Plot outline: Crossover fic. Jeff Dunham and Puppets are thrown into the Naruto-verse via magical swirly portal in a parking lot. When the puppets come to life due to the portal's magic and scattered throughout the Naruto world, Jeff has to find all of them before all hell breaks loose. But then again, with this bunch, that's not gonna happen.

BACK IN SUNA

Kankuro hobbled into Gaara's office. He winced at the imminent pile of paper work. The place had otherwise been restored to pristine condition. The cookie jar had been refilled, the plants' pots replaced, and Gaara's prized leather chair fixed. He decided to make sure it wasn't still broken and gingerly lowered himself into it. Nothing cracked. That was good. Gaara would have been murderous.

Kankuro sighed. His girlfriend's aunt had kicked him out the minute he could walk properly and his place was on the other side of the building. His eyes rested on a scroll that had appeared over the few days of Gaara's absence. He carefully unrolled it. It was a report of a skeleton now traveling with the group known as Akatsuki. Kankuro saw little importance of this and dismissed it as someone mistaking a malnourished anorexic as a skeleton. With that, he shoved it to the bottom of the pile.

He's Not my boyfriend!

As Sakura and Ino argued incomprehensively, Victor sat watching the two uncomfortably. Girls made him nervous. Especially pretty girls and now there were two of them sitting next to next arguing. The bell on the door of the BBQ tinkled.

"Hey Ino. Sakura, who's your boyfriend?" Chouji asked in a friendly manner.

"He's not my boyfriend!" Sakura snapped as the argument was interrupted. "And His name is Victor."

"Oh, sorry. Hi." Chouji sat down and the waitress brought out several more plates of food. The door rattled again and Nara Shikamaru and Sarutobi Asuma walked in.

"What, no room for us? Tch." The lazy genius complained. "You guys just think of ways to make my day troublesome, don't you?" He continued as he made room next to Victor.

The poor waitress looked frazzled. "Will there be anymore joining you?" She asked.

"Not that we know of." Asuma answered her. As he spoke, the bells tinkled and Sai stuck his head around the corner.

"I thought I saw the Lazy Ass come in here." He grinned his fake grin. "Is there room for me?"

The moved over a bit more with Sai still grinning. "So, who's your boyfriend Ugly?"

The rest of the patrons jumped as there was a crashing as Sakura threw Sai out the window. "Sakura-Chan, don't you have enough damages on your tab already?" Chouji reprimanded through a mouthful of food. Victor sat there, too scared to move. "You going to eat that?" Chouji asked him.

One of these things is not like the others

Jeff walked and tried to ignore his water bottle. The water-boy occasionally grumbled as he swished around. The kid with the hair that looked like a chicken butt had indeed turned into a clone of one of the ANBU. They hadn't noticed yet.

Sasuke couldn't quite believe the stupidity of the Konoha ANBU. He had carefully masked his chakra so that Karin wouldn't find him. Crazy Bitch. Sakura was never that crazy. She had had her moments, but nothing like Karin and definitely not as creepy as Hinata's crush and stalking of Naruto. He vaguely wondered if they had gotten together yet. Hopefully Sakura hadn't given in to the Gai-sensei clone for a date.

About six miles back, an ANBU re-emerged from behind a bush. "Um, guys? Where are you? Guys?" He looked around. "I know I take awhile, but c'mon!" He threw his hands up in frustration as he hurried on.

Out Cold

The two drunken puppets had finally passed out. Walter grumbled and kicked both of them in spite of it. He wished the Dumbass would hurry up. He was bored. He wondered if the blonde dumbass had taken his advice yet. Not his problem if he didn't.

His wife was probably going nuts by now wondering where he was. Damn Bitch. Couldn't let him be for thirty seconds. Why wouldn't she just die? The door opened and Shizune entered. "When's Dumbass going to be back?" Walter grumbled.

"It could be awhile." Shizune answered. "What happened?"

"They found booze." Walter snorted. "Damn entertaining."

'I knew I missed a bottle.' Shizune thought to herself as she began searching the desk. Ten minutes later, she had an armful of Sake. Tsunade walked in, took one look and turned right back around.

"Tsunade-Sama!" Shizune ran after her while trying not to spill alchol everywhere as Walter cackled.

Want a lil cheese with that Whine?

Deidara shook himself off. Why did Sasori-no-danna just beat him up with a strap? He was bleeding from several cuts and was feeling miserable. He was having by far, the second worst day of his life. His first was when he was forced into this stupid organization. He decided to check on his clothes and have a bitch and moan session.

"Fi," He whined. "You done yet, un?" He trudged in, collapsed in a chair at the card table set up in the laundry room and stared pathetically at the timid maid.

"Almost, Deidara-sama." Fi was hanging up the cloak to dry.

"I'm having the worst day." He continued to whine as he took a clean towel and proceeded to wipe the blood off his arms with it.

"That's Itachi-sama's…" Fi tried to stop him but gave up.

"Got any bandages?" Deidara asked.

"Not in here I don't." Deidara stared at her even more pathetically than before. Fi groaned. "I'll go get some." She sighed in defeat. Ten minutes later, Deidara's clothes were drying and Fi sat grudgingly bandaging up Deidara.

"He just attacked me out of nowhere. I didn't even do anything this time!" Deidara complained angrily.

"That doesn't sound like something Sasori-sama would do."

"Yeah he would, un." Deidara argued.

"At least no one's attempted to sacrifice you." A grumble come from the door way. "Truce Infidel?" Achmed hopped up on the other folding chair.

Deidara started laughing. "Y-you, Hidan." He started laughing again, making it difficult for Fi to continue. Achmed looked rather annoyed.

"Silence! I kill you!" He snarled. Deidara continued laughing. Achmed lunged for him but missed and hit Fi. She yelled as she fell back and nearly hit her head on the broken dryer. Deidara stopped laughing.

"Hey! What did she do to you, yeah?" Deidara picked up the skeleton and dragged him kicking and screaming obscenities in Arabic to the door before flinging him down the hallway by his feet.

"You bastard!" Achmed screamed as he flew.

Gaara the Matchmaker.

Hinata peered out from around the fence. Naruto was now fiddling with the lock on his apartment door.

"You're going to run into him eventually."

Hinata nearly screamed. Gaara dropped down from the tree. "Why not get it over with now?" Hinata spluttered and was about to run off before Gaara grabbed her with sand.

"Gaara? Gaara!" Naruto looked around.

"Just do it." Gaara stared at her. "Naruto. Come here."

Naruto looked around then hurried over to Gaara. "Now you two figure it out." Gaara closed both of them up in a sand ball and threw a light in before sealing it completely. He checked his watch before shrugging and wandering back to Ichiraku's for another bowl of ramen.

Reviews? I won't be updating for a bit. Bleh.