Plot outline: Crossover fic. Jeff Dunham and Puppets are thrown into the Naruto-verse via magical swirly portal in a parking lot. When the puppets come to life due to the portal's magic and scattered throughout the Naruto world, Jeff has to find all of them before all hell breaks loose. But then again, with this bunch, that's not gonna happen.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Jeff Dunham and company

Answers to questions! Who is Victor? Victor is an OC. Remember the stagehand we met in the beginning of the story whom Jeff scared the shit out of? Yupp, that's Victor. Here's just a really brief profile on him; He's roughly 17, enjoys eating, making fun of really bad movies, smoking and hiding out in the air vents above the girl's bathroom with his buddies. He immensely dislikes homework, school in general and when people put hot dogs in mac&cheese.

While we're at it, I might as well give brief profiles on the two Akatsuki Maid OCs in this chapter.

Koko: Age: who knows? Older than 70, younger than 120. Job: Seamstress and head maid. Likes: order, cooking, sewing, Tobi, holding contests at celebrations to see who can guess her age (no one's won yet) dislikes: Hidan's mouth, dirty laundry, messes and at the moment Achmed

Fi: Age: about 16-17. Job: younger maid. Sold to Akatsuki by a raid party who destroyed her tiny home village in exchange for their lives when she was about six. Her daily jobs include cooking, cleaning, laundry, making beds, assisting Koko with repairs and making sure that the bathrooms are in order. Tobi likes to sneak candy from her stash behind the freezer. Likes: Music, cleaning, Deidara. Dislikes: cleaning toilets, Nori, and wasabi

Chapter Six. YOU PERVERTS!

I AM NOT INSANE! Part 3.

Karin was walking down the hallways searching for Sasuke. Again. He had eluded the past 48 hours, oh but she was going to find him, even if it killed her! She heard screaming down the hall. "KABUTO!" Sasuke-kun? Her ears perked up and she took off in that direction. He had been hiding his chakra signature from him, but she found him quivering in the corner of a spare room holding his katana in a defensive position with…a pepper on a stick? "Sasuke-kun? Are you alright?"

"SHH!! It will hear you!" He hissed violently.

"Si, senorita. Tis a huge nasty cock-a-roach. On a stick." The pepper whispered in a Spanish accent.

"Is that a pepper?"

"Jalapeño!" It snapped. "On a stick!" it added. There a clicking noise coming down the hall.

"Oh now you've done it!" Sasuke snarled at the two.

"Not my fault the senorita was being racist Señor Sasuke-kun."

"Shut up José! It will hear us!"

"Too late." José sighed as the Cock-a-roach rounded the corner.

"Then we run!" Sasuke grabbed the Jalapeño and ran down the hall, leaving Karin to the cock-a-roach.

"Sasuke-kun! Just don't leave me behind!" Karin whined. She heard the clicking stop and turned around. "KABUTO!"

Kabuto shook his head, trying to clear whatever happy dream he was having. It was about 2:30 in the morning and already those brats were screaming for him. What the hell could they need now? He fished around for his glasses on the bedside table and reluctantly got up. He trudged with a kunai all the way down the corridors before finding Karin shivering in a closet. "What?" His tone was deadly. He could easily slap around Sasuke-kun later, but Karin was a different story. She was quicker than Sasuke.

"Cock-a-roach." She whispered in horror. "BIG COCK-A-ROCH." Her eyes were wider than dinner plates. She grabbed him by the front of his shirt. "On. A. Stick." She whispered, shaking him with every word, eyes full of terror. Oh great. Kabuto thought. Another crazy one. Oh well, might as well throw her in with Jugo. No big deal. He got up, grabbing her by the hair and stalked off to find the other brat who woke him up initially. He was in a killing mood.

SCREW YOU!

Koko was in an equally murderous mood. The damn skeleton wouldn't calm down. He was convinced that she was trying to kill him with the needles. Koko was getting to the point of sending off Fi, the teenaged assistant, to go do laundry and wait for the skeleton to calm down. It was quite pointless at that point as Koko was pissed, Fi was distracted by Deidara being in the room and Sasori was arguing with Deidara. It was quite nerve-racking. Finally, she threw down the measuring tape. "Screw it! Fi, lets go." The old woman snarled. The young maid followed the old woman out the door reluctantly, still carrying the pile of clothes Deidara had dropped in shock at the news.

Deidara started glaring murderously at Achmed. "What did I do? The bitch was going to turn me into a voodoo doll." Achmed defended. "She can't see worth crap."

"SO? Doesn't mean you can't sit still so you can get the hell out of my room, yeah!" Deidara screamed.

"Your room?" Now, Achmed looked around and saw various piled of clay and paint everywhere. "Oh…In that case." Achmed made mental notes of everything's position in the room. It would come in handy later. "Fine, then I shall 'Get the hell out' as you so politely put it." Achmed glanced at Sasori. "Where are my quarters?" Sasori sighed.

"Follow me."

Koko stormed down the hallway. "Koko baa-chan! Please wait up!" Fi scrambled after the old woman. "I'm sure he wasn't intentionally doing it."

"Hmph. You still have so much to learn, Fi-chan." She turned down a second hallway. "We'll try again after dinner. But first, go wash those, they're making me sick and go put on a new yukata. They've stained yours." She called over her shoulder. The door to Koko's sewing room slammed shut. The girl sighed then took a look down. The clothes had started to reek and had indeed left a faint rust colored stain on her front. Nothing big. It took an effort to not vomit thinking about how the stains had even gotten on his clothes in the first place. Well, they're not S-ranked criminals for nothing. She thought miserably as she headed off to the washroom.

Not techno music unfortunately

Jeff, Shizune and several other Jounin had started heading towards Suna. They had located Walter, and according to the Kazekage, They had located Peanut. After he had gotten into the Kazekage's stash of energy drink laced cookies. Jeff had started slamming his head against the wall when he heard that and now had a headache, which Shizune was trying to heal during breaks. To Shizune and the shinobi, it was a pain having Jeff along. It meant that they could not go as fast because he was not capable of the speed they were.

The group was now in the middle of the Wind Country's infamous desert. "Are you positive we're going the right way?" Jeff asked nervously.

"Yes. I make regular trips out here for business." Genma answered lazily. That did little the reassure Jeff's mind. They were passing the outer cliffs roughly 5 miles away from the village when a roaring noise started up.

"SANDSTORM!" Shizune yelled over the noise.

The group dove into a cave and had no choice but to wait for the storm to pass. "How long does it usually take?" Jeff asked, unsure.

"Anywhere for 15 minutes to 2 days." Genma began picking his teeth with the senbon in his mouth.

"WHAT?" Jeff freaked out. 2 days and Peanut might have escaped by then. The hope he had regained from finding Walter began to fade.

Peanut's short Suna Adventure

Peanut began to feel sleepy from the motion of the cart. He started to drift off when the cart stopped. Then he heard a scream and looked up to see a girl about 8 years old looking in the vase he was hiding in. "Mommy! There's a weird monkey in the vase!" Peanut decided that it was a good time to leave. He quickly escaped as the girl's mother came over.

"There's nothing in there dear."

"But, I swear there was!"

Peanut's stomach started to rumble. As he looked around, He found he was in a different marketplace than the one before. This one was covered in food, rugs, scarves, and livestock. Everything the little woozle could only have dreamed of or saw in Aladdin. "If only Jefa-fa was here. Hahaha…Jefa-fa. DunHAM. Dotcom." He sang to himself while snatching an apple. He saw a girl who looked like pretty lady walking across the square. In fact, it was Pretty Lady! Peanut nearly ran up and tackled her, but then remembered it was her brothers who were the psychos. He was about to hide before she saw him, but it was too late, she had spotted him.

Temari gulped and swallowed her mental scars. "Come here little fella, I won't hurt you." She cooed at the strange creature. Temari had her hand sized fan hiding in her obi, planning on giving it a concussion with the iron handle when she got a hold on it. Peanut cautiously approached her. He wasn't too keen on the idea of going near her. She slowly moved her hand into her obi when he was about a foot away from her when he looked up, and then ran off. Temari swore and took off after him.

Peanut looked around, carpets, olives, fruits, vegetables, aha! Vases. He dove into one. Temari saw him go in. She immediately went to the one he was in and threw a kunai in to disable it. Peanut screamed in pain as it hit his foot. Temari reached in and grabbed him. As she was pulling him up, she pulled out the small iron fan.

Peanut looked at her. "How you doing?"

"None of business." Temari snapped.

"Well, good, bad?" Peanut was attempting to keep her talking while he thought of a way out.

"Fine, now that I get you back to Gaara so he doesn't murder Kankuro."

"That's g-g-g-good!" He cackled. With that, Temari brought the fan down upon his head, dazing him. "Mommy, I see pretty stars." Peanut slurred. Temari figured that was good enough and started heading back.

Hey other dumbass, pull my finger.

Naruto was carrying Hinata to the hospital. Walter trailed along beside him. "So. Obvious now, ya dumbass?" Walter gloated.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say old man." Naruto glowered at him. Naruto was confused in his feelings. He had never really thought of Hinata as more than a friend before. A really weird friend. But now, looking back and adding it all up, it made sense. But he always had liked Sakura-chan. But She had always and would always like Sasuke-teme.

"Let me guess, you like someone else?" Walter interrupted his train of thought.

"Maybe." Naruto really wasn't sure now. He hadn't really thought about it much.

"Teenagers. You and your hormones won't last long." Walter grumbled.

"Naruto! Why are you carrying Hinata?" Inuzuka Kiba came running up with a dog.

As Kiba was discussing Hinata's state of consciousness with Naruto, Akamaru was sniffing Walter curiously. "Get away you fur ball." Walter snapped, swatting Akamaru on his nose. Akamaru whimpered and tucked his tail between his legs. So, this is Kiba. Walter thought, remember the quote from the dumbass.

"Hey, you kid." Kiba looked down.

"What?" "My finger's jammed. It hurts, could you pull it out?" Walter asked, feebly.

"NO! DON'T DO IT KIBA!" Naruto yelled. Too late. Kiba pulled Walters finger and promptly passed out. Walter cackled.

"Two down in one day! New record!"

There's no place like home, there's no place like home

Despite being a teenager with a slight attitude problem, Victor had other emotional issues. This, was going to scar him for life and give his neurologist a field day. Bubba J and Melvin looked down at the teen in fetal position with concern. "You okay doke kid?" Bubba asked, poking him with a stick.

"Don't poke the lad, beer boy." Melvin stated. "He might be injured. This looks like a job for…Da da-da Daaa…Melvin!" The puppet struck a heroic pose.

On the roof of the bathhouse, Jiraiya heard someone sobbing. He turned around to see two midgets and a teenager in a fetal position. He jumped down to investigate. Upon closer inspection, they appeared to be…puppets?

"Who're you?" The one with a potbelly demanded. Jiraiya ignored him.

"What's with him?" Jiraiya gestured at the teenager.

"He's distraught." Melvin stated confidentally.

"Naw, dunt listen tah him. He's jus upset, that's all." Bubba J argued.

Jiraiya stared at the pair. He had half a mind to walk away, but decided to at least take the kid to the hospital. Jiraiya bit his finger, made a series of hand signs and slammed his hand on the ground "Summoning Jutsu!" A huge toad appeared. "Take the kid to the hospital." Jiraiya instructed. The kid screamed as the toad grabbed him with its tongue and disappeared.

Reviews? Poor Victor…This'll probably cause him to go over the edge.