Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

Green Dreams

Chapter Seven: Fighting Under the Radar

Tuesday's dinner consisted of unapproachable meat and some dark pink unidentifiable sauce slathered over it. Cloud picked at the recognizable mashed potatoes on the side. Dan sat across from him and dug straight into his food, either uncaring or ignorant to the potential chemicals and bacteria he was ingesting. Though a messy eater, Dan was nothing compared to Barret, and Cloud effectively ignored it.

The days were going by more quickly. Cloud, who never got much sleep anyway, had found himself dozing in class as he listened to litanies of information he already knew or knew was perfectly useless. Dan had firmly attached himself to the blond now, trailing after him to class and partnering with him in training. Dan really wanted to be friends, if his effort was anything to go by, and Cloud hadn't really minded. It was nice to have some company now and then, and Dan had quickly learned not to bother filling in the silence with pointless words.

Zack's promise of a Wutain dinner had yet to come, but Cloud knew that Zack's workday was hectic, and he assumed the black-haired man had simply forgotten. It felt arrogant to ask about it, so Cloud let it go. The SOLDIER had more important duties to worry about than trivial dinners he promised to a cadet. The disappointment stung, but Cloud was sure Zack hadn't meant it.

The workouts in the mornings were still going on, and a couple of boys in his bunker had begun to notice, and he'd heard some rumors floating around. Cloud didn't care if they knew or not. Their concerns were nothing to him; he had far bigger things to worry about. No said anything to him, not even Dan, but their incredulous expressions spoke for themselves. Cloud was secretly a little upset with his progress, though it had only been days. His muscles cramped, he was always sore, and the strength and endurance he'd long cultivated were gone. He was…frail, and he loathed the feeling of his own weakness. He pushed himself harder and harder to deny the anger inside at it, even as he knew he was risking himself for injury. The mako and Hojo's tinkering had made him feel invincible sometimes, and without it things would be much harder.

The sound of a clattering tray and a voice turned Cloud's head away from his despondent staring at the soggy potatoes. Reno had practically thrown himself on to the seat after he slid his tray down the table towards Cloud. He only did it for the attention, Cloud knew.

The redhead ate his food with relish, continually moving the utensil to his mouth. He really reminded everyone of a greedy street child when he ate like that, like his next meal wasn't guaranteed.

Dan seemed to freeze at Reno's presence, unsure why he was joining them so suddenly. After all, most people probably thought Cloud was the only person who had enough patience to sit through Dan's one-sided conversations. Reno was an entirely different story, though. The redhead had friends, groups he hung out with. Already people were beginning to pick up on the different vibe, and Cloud could feel them staring at the motley group at his table. It was unpleasant, but not unwarranted. He was as confused about Reno's choice of seating as everyone else, but he didn't say anything. He could deal with whatever the redhead came up with. Reno was still just a kid after all without any Turk training to deal with and no dirt on Cloud.

The blond shrugged it away even as Dan was staring pointedly at Reno. Politics of the cadet world in Shinra were hardly his concern, and Reno could do as he pleased so long as he wasn't poking around Cloud too much.

"Is that salt?" Reno looked away from his food and pointed to the cheap, clear, plastic shaker at the end of the metal table. Dan's gaze didn't leave the redhead for a moment, if anything he only bristled when Reno spoke, but Cloud looked away from the two of them in surprise. At the end of the table was a pitiful shaker of salt. Since when did Shinra have condiments in the cafeteria?

"Hmmm… Maybe they'll have ketchup someday." Reno's face lit up in a wistful grin, obviously thrilled with the idea. He turned then to Cloud and Dan, "So, what are you guys gonna do Friday?" Reno's sidelong glance didn't get past Cloud's notice, but the blond ignored it. The redhead was probably gauging his reactions, trying to get a better feel of him. It was better than Dan's direct approach, but far more annoying.

The Friday coming up was Memorial Day, and even the Shinra army got off. All the Wutai War veterans were honored in a big parade on the plate, followed by the procession of families of those who lost loved-ones in the war. Many SOLDIERs walked for their comrades too. Business flourished as people came into Midgar to see the parade. Despite the day being choked by Shinra propaganda, the entertainment was well worth the trip. That, and General Sephiroth marched in the parade himself.

Cloud had gone when he'd been a cadet before. It had been a spectacular event from what little he recalled, no one could deny Shinra that, but it was been exclusively for the people above the plate. Those who lived under the plate could come, though most couldn't afford the train ticket.

Cloud remembered little of the actual event. Most of it was military salutes and sobbing families. The moment that stuck out in his mind was when General Sephiroth marched out in front. Dressed in pristine white, adorned with sparkling metals and bright ribbons announcing his prestigious rank and awards, he had strode at the front of the marching line of First Class SOLDIERs, all glittering with their own metals. It had been amazing. That had been the first time Cloud could recall seeing Sephiroth in person, with his regal bearing as he headed the best SOLDIERs in the world; Cloud's heartbeat had been loud enough to drown out the band.

The blond turned to Reno as the redhead watched him with curious eyes. "Nothing." The parade was the same every year, and Cloud wanted to take as much advantage as he could of a day free from the hassles of the other boys. This Friday he could avoid most of the other cadets, who would undoubtedly go to the parade to see the SOLDIERs and the General. Nearly everyone on the Shinra compound would be marching or watching, and no one would notice if Cloud wasn't in the crowd. The blond had planned to claim an empty room that day and hopefully get his hands on a proper sword. The lock on the weapon cabinet would be laughably easy after what Yuffie had taught him.

Reno shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm plannin' on going under. Gotta pick up some stuff." He rattled off a list of various necessities, mostly food, though he mentioned a new switchblade and some bullets (which made Dan twitch). Reno waved his fork around as he spoke, his red hair flopping around in its ponytail the way a rat's tail whips around behind it. It was a brighter red than Cloud remembered, but not nearly as long.

Dan turned back to his food with a scoff, rudely ignoring Reno, who in turn ignored him. Cloud was only half-listening to either of them. He had more important things on his mind—most notably the near future. Tonight would be his first lesson with Zack. He had been terribly anxious since Zack found him in the weight-room lifting last Saturday. He had been bench-pressing when Zack barged in, and only Cloud's quick reflexes saved him from dropping the barbell on his chest. Cloud's moment of surprise, all wide-eyed and clutching the barbell with white hands, had Zack cracking up. Cloud's self-consciousness won out, and his cheeks had tinged pink with embarrassment. He hated to be caught unprepared.

The SOLDIER had told him the only times he was given to train Cloud were Tuesday and Thursday nights, but if he had free time he promised to find Cloud. Even if it was only two days a week, it meant a couple of hours of Zack to himself.

Zack was an excellent teacher and mentor and had probably gotten some of his tricks of being a disciplinarian from Sephiroth. He could be relentless and mulishly stubborn, which made him difficult to work with at times. However, he imparted lessons that went above and beyond just swordplay, and it meant the world to Cloud.

It also terrified him.

Zack usually came off to people as laid-back and fun, but not always quick on the uptake. It was an impression he'd told Cloud he loved because people came to underestimate his powers of observation. Cloud, however, knew Zack was anything but stupid. The man proved to be quite clever and often picked up on subtleties people rarely noticed.

Especially after the group sword lessons and the disastrous materia class, Cloud was mortifyingly aware that his previous skills were quite apparent to anyone who really thought about it. The blond knew without a doubt Zack would pick up on it fast. Cloud knew he couldn't fool Sephiroth, and if worked too hard to hold back any abilities, resisted his reflexes or fought too cautiously, he'd be all over Zack's radar, who would immediately see through it. Then he'd probably be poked and prodded and pulled until Cloud dropped some enormous clue.

Zack had probably already heard about the materia incident, and with a couple more tip-offs he could easily assemble a story to fit Cloud's 'prodigal' abilities. Of course, the SOLDIER would want a full confession out of Cloud, along with some good reasons for hiding it, and then potentially evidence. All of which Cloud had none of.

Where Zack could be clever at getting people to open up, Sephiroth excelled when it came to prying out the words. During the Wutai War he'd been famous for a lot of things, but one of them was his quick and civil interrogations; he hadn't needed brutality or tricks to get people to spill secrets. A couple of comments about Cloud's surprising ability, and the blond would have a seat with the General.

Therefore, Cloud's excitement for the lesson had been mixed with the most horrible feelings of doubt.

Cloud glanced up at the digital clock at the front of the cafeteria. He still had some time before the lesson started. He had to get his water bottle from his room before he headed to the gym. Zack would probably be waiting for him, already warmed up and ready to go.

Despite eating barely any food Cloud's stomach was in upheaval from the nerves. The blond stood up and dumped the remainder of his dinner in the trash. Dan looked up at him surprised, but Reno looked almost as if he had been waiting for it. Cloud nodded to both of them before walking out the swinging doors. Reno followed him out the door and called out to him in the hall.

"Hey wait Cloud! I was wonderin' something." Cloud turned around to look at Reno. The redhead caught up and kept in stride with him as he talked. "I'm goin' under the plate Friday, do you want to come? I know some great places to get some good stuff." Reno was smiling again, and it was both knowing and devious. Cadets were still in training, and therefore weren't allowed to have their own weapons while on Shinra grounds. Unsurprisingly Reno knew where to get one.

It would have to be cheap. Cadets had to pay to be trained, and the only allowance Cloud got was from his mother on his birthday. At the moment he was dirt poor and couldn't make real money unless he joined the regulation army—like he'd ever stoop to that level again—or became a SOLDIER. Still, what money he had amassed was enough to get a good knife off the black market.

What Reno's offer didn't entail, but tempted Cloud so much more, was the thought of Aeris. She still lived in the Sector 5 slums at this time, and if anyone might understand his predicament, it would be her. Cloud wanted to see her again. He wanted to apologize once and for all too, for letting her down so long ago. Then just do his best to avoid another mistake.

"Sure. Let's take the earliest train though." Reno frowned at that. He was hoping to at least get the chance to watch some of the parade. He had lived in the slums after all, and hadn't gone up before to see it. Despite that, he was pleased Cloud was coming with him. It was a chance at having Cloud all to himself; in an environment he knew Cloud would rely on him to get around in.

Cloud proved himself right when he entered the gym. Zack was swinging around a basic broadsword, muscles already warm, and his eyes glimmering excitedly. He was like a little kid sometimes, and it made it easy for a couple moments to forget that he had fought in the war on the frontlines and earned that First Class SOLDIER rank.

"Just start stretching and warming-up. I don't want you pulling anything, and you should always do that before practice or heading into a fight—if you get the chance."

Cloud turned away to put down his water bottle and begin basic stretches while Zack talked. When he was ready, Zack handed him a sword—a proper one this time, not a wooden one. Cloud swung it around a couple times, already appreciating the sound of metal through air.

"Feels good, huh?" Zack asked, and Cloud just nodded, but his lips quirked in a small smile.

"Okay, Let's do this right this time. Just relax and imagine I'm some hideous giant monster who knows how to use a sword." Zack's teasing grin didn't get the blush he was looking for. Cloud shrugged instead, but looked away uncomfortably. He was still a little embarrassed by his reaction last week both with the General and when Zack singled him out. He was determined this lesson wouldn't be like the swordplay class, but that sentiment didn't settle his nerves at all.

The SOLDIER didn't wait another beat before lifting up his own weapon and taking up a basic ready stance: legs evenly apart, knees slightly bent, and sword held out with two hands in front of him. The muscles in his shoulders were corded with strength, and the dull blade looked lethal in his hands. Cloud immediately took his own defensive stance, except his sword only required a one-handed grip. Years of habit with the Buster Sword made Cloud almost reach out to put his other hand on the hilt, before thinking better of it. Double-handed blades tended to be longer and heavier, and were therefore more difficult to wield. Cadets weren't taught how to handle those until they joined SOLDIER and specialized.

Zack smirked in response to Cloud's guard, and nodded his head to show Cloud was standing properly. They moved in a tight circle first, Zack watching his footing and balance. Then he made some slow hits on Cloud, careful to watch the movements of the blond, especially his wrists and shoulders.

Cloud tried to ignore the tedium of the simple maneuvers and focused on making mistakes. The exaggerated parrying and thrusting was pretty simple on the upper body, so Cloud concentrated on his footwork and his wrist angle. Even those moves, the ones he had memorized after years and years of hard training, cadet Cloud would still be a little shaky on. He purposefully crossed his legs unnecessarily, twisted his wrist unnaturally to make a block, and even made glances down at his feet to double-check himself. He felt a little ridiculous, but Zack lightly chastised him and corrected him every time, and it seemed to be doing the trick.

Zack just smiled as Cloud stumbled a step when he deliberately shifted his weight wrong, and it made Cloud wary. Zack's face didn't reveal any suspicions, but Cloud was cautious nonetheless. Soon the slow pace became maddening for them both, and Zack sped up the moves slightly.

"If you want me to go faster Cloud, then all you gotta do is ask." Zack's wolfish grin, and the innuendo behind his words stained Cloud's cheeks a darker red than they already were.

This time, Zack came at Cloud a little faster and a little harder, forcing Cloud to respond in kind. It was still far from the normal speed of a swordfight, but more interesting and far more difficult for Cloud. It was harder to concentrate on mistakes when he was moving faster, and he was reacting automatically. He focused instead on keeping an open expression of tiredness or surprise, and making sure to miss the block on occasion. It was exhausting work, and he knew his footwork was clumsy for it, luckily.

"C'mon Cloud, I know you can keep up."

He could feel the weakness in his limbs and knew his endurance was reaching its limit. Keeping up this pace for an extended amount of time just wasn't possible at the moment, though Cloud frowned and promised himself to keep it up until Zack called it off. He needed to know his real limits, and more importantly to eventually break them.

Their fight continued to escalate. Zack didn't do anything fancy, but his unending stream of attacks and heavy hits caused Cloud to falter for real a couple of times. He was embarrassed by it, but he was more concerned with how quick his reaction time was. His survival instincts ingrained in him demanded that he keep moving, that he keep going, that he overcome.

Losing had become unfamiliar territory after years of being—literally—the strongest person alive, and everything in him repulsed against losing, even in a spar. He had the world depending on him. He had people's dreams, hopes, and their very lives relying on him. He couldn't lose.

But Cloud had to tell himself this didn't count, that this wasn't important, and moreover, he couldn't win. One, because this was Zack, and Zack was a First Class SOLDIER and Cloud was a cadet, and two, because Cloud just didn't have it in him. Yet.

Cloud grimaced as he felt himself wearing down as the fight continued. What frustrated Cloud even more than his lack of stamina was his own body's failure to follow his commands. Even as Zack moved, Cloud eyes saw the motions and predicted the action to intercept the blade. His arms couldn't seem to get there fast enough though, and his body was unable to duck and evade when necessary. The fight progressed until a rather hard clash of the blades had Cloud stumbling backwards to his knees, and Zack flicking the tip of his blade to Cloud's neck. The SOLDIER's smile was genuine, but there was something else too.

"Nice work, Cloud. You've surprised me." Cloud panted even as he schooled his face into a neutral expression as soon as the words registered. He couldn't make any assumptions about what Zack meant. He could just mean it as a compliment.

Contrary to what Cloud thought though, Zack didn't quite mean it that way. Cloud was certainly hiding something, his face was stiffer than natural, and he hadn't responded to the pseudo-compliment. The blond had been an excellent student; fixing every mistake he made almost immediately, without needed demonstrations, a push or two, or repeated emphasis. He made the same mistakes only a handful of times, whereas most beginners made them repeatedly before it was trained out of them, especially as they got stressed and distracted. Along with that, he rarely made multiple mistakes at the same time. All of this was very suspicious for someone who should have almost no experience with a sword.

Which implied Cloud had previous knowledge and a good feel for sword fighting.

What made the least sense were his impeccable technique and his lack of physical ability to back it up. Cloud's stamina gave out quickly. They had been hardly going for fifteen minutes when it was clear he was tiring. He'd stuck with it stubbornly, which Zack liked, but it was still strange, to say the least, and terribly fishy.

The crease in Zack's brow, though subtle, was still noticeable to Cloud, who was familiar with many of the First's quirks. Zack was confused, and it made Cloud unaccountably nervous.

The blond dusted himself off, more for the sake of something to do than anything else, and stood up. Zack nodded his head at the closet, indicating today's brief session was over now that he had a feel for where Cloud was ability speaking. The blond could feel Zack's eyes on his back as he took his sword over to the closet. When Cloud turned back to Zack after putting away his sword, the SOLDIER was smiling. At first glance it was perfectly genuine, but Cloud was sure he reading something indulgent in it too. Zack knew something was up and he'd let him get away today, but the blond might not be so lucky another time.

Cloud pushed aside what that meant and gave Zack his own half smile and a quiet thanks. He already knew he'd be up all night thinking of now to improve his bad fighting form. Even though Zack knew something was up, Cloud wasn't ready to tell him anything. The terror of telling Zack the truth was overwhelming. The abandonment, betrayal, the fear, all of those emotions was something Cloud didn't think he'd ever want to see on Zack's face. No one wanted to know about their own death with circumstances like that, and Cloud certainly didn't want to repeat those horrid events. They were best kept in his own faulty memory and left there.

Zack spoke up, and the blond was sure if he'd been sixteen properly he'd never have caught the subtle strain of suspicion behind his cheerful voice. "Make sure you stretch so you don't cramp your muscles. Endurance is something that'll come with time though, so don't sweat it Spike. I've got a pretty good idea of what we can start working on next time."

They left the room after they collected their things, Cloud letting the older man lead him through the halls. The blond couldn't deny the smidgen of guilt inside him as Zack looped an arm around Cloud's shoulders. It was as bad as lying, all the faking and hiding. Saying it was out of necessity didn't make Cloud feel any better.

Still, he bit his tongue and didn't say a word, though Cloud expected Zack was gearing up for a "you-can-talk-to-me-about-anything" chat. The blond knew he wouldn't be taking Zack up on his offer, and that he couldn't let his guilty feelings have any say. Some things just had to be done, and sometimes they required a certain level of apathy. Sephiroth had taught him that.

Cloud's bunker came into view and the pair stopped right in front of Cloud's door. "Thursday at the same time, don't forget Spike." Zack's smile was more genuine this time. He ruffled Cloud's hair. "You know Cloud, you can talk to me about anything." He paused for a half second, waiting for the blond to say something, but Cloud just nodded and averted his eyes, focusing on the ground. The SOLDIER seemed to be thinking for a moment, before he pulled Cloud into a one-armed hug, stepped away, and walked back down the hall.

The barrack was silent, only broken by the murmurs and breathing of the sleepers. Dan slept stiffly, almost reminiscent of Vincent's guarded sleep, though Dan's was far deeper and more at ease. No nightmares haunted him. Reno, in turn, was sprawled out ungracefully, one leg and some of that wild red hair loosely falling off the side. The blankets were bunched around him and held close, like someone might take them in his sleep.

Cloud moved from the doorway, barely consciously aware of what he was doing. His body was shutting down on him, his right arm he could barely feel, and his brain was becoming foggier with sleep. He stripped quickly and tossed the sweaty clothes under his bed.

The welcoming pillow and blanket couldn't be denied, and Cloud flopped down and slid under the sheets quickly. He curled up to try and keep the warmth from Zack's hug from seeping away, and almost immediately fell asleep.