August, 2007

Hermione woke up in the morning with an upset stomach and a terrible headache. Luckily she was familiar with spells to help with the aftereffects of alcohol and it cleared her symptoms up quite nicely. Once she was right as rain again, Hermione sat up in bed and gazed out at the scene ahead of her.

Glass French doors led from her bedroom and out to the massive living room where her maid of honor and her bridesmaids were contentedly sleeping where they had fallen during the night. It was early. She had plenty of time to lay back in bed, drift into another deep sleep, and then wake up in order to prepare for the wedding. Unfortunately, Hermione was wide awake and she couldn't sleep. Not to mention her thoughts kept running back to four hours ago when she and Draco were in each other's arms.

There were times when Hermione thought about what it would be like to have Draco as a boyfriend. Although those times were few and spread out across her lifelong friendship with him, they had been thought of nonetheless. She'd think of what it would be like to kiss him. She'd think about what it would be like if she lived with him. And most importantly, she'd think about what it'd be like to just stand with him in public. Just stand. The fact that that last bit made it onto Hermione's top three wants with Draco further enforced the reasons why they could never be together. To the world they were taboo. Had they been together they would've been talked about endlessly and persecuted by both friends and strangers. Hermione felt that love shouldn't be kept secret, and if that's what had to be done to be with Draco, she'd rather just be friends. Best friends.

These thoughts aside, Hermione managed to sleep more, be woken up by her maid of honor and bridesmaids, fed a gourmet breakfast, and then dressed. The suite had been vacated so that Hermione could have it to herself while her friends were in two adjoining bedrooms. At the end of it all, she stood in front of her ceiling-to-floor mirror and stared at herself. Hermione had tried on her wedding gown several times before today, but since it was actually her wedding day, it made it all the more special. It seemed longer than it had before. Whiter than it had before. It was all so surreal that she felt like she would cry. She wouldn't, though. Despite being aided with magic, it took Ginny ages to get her makeup done and the young redhead would jump over tables if it got messed up.

Hermione had been so absorbed in herself that she had failed to hear the repeated knocks on her door. "Come in!" She called. She turned to her visitor and, although she was happy, was completely surprised.

"Draco! I thought I told you to go home last night?"

"And I did." Draco replied as he let his hands rest in his pockets. "I went home, slept off the rest of that champagne, had breakfast with the Misses and told her I had business to attend to for the rest of the day."

Hermione smiled at him and crossed her arms over her chest. "Astoria's going to be furious with you."

"You're worth a moody wife for a few hours." Draco said as he pulled Hermione into the longest hug imaginable. When they pulled away and Draco stared in her eyes, allowing himself to push a loose curl behind her ear. "You look beautiful, Hermione. Really,"

"Thank you, Draco. Now, aside from risking an unhappy home, you do realize that if anyone sees you here, you're a dead man."

"You came to my wedding."

"Yes," Hermione agreed. "But I was under a Chameleon Charm."

"And I did better." Draco grinned. "Look at my reflection in the mirror."

Hermione stared at him curiously but did what he said. When she finally realized it, she couldn't help but laugh at his brilliance. As she stared in the mirror, she didn't see Draco. Instead, there was a heavyset gentleman with graying hair and light beard.

"…You used an Illusion Charm."

"That's right." Draco replied triumphantly. "So now I look like that muggle fellow. What's his name? The one that breaks into your house but doesn't take anything?"

Hermione laughed. "Santa Claus,"

Draco snapped his fingers and nodded. "Yeah, him. I'll be the Uncle Nicholas that your family has forgotten all about and who dances suggestively with his niece at the reception."

"Or," Hermione interjected. "You can be the coworker who I invited and who dances as appropriately as possible."

Draco shrugged. "Eh, not as much fun, but I'll certainly take it."

"Hermione?" Ginny's voice suddenly rang into the room. Hermione instantly panicked as Draco quickly jetted from her side and behind the mirror that she had been staring into not so long ago. "Were you just talking to someone?"

"No, no," Hermione lied as she nervously laughed. "Vows… Only Merlin knows how many times I've repeated them for the morning."

Ginny smiled broadly. "Take it from someone who got married last year. You forget everything. But once it comes from your heart, it doesn't matter. Now come on, let's get you married to my brother."

Hermione had always loved the beach and it only took one attempt for Ron to agree that it would be the perfect location for a wedding. A simple spell allowed the sand to take on a cement-like feel so that no one's shoes sank into it. A large white wedding tent extended across the beach and pillars with flowers were equally placed around. The ceiling was bathed with balls of light and a bodiless orchestra was playing in the background.

As Hermione was led down the aisle on her father's arm, she could see Ron's face transitioning from a terrible pallor to one mingled with excitement and nervousness. She was feeling just as nervous as she grew closer to the front of the ceremony. Her heart was beating erratically and her body was shaking terribly beneath her gown. Her situation didn't better itself when her father let her go and she stood in front of Ron. What if she choked? What if when it was time to say her vows, or worse when she was supposed to say "I do" that her voice shriveled up?

Hermione was panicking. She let her eyes scan the crowd and, to her surprise, found Draco sitting in the second row. She couldn't even fathom how he had managed to wrangle that seat, but she was happy that he did. He stared at her with soft, gentle eyes and mouthed one word, "Breathe." She did as she was told and took a deep, but imperceptible breath as Ron took her hands in his. The moment she did, time seemed to fly. In a second, Hermione was saying her vows. A moment later she was trying her hardest not to cry when Ron said his. Rings were exchanged. A kiss was had. And Hermione had gone from being a Granger to a Weasley all under an hour.

At the reception Hermione couldn't have been happier or more tired. She had been on her feet dancing with everyone in sight and running her heels down to the nub. Just when she thought that she would sit down there was a tap on her shoulder. She was tempted to immediately decline, but stopped herself from doing so when she realized that it was Draco. One more dance couldn't hurt.

"I still can't believe you're married now." Draco said as they danced. "And here I was thinking that you'd stay unwed for the rest of your life, pining away for the man that you could never have."

"You're married already." Hermione laughed. "You mean to tell me that you'd be unfaithful? Shame on you."

Draco pursed his lip in thought. "Shame, yes, but stereotypically expected of a man at some point in his life."

Hermione smirked. "And now that I'm married? What then?"

"I could never let you be an adulteress." Draco replied. "So, I guess it looks like we're both untouchable now."

"We were always untouchable, Draco."

Draco nodded and he gave Hermione a gentle twirl as they danced, mumbling the words, "Unfortunately so," before she was spun back into his arms.

April 2008

Draco equally hated and loved surprises. What he hated about them was the waiting and the hints that teased at what they were. What he loved about them was, of course, actually finding out. They were usually worth the wait, but this time around Draco was impatient. Astoria had blocked out her entire day and had forced Draco to do the same so that they could spend it distraction free. Aside from the agonizing anticipation, Draco had enjoyed himself. Although he oftentimes felt that he and his darling wife were stuck in a rut, it was days like these that he lived for. Spontaneity was in them. Carefree fun was there. It was like they were dating again and he couldn't have been happier.

Towards the end of the day as the pair was lying in bed, Draco was positively whining. "Come on, Astoria." He said to her. "Where's this surprise?"

"I don't know if I should tell you now." Astoria giggled. Her head was resting on his chest and his arms were wrapped around her. "I kind of like the idea of torturing you."

"Oh, I can tell. How about this, you tell me what you've got up your sleeve now and I'll buy you whatever you want tomorrow. Cost will be an afterthought."

"Bribery," Astoria playfully scoffed. "Always playing up to your strengths, yes?"

Draco couldn't help but smile. "Yes. So, did the bribe work or not?"

"Well, you could do better. But I'm dying to tell you regardless." She told him and reached over Draco so that she could take something out of the top drawer of the night stand. It was a small green box and it was placed on Draco's chest. "Open it."

Draco eyed his wife curiously before opening the box. Once the cover was resting on the night stand, the answer to his surprise still eluded him. He took out a tiny pair of green gloves that couldn't fit anyone but a child. It was then that he looked at Astoria as she beamed at him.

"It'll be January when he or she is born." Astoria said happily. "So they'll be necessary."

Draco was speechless. His eyes drifted back down to the green baby gloves in his hands and he continued to stare. Everything around him melted away and all sounds were dulled. The only thing that was holding his attention were the gloves. Distantly he could hear Astoria's voice. She was eagerly asking him to say something.

"We said that we'd wait." Draco said softly. From the corner of his eye he could see Astoria's face falter. She frowned and shrugged.

"I know, but…sometimes plans don't always work out the way you think."

Draco snapped his eyes to her quickly. "This was supposed to."

"Why are you acting like this?" Astoria replied angrily. "Draco, you're going to be a father. You should be happy, not moaning about it like it's the end of the world."

Astoria climbed out of bed and fled the bedroom, slamming the doors after her. Draco continued to sit in bed, his hands holding the gloves. The more he stared at them, the more his heart started to race. And the more his chest hurt, the more ready Draco was to flee like Astoria had done.

So that's what he did.

Draco didn't even bother to change out of his nightwear. He simply donned a light jacket and disapparated from where he stood. Where he was standing now was a park that he often frequented when he had nowhere else to go. As he walked along brick pathways and around unkempt shrubbery and old fountains, he felt cold and alone. This was the first time he had ever ventured through this park by himself. This was his and Hermione's park. It was the same one where they had first met and where they sometimes got together when they wanted to catch up. Had Draco not been in such a hurry to leave his home, he would've Owled Hermione and asked her if she could steal away some time for him. It was likely that her answer would've been no, however. Aside from the late hour, her husband had been quite affectionate as of late and wouldn't dare let her leave his sight.

Hermione was pregnant too. She had written him about it when she had found out and Draco couldn't have been happier for her. She would make an excellent mother. And yet, why couldn't he be happy for his own wife? Or for himself for that matter? After walking around the park twice Draco finally came to the conclusion of why that was. With Hermione, it wasn't he who would be a father. He wouldn't have to care for a life. He wouldn't have a chance to mess it up. When he and Astoria had gotten married they had settled on four years. They'd wait until then before having children. By then they'd be thirty and had enjoyed married life without any responsibilities except towards each other. And by then Draco had hoped to be a better husband.

It didn't take an expert to know that he was a terrible one. Look at his actions now. Astoria had stormed off and was without a doubt somewhere within their home. Draco had fled his home entirely to the place he shared with the woman who took up the most room in his heart. He loved Hermione, yes. He loved her more than the best friend he claimed her to be, but less than the love that was required for a relationship. Or at least that's what he told himself. It's what he had to tell himself. Anything to justify why he put Hermione on a pedestal that she didn't deserve.

With a reluctant sigh, his walk ended. If he couldn't love Astoria properly, what made him think he could love someone else the way he should? Draco wasn't ready. He was too selfish to be a father.

Author's note: I feel so much for Draco in this chapter. I think of two or so more times throughout this story I'll feel the same, so beware!

Much thanks to everyone. You help spur my imagination :)

-WP