Sebastian tries his best to help Hawke heal, with help from villagers and het his far nameless boy. He had asked the boy his name the morning after their arrival, but the boy replied that had he ever been given one by his parents, it was long lost and forgotten. His master had never deigned to give him a name, because he claimed it would only bring a sense of entitlement and belonging.
But what ails her is far more than malnourishment and a common cold, and it's her heart that fares the worst.
She's not been awake for two weeks and she talks in her sleep, muttering two names; Fenris and Leto. Sebastian and the boy barely knows who Fenris is, but Leto is a mystery to them both and they hope it's not someone else Hawke's lost.
She wakes up at last after almost three long, painful weeks, Sebastian almost interrupting the evening service to go see to her, even knowing she's safe in the hands of the healer. As soon as he's done he wills himself not to run to her side, still caring too much about appearances as taught to him by his family all those years ago. Only it's for her sake, not his own that he keeps his pace as close to his regular as he can.
The boy is there, of course, having been unwilling to leave her side ever since she saved his life. The healer hadn't mind, to Sebastian's surprise, but had instead enjoyed having an elven child around. She'd even vowed to teach him about herbs if he wanted to, and he'd been ecstatic at the suggestion, finally allowed to learn something, finally given a choice in something.
When Sebastian arrives, Hawke is seated in front of the fire, cocooned in blankets, a cup of something warm in her hands. She looks like shit, Sebastian thinks, but doesn't say anything.
There are dark rings around her eyes, her cheeks hollow and her skin looks like wax. Hard to say she's alive even, her eyes so dark and lacking any hint of life. But she's breathing, politely listening to the boy talking animatedly about Sebastian, about what he's learnt since arriving, that he's never left her side and that he helped the healer gather herbs for potions and food.
Sebastian talks quietly to the healer outside her hut while the boy continues his ramblings inside. No, there's nothing new, except that she woke up and managed to eat some food on her own, and she's not spoken anything while she was in deep sleep that she' not already said.
He thanks her again, and then heads back inside to talk to this mysterious Serah Hawke and gather some answers.
-
Her name, it turns out, is Marian. Until not that long ago she was a citizen of Kirkwall, after having fled Lothering during the Blight. She had been Champion of Kirkwall, then Vicountess for a short time, before she fled the city with her elven lover in order to protect it.
"So Fenris is the father of your child then?" Sebastian asks, seeing pain flare in her eyes before all emotions become dulled again.
"Yes," Marian answers, her voice barely a whisper.
"And who is Leto? You've been saying both names while you were… asleep."
"They're the same." The pain returns to her eyes, but she continues talking. "He was a slave to a magister, who named him Fenris; his little wolf. His mother named him Leto, and I was getting better at calling him by his original name, as even after we killed his former master, he still couldn't quite believe he was free. He used to hate magic, you know? He suffered at the hands of magic, had lyrium branded into his skin and all memories of his past life stolen. And then he found he had a sister, and she told him his name was Leto and that he had undergone all that pain in order to free her and their mother from slavery.
"And despite all the pain magic had brought him, he still fell in love with me and trusted me. He used to claim 'what has magic touched that it hasn't spoilt?' and then he stopped. He trusted me, a mage, loved me enough to say 'I'm yours'."
She paused, coughing, her throat raw from speaking so little the past three months. Sebastian hands her a pitcher of water, and she drinks straight from it, almost all at once.
"I'm sure you heard the Chantry was blown to bits by a mage? I decided to take Fenris and leave in case the Divine would send out a new Exalted March. For the city, and for us. Being a Vicountess was one thing, but a mage at that? With a former slave at my side? Not that what we chose instead was any less dangerous, but at least we didn't put our friends and family in danger. I guess it was peaceful, in a way, the two of us alone out there. Sounds ironic, I know, calling hunting slavers peaceful, but after surviving the Blight, surviving Kirkwall and all the losses we both experienced before, during and after, it kind of was."
"You don't have to keep talking, you know. Not if it's too hard for you," Sebastian tells her, and it seems it's only then that Marian discovers the tears running down her cheeks.
"Thank you."
They sit in silence; the only sounds that of the young boy sleeping and the crackling of the fire. The healer has gone to the Gull for a meal and won't be back for a while yet, but Sebastian finds he doesn't mind the silence.
"So, you don't sound like you're from around here. Care to tell me?" Sebastian simply smiles at her, then launches into a tale of his childhood in Starkhaven.
-
Sebastian returns the next day, and shares stories with Marian and the boy while the healer gets some well-deserved rest and a hearty meal.
And so the days pass into weeks, stories and tales they've experienced and heard, as Marian grows healthier and the hollows in her cheeks fill out. Her hair is still a shapeless short mess after they cut it; Sebastian had thought it a shame to cut hair that had been grown out so long, but it was a tangle with caked blood and dirt, no use in trying to wash it, the healer said and cut away so much that Marian appeared a totally different person.
-
Then she goes into labour, the first day the spring comes carrying warmth.
Sebastian's never witnessed many births in his life, but this is the longest. He's permitted to stay at Marian's side for support; the bones of his hand feels like it's almost crushed to dust by her grip.
The boy, now having chosen the name Dareth, helps the healer with water and herbs and cloths, running frantically to and fro, excited and nervous at the same time.
It's a long progress, Sebastian spending the time quoting the Maker's words to Marian after having found she's Andrastian. He's learnt not to take it for granted that the persons showing up in the Chantry are religious of any kind, no matter their race.
Just at it feels as though Marian's screams will never end, a new voice joins hers.
"It's a girl," he healer says, sounding exhausted herself and happy the ordeal is over. She cuts he cord, wraps the babe in a blanket and goes to hand it to Marian to see and hold.
Only Marian's grown still, quiet, looking at the baby with the pointed ears and hints of dark hair and there is no emotion in her eyes. She looks only exhausted, not happy or ecstatic as one expects mothers to be when presented with their child safe and sound.
"Marian? Are you alright?" Sebastian can feel his own voice thick with worry, not knowing what to think of the scene in front of him. "Don't you want to hold your daughter?"
She looks at him, and the emptiness on her face and in her eyes terrifies Sebastian to the core, though he knows not why.
The crying pierces the air, and the healer looks at Sebastian with hard determination in her eyes.
"Go to the Gull, there should be a young woman there, elven, arrived only three nights ago for the purpose of feeding this one. Tell her I sent you, and then take Dareth back to the Chantry with you."
Sebastian does as she asks, daring nothing else.
"Dareth, you heard the lady. Serah Hawke needs rest, and so do you after all that running to and fro."
"But…"
"No but, child. Best not to go against the healer's wish."
"Can I come back tomorrow?"
"We'll see what she says, Dareth. We'll see."