* Note * I just realized how similar this is to my other self-injury story. :O. Haha, I'm glad you all like it. :D.

As the days passed, more scars started to appear on both my arms. It had only been over a week since the almost stabbing, and I had several scars covering my arms. I wouldn't go anywhere without a coat, despite the weather. There was no way I'd let anyone see any of my scars. I'm not even sure what I'd say if that were to happen. A cat scratched me, perhaps? Although, I'm not sure if that would be reasonable enough if someone saw all my scars.

I suppose that's never going to happen, will it? Of course not.

I heard the phone ringing. Dad probably wasn't up yet, or whoever was in bed with him. So, I decided to get it. I walked quickly to the living room and checked the caller I.D.

"Great," I muttered when I saw the name on the phone. Degrassi School Board. I wonder what they were calling me for. Probably to punish me. Gah, my life sucks.

"Hello," I said into the phone.

"Hello the Goldsworthy family. This is Principal Simpson. I'm calling you to tell you that there's going to be a few changes to Degrassi. As you may know, there was an incident at our last dance. There was a student stripping in an empty classroom, and there was a student with a lethal weapon. I'm here to tell you that there's a new security system at Degrassi. There will be police at every door and in every hallway. Students will have to show them their own personal pass and I.D. There's also going to be a strict dress code. In the mail, I will send you the new uniforms along with a book of all these new rules. Thank you for listening. Goodbye." He hung up the phone and I dropped the phone, hearing a loud thud.

My hands formed into fists on the table and my body started shaking rapidly. Uniforms. Police all around. Degrassi was turning into hell, and I didn't like one bit of it. It was going to be like a private school. I didn't exactly know what a private school was like, but I thought they wore uniforms. Maybe Degrassi was going to become a private school. I already didn't want to go anymore. I didn't want to go to any school. I just wanted to be alone, for the rest of my life. No Dad, no worries, no nothing.

I felt the need to cut then, and that's exactly what I did.

I rolled up my sleeve, and found the perfect place to do what I needed to do.

Cutting had started to become an addiction. I was living in this cold world called my life, and it was the only thing I had left to feel… good again. Nobody would ever make me feel that way again. Not one single person. Not any family, or friends, or even Julia if she were still alive.

Thinking of her made my heart break all over again.

You murderer! Killer! You deserve to die! Those were the thoughts floating in my head. They were all true. I was a murderer. I killed Julia, in a way. Because of that, I do deserve to die. If only I wasn't too chicken to do it myself…

Rather than suicide, I just cut myself more. It was a better punishment, anyway. No one would ever know, and it felt better. Much better.

I heard a door open, and I quickly put away the broken plastic and rolled my sleeve back to where it should that. That was close, I thought. Although, it would matter much if Dad saw. He'd just yell at me and tell me I deserve it.

"Wow, you're actually up before noon!" Dad exclaimed.

"I was up before noon yesterday," I reminded him.

"Yeah," he opened the fridge, shuffling items in it. "But if I hadn't woken you up yesterday, then you would've slept all damn day."

I sighed loudly.

He must've heard me, because then he said, "It's the truth, son."

"Yeah, yeah."

"You hungry?" he asked softly.

"Not really," I admitted.

"Good." Wow, I hated him so much. "Then you can make me and Sylvia some breakfast."

"Great," I mumbled.

"Don't give me any attitude!" he yelled.

"I wasn't!" I lied, then got some pancake mix out of the cupboard. Whenever he had a girl over, he made me cook. Probably so she wouldn't have to taste his dreadful food. He only made that for me. At least when Mom was living with us she cooked everything. She was such a wonderful cook, too…

"Who called?" he asked as he read the sports section of the newspaper.

"School—"

He cut me off. "What the hell did you do this time?"

Ugh, why does he always think I did something wrong? Oh yeah, because I'm a terrible person, that's why.

"There's new rules at Degrassi," I told him.

"Like?"

"A new security system, and uniforms."

"Uniforms?" he started cracking up. "You'll look like an idiot with uniforms."

I know, I wanted to say. But instead, I said, "And they'll send those along with the rest of the rules in the mail."

"I better not have to pay for any of this shit, Eli. You already cost enough of my god damn money!"

I turned on the stove and started making the pancakes. "You won't," I promised.

"What's going on?" an annoying voice said. I guessed it was this Sylvia girl. She was half-naked when she walked out of the living room. She had wavy blonde hair and a little makeup on. She wore a tiny nightdress. I saw my dad staring at her chest, and I was disgusted. He had Mom, so why did he have to do this to her? She didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve him.

"Who's this?" the girl asked. "You're brother?"

"Actually," I started to say.

"You're right, pumpkin," Dad finished, kissing her hand.

What the hell? Why'd he have to lie about that? Was being a parent really that hard?

"Breakfast's almost done," I announced.

"Perfect!" Sylvia jumped up and down like a little girl. Normally, I would have laughed, but I would never laugh ever again.

"Here you go," I gave them both their plates of food, then cleaned up the mess before Dad would yell at me for it. I ran into my room to cry so no one would have to see me.

I was really starting to hate life.