Kitty and Lydia was as follows:

Lizzy,

We do not know how you can possibly stand to marry such a stiff, boring man! A soldier like Denny or Wickham would make so much better of a husband. Do not tell Mr. Darcy we said so, though. We do not want him to take offense and refuse us gifts. And he is better than Mr. Collins. That man has been storming around the house in high dudgeon since Sunday church because you are marrying Mr. Darcy. He is probably just bitter because you would not marry him. To be so rich! Do you think we can buy new dresses in London for the wedding? Will you have an account at a modiste in town? Maria Lucas will be so jealous!

Kitty and Lydia

After reading both of the notes, Elizabeth rested her head in her lap. These letters may be private, but they were both perfect examples of how the writers conducted themselves, even in public. They appeared to be unchanged by the death of their father and their reduced circumstances. While her youngest two sisters were very young, they ought to conduct themselves better than this, especially since they were all 'out.'

Appropriate to say or not, it was becoming difficult for her to hold a grudge against Mr. Darcy for stating fact. Since the Netherfield ball she had been more acutely aware of her family's behavior, and had often found it wanting. She was grateful she had not seen him yesterday, nor was she anticipating seeing him today. Even if he did not know what they contained, her embarrassment at the letters she had received in the past two days would make it difficult to face him.

That evening found Bingley visiting Darcy, per the latter's request. Darcy would have gone to his friend, but he wanted privacy for this discussion, and there was none to be had where his friend was staying. Miss Bingley's curiosity would not let them alone.

Darcy found himself growing anxious near the appointed hour, afraid of losing one of the few close friends he had after this evening.

He heard the commotion of entry in the hall and braced himself.

"How are you, Morris?" he heard Bingley ask as the door was opening.

"Perfectly well, thank you for asking, sir," was Morris' monotone response. He looked up and asked, "Mr. Darcy, do you need anything else, sir?"

"No, that will be all, thank you Morris."

"Yes sir," said the butler as he closed the door.

"You are looking more serious than usual Darcy, what is the matter?" asked Bingley.

"Good evening to you too, Bingley. How are you?"

Bingley watched him for a moment before responding, "I am fine, but you look like someone died. You have bad news for me, don't you?"

"I do. Before I begin, please just let me say that I am sorry. You are one of the few good friends I have, and I hope that you still consider yourself as such when I finish."

"My God, what happened?!"

"Many things; primarily Mr. Bennet of Longbourn has died, I am engaged to Miss Elizabeth Bennet, and we are to wed in four weeks."

Bingley stared at him in shock, "You are engaged to Miss Elizabeth? Jane's father is dead?" He was quiet for a moment before asking, "Why are you marrying so soon? Is Miss Elizabeth not still in mourning?"

"She is. I believe you were aware that their family home was entailed to their cousin, Mr. Collins?" He waited for his friend's nod before continuing, "The family did not inherit much to live on, and they are currently being very unwillingly kept on by the Collinses."

"Wait, how long ago did Mr. Bennet die?"

"About a month."

Bingley looked disgusted, "And Collins already came to claim his inheritance from a newly widowed woman and her five daughters? What are they going to do?"

"He did, and Elizabeth agreed to marry me if I took care of her family," he was not thrilled about sharing that, but had decided full disclosure was needed. His friend deserved his complete honesty.

Bingley thought about what he had said for a moment, "She would not have married you otherwise? Are you sure, Darcy? I know she was not fond of you in Hertfordshire, but I cannot believe a girl in her circumstances would tell you no."

"She had already refused me. I had offered for her the day before she found out about her father, and she did refuse, quite vehemently."

How had Bingley known that Elizabeth did not like him before? Had it been that obvious to everyone but him?

"But you are engaged now. Did you ask her again after she found out about Mr. Bennet? Darcy, that was not very considerate of you. The poor girl was not in a place to be answering for her entire future."

"I am aware of that, but I also knew that their circumstances are very low now. I was afraid for her, and wanted to make sure she knew that I was still an option. She asked for a few weeks to think about it, and I agreed. We only became engaged about ten days ago."

"I suppose that makes sense. You said she had refused you quite vehemently, though. What did she particularly have against you, and does she still hold onto it? You warned me against marrying a woman who did not feel the same for me. You do love her, I assume?" At Darcy's nod he continued, "Did she change her mind so quickly?"

Darcy braced himself, "In short, she refused me the first time because she did not like me, and no, she has not entirely changed her mind. I am working on that. This is where I must ask your forgiveness. Among other things, she accused me of 'ruining, perhaps forever, the happiness of a most beloved sister.' My cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, had repeated to her some comments I had made about separating you from Miss Bennet. He did not realise that the lady I spoke of was Elizabeth's sister. I was wrong Charles, Elizabeth has told me Jane Bennet was in love with you."

Bingley looked stricken and was silent for a full minute before saying quietly, "You say Jane was in love with me. Not that I deserve to still have it, since I was the one who abandoned her, but you are saying that I missed my chance and she no longer loves me?"

"I do not know. Elizabeth believes she still does, but she cannot be sure."

Bingley dropped his head into his hands. Darcy felt terrible. He might have thought he was following the right course at the time, but that did not stop him from feeling like an ass for putting his friend through this.

"She was abandoned by me, her father died, and now she is losing her home. I feel so terrible for her."

"I am sorry, Charles. I should not have convinced you to walk away from her. Even if I was right about her not loving you, I should have offered my opinion without talking you out of finding out for yourself. I apologize for not giving you the credit of thinking for yourself. It was wrong of me."

Bingley kept his head down for several minutes before he sat up, face pale, and replied, "I have been questioning leaving her for weeks, but I was not sure of myself enough to do something about it. I should be man enough to make my own decisions, not let you do it for me. I might not be happy with you for being wrong, but it is my own fault that Miss Bennet feels abandoned."

"You are not angry with me?"

"I do not think I will be following your advice to the letter anymore, but no, I am not angry. I genuinely believe you did what you felt best, and you have never led me astray before."

"There is a little more that you should be aware of, so that if you decide to pursue Miss Bennet again, you are not surprised." Darcy took a deep breath and braced himself, if his friend forgave him this interference, he would be lucky indeed, "Miss Bennet was in town from the beginning of January up to a month ago. She visited Miss Bingley early on, and your sister returned the visit several weeks later, making it clear she wanted to end the acquaintance. I had advised Miss Bingley to do this, thinking that you were not safe from Miss Bennet yet. I knew Miss Bennet was in town the entire time, and concealed it from you. Again, I am sorry."

Bingley looked horrified, "My sister has all but cut her?" He added in a strangled voice, "And you told her to?"

Darcy closed his eyes, "Yes, and I am not proud of my behavior. It was deceitful and beneath me."

He opened his eyes to look at Bingley, who appeared seriously annoyed.

Bingley rose and started to pace around the room, "I am not surprised by Caroline, she does not think the Bennets are good enough, and she is selfish, but really Darcy? Jane has every right to hate me! How am I supposed to recover from that? What were you thinking?!"

Darcy did not think that his friend was looking for an actual answer while he blustered. Bingley continued his march around the room, throwing his hands in the air and muttering for a few minutes.

He finally sat back down and asked, "What do you think I should do? How do I recover from this?"

"You still want my help?" Darcy asked in surprise.

"Well, you broke this, you can tell me how to fix it!" responded his friend.

"Bingley, you are entirely too forgiving. My God man, I would probably have refused to talk to you ever again!"

"Is that what you want? We are friends Darcy, practically brothers. We forgive one another. We also get each other out of scrapes. If you help me get out of this one, we might become brothers in truth. Yes I am annoyed, but I will get over it, especially if you figure out how to get Jane Bennet to forgive me."

Darcy just stared at Bingley. How did he get so lucky, to have a friend this forgiving? How was his friend this forgiving? He would do nearly anything to help Bingley at this point.

"If it helps, Elizabeth told me she thinks you will make an excellent brother. We are both on your side, and we will do what we can to help Jane along. She will be Elizabeth's bridesmaid, and I was hoping you would be my groomsman. It would put you two together and give you opportunities to speak to her. I have not asked Elizabeth yet, but I cannot believe she would object to having Jane stay with us after the wedding. Perhaps time together would be enough."

"You think so? I hope so. I cannot believe she loved me! She is such an angel! When will she be back in town? I cannot wait to see her again."

And Bingley was back to being Bingley.

The following day, Darcy called on Elizabeth. He wished to see her and he needed to tell her that Bingley had agreed to stand with him at the wedding, as long as Jane did not object. Hoping for another, but hopefully better, private conversation, he suggested a walk that was happily accepted.

After she had gathered her outerwear and they were out of the house, she thanked him.

"I do not get nearly enough exercise in the city. I miss my country lanes!"

"I am sorry to hear that you are feeling stifled, but I am glad I can bring you some relief." He hesitated here, but decided to add, "I imagine that you will greatly enjoy getting to know Pemberley's park; it is ten miles round."

"You will likely need to send search parties out for me, I will ramble myself so far away! What fun, to explore so much," she replied happily. "I hope you have many miles of paths. As much as I love a ramble through ungroomed woods, I suppose it would not do to come home covered in burrs and briar scratches. My mother's conniptions finally ended that when I was about fourteen, along with most of my tree climbing, and I guess it would not be appropriate to start again at one and twenty as a married woman."

She looked over at him with mischievously sparkling eyes and his breath caught. He would not mind watching her climb a tree now and then.

"Perhaps not, but I will not tell anyone if it happens from time to time. I would hate to deny you the pleasure. Besides, is that not what long sleeves and gloves are for?"

"You might want to be careful what you promise. I will keep you to it, sir!"

Darcy had never seen her so relaxed with him. He did not know what had caused it, but he was grateful. After the difficult discussion the evening before, he needed to have some acceptance. Bingley might be forgiving him, but he had still strained their friendship.

He hoped a serious topic would not ruin her good mood when he said, "I spoke with Mr. Bingley last night. He will stand with me at the wedding, as long as your sister does not object. He does not want to stand in between you and your sister on your wedding day, though."

"I will write to Jane about it. I am sure she will not object. Was he very angry?"

"Not as much as a he could have been. He was very forgiving, but then Bingley often is. He has a soft heart, especially for those he cares about."

"Lucky for you."

"Yes," he answered simply.

"It is why you were worried that Jane would marry him without love, was it not? He would be too easy to take advantage of?"

"It is. Charles is the kind of man who would give and give until there was nothing left to him. The wrong kind of woman could destroy him. I hope you understand that I meant no disrespect to your sister personally."

"I think I am beginning to see that. To help put your mind at ease, Jane is the kindest soul I have ever known. She would treat Mr. Bingley's heart with the care it deserves, if given the chance."

"I am glad to hear it."

There was a pleasant pause in the conversation.

"Mr. Darcy, I ought to tell you that Mr. Collins is telling everyone back home that you are engaged to your cousin, Miss de Bourgh."

Darcy sighed inwardly, so much for peaceful conversation.

"And do you believe him?"

"No," she looked at him seriously, "you would not have asked me if you were already engaged. I may have thought it of you once, but I no longer believe you could be so dishonorable. I would like to know that your aunt has no hold of any kind over you for this, though."

"I can reassure you of that. I never even heard my parents speak of it. Lady Catherine started in on the idea of my and Anne's marriage after my father died. There is definitely nothing written down." He added quietly, "Thank you for believing in me."

Elizabeth smiled and gently squeezed his arm where she held it, "I know now that you are a man of honor, I am sorry that I could not see it before."

They moved to other topics and finished their walk pleasantly. Before taking his leave, Darcy warned Elizabeth that his aunt, the Countess Fitzwilliam, would be inviting her and her aunt to tea the following week. He reassured her that the Countess was nothing like Lady Catherine, much to Elizabeth's relief. Darcy was very pleased at Elizabeth's blush when he kissed her hand. The last two days had turned out so much better than he could have ever expected.

A/N: Cool bit of fact, there was an Earl Fitzwilliam (4th Earl in his line) alive at the time of P&P. William Fitzwilliam had four sisters and one brother. His wife, Charlotte, was descended from the 3rd Duke of Devonshire (first common ancestor of Prince Charles and Lady Diana) and was the daughter of an earl herself. Where this breaks is the Colonel though, since they only had one son, Charles, who held the honorary title of Viscount Milton until he succeeded his father to become the 5th Earl. The Earl and Countess would be acceptable ages, but Charles would only be about 26 in 1812, not quite old enough to be the Colonel's older brother. I've named Colonel Fitzwilliam Henry after his mother's family, since it was so common to name sons after family. It's a little far removed, but not something weird (Brabazon - seriously) or another William, Frederick, or Charles.

I was avoiding naming any characters that Ms. Austen herself hadn't, but I find I can't keep that up. It would be weird for Lady Fitzwilliam to call her son by his rank and last name, and I couldn't really add her at all without something to call her. I like the idea of an antithesis to Lady Catherine, who is coming up next. :)

Kunoichi of the Moonlit Night - your comment was the inspiration behind having Lizzy get a bunch of letters from Longbourn. I'm glad you said it, because I agree, I wanted to see their reactions too! Thank you!