Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter
Sirius was so mad the whole day he didn't even notice Remus's absence. It was like he had a blindfold on, that way he could see nothing and no one. Finally at dinner James elbowed him particularly hard. Sirius punched him in the arm so hard he was sure it would cause a brightly colored bruise. "What?" Sirius snapped. James rubbed his arm wincing.
"Where's your boyfriend? Haven't seen him all day." James asked.
"Don't know, don't care." Sirius snapped as he impaled his fork into the wooden table, got up so fast he broke the legs on the bench sending kids toppling over sideways and stormed out of the great hall. He did care. And that made him angry. Had he hurt Remus? Had he shoved him too hard? Remus was fragile, unlike James who was quidditch tough. Sirius got to the dorms and slammed every door open, leaving holes in the walls where the door handles impaled the walls. Remus was not there. Sirius wished he had some kind of magical map to help but brushed the idea away as fantastical. He went and sat by the fire, close to the door so he would see when Remus got there. James, knowing better than to talk to Sirius when he was in one of his "moods" went up to their dorm with Peter to work on homework. Sirius sat there staring angrily at the fire, sitting way to close and feeling the painful heat as it bit into his robes around his knees. He waited and waited and waited until no Remus had showed up, the room was empty and it was nearly 4am. Sirius got so mad he trashed the room. Had he done something to hurt Remus? Maybe he was in the hospital wing. Sirius began begging Merlin not to let Remus be hurt. He sat up one of the chairs he'd torn open and thrown across the room so he could sit painfully close to the fire. Soon other students were rising and heading down to breakfast. James approached cautiously, having never seen Sirius this upset before.
"Did you get any sleep at all last night, mate?" James asked warily.
"Does it look like it?" Sirius snapped.
"Come down to breakfast, you need to eat." James offered.
"Leave me alone." Sirius said turning and hunching his back against James who sighed, shrugged and walked off. Sirius sat there until around lunch time when Remus stepped through the door looking terrible.
"B-Black." Remus said wide eyed.
"Remus." Sirius said grabbing Remus who made a pained groan and held him tightly against his body.
"Black you look as bad as I do." Remus laughed gently running a thumb down Sirius's cheek.
"What happened?" Sirius asked.
"I tripped." Remus laughed. "You know how clumsy I can be."
"Never do that again." Sirius said sharply.
"Trip?" Remus asked.
"Leave me alone for so long." Sirius snapped. "And what do you mean tripped?"
"I was trying to follow you and I tripped and fell down the spiral staircase to Gryffindor Tower." Remus said.
"I'm surprised you weren't killed." Sirius said wide eyed.
"Not my first time down a flight of stone stairs." Remus laughed.
"Look- I was mad that my mum was threatening to transfer me to another school and I lashed out at you. I pushed you and then you weren't around for a while and I thought I actually hurt you and then I felt like I was turning into my mother and I just felt so bad. And I punched James but he deserved it for being a git." Sirius said.
"Would you ever intentionally hurt me?" Remus asked.
"Merlin no." Sirius said.
"Then you're not your mother. You are good here." Remus said putting his hand on Sirius's chest and feeling heat and muscle under his hand. "And that's all that matters. It's what separates you from her." Remus said.
"Thanks Remmy." Sirius said putting his head down on Remus's shoulder and holding him tight against him.
"Not to mention you're much cuter." Remus laughed.
"Are you ever going to tell me what really happened?" Sirius asked. Remus's eyes widened.
"W-what?" Remus mumbled trying to maintain his composure.
"I won't pressure you or anything. You're entitled to your secrets." Sirius said stepping back and sitting down in the tattered chair, pushing it away from the fire enough for the temperature to be comfortable.
"I hope I never have to." Remus said softly.