Hello lovelies, the last chapter (secret: there's also an epilogue).

"Zoey, breakfast is ready!" He yells as he slides the last pancake onto the plate. He drops the pan into the sink and lets cool water run over the heated metal. It makes a hissing sound, little round drops jumping off the hot surface and on to the counter. Nur laughs and claps her hands, apparently this is all it takes for her to be entertained. He turns around, she is covered in jam – head to toe, the half of her uneaten pancake smeared all over her highchair. He takes a photo with his phone and sends it to her. It's already afternoon in London, she'll appreciate the distraction.

"Zoey! Breakfast!" He yells again, before approaching the toddler. He tries to game-plan this, is it better to wipe the food off of her, or to just bathe her. He thinks of having to carry a jam-covered 2 year-old up the stairs and reaches for the wipes.

"Zoey! Get down for breakfast! Now!" He hears the rumble upstairs, doors opening and closing, shuffling, a pat of feet down the stairs. She pokes her head into the kitchen.

"I can't eat. I'm late for my final!" She turns to leave.

"Wait!" He says it in that parental tone, the no-nonsense one that he very rarely uses with her, "You're not going anywhere until you have your breakfast."

She turns around on her heel, but makes no effort to move. "So you'd rather I miss my final, than miss breakfast! Good to know you have your priorities set right." She doesn't sound like herself, or at least not the version he is used to – she was never this cold, this distant with him before; she was never this impossible.

"Well, the way I see it, if it teaches you to come down after the first time I ask, then it's a lesson well worth you flunking your final." He pushes the plate forward on the counter, "You better hurry up, and you might even make it on time."

She comes into the kitchen slowly, looking at him the whole entire time, her eyes narrow, her lips pursed tight. She takes the pancake into her hand and folds it twice over, never taking her eyes off of him, she is daring him, challenging, her stubbornness she got from Liv. She takes a bite of the pancake, then drops the rest on the plate. "I'm done." She says with a smile, her voice smooth and sweet, overly sweet like saccharine, "Thanks, that was a great breakfast." And she walks out. Nur, who's been surprisingly quiet during the whole exchange, entertained by her own attempts to suck jam off her fingers, turns towards him and says, "Oh-oh." Followed by a big clap, her hands missing her nose by a millisecond.

"Oh-oh, indeed." He takes her out of the chair, and carries her upstairs. "Let's get you cleaned up! Kare and Gerry will be here in a couple of hours and they can't squish you the way they want to if you're all sticky and smelly, can they?"

"No-oh?" She says tentatively, as she inspects the bottom of the bath, kicking the water happily.

By the time she is bathed, dressed and changed following an orange juice disaster they are already late to the airport. He forgets her snack bag on the counter. It's barely 10 am and the day is already a disaster. The traffic is horrendous and Nur is fussy the whole entire time. He tries to play her some music on his phone, but the battery is low. There's no food or juice in the car and the time seems to be both standing still and flying by. They make it to the airport just in time, Karen and Gerry are waiting by the exit already – seemingly arguing. Goody – just what the day needed.

They seem happy to see him, but not as happy as they are to see her. Karen takes her to get a banana and a juice, while Ger helps him load their bags into the car.

"What were you arguing about?" He asks, once they're all settled in the car. Karen and Gerry exchange looks, followed by puffs and then a couple of stuck out tongues. To think one of them is going to Harvard, and the other is about the start Columbia. He does not have the energy for this, not today. "Either you tell me now, or I am going to call your respective boyfriends and find out. And let's imagine that for a moment, Nur and I conference calling your two lovely young men, waking them up at – what's the time in California now, ah right, 8 am on the first Friday of their break, and asking them why my kids are arguing. Now, if you're not in love with option one, one of you better spit it out."

"Karen's dropping out of college!"

"I can't believe you told him!" She shrieks. "You're taking a gap year, which is basically not going to college, so you really shouldn't be speaking! Idiot!"

"Moron."

"Done!" He yells, and they quiet down, except for-

"Oh-oh." It takes all his strength not to chuckle.

"Karen, you first. Gerry I swear if you as much as utter a word while she's speaking you'll be on Nur's potty training duty."

"I'm not dropping out. I am taking time out. I want to travel. And if I decide that I want to go back to school then that's what I'll do. But I don't want to do it just because I feel like I should."

"Right, and how will you afford your travels?" He looks at her in the rearview mirror. She rolls her eyes and sighs. How did he get here? How did he become the grown up? The one who has to ruin her dreams and give her a reality check? God, he hated when his own father did that.

"I have my trust fund." She says, without looking at him, suddenly fascinated by Nur's car seat.

He laughs, then realizes she's being serious, "No, no, you don't have your trust fund, until a) you graduate, or b) turn 30. So how are you planning on paying for your trip?"

"I'll work then!" She says defiantly, while wiping Nur's hands and throwing the rest of the banana and the peel in a plastic bag. "I can be a waitress or something."

"Yes, because everyone is just dying to have an underage waitress with no work experience." She puffs and looks out the window.

"You just don't get it, do you." And with that she seems done with the conversation. Nur slaps her arm a few times and she divers all her attention to the toddler.

"A gap year?" He turns to Gerry, who, to his benefit has been sitting in the front seat quietly.

"I want to defer."

"And do what?"

"I dunno. Travel I guess. I was thinking I could go volunteer in Africa."

Stop-light, thank god, for this he needs to turn around. "One, Africa is not a country; two the last thing any organization in any country in Africa needs is an unskilled American teenager. So, do better. What do you want to do?" Green light again, the horns from the sea of cars behind him alert him to the change.

"I could go to Asia?" He says, then throws Karen a dirty look as she chuckles.

"Again, not a country, Gerry."

"Why are you being so difficult about this? You took time off and joined the Navy!"

"Exactly! I had a plan. I had something that I was doing. I was learning skills and being a productive member of society. I was not drinking my way through South-East Asia and pouring drinks to drunks twice my age. I was learning something and growing as a person. You want to take time off school – that's fine. But you need to come up with a plan. Of how you'll fund it, what you'll do and how that will help you grow as a person. If you don't, I'm not paying for the two of you to squander your life." Silence. So thick you could cut it with a knife. They're both looking out of their respective windows. Nur is the only one still looking at him, smiling. He wonders how long before she's 15 and treating him like public enemy number one. They reach the house. Unload their bags in silence. Eat lunch in silence. He never knew the two of them together could be that quiet. He never knew the house could be this quiet. Even Nur seems to have given up on her, "Oh-ohs."

A slam of the door, a run up and down the stairs later, "Where's my laptopt?"

Karen and Gerry look up from their plates, half-amused, half-shocked, they've never seen her like this either.

"Zoey, we're having lunch, would you like to join us?"

"No. Where's my laptop?" She repeats, impatiently.

He wants to smack her and scream at her until she calms down, until the girl he knows re-appears, but instead, he takes a bite of his eggplant and calmly replies, "Stored. Away. You're grounded. And see, when you're grounded, the laptop and the iPad tend to be distractions, as they make the grounding rather pleasurable, and a little bit like a holiday. And since I didn't want you to enjoy this experience, they're safely stored away."

'You can't do that!" She seems like she might explode and blow the entire planet up with the sheer power of her frustration.

'But I can." He says with a small smile, his voice soft and sweet, too sweet, like saccharine. "See, I get it. I hurt you by leaving, and I understand that and I am sorry. But I am your dad, and I love you and I am not letting you turn into a spoiled brat, because you're hurt and because I feel guilty. So you're grounded. Until you decide you want to have an adult conversation about this and tell me how I can fix it."

"I have finals!"

"You have one final left. And it's AP English. So I don't know… try using books. Everything you need is in the study." She just stands there staring at him, arms crossed, leg drumming on the floor.

"I-" and for a moment he thinks she will say she hates him, but she doesn't, she just stares at him, and walks away, her shoulders slouched, her head cocked to the side. Suddenly she seems very small, and incredibly young. He feels like his chest is on fire, his pulse racing. He hated doing it, almost as much as she hates him for it.

"Wow," Gerry says as he bites into his chicken, "a little harsh, don't you think?"

"I don't as a matter of fact." He replies flatly. His phone rings. Liv. "I need to take this." He answers half-way up the stairs. He prepares himself – she'll bi upset, she'll tell him to give Zo her laptop back, she'll tell him to give her some space, he prepares himself. He inhales. He answers. "Hi."

A pause. "Hi." He smiles. Unconsciously. "I miss you." His heart feels like it might physically leap out of his chest. Suddenly it is as if all the weight has been lifted from his shoulders.

"Right back at yah." And god, what is wrong with him, he sounds like a member of a boy band, he internally chastises himself, and hits his head a few times on the bannister. He clears his throat, "Uh, I miss you too."

She chuckles. It warms him up. From the bottom of his belly to the tips of his toes it is as if the tide of calm rushes through him. "Have they driven you mad yet?"

"I. Hate. Teenagers." He says slowly, enunciating each word. He leans against the wall and runs his hand through his hair. "I just… when did it get so difficult? They were all so nice. They liked me, we were pals and now, Zo can't stand to be in the same room as me for longer than 40 seconds, Karen wants to drop out of Harvard and become a waitress and Ger thinks Africa is a country. It's like… they've all gone mad." He says it all in one breath.

"Fitz, calm down." Her voice feels like a summer breeze tickling his skin. "What happened. Zo said you took her laptop and grounded her and ruined her life?" He expects her to say something else, but she doesn't, she seems to be giving him a chance to explain.

"Liv, I know, OK, I know that we said I need to give her time and space and all of that, and I've tried. But for the past week since you've left, she's been impossible, and I just… I need to be her parent right now, and not her friend. I know I screwed up, but I can't make amends, until she's willing to let me. And the way she's been acting, well, she needs to know that's not OK, under any circumstance."

"OK."

"OK?" He wishes he didn't sound so startled.

"Well, you're her parent, you're parenting her. You've never screwed up so far, so I don't really see why I wouldn't trust you on this." And the ocean seems too vast suddenly, he needs her near, he needs to be able to kiss her, and hold her, and whisper in her ear how much he loves her, until she drifts off to sleep.

"I love you, you know that?"

"I do." She doesn't say it back. And there's an awkward pause they both wish wasn't there, the kind they never used to have. "What about Karen and Gerry?"

"I don't know… I just, it seems so sudden."

"Well, have you asked them why?"

He pauses. He feels hot, his face flushed suddenly. "No, I haven't, actually." He leans his head against the wood panels. "Maybe it's not that, maybe it's me Liv. Maybe I'm the one who doesn't know how to parent them. I mean I keep screwing up. First Karen tries to k-" he can't say it, he physically cannot utter it. He can hear her inhaling.

"Fitz, that wasn't your fault." This is not how they should be having this conversation. Not with 5 hours of time difference, an ocean between them, no, this is not how this should be happening. But then, she is talking to him, despite all odds, she is talking to him, despite being 5 hours and an ocean away, she still cares and she is still talking to him, so maybe, this is exactly how they should talk about it – in the darkness of the stairs, his eyes closed, silence, aside from her voice.

"She was depressed and I didn't notice. She was starving herself and I didn't notice. She was cutting and I didn't notice. She was… she tried to kill herself and I didn't even notice she was unwell. How is that not my fault? I just didn't notice, anything at all."

She is quiet for a moment. "That's why you left…"

"What?"

"Because you thought that if you're there, every second of every day, watching her, you'd notice."

"I just… I thought that if I could just watch her all the time, I could see it, I could spot the little things, before they became the big things."

"Oh, Fitz." He hears her shuffling. He can imagine her tucking her knees under legs, resting her arm on her stomach. "That's not how it works. She needs to learn to spot the little things before they become the big things and to work out the way to resolve them. She can't go through life with you micro-managing her. She needs to learn about herself and learn to heal herself and save herself."

"But what…" his voice trembles, it breaks, it echoes through his bones, "what if she can't?" He can feel a tear rolling down his cheek. Maybe this is precisely how they needed to have this conversation, "What if she can't do it?"

"She can. She's done it until now, and she's done it pretty well. She's alive, and she's healthy and she's arguing with Gerry and you, and driving Mellie crazy and dropping out of school and rebelling. She is living Fitz. She might not be doing it on your terms, or anyone else's, but she's doing it."

"You're a great mom." He wipes his cheek with his sleeve.

"Girls are easy." She pauses, inhales, "It's a boy."

'W-what?"

"It's a boy. I know we wanted to wait for it, him, to be born to know the sex, but the doctors here didn't know that, so they told me during the check up and now I know, and I wasn't going to tell you, so that you'd be surprised, but I'm freaking out and I just… you said I should tell you things and let you in, and I'm letting you in – I am freaking out Fiz." She inhales sharply, "I mean I don't know anything abut boys. What they like, what they do, they just break stuff and fart and Gerry's different, I mean he was already big when I met him, when they're small they just stuff things up their nose and I just… I've never raised a boy before." He can't help but chuckle. "This is not funny."

"I'm sorry." He bites his smiling lip, "It's a little bit funny. Livvie, you'll be great. And I'l be there every step of the way, and you know, being a boy myself and having raised one who turned out OK, aside from terrible geography knowledge, thank you crappy education system, by the way, I think we will manage."

"But I used to read all these girl power stories to Zo and Nur, and what will I do with a boy?"

"Well read him girl power stories, of course!"

"Fitz?" And it's Zo.

"Liv, I should go. Zo's calling me."

"Keep doing the parenting thing. They'll appreciate it in about 30 years." And she hangs up before he can say, "I love you."

"Yeah, Zo?" He says as he gets up. "Look, I know you're pissed, but you can't have your laptop back, just make-do with books and if you-

"I'm sorry." She says softly, as he reaches the top of the stairs.

'What?"

"I'm sorry. For acting the way I did. I should have let you explain."

"How much of this conversation did you overhear?"

"Not much?" She says with a small smile.

"So basically the whole thing?"

"Yeah, pretty much everything." She says with a small chuckle. "I was upset." She pauses and looks up at him, her eyes wide, her long eyelashes fluttering in the sunlight, "I… remember that email you sent me when you and mom just started dating and you missed my recital, because Karen fell off her horse?"

"Of course I do."

"Well, you said it was hospital over the recital and then you came back and said we were a family and you promised we'd be a family and then now… you just, you didn't let me help. Families help each other. And she's, she's kinda like my sister and you didn't let me help. You were pissed at mom and didn't let me help Karen."

"Oh, Zo," And he's pulling her in for a hug, "I didn't let you come while she was in the hospital, because she asked me not to. She was upset and felt terrible, because she felt she set a bad example. She made Gerry go back to school the morning after he came. She just didn't want anyone fussing over her. I'm sorry. I should have told you that. I should have… a lot of things. But I was just, lost, and scared and you know, sometimes we screw up. Your mom and I, without meaning to, or wanting to, we screw up."

"I know." She steps back, wiping her cheek with her sleeve, "Will you and mom be OK?" It breaks his heart how uncertain she sounds.

"We'll get there." He kisses the top of her head. "You're getting taller." She wiggles out of his embrace, ever the fifteen year-old. "Are we OK?"

"We'll get there." She says with a small smile. "Can I-"

"No. You're still grounded. The stuff you pulled for the past week is still unacceptable young lady."

"I don't appreciate that gendered address." She says with faux seriousness.

"Well, you can not appreciate it while you eat lunch."

They head down the stairs. "Is mom really having a boy."

"Yeah," he says with a grin.

"But what will we do with a boy? They fart. And break stuff."

"God, you are just like your mother. Except louder. One, they don't fart; two, they don't break stuff; three, stop with the gender stereotypes young lady!"

She grins, before running down the stairs, yelling, "Gerry, we're having a baby brother, which means you'll have to do all the potty training!"

"Dad! Seriously?!" He yells excitedly from the bottom of the stairs.

"Yeah."

"Karen, 50 bucks, on the table now!"

"You did not bet on this!" He tries to sound strict.

"Oh, come on dad, as if you did not just lose a 50 to Cy." Zo says with a small smile. She winks at him. She's calling him dad.

"Karen, Ger, a moment!" He calls out and leads them into the yard. "Here's a plan for the next year." They exchange looks, then look at him, questioning, "You will spend the summer with your mom. You will come to London in September. You will do internships. They will be unpaid and the hours will be long and you will not be doing your dream job – but you will learn hard work, and responsibility and they will be in your chosen fields. After 6 months, I will give you money to travel – 6 months worth of minimum wage pay checks. You can go wherever you please, provided it is reasonably safe, and you know enough about the country's history and culture not to make asses of yourselves. I will have the final say over your itineraries. If after that year, you decide to go back to school that is fine. If you decide you do not wish to do so, that is fine too. But you will be expected to figure out your own way. You will have had some work experience and some life experience, and that will help. So will your mom, Liv and I, but essentially, you will be expected to make a living." They are staring at him. Why are they staring at him? Why are they not blinking? "Are you going to speak, or…?"

"We get to go to London with you?!" They scream in unison.

"Wait, you wanted to come to London? But it's cloudy and rainy and stuffy, and you live in California?"

"God, you're so clueless dad!" She kisses him on the cheek quickly.

"Seriously, you're getting old." He says with a grin, a younger, but as-tall version of Fitz.

"You're welcome." He yells after them.

Zo pokes her head into the yard, "Feeling pretty good about yourself right now, huh?"

He grins, "Yeah, your dad just rocked some hard-core parenting," he says as he attempts to moonwalk and ends up hitting a rose bush.

"Yeah. Good luck explaining to our moms that you just hard-core-parented without consulting them." She grins and disappears inside. He can feel cold sweat on the back of his neck.

He is walking to her apartment, a bottle of ginger-ale in a shaky hand. As he's climbing up the stairs. it's a race. He's at her door, knocking, his heart thumping in his chest as he hears the approaching steps.

"Hi."

She looks at him stunned. "Hi."

They just look into each other's eyes and time stands still for a moment of eternity. The way her eyelashes flutter as she blinks, the way she cocks her head to the side as she smiles, the way she runs her teeth over her bottom lip.

"Won't you invite me in?"

"What are you doing here?" She asks as she steps to the side.

He takes his coat off, and slips his shoes off – it instantly feels like home. "Well," he hands her the ginger ale, "My wife sounded upset on the phone today."

"Fitz!" She looks at him incredulously. "You cannot just fly over the Atlantic, because I was having a meltdown."

"What better reason is there to fly over the Atlantic than that?" He puts his hands on her hips, pulling her close to him. "I mean Liv, what is it all worth – the jobs, and the money and all of it, if I can't just fly here when you need me and hold you for a bit?"

"What about the kids?" She runs her hands down his back.

"They're watching Nur and Cy's watching them. They can manage without me for a couple of days."

"What about packing and moving and all the stuff?"

"Most of the stuff is already in storage. There's only books and clothes left, and we can handle that in a couple of days."

"What about-"

"Liv, I love you, but stop over-thinking this. I am here, because you needed me. Let me be here. Let yourself need me. The world is not going to burn to the ground because you let me in. The kids will be fine, and Cy will be fine and the house will be fine. The stock market will be fine, there will be no wrath of gods and angels will not fall. I am here, letting you need me, and the world has not spun off its axis."

"OK."

"OK?"

"Yeah, I'd quite like a kiss though. It's been a while." She smiles."And... I love you too."

"Oh god, you have no idea." He takes her face in his hands. He runs his thumb along her cheekbones, down to her lips. She smiles as he touches her nose with his. He kisses her slowly, tenderly, letting himself feel every crease of her lips, all their softness, all their gentleness. She chuckles. She puts his hand on her stomach, her forehead leaning on his cheek.

"He's kicking."