Plot outline: Crossover fic
Plot outline: Crossover fic. Jeff Dunham and Puppets are thrown into the Naruto-verse via magical swirly portal in a parking lot. When the puppets come to life due to the portal's magic and scattered throughout the Naruto world, Jeff has to find all of them before all hell breaks loose. But then again, with this bunch, that's not gonna happen.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Jeff Dunham and company
Well, we're getting somewhere. In response to M. Slayer, I go to the internet, find a site with the little things on they and copy and paste into the word and copy+paste that every time. In other words, I cheat. ;;
Chapter 5 Oh you sick bastard.
You're kidding, right?
Tobi ran into the kitchen to find his rather pissed off sempai moodily fixing a large mug of tea. "Deidara-sempai!" Tobi cheered as he attacked the man.
"Tobi! Off!" Deidara snarled at the masked boy.
"But, but, Tobi just wanted to say hi..." He sniffed. Then he changed emotions completely. "Sempai, you're a mess. The maids are going to have a fit over your clothes in the wash."
"I'm not in the mood Tobi. Yeah." Deidara warned as the kettle whistled.
"It's so gross Sempai. Even Tobi is aware that it's socially unacceptable to be walking around covered in blo-" Tobi was cut off as Deidara attempted to strangle him. Achmed and Sasori watched form the doorway.
"Do they always act that way?" Achmed asked his fellow puppet.
"Pretty much." Sasori answered wearily. "Deidara. Stop strangling Tobi. It's useless. Go hit the showers, you're disgusting. Tobi, go be a good boy and find out if Koko has finished repairing my spare cloak." Sasori directed at the two feuding males. Achmed laughed at the disgusted look on Deidara's face. Sasori was starting to take a liking to the puppet. Unfortunately, Pein had shot down his plans for dissection. Deidara had left before Pein had told him the other part of his decision, claiming to have to use the bathroom. He'd tell the blonde later.
"So, what are we to do now, infidel?" Achmed asked Sasori.
"We wait for Deidara to calm down and not blow up the hideout, and we also wait for Koko." Achmed nodded. He rather enjoyed tormenting the blonde. It was fun to watch the expressions change. Maybe the 72 virgins could wait. Nah. This was too good.
An older woman in a blue yukata came up with a younger girl in a dark green yukata by her side and a bundle. The older woman looked at the puppets. "Sasori-sama, You must be gentler on these coats. This is the third one this month not to mention the others' coats. Now, where is this new recruit that Pein-sama informed me about." The old woman glanced around as if Sasori had hidden him somewhere.
"I'm right here." Achmed grinned an evil grin at the slight shock on the old woman's and the girl's faces.
"W-well then…"
"Achmed."
"Achmed-sama."
"No, you saying it wrong. You said Achmed, but it's ACKHMED. More phlegm grandma."
"Fine, ACKHMED-sama, I need your measurements for your coat."
"YOUR WHAT?!" Deidara walked in, holding his filthy clothes and dressed in his duds from when he originally joined. The girl went pink and shyly picked up the clothes he had dropped, a bit grossed out when she realized what was on them.
"You did not hear, infidel? We are now a three-man cell!" Achmed grinned and cackled.
La Cucaracha. On a Stick.
José was officially bored. Señor Sasuke was refusing to sleep in the room now. Needless to say, that really put a wet blanket on José's plans. The talking Puerto Rican Jalapeño on a stick decided to venture out from behind the bed in search for the young Uchiha. He hopped along, checked the hallway and hopped down, searching for the boy. Finally, he found whom he was looking for, taking a nap on the other side of the building. José checked the closet and saw that Sasuke had moved into the room. It was then José saw the en suite bathroom and noticed that Sasuke was indeed smelly as anything. José laughed at his own idea and hopped off to the shower.
"No…no mom…mommy, there's a talking… Jalapeño...on a stick…Kill it nii-san…" Sasuke mumbled in his sleep. The Jalapeño snickered. "Nrgh ack…" Sasuke woke up coughing. He looked around. He swore he heard laughing. Whatever. He fell back asleep, dreaming of a certain pink haired someone.
José was getting impatient. He wanted to hear this sissy scream like a little senorita again. It was quite entertaining. It was then he heard a clicking noise. José's green color faded as he realized he recognized this particular noise. He turned around slowly on his stick to see it. José's scream woke up Sasuke. Sasuke, still groggy ran unwittingly into his bathroom to see what was up. Then he stopped, rubbed his eyes and blinked to make sure he was indeed seeing what he was seeing. José was cowering in his shower, while there a huge Cockroach clicking in the other corner. On a stick. "I TOLD YOU IT WAS A BIG NASTY COCK-A-ROACH! ON A STICK! BUT NOOO, DON'T LISTEN TO ME!" José screamed at the boy while hopping out like crazy. Sasuke and the cock-a-roach sat and stared at each other.
"Damn Pepper." The Cock-a-roach muttered. Sasuke's screams were heard echoing through the hall.
"KABUTO!!"
Facing the music
Kankuro trudged up to Gaara's office. He had properly (and quite improperly) said goodbye to his girlfriend, packed up all his puppets lovingly, and wrote his last will and testament and put it on his bed. He reached for the door when he heard Gaara snarl from the other side of the door. "Konoha…" Kankuro gulped and opened the door to see a swirling mass of sand circling his brother who was reading a paper. "It seems…that thing was from Konoha and they want it back. For a sizable amount of money." Gaara explained softly. Kankuro shuddered and whimpered. "Is it still alive?"
"Y-yes g-Gaara." He stuttered.
"Well, where is it?" Kankuro began backing up, the sand did not look friendly today. Plus, Kankuro saw Gaara's cookie jar empty behind the plant. So that's why the thing was so hyper. Gaara had Temari add energy drinks to the cookie dough to keep him up.
"I'm waiting Kankuro."
"I…don't know." Kankuro closed his eyes and waited for it. He hoped it would be quick.
"What did you say?" Gaara's voice was no longer just Gaara's voice, Shukaku had begun to bleed through a bit.
Kankuro was now trying not to cry like a baby. "I DON'T KNOW! IF YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME JUST DO IT ALREADY!"
"Why would I do that, when I can assign you to go LOOK FOR IT!" Gaara thundered. "It's in this building somewhere isn't it? It shouldn't be that hard to find an insane, giggling, purple woozle!"
"It's not in the building."
It was then that Kankuro knew exactly how it felt to be a bug scraped against concrete by a little kid.
I AM NOT A DUMBASS!
Naruto was nearly crying from frustration. Walter was refusing to tell him why exactly he had called him a dumbass in Ichiraku's. "Please?" He whined for about the hundredth time.
"FINE! Look at the girl's behavior around you."
"She blushes and faints a lot and plays with her hands." Naruto said, impatiently. "What does that have to do with anything?"
Walter nearly bashed his head in. This kid was as stupid as he looked. "SHE LIKES YOU DUMBASS!" He screamed. Hinata, who was passing by, planning to tell Naruto this time how she really felt, fainted from pure shock. Naruto heard the thud and looked around the corner.
"HINATA-CHAN!" He yelled, freaking out at the fact she fainted again. Walter got up and watched Naruto fret over the girl like a mother hen. "Hinata! Are you sick again? Why did you pass out? Hinata? HINATA!" The poor girl passed out again. Walter chuckled.
"Ah, young love. Makes me sick." He grumbled.
Location: Konoha hot springs
Victor looked up and around. The case was laying next to him. He appeared to be in a resort somewhere. He then heard giggling and splashing. He looked up to see a red flag with what looked like Japanese written on it and an old man with huge long white hair with binoculars and a notebook perched on top of the building. The case fell open
. "Well SHEEYEWT! We're ain't in Kansas no more!"
"Indeed! Good speculation Beer Boy!"
"Don't chew be callin me that!"
Victor looked over to see a super hero puppet and a redneck puppet emerging from the case and talking to each other. "They're just puppets, they're just puppets." Victor muttered to himself as a sort of mantra.
"What chew doin boy?" Bubba J looked over at the freaked out teenager. It was then Victor lost it and began sobbing hysterically.
"I believe that lad is distraught." Melvin stated.
"Naw, I think he's just upset." Bubba said.
Yeah yeah. I know, not as good. Peanut will be back next chapter. And Melvin and Bubba and Victor are here! Hooray! Review?