A/N: What a long couple of weeks! Sorry for leaving you hanging. I'm currently writing with one hand because of a cast that practically takes up half of my body. Long and frustrating story. Good news is that I'm learning how to write with voice activated software that allowed me to write this update. (Copy and paste was a bitch!) Now that I'm out of the woodwork my chapters will be about this length for the time being. It'll probably be everyday since i'm free now. Enjoy my loves. I'll update soon.
June 18th, 2005- 12:00PM: Grace: Christian where are you? Your grandparents are going to be here soon. They're bringing your cake. Get home as soon as possible. If you're already out will you grab a liter of gingerale?
June 18th, 2005- 12:27PM: Grace: 'hiccup' Christian, I need you here. You better not be doing what I think you're doing! Jesus Christ! 'hiccup'
June 18th, 2005- 2:00PM: Carrick: Where the hell are you? Your grandparents are here to celebrate YOUR birthday. Your mother is pitching a fit! Get your ass back here now. I'm warning you!
June 18th, 2005- 3:33PM: Grace: Get home nowwwwwwww. Wherrrrreeeee the hell are youuuuuu?
June 18th, 2005- 6:00PM: Carrick: YOU'RE GROUNDED! Absolute bullshit! You fucking little... Ugh!
June 18th, 2005- 9:00PM: Elliot: Seriously, dude? Mom and dad are pissed. Come back so Mia and I don't have to hear it. Okay? Please. Dad is on the war path.
June 19th, 2005- 2:00AM: Grace: We're calllllinnnng the pahh-lice. So help meeee God, Christian! Pick up the GOD DayyyyUM PHONE! 'hiccup'.
June 19th, 2005- 6:00AM: Carrick: Your mother is asleep and I am FUCKING pissed off right now. Where the fuck are you?
June 19th, 2005- 7:00AM: Christian, sweetheart. Come home. Where are you? Sweety I'm so sorry, please. Just come home. We love you so very much.
June 19th, 2005- 7:46AM: Carrick: You're in for a world of hurt when you get back here. Be prepared!
INBOX FULL
July 30th, 2006- 3:00PM: Elliot: Your inbox is empty?! Oh my God! Christian, tell me where you're at! Tell me everything! Is this even Christian's phone anymore? Call me back, whoever this is. Please, It's about my brother! Christian if this is you… Mia and I miss you SO MUCH; more than anything. We've done everything we can to find you. Grandpa isn't doing so well. We love you Christian. Please, call us back!
July 31st, 2006- 12:00PM: Mia: Christian, It's your sister. I don't know if you're getting these messages, but please call us back. PLEASE! Elliot and I have been doing everything we can to find you. We haven't given up on you and we won't stop. We love you!
Hundreds of these phone calls came through and I let them all go; just like that. I threw a huge crystal bowl of grapes against the wall. Shards of glass broke against the wall landing onto the floor as Taylor walked in, trying to assess the situation.
"Shit. You okay, Boss?" The look of concern and sadness that I read on Taylor's face wasn't lost on me. It was one of the many times that I was thankful that he was there for me. Taylor never disappointed and he would forever be that strange mix of brother and father mix that would be shameful to ignore.
"This fucking book, Taylor! I can't fucking read it anymore..." I shut the call log's cover quickly and took a sigh of relief that lasted for ten seconds until I remembered the contents within. Taylor sat on the edge of the couch in my office at Escala and looked at me seriously. His muscled leg bulged and I was instantly reminded of my impending appointment with Bastille.
"What are we going to do about this? I can't stand around and watch you torture yourself." Taylor was a man who always had a game plan. Nothing went past him and nothing ever would when it came to me.
"I want Elliot in my office WITH you this afternoon. Make it happen and PLEASE don't be a bitch about it." I didn't blink when Taylor nodded in an amused agreement. I knew he had been waiting for this moment since I had met him. As much as he was on my side, he was on Elliot and Mia's side as well, and even if I didn't see it, I can now understand why.
"Sure thing." Taylor walked over to me and put both of his hands on my shoulders. An act he rarely did sober. "Christian. I love you more than anything in this world and I know this has to be difficult for you, but I can't tell you how proud I am of of you. " He sniffed abruptly as his hint of tears showed and turned away quickly, wiping his brow and walking the other way. He closed the door behind him and all I could hear was silence. I sat there staring at the wall, predicting the outcome of my meeting with Elliot. What do you say? What do you do? There was nothing to forgive or forget because he never actually did anything TO me. I was more upset at the fact that he didn't have my back. He was more of an idea than a brother that I didn't get to utilize. I could at least understand the concept of him because I had Taylor. Taylor WAS my brother in every sense of the word. If I was gay, Taylor would be it for me. I choked on my own spit at the thought. My sister, if I could call her that… Well I didn't even know how to deal with her then. What the hell do I do with her now? Ugh… Formalities!
"Good morning Mr. Grey." A perky, yet nervous receptionist stood up from the dark marble desk in the Grey House lobby, trying to get my attention. Fuck off! I have yet to see a sincere bone in anyone's bodies! Note to self… Take over Human Resources for one day.
"What do you have that I don't?" Taylor joked with a wink.
"A fucking bank account and a stunning jaw line." We both laughed. "You do realize that you have a fanclub of your own, right?" Taylor did. He had his own website dedicated to him and his 'Miracle Ass'.
"No one worth mentioning." He slurped out of his Macchiato and smirked.
"You have it so bad for Gail, It's disgusting. 'would you like hashbrowns with those biscuits Tayyyylor?'" I smiled at him. We always had this perfect momentum with each other. I wouldn't trade it for the world, even though the world thought I was stoned cold. He didn't. Neither did Ana. I warmed at the thought of her.
"Fuck off, let's focus on today's agenda instead of my spontaneous boners, please." Taylor and I both chuckled before the elevator doors sprang open and then we both shut our warm personalities down immediately. Our faces went stone cold and merciless. I took a small breath and walked off the elevator with a grunt and without a single care in the fucking world. No one dared to look at Taylor and I and everyone in our path split off in different direction; just like I predicted. The feeling that I owned the world happened at that very instant. The only person I could see was Olivia running to her post trying to pimp herself out and Andrea looking at her like she was a moron. Andrea was incredible. Even if Ana wasn't in the picture, Andrea made a name for herself and was truly remarkable. A true keeper in corporate world.
"Morning, Mr. Grey." Andrea genuinely smiled at me and I snuck a small one back before anyone could notice.
"Morning. Andrea." I ignored Olivia like I always did because she was gross and walked through my large wooden office doors, Taylor and Andrea followed quickly behind me. I sat behind my desk and quickly organized through the stack of files that Andrea had left for me in order of importance. She was a star, but not as bright as my Ana. Oh, Ana.
"Sir, Mr. Grey should be in shortly. Anything you need?" I tried to read Andrea and see if Ana had anything to do with her motherly instincts today, but I knew Ana wouldn't cross that line. I shook my head while I smirked at the thought of my girl and looked at Taylor who looked like he read my mind.
"I'll be by the door. Whatever you need, just yell for me. It has never a problem before." Taylor smiled.
"Fuck you! Get back to work!" I smirked. Andrea didn't totally get Taylor and I's relationship and that's how I wanted it. Nothing came between us and nothing ever would. He was my security in every sense of the word. It was my business.
"Sir, I have all of these appointments set up…" Andrea pointed her pen towards her iPad and motioned it downwards towards the end of the day. "I…" She tried to finish.
"Andrea, just tell me when Elliot gets here and send him in." I could tell she was on edge, and I knew it was because she was THAT good of a personal assistant. She could read the fuck out of me. She nodded and left the room, closing the door behind her. I took a deep breath and centered myself.
"Boss, He'll be here in five. Need a pistol?" Taylor tried to lighten to the mood and I flipped him off. I was about to say something in response, but Andrea chimed in.
"Sir! Mr. Grey is here! He's early." Andrea sounded out of breath. She was anticipating this and I could tell she was nervous about it.
"Send him in Andrea." Taylor and I looked at each other and I could feel the support pouring over me from Taylor. The man wanted nothing more than this moment to happen for me. He looked like a God damn proud sibling over there in his fucking corner. I shook out whatever it was that had me nervous and I looked towards the double wooden doors that opened slowly. My mind was blown as I watched a strikingly handsome blonde man at 6'2" with an incredible build walk through my doors. When I saw him at the carnival I didn't seem much because I had tunnel vision, but now I saw all of him. Elliot motioned to hug me, but I stayed put. I must have looked like a fish out of water. My mouth went dry and I felt a tick in my neck.
"Christian... " Elliot was obviously choked up and I caught a hint of it. I just couldn't show it.
"Elliot." I took a deep breath. I needed to release the tension in my throat.
"God, Let me just say that I'm so sorry about the carnival. It was awful and I feel horrible. I didn't mean to ambush you like that and Ana was only doing me the biggest favor I could ask of someone. I hope I didn't come in between you two." He was more concerned about Ana and I?
"No." What the fuck do I say to that?
"Did you get my calls, Christian? I can't sit here and shoot the shit with you. I can't. I've tried for so long. I just NEED to know if you want me in your life so I can finally move on. I deserve that!" Elliot looked around nervously. He looked awkward in his dirty fitted jeans, work boots and black t-shirt.
"Elliot, I…."
"I get it… Bad Idea… Who the FUCK was I kidding? Gah!…" Elliot stood up after gathering himself. Taylor gave me an evil glare.
"No Elliot, Sit back down." I pushed the anxiety away and envisioned the call log. The things he said. The things Elliot called for. He TRIED. Elliot even called me when he first tried anal. It was a drunk dial, but when I read it earlier this morning I cracked a smile.
"We miss you… So much!" I could sense that Elliot didn't know how open he could be in this environment. I was well protected and he needed to be under control.
"I read all of your messages for the first time this morning…" I looked away towards the skyline.
"What?" He grabbed my attention with his tone.
"I read your calls this morning." I reiterated.
"You haven't been reading them all along?" He asked in disbelief.
"No, Elliot. Why would I? Are you fucking SERIOUS?!" I scoffed.
"BECAUSE! I'M YOUR FUCKING FAMILY!" Taylor walked towards me in case I needed it, but i held my hand up to keep him at a distance.
"Do you FUCKING BLAME ME!? What to you FUCKING think Elliot?!" I couldn't live a lie.
"God, Christian! I don't even know what to say anymore. Take me or fucking leave me!" I looked over at Elliot who was hunched over, defeated, fiddling with his fingers and tapping his feet out of nervousness. Taylor gave me a nod out of concern to go ahead and hear Elliot out.
"Go on, Elliot." I said softly.
"Mia and I have been looking for you for years. We have always known your place of business, but we could never get in without an appointment, but the way you screen things makes it impossible. I'm here because I want you back. We want you back. Mom and dad are out of our lives as much as yours. They're fucking washed up alcoholics. Mia and I have been WAITING for this opportunity to get our brother back and I hope you're able to…"
"Alcoholics?" I asked.
"Mom and dad were fucking wasted during our entire upbringing. We just never knew exactly. Doesn't excuse the shitty fucking job they did at raising us and without them we would have never known each other, but look… we're brothers Christian... We're BROTHERS!" Elliot was so sincere. It really broke the heart I didn't have.
"Elliot." I couldn't fight the lump in my throat. Taylor took notice my struggle and handed me his weak coffee to help give me a boost.
"Christian, I know…"
"No, Elliot…. FUCK!" I threw the coffee against the wall, startling Elliot and Taylor. "I want to know you! For FUCK'S SAKE! I WANT TO KNOW YOU!" I threw my hands in my hair and leaned against my palms as I rested against my elbows. "I want to know you." I said softly. It was silent in my office, but I could make out the clicking of Taylor's knee in the corner of the room that always drove me crazy.
"Really?" Elliot smirked in a soft way.
"Fuck… Sure, I'd really like to get to know you." I looked towards Taylor who gave me a beaming smile. I could see why women thought he was beautiful. That fucker!
"Christian…" Elliot smiled.
"It is what it is Elliot." Taylor shot me a dirty look. "I mean. Let's see where it goes." I nodded.
"All Mia and I want to do is get to know you. I miss having a fucking brother! You know?" I don't know, because I already do thanks to Taylor. He has been the only brother that I have ever needed..
"Sure." I nodded. Okay. I'm over this. Something must be filling my void already. Taylor, Gail, Ana… What else? I don't know, but Elliot and Mia are only add ons.
"I don't want to take up much more of your day, but I'd like to invite you to my yacht this weekend. Mia, myself and you can bring whoever you'd like. As long as you come." Elliot smiled. He was genuine. Taylor nodded.
"I'll be there. I'll have Andrea set it up." I looked indifferent as Elliot stood up and headed towards the door.
"You look really good Christian." Elliot looked at me with his big blue eyes.
"Thanks, you do too, Elliot. " I nodded and allowed him to leave; closing the door behind him.