Regrets

I do not own nothing.

The time had finally come for both Mike and Kate to head back to Hammersley. They both didn't want to go but they both knew the kids were going to be fine with Nikki, so that gave them some peace of mind.

Kate had got all their kids stuff ready the night before, it was always better to be prepared with kids she had learnt over time, Kate felt quite sick, it was the first time both of them had left the kids. What happened if something went wrong? What happens if Hammersley sunk and everyone died? What about the kids then? So many questions ran through Kate's mind, but nothing like that had ever happened before. Yeah okay, there was some misses, like catching fire once, and being shot a good few times like that, but everything was always alright in the end.

Kate had already got her stuff ready the night before, they were going to be leaving early so she didn't want to like forget anything. She also thought she might be able to get an extra hour in bed maybe, but that wasn't going to happen when she was awake at this time. It was only five in the morning and Mike was sleeping soundly next to her. So she decided to get up instead of tossing and turning waking him up. He was going to need his sleep right now, because he wasn't going to get much on the ship again.

She got up and checked on the children in their rooms, they were fast asleep too. Trust her to be awake when everyone else in the house is asleep. Any normal day would be that the kids are wide awake and waking her up when she didn't want to be awoken. Suppose it's sods law really.

She threw her dressing gown on and walked downstairs, she decided to make some fresh coffee, it took a while to make, so she put it on now, and went to get a shower in one of the spare bathrooms away from the bedrooms in fear of waking any of the others up.

It was now six in the morning and everyone else was still sleeping soundly, she decided to leave her hair and not dry it, it would wake the others up. She got dressed into suitable clothes for the Hammersley and went downstairs to get the coffee which she made earlier. She poured herself a coffee and proceeded to make sure she had all the kids stuff sorted for when they went to Nikki's.

She heard footsteps coming from upstairs. They were heavy footprints so she automatically knew it was Mike. She heard the shower doors close, Mike didn't take long to get ready in the morning so she poured him a cup of coffee. Kate was right, it didn't take Mike long, she heard the shower doors open within four minutes of him getting into the shower. He had his clothes sorted so she knew he would be down within a second.

Right on cue, Mike walked down the stairs and noticed get was ready and dressed, "You're up early," Mike stated the obvious.

"Aye, here is a coffee," Kate said handing Mike the coffee.

"Ah, thanks love, just what I needed. You feeling okay about this, the kids will be fine with Nikki you know," Mike said putting his hands around Kate's waist.

"Well, it is a bit too late to do anything about it now isn't there?" Kate replied.

"Oh come on Kate, relax, the kids will enjoy it. It will be like a holiday to them, you know how much they love little Josh. our Joshua thinks it's amazing to have another boy around, he doesn't feel so left out," Mike laughed.

"Yeah, it was always nice for him to play with another boy, even though he is much younger," Kate smiled.

"Hmm, Kate that reminds me to ask. When are we going to have more kids," Mike smiled cheekily at Kate.

"I told you we weren't having any more kids end of. You only want more kids because you want another boy to equal it out, you just feel outnumbered that's all. You're such a big kid Mike, grow up," Kate laughed.

"Kate! I told you when we first started going out, that I wanted a football team. And now you aren't giving me it. That just isn't fair," Mike said in a mock paddy.

"Mike, I didn't say I was going to give you a foot ball team, so pack you moaning in. Be grateful what you have. Just think, more kids means more bills, more cars to buy, more weddings to pay for, more boyfriend and girlfriend problems, do you really want me to go on?" Kate laughed.

To be fair, they had enough money to pay for all that, they had quite a bit saved from inheritance and insurance and what not but Mike dealing with emotional problems wasn't his strong point.

"Yeah, enough said," Mike accepted his defeat.

Kate and Mike finished getting what they had to do before going to wake the kids up. Neither of them liked to do this, but they had to. Especially today, they didn't want to leave without saying bye. The kids understood that their mummy and daddy had to go away for a bit and they were looking forward to their holiday with aunty Nikki and aunty Becca who was helping Nikki. Three children were a lot but it was going to give Becca some ideas what children were like, even thought Mike and Kate's were now older. It gave her a feeling of how they are when they were getting a little older and more troublesome. They were also told that Steve was coming to take them out with his lovely wife. This kids loved spending time with them two as well. They were always spoilt rotten when they went out with them two.

Kate helped the children get dressed while Mike prepared their breakfasts, it was quickly approaching seven and they needed to be on the ship just before nine so it started turning into a mad dash. No matter how early you get up, you always seem to be running round last minute.

"Kate? Kate are they ready? The breakfasts are ready," Mike shouted.

"Yeah, we are coming now," Kate shouted back down.

With that Mike served the kids their breakfast, Mike managed to eat something, he always did, he had a stomach made out of cast iron.

"Kate, you sure you don't want to eat anything?" Mike asked.

"I am quite sure, I feel sick," Kate replied.

"Kate? What is the matter?" Mike asked concerned.

"I'm nervous, I'm nervous about getting back on the Hammersley and leaving the kids behind," Kate finished.

"What, it was only like two months ago that you were on the Hammersley, so why are you nervous all a sudden? You weren't nervous last time," Mike concluded.

"No Mike, but last time you were looking after the kids and now that both of us are away I just don't know whether I will be able to cope. What happens if they need us? And we are here? We will be millions of miles away and we couldn't do a thing about it," Kate added with tears welling up in her eyes.

"Kate relax, the kids will be fine I promise you. Like I said earlier they are looking forward to it, they are kids, they don't really care where they are, or who they are with as long as they are having a good time. Nikki, Becca and Steve and his wife, will be fine with them. Steve said that if there was any problems he would yet back in touch with us and bring Hammersley back to port. He has the authority to do that, and I put my trust in with the four of them. They are perfectly capable of looking after them between the four of them," Mike finished.

"Thanks Mike, thanks for reassuring me, just thank you for being here. I just know I couldn't have done this without you. You have been my brick through everything, always there for me. It really does mean a lot that you support me through everything. You are the best husband anyone could have asked for, I just thought when I saw you on Hammersley the day I got posted it broke my heart to see you again. I didn't think I would be able to cope. I never wanted to see you again. But it time I learnt to love you again, well actually no not learn to love you, learn to trust you because I never stopped loving you. I just lost faith in you. When we started getting close again, I felt safe, and now, I don't think I could ever live without you, not ever," Kate finished.

Mike was shocked that she came out with it, Kate had never mentioned any of this before.

"Kate, I am truly sorry for what I did to you all those years ago, I never wanted to, but I just, I don't know felt I had to. When I saw you on the Hammersley for the first time again, I had to do a double take. I just couldn't believe it. It was a shock to even see you again. As soon as I saw you, I instantly remembered all the love I had for you, all the love that I had tried to hide. I didn't think you would remember who I was, after all we were both young. I didn't think you would even have feelings for me, well ones except hatred. I know what I did all those years ago was very wrong, and I honestly regret what I did. I know you have forgiven me now, but I didn't think you ever would. I didn't think we would ever have what we have now. It is truly amazing. Kate you are my life, and will be the rest of my life. We have three beautiful children and I have the most amazing wife. I promise never to hurt you like a did all those years ago and I vow to protect you. Kate, I love you more than anything," Mike finished.

Kate was now in floods of tears, that was one of the nicest things that Mike had ever said to her, but how long had it taken to admit anything like that. Mike didn't like to admit that he was wrong very often and when he did it was rare and should have been recorded. It was a shame Kate hadn't had the camera to record it. Kate laughed to herself which didn't go unnoticed by Mike.

"What you laughing at?" Mike asked.

"Oh, nothing, just the fact that it was very rare that you admit you were wrong," Kate smiled.

"Well Kate, leaving you was one of the worst mistakes I have ever made in my life. I had no reason to leave you apart from over a stupid career. Why or why did I leave you? Are careers don't mean anything when we have what we have. I never what anything to ever come between me and you again, and certainly now a career. When we come back off this silly little patrol, I am booking a holiday, somewhere nice and abroad, for me and the kids. I know we didn't have a honeymoon so this is it. It is going to be perfect and I am going to spoil all of us, because that is what we all deserve," Mike finished.

Kate walked over to Mike, "That will be amazing, I can't wait, it is something for us all to look forward to. Do you want me to make the details and plans when we get back?" Kate asked.

"No, definitely not, this is all my plans and they will be a secret, you will just have to wait and see. But I promise you, it will be a holiday of a lifetime, you deserve the very best," Mike smiled holding Kate tighter.

"And I do have the very best, I have you," Kate smiled giving Mike a kiss.

"Well, I do try," Mike laughed.

"Come on, don't you think we better be getting a move on, instead of going soppy on me, Mike Flynn," Kate laughed.

"Well you can talk, Kate Flynn," Mike said giving Kate a final kiss.

With that, they got the all the kids together, packed all their stuff into the car, making sure they hadn't forgot anything. And drove the ten minutes to Nikki's. They took all the bags inside for Nikki and told her to ring if any problems. Kate and Mike said their tearful goodbyes to the children, but they didn't seem bothered, they were more excited in little Joshua and what they had planned for the day. This made Kate and Mike a little more at ease knowing they won't miss them too much.

With that Mike and Kate got back into the car and drove to the port. They parked up and carried their stuff on board. Nobody knew who their new CO and XO were, they could have guessed but they probably wouldn't have been right. After all would Kate and Mike leave the kids? Yeah of course they would after some hard persuasion but the sailors didn't know that so it was going to be a surprise for them.

No one else was on the ship so Mike and Kate went their separate ways to their cabins which they didn't have to share with any sailors and met up on the bridge a few minutes later. All they needed now were their crew and they could set sail.

Neither of them could wait to see their faces when they found out, but they also couldn't wait to get back home and they hadn't even set sail yet. Mike had plenty of time to think about where they were going to go for their holiday of a lifetime.

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