Teenage Dream Chapter 23: Hide and seek, a glee fanfic

A/N: First of all I want to apologize because of the delay! I'm really sorry and I feel bad that I broke the promise! But I told you the last time that I was going to be out of my city and I wouldn't have my notebook and all; well, for some reasons my stay out of the city was extended and I just came back and it's really late here, but I wanted to update as fast as I could. That's why I couldn't update the 29; but I promise that after this, I'll update every Saturday as usual and everything will return to normality! The good thing is that you'll have to wait only 5 days to read the next chapter! And I also I just read all the reviews! Thank you for the greetings and the reviews! I'll try to write as coherent as I can now, but if you find mistakes and nonsense sentences, it's because the bitch of my brain doesn't want to work! Okay, here I go!

alicegursk: Have you really laughed when Chuck and Jen talked about condoms and all of that? To be honest, I wasn't sure about that conversation because I didn't know how you all were going to take it; I mean, I was all the time thinking that maybe you wouldn't like it or that maybe it was going to be offensive for some people; but finally I dared and I'm glad that you enjoyed it; after all, it's something normal! About the award! haha you made me imagine myself wearing a damn amazing dress receiving the award and thanking all the people and also saying 'Thanks, Hermione!' or saying 'Thank Dead God!' as the Starkid would say! If ever I become famous, just walk to me, and say your name and I'll introduce you to the people as the girl who read my silly fanfiction, when I was just starting this whole thing! Now you'll find what the hell is in the mirror! You had to wait for a long time, but finally you'll know it and things will get really heavy! Ready to read?

Kaylacriss332: haha I know, it was a terrible cliffhanger this time and worse was that you had to wait a long time to find out what the fuck is in the mirror! Terrible, terrible! And I was telling Alice that I wasn't sure about that conversation between Chuck, Jen and Darren, about the condoms and all; because I wasn't sure if you were going to like to read sexual things and all that; but I finally dared to write about it, so now I'll feel more comfortable writing about that stuff! I feel bad that I have to say that sadly you didn't have to wait 10 days; you had to wait like what? About 11 or 12 days, not sure, didn't count! But finally you're gonna read it and I hope you can be ready to know what's in the mirror and what's gonna happen next!

caarolineboeira1: Have you finished high school? In that case, congratulations! :D I hope you had a blast! Are you going to college? If that's the case, what are you going to study? I'm really curious, right? And when you told me that picturing what you read-write like a movie, I started to think that maybe you and I aren't so different! Ah! Good line chosen! Trust me, I have a boyfriend and he doesn't say all of those cute things; well, sometimes yes, but not all the time; anyway I love him. You need Darren, this fictional Darren and maybe also the real deal! haha. About Mandy, I think that nobody can fully trust on her! Maybe you shouldn't or maybe you should... you'll find it out soon! W, such a bitch! hahahaha about the towel and the emergency! Well, maybe Freckles was just kidding and she wanted to look sexy in front of Darren only with a towel, so she could be only with Darren again; or maybe she was being serious and something bad was happening; again, you'll find it out soon, in this chapter! The world hasn't ended, but the world didn't let me update until today! Too bad, I know, very bad of me. I promise that since today, I'll update every Saturday as usual!

Sarah: First, you're welcome! But second, I'm very sorry that I couldn't update the day that I promised! I feel really bad and more considering the stupid cliffhanger that I wrote in the last chapter! It won't happen again, the delay thing. I told other people that I wasn't sure about writing that thing of 'free sexual education class'. I wasn't sure if you were going to like it, of you were going to laugh about it, if you were going to enjoy it; or if you were going to hate it, if you were going to find it offensive or even not proper. But well, I dared to write about it and it seems that many of you liked it, so now I feel better and I feel more comfortable to keep writing things like those. Now, again, sorry for the delay; but finally here's the chapter and you'll find out what was in the mirror!

Monique: I know, it was a terrible and hideous cliffhanger! And also was hideous how long you had to wait to read this new chapter, but finally is here! The good thing is that this Saturday I'll update the next chapter! So you won't have to wait for so long! Because the way it ends this chapter... Well, you can picture it, I think that you already know that I'm married the cliffhangers or something ridiculous like that! Thank you for your greetings! :)

RoseIsabelleCarrow: I hope that this you wrote 'You are simply amazing with all of your outrageous cliffhangers' is a compliment; otherwise I'll kick weiner dogs in Pigfarts to let out my sadness. Just kidding, stupid joke considering the time here, it's really late and I have no brain. Nah, really now; thank you a lot for what you said! I'm super happy to know that you like this story; I know it can't be like Chain Letters, but well, I try to do my best! Thank you, thank you, and thank you! :)

LiesMiranda: You don't have to be sorry! It's alright if you forget to review! I'm just glad that you're reading the story, that is what matters and that is more than enough for me! Well, you see, I'm the one who must apologize because you reviewed this chapter in a hurry because I was supposedly going to update the next chapter earlier, but I couldn't make it in time and you had to wait more time to read this new chapter! I know about the cliffhangers, when I'm the reader, I hate the cliffhangers because I always want to read the next chapter quickly; it happens to me with some books, hence why I can read an entire book in a matter of few days. So I can picture how annoying and how intriguing these cliffhangers can be! I really liked your suggestion and you're completely right! The point is that Darren/Freckles just started this new relationship and everything is recent and new, and they're scared, they're spinning their feelings and all because of the fact that they do want to be together, but then they get angry, but they want to be fine to be together and all love and that, because they want to know what is that about. I was thinking that maybe when the relationship is already settled and they already found out completely what being in love is, is when the problems of the normal and realistic relationships are gonna start! Uh! I have lot to write about it but it'll happen later! I don't know if I explained myself here, you know that I tend to ramble and all that, I suck at this! haha. Oh well! Again one of your funny analogies! Oh gosh, I love them! You seem to be very sure and I don't know I'm starting to think that you have like a power to guess what's going to happen next; you always guess everything! All I can say right now is: Is your car ready?

Alright guys, again, I apologize and I hope you can enjoy this new chapter. And guess what? It's December 31 already here! So I wanted to wish you a totally awesome New Year's Eve and a happy New Year! I hope this New Year can be even better than this year! Have a really good time with your family, friends and beloved people! See you again on Saturday!

Teenage Dream – Part 23 – Hide and seek.

"What the hell is that?" Darren asked as if he was just as scared as you were.

"I don't know." You answered with teary and trembling voice because of the fear. "I just came here to take a shower and I saw it. Darren!" You exclaimed desperate.

You wanted and needed some kind of protection. He noticed it, so he wrapped his arms around you and kissed your head to try to reassure you, but he was also trembling. He also seemed to not know what it was.

"Maybe... Maybe is a joke; maybe Chuck or Jen did it." Darren replied but unsure.

"You know it's not a joke, Darren. How did this happen? How?" You asked very nervous and scared.

"I don't know, baby." Darren answered with trembling voice, looking around in search of someone or a proof. There was nothing.

"It's the same lipstick that was in the school bathroom. Darren, why is it there? How is it possible?" You asked insistent, trying to get some kind of answer, but he was in the same confusing situation than you.

"I don't know, it must be a joke..." Darren said nervous, gulping.

"It is not." You answered with cracked voice, wanting to cry.

"Yeah, it is not. I just don't wanna think that W found the way to break into my house." Darren said edgy, looking around. "The window is open. Baby, have you opened it?" He asked nervous and you saw the window and shook your head, feeling even more scared.

"No, I haven't."

Darren walked to where the window was and checked it intently. He was serious, frowning; he was pale and his body was still trembling. Still, he seemed to be trying hard to seem calm, for you.

"The window has been smashed. W surely broke into the house by here." Darren assured scared but trying to sound calm.

You looked at him worried and then you looked at the mirror again. It was impossible. How could have W done it without being noticed by Chuck or Jen? You read over again the message in the mirror, written with the same red lipstick that you saw once written in the school bathroom.

"You're playing dirty, pimple face. Not only you moved into Criss' house; now it comes to happen that you're his girlfriend and I told you to be away from the stupid guy. Not cool. That wasn't a rule of the game and, as a punishment for breaking the rules, this person is also gonna play dirty. Die, bitch. -W-"

You looked at Darren again who was now looking at the ceiling, frowning as never before; he seemed to be analyzing something so you let him. You looked at the mirror again and you walked closer. You felt something; you stepped on something on the floor, like a nylon yarn.

"Watch out!" Darren yelled and he quickly pounced on you, throwing you to the floor.

You looked up scared to find a knife aiming right to where you were seconds ago before Darren threw you on the floor. You couldn't hold back the tears of fear. If it wasn't for Darren, now you probably would be stabbed. Darren held you in his arms very tightly and he caressed your hair trying to calm you. His body was trembling and his heart was beating fast, but he was still trying to comfort you. How was this possible? W was going so far; now this not only was a verbal aggression, it was also a physical aggression; this was something that only an assassin would do. Darren extended one of his arms to grab the knife.

"It's a rubber knife." Darren said with trembling voice, throwing it violently to the wall. "This is going out of control, this is too much. We need to stop this." Darren said firmly but still trembling as you were still crying because of the fear and the fright. Then he kissed your forehead and rubbed your back reassuringly. "It's okay, baby. I'm gonna stop W and nothing; absolutely nothing is gonna happen to you. You're safe with me." He whispered lovingly in your ear. "I swear on my life that I'm gonna stop W, so we can live in peace. I swear."

"I'm scared, Darren." You sobbed and he held you tighter.

"I know, baby. I am too. But nothing is going to happen to us, I swear. You're with me and I will take care of you always. Get it?" He said now looking deeply into your eyes and you nodded.

"Thanks. I promise I'll take care of you too." You answered as fondly as you could in all this mess. He looked at you with bright eyes and a warm smile for a while.

"You're already taking care of me, since the first time I've met you." He said caressing your cheek and then he placed his hand on your towel and lifted it. Oh damn, half of your breasts were showing up, what a shame.

"Oh gosh, that was embarrassing." You said in a whisper, blushing; and he chuckled very softly.

"Don't worry, I didn't see anything." He replied and he wasn't lying because all the time he was looking at you straight into your eyes. "Come on." He said standing up and giving you his hand to help you to stand up. You grabbed with your free hand the towel and finally stood up. "I'll make you a hot chocolate to calm down and moreover we're gonna ask Chuck and Jen if they have heard something."

"Fine. Just give me a minute." You said holding your towel firmly. Darren nodded but he stood there. "I... I want to be alone for a minute." You asked shyly and Darren raised his eyebrows, suddenly feeling awkward.

"Oh yes, yes, sorry." He said quickly, slurring his words. "I'll be in the kitchen, okay?"

"Okay, fine. Thanks." You answered with a slight smile.

When Darren finally left the bathroom and closed the door behind you, you walked to the mirror again, this time checking if there was another trap. Fortunately, there wasn't. You read the message again, very intently. Something popped in your mind, something that scared you, something that made you feel terribly down-hearted, something that shocked you. The color of the lipstick; it was exactly the same that your sister had, and your sister was here, in this house. That couldn't be possible; she could never do that to you, never ever. You threw the towel and quickly you put on some clothes to run as fast as you could to the entrance. You needed to find your sister. When you ran to the entrance, Darren was in the living room with two cups of hot chocolate, next to Chuck and Jen. But you didn't stop to give them any explanation, you just left the house running.

"Freckles! Hey!" You heard Darren yelling, trying to follow you now; but you were being really fast and you couldn't stop. "Freckles, where are you going? Stop right now! Please!" He yelled desperate but his screams were more distant now; you kept running.

You ran and ran, not looking behind, while tears started to stream down your face but dispelled by the speed at which you were running. You were confused, sad, upset, disappointed. The warm wind typical of spring started blowing, it was dark and only few people were around, but you kept running. You didn't hear Darren's screams anymore, he lost you in the way, but you kept running; you kept running despite that your legs were in pain and you barely could breathe. You finally arrived at your old house and you stood there, looking at it. All the lights were off and it was very silent. You couldn't get in, because there was also your father, and you didn't want to see him, not now. But you needed to talk to your sister and you were mad and disconcerted.

"Amanda!" You yelled your lungs out from the street, looking at Amanda's bedroom window. "Amanda!" You yelled even louder.

A lot of lights of the neighboring houses turned on and some people poked their heads out the windows. But Amanda didn't appeared and the light didn't turn on. Your father also didn't appear.

"Amanda! Get out the house!" You yelled your lungs out again, now you knew you were going to become hoarse. Some people began to shut you, but you didn't listen. "AMANDA!"

And finally the light of her bedroom turned on and she poked her face out the window. She was already on her pajamas and she was apparently sleeping, now she was looking at you frowning and bewildered, as if you were crazy. When she saw you, she got inside again. You waited patiently and then you saw how the light of the front yard turned on and, minutes later, Mandy appeared, wearing a long coat.

"Are you insane?" She asked in disbelief while walking to you. "What happened? Have you had a fight with Darren or something?"

You didn't answer at her, you only pounced at her and you threw her to the floor, you getting on top of her to pull her hair. You were carrying away because of your rage, you couldn't control it, you barely knew what you were doing, and you were just a mess. Your sister didn't beat you, but she pulled you away to stop you. When she got it; you attempted to pounce on her over again but she grabbed you by your arms strongly, but careful not to hurt you. You couldn't move so you looked at her in anger and you saw her eyes. She was looking at you puzzled and distressed. Then it was as if everything was tearing apart; as if everything was cold and there was no warm, there was no bright, no sun, no comfort. You started to mourn disconsolately; not only for what you just did, because that there wasn't you; also because Mandy was your sister and maybe she was the one who did all that to you, maybe she was part of the W team, or worse yet, maybe she was W. All this suffering, all these threats, all these concerns, all these shit situation that brought you down; maybe Mandy was the one who caused that. Your own sister. You cried your heart out and your sister hugged you to comfort you. But there was no comfort, not now.

"Why did you do that?" You asked still sobbing.

"Why did I do what?" She asked with cracked voice and in a whisper, confused.

"Why, Mandy? Why do you hate me so much?"

"I don't hate you. Where did you get something like that?" She asked still confused.

"You hate me, you hate me, you hate me. What did I do? Why? How could you? I don't want you to hate me like that." You said still sobbing, trying to say sense things, but you didn't get it.

"Alright." Amanda said firmly and she grabbed you by the arms again to look at you fixedly. "What is going on? What happened? Why are you saying all of that?"

"You're one of them. All this time... You knew it all because you're one of them." You answered in between the tears.

"One of whom?" She asked still flurried.

"Of the W team!" You answered almost yelling shrilly. Amanda raised her eyebrows and looked at you with eyes wide open, completely horrified.

"What did you say?" She asked brokenly, still terrified.

"Do not lie to me, Amanda. Not anymore. I'm sick of lies, of living in this fake reality where nothing is real, nothing is honest, and nothing can be true." You sobbed looking at her intensely.

"I'm not... I swear... I... I'm not one of those..." Mandy said it trembling, looking away and very edgy.

"I just want to know why! Why have you done it to me? Give me an answer; please give me a honest answer for once and all!" You cried while tears wouldn't stop to stream down your face.

"I've never meant to do it. I'm sorry." Mandy answered now also crying.

That was like a knife stabbing your heart. You looked at her with your heart broken. She admitted that she was involved in this macabre game. Your sister, your only sister; the person with whom you shared all your life; was one of the guilty people of your pain and suffering. She was one of the people who made you feel down, who threatened you, who made you feel as if you were worthless; who abused of you both psychologically and physically; she was one of the people who turned your life into a very insufferable and horrid life. Why? You closed your eyes in suffering and tried to stop crying but it was impossible, it hurt way too much.

"Are you W?" You asked weakly, still with your eyes closed and shedding tears.

"No, I'm not." You sister answered sobbing. "I swear I am not."

"Why are you one of them?" You asked again trying to calm and constantly failing. "How does that macabre game work? Are you part of the team of haters? Are you one of the people who want to destroy me? Why are you involved? What is the reason?"

"I'm not one of the haters and I've never wanted to destroy you. I've never wanted to be involved, I've been forced. I swear on my life that I've been forced." Your sister cried even more, now holding your hands. You looked at her heartbrokenly and she was looking at you desperate.

"That's why W knew my phone number... You told it." You said so down that it was unbearable, so unbearable that you were starting to feel nothing and feel cold and heartless. Your sister looked down and it only meant a yes. "You were the one who wrote with a lipstick the mirror of the school bathroom; with your red lipstick. You were the one who got the picture of me, when everybody started calling me pimple face; no one else knew about that picture. You were the one who sent me the bottle of liquor, which the one I got drunk for the first time and made me lose my memory temporally; no one else knew where I lived. It explains why W knew a lot of things about me, like what I was doing, even when I was in my old bedroom. It explains why W knew about my past, about my private feelings, because you read my diary; in which I talked about Darren for example. You were the one who wrote that message in the mirror of Darren's bathroom; you were the one who put there that knife. How could you?" You asked with teary voice, feeling very dejected. Your sister, next to you, was crying uncontrollably.

"I'm sorry, I had no options! Jim forced me!" She cried.

"Sure, you had no options. The only option was to make me go through all the shit I had to go through, the only option was to make me feel so down to the point I was thinking that my whole life was pointless; but you didn't have the option of not doing what Jim was telling you to do. Good." You answered now coldly and faraway.

It was as if nothing could make you suffer more than this; as if now everything was lost and there was nothing. As if you really gave up, as if there was nothing to live for because your own family, your entire family threw you out, your entire family deserted you; you were no one to your family, you've never been part of the family. You were alone and everything else you had was just an illusion, was only something transient because, sooner or later, even Darren was going to desert you as everybody else has done: Your father, your mother, your sister, your only friends Peter and Alexandra. Now you started to feel it: You forgave the point of life; you were feeling empty.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't want to make you feel like that!" She exclaimed desperate.

"You knew I was going to feel like that, but you did it anyway." You answered coldly, with your sight lost. "You could have told me, but you decided not to tell me anything. You could have supported me, but you didn't. You could have warned me if you couldn't talk, but you didn't. You could even have sent me anonymous text messages telling me to not to do certain things if you couldn't talk, but you didn't. You had thousands of ways to help me, but you haven't helped me. That was your decision."

"I was scared."

"I was scared too, Amanda. I was also confused, distressed, hopeless, helpless, lost, lonely, and insecure, discriminated, beaten, threatened; I was also falling apart. But I always tried to keep my few friends and my family safe. And I was broken, but I still tried to do the right thing, to not to hurt anyone. Do not tell me that you couldn't have done it, because I've been worse than you. At least, you've never been bullied. They abused of me, you abused of me, Amanda." You said coldly but shedding tears; it seemed physically impossible that you could keep shedding tears after all the tears you've already shed.

"Please, don't say that." She wept, resting her head on your lap. You stayed steady, feeling insensitive.

"It's the truth." You answered harshly.

"Try to understand me." She begged.

"Why should I try to understand you, if no one ever tried to understand me? I'm sick of trying to make everybody happy while no one cares about me; while I'm still the poor girl that no one wants around. Why should I be always the fool? Why should I be always the girl who cares about everybody? Why should I be the girl who puts in first place others without thinking of herself in the first place? Why? Why others can't do it for me at least once? I also need someone, but no one notices it, no one cares." You said absent and expressionless.

"I do care about you and this went out of my control. They threatened me with a lot of things, please. I begged Jim to stop with this, I told him I didn't want to keep going with this, I told him this was going out of control, that this was too much. I begged him to stop, but he wouldn't listen to me. I've even broken up with him because of this, but things kept going worse and worse. I tried to convince other people involved that this was bad; no one listened. Please, forgive me." She begged weeping, wrapping her arms around your hips, still with her head on your lap.

"I can't." You answered curtly and frivolously.

"Please, forgive me. I'd do whatever you want, please. I love you, sister, I really do."

"Well, then tell me who W is." You said bossy.

"I don't know who W is. Jim was the only one who all the time was forcing me to do things. W identity was never revealed to me." She answered guiltily but honestly.

"Then, the only I want is you to be away from me. I tried to get closer to you several times, it never worked." You said heartless.

"Please, don't. Don't ask me that. I want to be with you, I want to support you, I want to help you now." She cried supplicant now looking at you, but you ignored her.

"It's late. I'm nobody, you wouldn't help a nobody." You answered insensibly.

"You're my sister. And I love you and a lot of people love you, truly love you. You mean a lot to so many people; you aren't a nobody." Your sister said afflicted. "I promise I'll stop doing all the things they tell me to do, no matter what it'll come to happen. I promise to protect you, to stand by you; I promise to help you to find out who W is. Because I realize now that nothing else is important, that you're more important than anything. Please, give me a chance."

"Amanda, I lost my ability to trust on people, to trust on promises."

"Fine, I got it. But at least let me try it, let me show you that you can trust again." She begged firmly and you only looked away serious. "Listen... I've been blinded all this time; I've called you a coward while actually I am the coward one. I've made a lot of mistakes, I've acted as a fool, and I've pulled you away from me. I want to change it, because... You're the only one I care about. This last time we spent together... It helped me to know you more and I realized the kind of person you are, I realized who is worthwhile and who isn't. I know you're the only good thing that happened to me, you were the only one who has really changed me for the better. For the first time, I feel good with myself, and I owe it to you. So please, let me return you all of this. Let me be the sister you always needed. I want to do it. And if you can't forgive me, I understand; if you can't trust me, I understand. But at least let me stand by you, let me love you." She said wiping her tears away and looking deeply into your eyes. In other circumstances, you surely would have forgiven her; but now everything felt different.

"You're free to do whatever you want. You've been always free to do whatever you wanted. But do not expect anything from me, because you won't get it." You replied cold-hearted.

"I won't expect anything from you. You'll see, I'll find out who W is; I'll protect you. Thank you, thank you!" Amanda said desperately and she hugged you tightly. You didn't hug her back.

"I wish everything could be different. I wish you would not have betrayed me." You said coldly as you felt how a tear dropped on your shoulder while Mandy was still hugging you.

"Is that all true?" You heard a voice coming from the distance.

You looked up to see who that person was. Darren was standing not so far from where you were; looking as if he was confused, upset and distressed. Apparently he had been listening to your conversation with Amanda, hiding behind a bush. You just simply looked the other way. You knew that sooner or later, Darren was also going to hurt you. It was part of this cruel humanity. It was what it was meant to you.

While I was waiting for Freckles with the two cups of hot chocolate, I saw her running away without saying anything at all. I asked her what the hell was going on while I was running behind her, but she didn't answer and she didn't stop. She ran so fast that I lost her. I didn't know where she could have gone, but on my way of running to nowhere in particular, I realized something. Before she ran away, she was in the bathroom; she was seeing the message written in the mirror with a red lipstick. It was the same red lipstick that Mandy had. Oh shit. Freckles was running to her house to find Mandy. I don't have a fucking idea why it popped in my mind, how I could have thought all of that in a matter of seconds. But it had sense; so I ran directly to her house. When I arrived at her house, she was there, yelling her lungs out, calling Mandy. I saw that situation puzzled because of its oddness. Hours ago they were getting along so very well and now she was yelling at her sister as if she was really furious. I thought that the best idea was to hide behind something, so I could hear what was happening without interrupting them. Mandy reached Freckles and I saw how Freckles pounced on her sister to pull her hair. What the fuck? That wasn't Freckles; Freckles wasn't a violent person. I was about to stop that fight, but Mandy stopped her quickly, so I stayed there. And then they started to dispute about something I couldn't get because Freckles was asking nonsense things. Until I heard it:

"You're one of them. All this time... You knew it all because you're one of them." Freckles said crying.

"One of whom?" Mandy asked terrified.

"Of the W team!" Freckles yelled and Mandy freaked out.

Oh damn shit. Mandy was involved on this all this time and I've never suspected it. Maybe that was the reason why she, all of a sudden, was interested on me. That was why she wanted me, not because she had feelings for me but because she wanted to get information of me. I also remembered the conversation that Mandy and Jim had once, when Jim and Brian hit me that time, one of the first days of school...

"I'm out of this. We agreed you wouldn't hurt her!" Mandy yelled.

"I thought you hated her." Jim answered frivolously.

"Well yes I do. But this was too much, Jim. You could have killed her." Mandy yelled again angrily.

"Well, that bitch deserved it. She pounced on me. I hit her like a boss." Jim said proud of himself.

"Yeah, Jim! How rude you are for hitting a girl younger than you!" Mandy exclaimed sarcastically. "I'm out of this shit, don't count on me anymore."

Oh fuck. Mandy was definitely involved on this game of W. How could she? And Mandy was admitting Freckles that she was one of them. I heard the entire conversation and it was heartbreaking. What really broke my heart was what Freckles said...

I knew that kind of voice because I heard it on Jen when she lost her brother. She couldn't find the point of life anymore. I wanted to go running to her and hold her, I wanted to comfort her, I wanted to make her smile. But I stayed there, still hearing their conversation. Then, another thing that Freckles said broke my heart...

"I do care about you, I notice it, I want to be there for you; I love you." I wanted to say to her, but I stayed silent, still hiding.

Amanda was desperate and she seemed to be honest, she was suffering this situation. But she betrayed Freckles, she was one of the people who hurt my Freckles; she was one of the people who hurt us, who helped to make everything hard and miserable, who threatened us. I was very disappointed of Amanda. Freckles, on the other hand, was being cruel and cold-hearted; she wasn't Freckles, she was a hopeless person who was tired of suffering, therefore she was being insensitive. Her words were very piercing and intense, so sad.

"It's late. I'm nobody, you wouldn't help a nobody." Freckles said insensibly. A nobody? How the hell would she think that she is a nobody? It wasn't like that, not at all.

"You're my sister. And I love you and a lot of people love you, truly love you. You mean a lot to so many people; you aren't a nobody." It was one wise thing that Amanda finally said.

"I wish everything could be different. I wish you would not have betrayed me." Freckles said coldly.

I couldn't stand it anymore. Freckles wasn't fine, I could totally notice it. She needed me. And Amanda... I still couldn't believe that she was able to do such a terrible thing.

"Is that all true?" I asked walking to them, still very puzzled.

"Darren, this is not a good moment. This is something only between my sister and me." Amanda answered but not harshly. I looked at Freckles, she was looking away with a blankly expression that was hurtful to see.

"You see, this involves me too, and it involves Jen. It involves all the people that W hurt. So I do think I'm on my right to ask and stay here." I answered firmly looking at Amanda and then I looked at Freckles again. "Besides, my girlfriend isn't fine and I want to be here with her, I want to comfort her and just hold her in this moment."

Amanda looked down knowing that I was right and she smiled slightly. She moved away from Freckles and Freckles didn't even look at me when I sat next to her, she didn't look at me when I held her hand and I wrapped an arm around her; she didn't smiled, she didn't look, she didn't move. This was hurtful and confusing.

"Are you feeling fine, baby?" I whispered warmly in her ear and she simply shrugged without saying anything at all.

"I'm sorry, guys. I really am. I've done a lot of stupid things." Amanda suddenly said and I looked at her serious. Freckles didn't look at her, she seemed to be faraway.

"Yes, you have." I answered but not as coldly as Freckles has been answering her. "Freckles already said it all, I've been listening your conversation since the beginning. This went out of control and you and that team hurt a lot of people in a way you can't even picture. You and that team have been very rough and cruel, you all have threatened with terrible things and it's not easy to forgive it."

"I know..." Mandy said with teary voice, looking down apparently feeling very regretted.

"You need to understand that it's not that we don't want to forgive you; it's just that it was such the pain caused that we'll need time to honestly forgive it. It's not easy for me, I can't imagine how hard is for Freckles, who has taken the worse part." I said frankly and Mandy just kept looking down.

She really has changed for the better, I knew that she wanted to be a better person now; but it was just hard for us. I got distracted when Mandy's phone buzzed.

"Look! Look what I recently received." Mandy said hurriedly, showing us her phone.

I looked at her frowning like 'what the hell are you doing'; she kneeled in front of me and Freckles and gave us her phone. I was suspicious, but I grabbed it and I started reading the text message with Freckles. Of course, it was from W.

"Seriously, Mandy? Are you switching to their team now? You know it's not the best option, you know who's gonna win. With them you're going straight to the doom; you're gonna lose your popularity and you're gonna be a loser like 'em. And remember that your scholarship for college so longed with much effort, is in game. Say goodbye to it and all the good things you have. -W-"

I finished reading the text message and I looked at Mandy. She was looking down, apparently feeling troubled. When she looked up to me, I could see the same scary eyes with which Freckles was used to look at me when she received one of those text messages; it was a kind of look like wanting some kind of support and help, a kind of look that meant that she needed someone to tell her that she was going to take the right decision. Freckles, over again, didn't say anything. Something was happening to her. Well, this was a weird situation... Maybe Mandy also has been receiving threatening text messages from W like this one, maybe that's why she did all she has done, right as she has told us. And W was threatening her with her scholarship for college and that wasn't good, I knew how hard was to get a scholarship, so it wasn't something with which you could play. Maybe Freckles couldn't understand it yet because she was a sophomore; maybe that was why she couldn't understand the decisions that Mandy has taken. Yeah, what Mandy has done wasn't good and she has been cruel with her little sister; but there was a reason and at least it was easier to forgive her now that I knew which the reasons of having done what she has done were.

"What are you gonna do?" I asked looking at Mandy. I noticed how Mandy gulped and felt nervous.

"I'm gonna stay with my sister. If I can't get my scholarship, I don't care; I'll get a job to pay for it. I'd rather to do it than to see how they hurt my sister. I've learned from my mistakes." She answered firmly but still with that kind of look that I knew from Freckles.

I smiled slightly and I nodded and I noticed how she felt a bit better. Mandy received another text message and this time, we all read it at the same time. Of course, again from W.

"Stupid girl. Now for this stupid decision you have just taken, now your future for all your life is not gonna be as you've always dreamed. You wanted to be a fashion designer? Now you're just gonna be a poor enslaved housemaid, watching how the rich people, for whom you work for, are gonna waste money on less important things than those you need. You're entering into a life full of misery and suffering. And you know? You'd never be the person you've always dreamed of, you'd never get the job you always wanted, you'd never have real friends, and you'd never find a person to love and be loved. You're just an idiot and geek girl now. -W-"

I knew that for Mandy this was too much to hold; because all her life she has always been the popular and pretty girl, surrounded by tons of friends and lovers; she was the kind of girl who always has got what she wanted; she's never been humiliated or bullied, she's never been left beside, she's never been ignored and treated like crap. So it was weird that someone was treating her like this now; surely it was going to be hard for her to start this new kind of life in high school, to be in this new status of popularity in school: the losers' team. She was looking away, frowning and distressed. She was feeling bad but she didn't want us to notice it; it was noticeable that she wanted to seem strong for us.

"You know, Mandy? This is bullshit. W, whoever this person is, actually can't do anything to ruin your future. Those are just threats, are just mean words to scare you. But you're the only one who can decide about your own future. If you want to be a fashion designer, then you'll get it. W can't do anything to screw it, to screw your dreams; because in fact, everything is up to you. W is just trying to let you down, so that way you won't fight for what you want because you'd think that is worthless the effort. That's how W works." I said softly, trying to sound convinced of my words, even if I wasn't.

"I guess." She smiled sadly, looking down. "These words won't change my mind, though. I'm sure of this decision I'm taking."

"That's the attitude. You need to feel self-confident and then W won't be able to hurt you; because you know you're doing what is right." I said smiling friendly, even though the situation was tense. Freckles, still, wasn't saying anything at all. She was absent. Then it was my phone the one that buzzed.

"Telling lies to the new member of your team? Bad boy. Oh, by the way, Criss... Have you noticed that your parents haven't arrived yet? Haven't you wondered which the reason can be? I don't know if you remember what I told you about your mommy on Sundays... If I were you, I'd be very worried. -W-"

I finished reading the text message and I put it aside, trying to pretend that it wasn't anything serious. Freckles and Mandy haven't read it and I didn't want them to know. I needed to seem I was fine, that nothing wrong could happen. But inside, I was freaking out, I was very worried and edgy. Yes, it was in fact odd that my parents haven't arrived yet at home without telling us anything. But I didn't want to think about bad things and now, thanks to W, I was thinking very bad things. W had macabre ideas and plans, so I couldn't be sure of anything; I had no idea what could be happening. What if W found my parents and hurt them? What if they had an accident caused by W? What if they had been stolen or something? I wanted to come back home, I wanted to call my parents and get an answer from them; but they weren't taking the calls. But besides, I also needed to talk to Freckles because she was acting in a very eerie way and I didn't like seeing her that way. In silence and trying my best to seem calm; I texted Chuck.

To Chuck: Hey bro... Are already mom and dad at home?

From Chuck: Nope. And they keep ignoring my calls. Maybe they extended their date.

To Chuck: Yeah, keep calling them. This is weird.

From Chuck: Will do. I'll tell you if they take the call or if they arrive. But come back home soon.

I looked away very concerned and thinking about which were the chances that my parents could have had an accident caused by W. No, I didn't want to think about it. I was literally freaking out and I couldn't hide it.

"What's going on? Is everything alright?" Mandy asked looking at me frowning.

"Yes, everything is fine... I just... My brother texted me, that's all." I lied not because I wanted to, but because it was the best to say in this tense moment. Of course, my phone buzzed again.

"Still telling lies, Criss? Huh no, bad done, little liar. The truth will out. -W-"

Fuck you, W. I thought in my mind. I was sick of these threats, of these text messages, of living all the time worried, of trying to pretend I was fine when nothing was fine. Mandy' phone buzzed now and when she saw from who it was, she showed that text message to us.

"Ask the little liar called Criss what the truth of what is happening is... You see, they're all liars. You mean nothing to them, that's why they won't tell you a damn shit. Not even they want to be your real friends, slut. -W-"

"Uhm... It's not that you mean nothing to us, it's not like that. It's just something private." I answered edgy, looking away.

"You don't have to tell me, is okay. I know how this game is, so don't worry." Mandy replied comprehensively.

Then Freckles' phone buzzed like three times and both Mandy and I looked at her, expectant to know who it was and what it said. But she read it alone, serious and when she finished reading it, she threw her phone away in a fit of rage. We looked at her perplexed and she remained serious and blankly again, looking away, without giving us any kind of explanation. Mandy and I exchanged a suspicious gaze and then we looked at Freckles again.

"Who was it, baby?" I asked gingerly.

"No one." She answered coldly, still avoiding my gaze as she has been doing all this time.

"Was it W?" I asked again, insistent.

"It doesn't matter. Nothing matters." She answered harshly.

"It does matter. We're together on this, remember? Baby, what did it say?" I asked insistent and finally she looked at me. But I wasn't expecting that kind of look full of anger. Why was she looking at me that way?

"I'm sick of having to explain everything all the time; I'm sick of receiving stupid threatening text messages; I'm sick of hearing the phrase 'hey, we're together on this' and shit like that. I know it's not like that, so please, stop annoying me with questions I don't feel like answering. Respect that." She said almost yelling in a very harsh and cold way, still looking at me furious.

Oh man, what the hell? What was this all about? Why was she suddenly so angry, so pessimistic about life and all? Hours ago she was still the cute and simple Freckles that I was holding in my arms to comfort her. I looked at her confused and completely bemused, also feeling afflicted because her rude words kinda hurt me. I just couldn't get why she was being like that with me if, as far as I knew, I didn't do anything bad to her. I noticed how Mandy, next to me, looked down also afflicted and confused. Freckles looked away again with the blankly expression. Something really bad was happening to her and I needed to know; so I stood up in silence to grab her phone and read the text messages she has recently received. Yes, those were indeed from W. I read them and I understood why Freckles was so upset.

"Everything is going as I've planned. You're going right to your own destruction: An ugly and geek bitch with no house, no family, no friends, no hopes, no goals, and no love; with nothing. How does it feel to be absolutely empty? -W-"

"Look at yourself... You can't even know who you are and why you are there. You don't fit anywhere and with anybody. Are you sure that your life has sense now? -W-"

I read those awful text messages and I felt really mad. But the worst text message was the last one. I had no words to explain all I felt when I read it. I only know that I felt a mix of anger, disbelief, impotence, heartache, desperation, nervousness, perturbation, bitterness and a big grief. I didn't know that a human being could ever feel all of that at the same time; but yeah, it was possible. That text message was just so heartbreaking and so untrue; so morbid, insensitive, inhumane; so... ruthless. And false, everything was a huge lie. And more than a text message it seemed a letter, a perverse and grim letter.

"Your sister lies. She helped to destroy you and now she's saying that she wants to be with you, but she didn't do it when she had the chance. Criss lies. He told you that you're the love of his life and that he trusts on you, but he didn't believe you when he had the chance, he chose to hide behind a bush when you were arguing with your sister instead comforting you as any other real boyfriend would have done. Criss said that he wants to share everything with you, but he hasn't shared with you what was happening lately. Jennifer lies. She told you that you could trust on her, but when you confessed her your love for Darren, she told him so. Charles lies. He told you that being different is good, but he didn't tell you that is impossible to do because he preferred you to suffer it. Your father lies. He told you were his little and best daughter, but he always loved more your sister than you, he kicked you out heartless. Your mother lies. She told you that she was going to take care of you always, but she's never in home when you need her. Your teachers lie. They told you that you're the smartest girl in school, but they didn't tell you that they're about to expel you from school because your degrees and your behavior got worse lately. You should really think if the people you have next to you really care and love you or if they're pretending it for pity. You should really think if you're worthy or you're just a nobody walking around lonely and miserable. You should consider your existence in this world, for your own good. -W-"

W really had no heart. I looked at Freckles very anguished; she was still looking away blankly. I was feeling so bad, I was feeling a hole in my heart even though that text message wasn't for me; but it was for my girlfriend and whatever hurts her, it hurt me as well. And W was inducing her to the worst, that person was inducing her to commit suicide. How could any human being be so fucking ghoulish? I left her phone on the grass again and I walked to Freckles, as Mandy grabbed Freckles' phone to read the text messages, because she got scared when she saw my terrified face. I kneeled next to Freckles and I held her hands in silence; she still avoided my gaze.

"All of that... It's not true." I whispered glum. "We don't feel pity for you; we really love you and care. Your life is worthy and you are worthy. Yes, we all have made mistakes because we're human beings. Yes, surely we also hurt you on so many ways, but I'm sure when I say that it wasn't intentional. For all the bad things we've done, for all the bad decisions we have made, for all the pain caused... We never meant that. All of that doesn't mean that we don't love you, because we really do; because you let us to see your real you, your magic and your everything. We know you, W doesn't know you, and so that person can't opine what the best for you is. We can, you can; and what I think, as your boyfriend who loves you madly, is that the best for you is to keep being happy as you are when you're yourself. What I think is that you're the most magnificent person I've ever met and I wish nobody could make you think or feel the opposite. You're beloved." I said with teary voice and eyes full of tears, trying to look deeply into her eyes, even though she wasn't looking at me. But Freckles still had the blankly expression, as if she hasn't listened to me at all.

"Yes, I am. That's why the only friends I had betrayed me; that's why everybody in school calls me in a derogatory way; that's why my mother is never here when I need a little mother love; that's why my own father told me awful things and kicked me out without caring if I had a place to go or not; that's why my own sister didn't care that I was falling apart; that's why people hit me, bullied me, cursed at me, made fun of me, and ignored me. That's why I'm beloved. That's why I don't have a family, I don't have friends, and I don't have a home. That's why even you, sooner or later, are gonna walk away from me. Someday, you're gonna do what everybody else has done. And I'd rather to avoid that moment from now than to later suffer it, when it's already too late." She said insensitive, with a poker face.

Was she really feeling anything at all? What would she mean with those words? Why would she have that attitude? What would she be actually thinking and feeling? Unlike other times, she wasn't letting me to notice it; because she was being expressionless and distant. This was even worse than when she was mad at me, because at least those times I knew what she was feeling.

"Will not do that. I won't walk away from you." I answered frowning and kind of distressed; because I couldn't get how she could be thinking something like that if I already told her what she meant to me. "I love you, I'm not one of those guys who say that and don't mean it. It took me a long time to admit it to you, but I'm sure that those words aren't simply words; that is what I truly feel for you." I answered looking into her eyes, still feeling that distress in my chest as she was looking at me expressionless. "And you do have real friends who love you: you have Jen and Chuck; you also have me, because besides being my love, you're also my best friend. You have a family: you have your sister who has made a lot of mistakes but is trying hard now to show you that you're important to her; you also have my family who loves you as if you were one more of us. You do have a home: my home is your home; and that's only a tangible home, because besides you have another home, intangible, here in my heart." I said placing my hand on my heart, still looking at her intensely. Her lack of expression was hurting me. "And if people have hurt you, have hit you, have made fun of you, have bullied you, have ignored you; it's because they can't appreciate the kind of person that you are, but they're the fool ones who are losing the chance to meet a person as extraordinary as you are." I said with all honesty, holding her hands now. "I do understand that you can't see it because of that stupid and untrue text message you've received; but I'm telling you that it's like that."

"You can't understand me because you've never had to go through the things I had to. You'll never understand me, you don't have a fucking idea how it feels because you've never felt it." She answered coldly and it was desperate.

"Maybe I haven't had to go through the things you had to. Maybe I haven't felt what you exactly are feeling. But I've been hurt too on so many ways, so I'm familiarized with the feeling. Maybe different things have hurt us, but the feeling of being lost and lonely is exactly the same." I said kindly, trying to find out how she was feeling, but constantly failing. "I promise that I'll do as possible to not to let that someone hurt you; I'll do as possible to show you that I'm a guy who's gonna hug you while you're feeling down, who's gonna give you a hand when you need help, who's gonna give you a shoulder to lean on and cry, a guy who's gonna celebrate with you all your victories and accompany you in all your defeats. I will do as possible to show you that I'm the guy who wants to share your laughs and crying. I'm the guy who wants to steal you a smile to witness how the world suddenly lights up. I'm the guy who would do everything to cheer you up, to see you getting better. And all that because I love you, because I really do and it's not false as that text message." I said with teary eyes as she looked at me. This time, her eyes brightened and I could notice it; only that she still wasn't as same as before.

"You inspire love, Darren." She said looking into my eyes and I smiled warmly at her. "And to be totally, completely and absolutely in love, must be fully aware that one is also loved, that oneself also inspires love." She said with soft voice and I was looking at her, trying to get what her point was. "And I don't feel like that. I don't feel loved and less I feel that I inspire love." She said now looking at her lap; finally I was noticing her emotions: she was anguished. "You say you love me, it may be true, I don't know. What I know is that you can't love a girl who isn't even able to love herself." She said with cracked voice and I was looking at her confused. I wasn't getting this. "So that's why I think, I really think that we shouldn't be together." She said now looking at me straight in the eye. I looked at her for a long time in silence, still confused but feeling a pressure in my chest, as panic.

"What does it mean?" I asked really confused and distressed, frowning.

"A break up." She answered curtly.

And those words stabbed my heart. I looked at her agape, terrified and fully heartbroken. I looked fixedly into her eyes not wanting to accept what I just heard, I couldn't get it. I felt a hole in my heart, I felt a pressure in my chest, and I felt cold. Why was she doing that? Why was she saying those things? Why did she want it? I couldn't get it, I couldn't take it. I looked at her for a long time in silence because the lump on my throat wouldn't let me speak; I was in shock. Do not cry, Darren Everett Criss, do not cry in front of her. I repeated in my mind persistently. She's only confused, she's only feeling bad now, it'll pass; just do not cry, Darren Everett Criss. But it was too much to hold back. I had to look down because her eyes were like killing me, her seriousness was killing me. I tried to turn my face so she wouldn't notice that tears started to stream down my face uncontrollably.

"Do not do that." Mandy finally said, firmly and serious. But I couldn't look at her; I needed to go away because my tears wouldn't stop falling down. "Do not let go the guy who loves you a lot and who you love, only because a person who doesn't know you is confusing you. Do not hurt the ones who love you because of someone you have no idea how is personally." Mandy said desperate.

"People can hurt me but I can't hurt anyone? How is that?" Freckles asked kind of mad and in disbelief. She wasn't being the Freckles I knew. Why was she acting like that? I just wanted to understand her. Her words were just piercing my heart.

"Actually, you can hurt all the people you want if you want. You can hurt me, you can hurt Darren, you can hurt your friends, your peers, the neighbor's dog; and you also can hurt yourself. You're free to hurt people. Do it, if you want." Amanda answered as if she was indifferent and I noticed how her words made Freckles frown in confusion. "But I'll tell you what you're gonna feel, because I felt it, because I've done it." Mandy said firmly and Freckles looked at her intently. "At first you'll feel so brave and superior, superb and mighty. You'll feel the world in your hands." Mandy said smiling but then she got serious again, raising an eyebrow, smiling bitterly. "But with time, you'll realize that it was the opposite; you don't have the world in your hands, you have crushed the world in your hands with yourself in it. You aren't brave, you're a coward. You aren't mighty, you're weak. You aren't superior, you're disgusting. You aren't superb, you're an idiot." She said disgusted and bitterly while Freckles was still looking at her intently. I was trying to listen to her, but I was still feeling really bad. "Because hurting people leads you nowhere. What's the point of hurting people? What would you get if not hate and suffering? As human beings, we're constantly hurting people, sometimes it isn't intentional, sometimes we don't notice it. It's part of being a human being; it's impossible not to hurt anybody. You know why?" She asked looking fixedly at her sister and Freckles shook her head. She was very serious. "Because we constantly have to make decisions, and with every decision we make, we hurt someone; not because we wanted it, but because you can't please everybody. It's not bad, it's not mean; it's part of our nature. Do you really think that you've never ever hurt anyone?" Amanda asked rhetorically and Freckles looked at her kind of annoyed and then she shrugged. "Well, you did; a lot of times. Of course it wasn't intentionally. What is bad is when you're aware that you're hurting someone, when you want it. Because there's something vicious on it, something that it's an empty feeling, something that only makes you a bad person, that makes you feel bad emotions." Amanda said now in disgust and very bitterly, apparently she was thoughtful, because she was frowning. "And at the end, you end up being the hurt one, not the person you hurt. Because at least the person you hurt has someone to lean on; but the other person, the person who caused pain in another one, that person doesn't have anyone, that person is alone, because everybody, sooner or later, realizes that that person isn't good." Mandy said firmly and wisely. Her eyes were shinning as if she wanted to cry, but she didn't. Freckles, on the other hand, was looking down. "So you can hurt Darren, the guy who's giving you everything of him; but now you're aware of all you'll cause and all you'll feel."

What Amanda said surprised me, I never thought she could have this sensitive way and she said it very wisely. Freckles stayed silent and I wiped my tears away while I tried to calm before looking at Freckles again. She was already looking at me, now she was serious but there was something else. I looked at her intensely, still feeling very heartbroken. When I looked into her beautiful eyes I felt even worse. Those eyes were used to look at me in a loving way and now those eyes were looking at me in gloomy way. We stared into each other's eyes for a long time and no one spoke. Her words 'a break up' popped in my mind again and I couldn't help it but shed a tear. She looked down as soon as she saw it. Dammit, I didn't want to do it in front of her. Fuck, I really needed to get away now, awful tears were coming again. You're a boy; do not cry in front of girls, Everett. I repeated in my mind.

"I feel bad." Freckles suddenly said in a whisper. "I don't want to try it anymore. I don't understand why this is happening to me. I try and try but things get worse and worse and I just don't want it anymore. People hate me and people who still care about me will soon walk away as everything in my life. I'm tired of trying, I'm tired of feeling letdown, I'm tired of being misplaced and mistreated, I'm tired of being underestimated and hated. I'm tired of waking up every day and have false hopes that everything is gonna get better but actually it doesn't." Freckles said finally showing her real feelings. She was sorrowful that it was hurtful. I only looked at her sadly but she never looked at me. "I only want to completely disappear." She whispered gloomy, shedding a tear in silence.

"You know? As years pass by, the bullying and the youth suicide increase insanely in America; and not only in America, also all around the world. So you see, you're not the first one to feel like this because of bullying; and you're not gonna be the last one." Amanda said after a while, kneeling next to her sister, right in front of me.

"What are you saying? That because other kids are going through the same situation than me, I'm not allowed to feel bad?" Freckles asked in disbelief, frowning at her sister.

"No, I'm not saying that." Amanda denied quickly. "I'm saying that you aren't alone. There are a lot of people who feel the same; some of them, sadly, have committed suicide; but others could keep going because they could found their real purpose in life; because they've learned how to love themselves, they finally figured out that people who hurt them, are not worthy; so they kept going." Mandy said looking at Freckles deeply into her eyes while Freckles was looking at Mandy with teary eyes. "Now it's up to you to decide which way you'd take. No one is gonna force you, but you should know that, even though you can't see it, a lot of people will suffer if we lose you. Including me, including Darren." Amanda said with tears in her eyes, still looking at Freckles straight in her eye. I also looked deeply into her eyes. Amanda was managing this situation and I was very thankful because I couldn't talk.

"I don't know how to make it. I don't know how to keep going, I can't find the way." Freckles said desperate with teary voice. I was still hurt because of her words, but more hurtful was to hear her saying that so desperately.

"Start over again." Mandy answered with a fond smile. "Even if you feel tired. Even if the victory abandons you. Even if a mistake hurts you. Even if a business is bankrupt. Even if a betrayal hurts you. Even if a hope fades. Even if the pain burns your eyes. Even if people ignore your effort. Even if the ingratitude is the payment. Even if the incomprehension shuts off your laugh. Even if everything seems nothing. Start over again." She said so wonderfully that made Freckles cry, this time because of her thrill. "Because starting over again is not about come unstuck. Starting over again is about to give yourself a new chance, to resume dreams, to fight for that you want, to be true to yourself and search the happiness. So don't be afraid to start over again because each day is a new chance." Mandy said sweetly, holding her sister's hands. "Remember that it doesn't matter how hard the fall is, just get up and show the world that it doesn't matter how strong the beat is, it's not the strong enough to stop you."

Whoa, what Mandy was saying was truly inspirational; I could have never said something as beautiful as her. And the most important is that Freckles got it, that Amanda has touched Freckles' heart, something I couldn't get to do. The two sisters hugged each other in a warm and comforting hug for a very long time. I was glad to see that, but however I was also feeling bad because it was as if I were invisible to them. No one of them realized I was still there. I had to look away again to hold back the awful tears and then my phone buzzed.

"How does it feel to have been dumped by the geek girl? How does it feel to be left beside? How does it feel to be worried about your parents and whatever happened to them and at the same time be broken because the girl you love doesn't want you, a stupid and naive guy? Sad, isn't it? I feel pity for you, Criss, my condolences. -W-"

Oh man, awful tears again, I couldn't help it; I was feeling very sensitive as a little kid. I just couldn't stay there and cry in front of them, I needed to go away, at least to hide until I could be calmed. I needed to find a good excuse. I stood up and I attempted to leave in silence, maybe they weren't going to notice it. But unfortunately, Mandy did.

"Where are you going, Darren?" She asked curious.

"Uhm... I'm just... Chuck texted me, we need to talk so... I was just... I was going to..." I started babbling very nervous. I really didn't know what to say and the lump in my throat barely was letting me to speak.

"You need privacy, I get it. Alright, just go. We'll be here." Mandy said smiling friendly and I nodded like a jerk.

Before turning around, I glanced at Freckles, who was looking away. With a bad feeling in my heart I walked away from there as fast as I could. I pulled out my phone to pretend I was talking to Chuck until I hid behind the same bush than earlier. I let my body drop in the grass and I held my legs as I rested my head on my knees to start crying all the tears I truly wanted to cry since Freckles broke up with me. I cried a lot but in silence because I didn't want the sisters to hear me crying. It was one of the most heartrending crying I've ever cried. I never thought that a break up could be as painful as it was being. Why was this happening? Why? Why couldn't I be with her? Why couldn't I make her happy? Why couldn't she just take my love? I needed her; I just couldn't be without her. Like I fool I imagined my life with her, and now it was only an illusion. All of my dreams with her were breaking into pieces, fading away and I just didn't know how to hold those pieces. It was awful, it was an awful feeling and I couldn't stop crying; I was aware that I needed to stop, but I simply couldn't. While I was still crying, I felt something heavy hitting my head and I felt how my entire body weakened until I couldn't move, until I couldn't see anything, until I lost consciousness.

You were really hurt for what your sister had done, but then she told you very inspiring things that made you change your mind. This time W got to make you feel things that you haven't felt before and when your sister talked to you with reasonableness, you realized how wrong the things that W made you think were. If it weren't for your sister, you surely would have done something stupid. Actually, you did something stupid. You made Darren feel miserable and he didn't deserve it. You told him rude things and his beautiful hazel eyes were so sad that you could notice that you broke his heart. And it was worse when you broke up with him; his look destroyed your heart, but you hid it. You didn't know why you did it if you were sure that you loved him. But everything was because of W' fault.

"Where is Darren?" You suddenly asked.

"I don't know, he said he had to talk to his brother." Mandy answered shrugging.

"I know, but it's been a long time already." You said frowning and your sister nodded, also frowning. "Have you seen which way he walked?"

"Yeah, he went behind that bush." Mandy answered and you stood up quickly.

"I'll look for him. It's late and we need to get some sleep, tomorrow we have to go to school." You said quietly and your sister nodded in agreement.

You walked alone to the bush, but you didn't find Darren there. You walked around there to see if he was near there, but he wasn't there. Anyway, you kept walking until you were already far from your old house. He couldn't have walked so away from there. But there was no signal of him anywhere. Maybe he decided to come back to his house, but he didn't tell you anything, he didn't even text you. Maybe because he was mad at you. No, but it wasn't possible, that attitude wasn't typical of Darren; no matter how mad he could be at you, he'd always advise you if he was leaving. You checked your phone to see if Darren has texted you, but there was nothing. You came back to where Mandy was and you looked at her frowning.

"He isn't anywhere. I looked for him all around, but he isn't here. Has he texted you or something?" You asked suspiciously.

"No, he hasn't." Amanda answered, shaking her head. "Maybe he just came back to his house."

"I don't think so; he'd have told me." You said thoughtful and now concerned.

"Well, maybe he was feeling bad and wanted to come back and he forgot to notify you." Mandy answered shrugging.

"No, Darren is not like that, Mandy." You said concerned. "I'll call him, give me a minute."

Your sister nodded again and you called him. Voicemail. Oh well, that was too weird. His phone always was turned on and, besides, supposedly, he has been talking to his brother. Maybe it was only a chance, so you called him again. Over again, voicemail.

"He wouldn't take my calls." You said frowning and concerned.

"Give him time. He didn't seem to be doing fine." Amanda replied softly. That was all because of your fault. If only you could find him to apologize... "Have you really meant it?" Your sister suddenly asked.

"What?"

"The break up." She said looking at you as you looked down.

"No." You answered honestly. "I don't know why I've done it, I was just a mess. I do love him, Mandy."

"Yeah, I know. But when you said it all... I don't know, it just sounded so real, as if that was what you truly wanted." Mandy said frowning. "Is good to know that you didn't mean it, that boy really loves you and he's a good guy. Not every guy would say the things he said to you; trust me; it's me the one who's saying this. I have experience with guys."

"Yeah, I know..." You said looking down, feeling guilty.

"Hey, why are you so down?" Mandy asked, lifting your chin.

"I don't know... He didn't deserve to hear all the rude things I said. I don't know if he could... forgive me." You said again looking down and your sister caressed your hair.

"He's gonna forgive you. Because he loves you, he understands you in a way nobody else does." Mandy said sweetly.

"But I hurt him. And I feel exactly as you described how I was going to feel." You said feeling more than guilty now.

"But you regret it, and I know it wasn't your intention to hurt him; it was only because you're a mess now." Mandy said and you shook your head.

"No, the worse thing is that I meant to hurt him in that moment." You admitted feeling awful, now shedding tears. "I feel horrible!"

"Hey, well..." You sister said kind of nervous. You knew she didn't know what to say now. "Sometimes we mean to hurt people not because we're mean, but because is like a method of self-defense and self-protection from others when we feel defenseless and scared. I know that is what happened to you. If you explain him that, he's gonna forgive you, I'm sure."

"I don't know! I wish I could go back in time to never have said that. I just don't wanna lose him, he's... He's the one who always was there for me and the one who made me feel really loved for the very first time, Mandy!" You said crying.

"I know, I know..." Your sister said hugging you and rubbing your back to reassure you. "I'm gonna tell you a little secret..." Mandy whispered and you looked at her intrigued, wiping your tears away. "Darren and I once talked about you; and when he was talking about you, he didn't need to tell me anything to realize that you're everything for him." She said smiling fondly and you smiled slightly. "You see, not only you feel that for him, he also feels the same for you. And in high school is hard to find a boy who can love you for who you are and not for how you look; even harder is to find someone who wants to start something serious with you and not only to hook up. That's why you two are so special together. That's why I know you're gonna last, so don't worry, little sis."

"Thanks." You said smiling shyly but kindly as your sister smiled fondly.

"It's beautiful to see my little sister so in love with a good guy." She admitted with such honesty that was hard to believe.

Before you could answer her something, your phone buzzed and you looked at it desperately. Maybe it was Darren and it was to tell you where he was; you needed to know where he was because you needed to talk to him, you needed to apologize, you needed to tell him that he was your love and you wanted him forever. But it wasn't Darren.

"I think there has been already so much drama and I don't like it. I like games and have fun so... why don't we play hide and seek? -W-"

You read that text message and at first you felt disappointed because it wasn't Darren, but then you started to suspect about this. This was the first text message from W that wasn't aggressive and that was weird. Why would W want to play hide and seek?

"Oh, sorry! I didn't tell you who you have to find! Well, easy... Your ex-boyfriend has disappeared, hasn't he? Go and look for him! -W-"

After you read that text message you looked at Amanda, confused, suspiciously and frowning. As soon as your sister noticed your face, she looked at you concerned and took your phone to read the text messages.

"This is not good." Mandy said very worried, now looking around.

"Why not? Do you know what's happening?" You asked suspiciously.

"Yes, if we don't find Darren now, they're gonna get him. Come on, hurry up; we must find him!" You sister said very edgy and grabbed your hand to start running.

You barely knew what was happening, but you ran with your sister who was leading you to a place you didn't know. You didn't even know if she knew where you two were going, but she kept screaming Darren's name persistently. You were feeling very scared and worried. Did it really mean that they could like... kidnap Darren? Oh no, for god's sake! You really needed to find him, then. So you also started screaming his name. But you couldn't hear any kind of Darren's response; you didn't hear his voice in any moment and he didn't appear. Where could he be? Everything was very dark and it was hard to see. This night seemed to be a horrible night, like in a horror movie. All the sounds, all the shadows, everything was scary and Darren wasn't appearing. Then, your phone buzzed again. You and your sister stopped to read the text message.

"You can't find him? Oh, c'mon! I'll give you a clue so you'll find him faster. Is not so hard to guess! -W-"

And with the text message there was a picture of some empty place. Both you and your sister recognized that place. It was the Golden Gate Park, in the Spreckels Lake. Mandy grabbed your hand and you both run to there as fast as you could. How could has Darren gone there if that place wasn't near your old house? It had no sense. While you were still running, your phone buzzed once again.

"Hurried to find him? Don't worry; he's sleeping as a baby. We've got him and apparently he wants to swim in the lake. He deserves to have fun, don't you think? -W-"

And with that, W sent you a picture that made you feel completely terrified. Darren was there unconscious and very pale; his feet were already in the lake. In his chest there was a sign that spelled 'Goodbye, cruel world'. This wasn't happening, they couldn't have gotten him; there was no way that W could throw him to the lake while he was unconscious; W wouldn't be able to... kill a person. Oh god, no, you didn't want to think about it. You needed Darren, you needed to get him back, you needed to save him from that monster that W was. You needed to keep him safe as you've always promised. You kept running while tears were falling down your face. Of course you didn't show Mandy the text message or she surely would have freaked out. When you arrived to Spreckels Lake, you and your sister looked all around to find Darren.

"He's near the lake, Mandy! Come on, please, let's find him!" You said still crying, very edgy and desperate.

You ran through the paved walkway around the entire edge of the lake. You couldn't find him, he wasn't there yet... Surely W took him somewhere else. You and Amanda started screaming his name again, but he didn't answer. Of course, he was unconscious. But you didn't care, you kept screaming until you saw it... Darren's body was floating in the middle of the lake. You screamed terrified as never before and Mandy looked at you in shock, not getting what was happening. You needed to go for him, you needed to save him, maybe he was still in this world with you, even though he was floating unconscious. You couldn't swim, you have never learned to swim and that lake was deep. But you didn't care, you just ran to the edge of the lake and you jumped in the water before Mandy could have done something about. You swam as you could right to where Darren's unconscious body was floating.