Thank you guys so much for your outpouring of support!!!! It is really amazing!!! I can't believe the response i got from just two little paragraphs!!! WOW!!! Thank you's go out to: CaskettLover for adding me in their story alerts, author alerts, favorite authors, and favorite stories. Koezh for adding me in their story alerts and reviewing, i'm glad it'sa great start, I'm very happy your love it!! Jisbon-Sessed for putting me in their story alerts, favorite stories, and reviewing. I'm glad that your loving it already, and thank you for thinking I did great writing in this!! VictorShallBeMine for putting me on story alert. Theresa366 for putting me in story alert and also reviewing, thanks for thinking it's a great beginning and I plan to keep going!! TheMenatlistRules for adding me in their favorite stories and for reviewing, thanks for thinking it was a great start!! Country2776 for adding me in favorite stories. Redneckdetectiv for adding me in their story alerts. Vesiher for reviewing anonymously and thank you so much for thinking it is interesting!! AureliaMarie for putting me in their story alerts. MissNitaGirl for putting me on their story alerts, and for her review, thank you for thinking it's an interesting story!! I hope I don't disappoint you guys, your the best!! Also a special thank you goes out to TheMentalistRules and Koezh for taking their time and writng me throughout the day, and giving me words of encouragement. This chapter is dedicated to you two, so I really hope you like it!! Okay, the first part of the story is the explanation of what happens. Now where gonna get all into everything. I hope that makes sense!! LOL Any way here's chapter 1... By the way if all of you were in front of me right now I would give you all big hugs!!!! So I send you all BIG HUGS!!!!!! Thanks again soooooo much!!!!!!

It all seemed to start rather simply, a case , but not just any case a Red John case...

All seemed to be going well at work that day, they got a case rather early in the morning but solved it rather quickly. They had gone out to have closed cased ice cream. It was rather hot out today, 95 and the heat index 112. The guys were wearing t-shirts,Teresa and Grace were wearing tank tops, and Patrick had shed his jacket, vest, rolled up his sleeves past his elbows, and had a couple of buttons undone. Which made Teresa blush, she tried to look away but couldn't help herself. They had become closer lately, actual friends. He had even promised to behave a little more, he was worried she might get fired, then who would he have to argue with?? He told her this while pouting like a little boy, which earned him a smack up side his head, and she gave him a slight smile. Yes all was good.

Everyone was laughing and joking around in the bullpen, as Teresa came out of her office. "Hey guys listen up, we got a case. It's Red John." Everyone seemed to go quiet. Patrick's smile vanished in seconds. "Lets go." As everyone piled into the van. She was watching him. "You don't have to to this if you don't want to." "I know, but I want to help you." He gently squeezed her shoulder while saying it. They drove in silence. It was always hard for her to see him like this. They had become almost inseparable lately. They opened up more to each other. Learning more about each other as they went on. As they pulled up into the drive her heart sank, she knew what was awaiting them before she even got out, they all did.

As they piled out of their van, they all went their separate ways. Cho with Grace to ask questions, Rigsby went up stairs to investigate, and Teresa and Patrick down stairs, him asking questions and her watching and listening, and then asking ones of her own.

They had started up the stairs when they were meant by a very pale looking Rigsby. He gave Teresa a look that told her what it was like in that room. It made her heart pound, and she knew she didn't want Patrick in that room, to see what was inside, she also knew he wouldn't listen. "Uh, how about you go ask some more questions from the neighbors, and I'll go in here." "Why don't you want me to help you today?" "I'll listen, I promise, I told you I would behave myself, I meant it Teresa." "I know Patrick it's just that." "Before she could even finish her sentence she watched him walk around, and then watched as they both found the bodies. She thought she was going to be sick.

The woman looked just like his wife, and the little girl looked just like his daughter. She turned to look at him. What she saw ripped her heart out. She could see he was trying to hold the tears back. He was very pale now, and shaking slightly, as she was about to put her hand on his shoulder to offer him some comfort she knew he desperately needed, he flew out of the room. She took off chasing him. He managed to just make it outside before getting sick, and then took off through the woods. She chased after him, but was a little behind. She suddenly realized how fast this man could run. After a while he collapsed on his hands and knees. She watched in horror, she wanted to go to him, but wasn't sure she should. She could hear him weeping and saw him shaking, and pounding the ground beneath him, she could see the blood on his hands, and remembered how he was there for her when she had had a horrible day, it was her mother's birthday. She fault back crying all day. When everyone had left and she thought he was asleep, she went into her office and put her head on her arms on her desk, placed her head down on them and wept, she was so hurt and needed to just get it out. She never heard him come in, or even knew when he knelt down next to her. She slightly jumped when she felt his hand rubbing gently up and down her back, she turned to look at him, all he said was "come here" and she did. She cried all night in his arms, while he held her tightly running his left hand up and down her back while running his right hand gently through her hair. She thought back, it was only six months ago.

She watched him, and couldn't take it any more. She ran to him and knelt down beside him. How he looked at her shattered her heart. She took him in her arms and held him tightly to her. Her left hand rubbing slowly and soothingly up and down his back, while her right hand ran through his hair, it was so soft. He snuggled to her instantly, it was almost like he had hoped that she would follow him out there. "We have to go back, I want to catch him Teresa." He said while crying. "It's okay Patrick, you don't have to go back, no one is going to judge you, were all your friends here, we all understand." "Thank you." He said.

As she helped him up, they walked up to the house to find the coroners removing the bodies. Cho came up to him and gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze of comfort. His silent way of letting him know what had happened and that it was okay. They piled back in the van, him in the front with her, Cho in the back, and Grace and Rigsby in the middle. As they drove in silence Grace slipped her hand around the seat and gently squeezed his shoulder, he covered her hand with his and patted it, before she pulled slowly away. Then Rigsby leaned over and also squeezed his shoulder then patted it. He offered Patrick a small smile, and he smiled back. Teresa watched as they did this, it warmed her heart. Patrick was truly touched by all of the kindness, it let him know that he did have a family he could rely on no matter what. Teresa then placed her hand on his knee and lightly squeezed it, he placed his hand on hers and held onto it.

They finally reached the CBI Headquarters, all filed out and went in leaving Patrick and Teresa alone holding hands as they walked up the parking lot to the office, then letting go as they entered the bullpen. "Well guys it's been a long day and night, go home get some sleep and we'll get more information in the morning, good work everybody." "Okay boss, goodnight, goodnight boss, goodnight Rigsby goodnight Grace, goodnight boss, goodnight Cho." Patrick was just setting on his couch. "Goodnight guys, see you tomorrow." "Good night Patrick, goodnight man, night man." "Hey, what are you doing?" She looked at his hands, now bruised and somewhat swollen. "Uh, oh just thinking, goodnight Teresa, go home and get some rest." "Um, I rather stay here, I got some paperwork to catch up on." "No, it can wait till tomorrow, go home go to sleep, I'll be fine Teresa, I know that's the real reason you want to stay, I'm fine, really." She watched as he laid down and curled up. She also hoped that if he got upset he would call her. "Goodnight Teresa." "Goodnight Patrick."

Teresa got home, and fell in the door, she was so exhausted, it was after midnight. She emptied out her pockets, only taking her cell phone with her in case he would call. She dragged herself upstairs, kicked her shoes off, stripped and headed for a hot shower waiting for her aching muscles. The hot water did her wonders, she was relaxed, a but still worried about Patrick. When she finished she dried herself off and put on a comfy pair of gray sweatpants that were three sizes to big for her, and a light pink camisole top. She combed her hair out and blew dry her bangs, she knew how unruly they would be if she didn't. As she finished she brushed her teeth, put a pair of comfy thick gray socks and went to bed. She was in bed for only two hours when she heard knocking on her door. It was about three in the morning. She quickly got up and ran to the door. She already knew who it was. When she opened the door her heart broke at the sight before her. "Hi, I, uh , I'm sorry, I just wanted to talk, I know it's late, I'll leave." "Patrick please, come in." She eased him in, shut the door and locked it up and st the alarm. When she turned she saw his face, she could tell he had been crying, that he was crying, but trying to hide it, trying his best to be strong. As soon as she touched his shoulder he lost it, everything he had held in for so long came out in one second. She held him as he collapsed to the floor, crying and screaming their names. He burried his head in her chest and wrapped both arms around her tightly. She had her left arm wrapped around him and her right arm wrapped around him but also tenderly stroking his hair, she placed her cheek against the side of his head, and rocked him slowly. She knew she would have to do something drastic to help him but didn't know how to begin.

"I miss them so much!!" He was weeping, shaking violently in her arms. "I know." "It was all my fault, why couldn't I just shut up and they would be here with me!!" "Patrick you had know way of knowing what would happen when you said that, otherwise you would have never said it, you know that, they know that." "I killed them!!" "No you didn't Patrick, you didn't!!" "I want him dead Teresa, dead, he doesn't deserve to live, he doesn't!!" "I know, I promise when the time comes I'll take care of it, I can promise you that." She held him tighter as he shook. "How can you promise such things Teresa, you told me you were going to arrest him?" "I know what I said, sometimes things change." He continued to cry and talk to her. "I miss them so much, I miss my baby girl, I miss laying in my wife's arms all night, I miss coming home to them, now I go there to that, that house and it's nothing there but pain, and memories that I can't relive, I wish I could go back and fix things if there was a way I would." "I know you would Patrick." She cried with him, it hurt her so much to see him like this, it scared her. "I tried once you know." "Tried what?" She pretended she didn't know what he was talking about, but she knew. "I tried to end it all, but someone found me, and called an ambulance, it hurt so much." She couldn't believe it, all the nights that he was there in that office by himself she couldn't help but wonder if he had tried anything. "I haven't sense you came in my life, I know your life wouldn't be the same without me around to bug you." He softly chucked in between crying and she smiled. She couldn't help but ask herself "he's holding on for me?" Out of nowhere he simply said "yes." She continued to hold him as he cried himself to sleep. She propped herself up against the wall and held him tight as he shivered and clung to her, hands fisting in her shirt as he fell asleep. She held him tightly, gently running her fingers through his hair as she began to doze, she wondered how she was going to help him, she already knew what but how would she tell him. She snuggled tightly to him resting her head next to the top of his. Then she realized something else as she held on to him, she loved him.

Well there it is chapter 1. I hope it's good, it went through a lot of changes. Let me know what you think. I hope you guys enjoy it. Thank you once again for all of your support, it really means so much to me. I know I may seem to be repeating myself, but it's the truth, without you guys, this wouldn't be possible!! Please read and review, let me know if you liked it or not.

Crystal*hugs*:0)