Chapter 30
Lucius shut the door behind them. The candles which had been lit now burned low in his room and dusk and turned to night time. Carefully, and with love radiating from every move he made, he laid his son gently in bed. Kissing his forehead, he went over to shut the curtains. Pulling them together quietly he was aware that his sons eyes were on him, following his every move. Walking into his en suite quickly he brushed his teeth. Once that was done, he shut the door to the bathroom and got into bed himself.
Without a second thought, his son curled up next to him and Lucius adjusted the boy so he was lying on his chest. Though his legs dangled either side now, Lucius was reminded of how many nights they had laid together like this before when he had been a baby. While one of Draco's hands curled about his shoulder, the other twisted his father's hair about. Rubbing circles on his back, Lucius placed a kiss into his fine blond locks.
Draco bathed in his father's affection. He felt an indescribably relief now that he knew it was over, but the fear had not yet been absorbed from him. What if she came back? Keeping his eyes open he looked about the large room and wished there was some way describe all the emotions he was feeling, but there wasn't. Finally surrendering his battle with his heavy eyelids, he let them shut and let his breathing become rhythmic and deep.
Lucius did not relinquish his hold on him when he was sure he was asleep but rather kept him in his arms for his own comfort. Had he not kept Draco with him that night, he would have got no peace what so ever. Holding him did his own heart the world of good.
Sighing heavily though, his thoughts turned to the dungeons. Whatever happened it was never going to be enough was it? The memories he had gained since she had entered the house were never going to leave him, only ever fade. Draco had been forced to grow up lately, and there was nothing his father could do to change that, thought Lucius looking at the top of his blond head.
Once again, and as ever when he was in turmoil over their son, Lucius felt his heart scream of for Cissa. If only she was here then all this could have been avoided, it would never have happened. But then he didn't want her as he would never want her to see how badly he had failed her. Their boy had undergone torture in his own home for months before Lucius had come to his senses, only thanks to Severus, and put a stop to it. Had his friend not been so gifted, would he be in bed with Maria now? Where would that have left the boy in his arms?
Draco stirred fitfully, and Lucius knew he was locked in a bad dream. He was too tired to wake from it, but there was no way Lucius would leave him asleep as he dreamed so unhappily.
"Son..." he whispered and Draco's eyes snapped open.
Instantly he was alert but it was obvious to his father he did not know where he was for a moment. After all, it had been years since he had slept in with his dad. Lucius watched as the understanding came on to his face and Draco shut his eyes.
"Did you have a bad dream baby?" he asked lovingly. It was a stupid question.
Draco nodded and his father knew he was no longer tired.
Rolling back on to the bed Draco caught his breathe. He felt hot and sticky.
"Daddy, in my dream you married her," he said as tears filled his eyes. "Daddy you told her that she was right and that you did not want me to stay." he said.
Lucius slipped his arm about the boy. This was why he had wanted his son to sleep in with him. Because he knew he was going to need him.
"Prince, it was just a dream ... nothing more." said Lucius as he reached out and stroked his sons back gently once more. He could feel the boys heart going ten to the dozen and he watched as tears cascaded down his face.
He had to know it was ok and that they were never going to be parted. His son was his life line and he always had been.
Draco turned to face his father and looked straight into his eyes. He knew what he was saying to be the truth but what if one day that changed? His father was his hero. If there came a day when he did not want the two of them to be together then he did not know what he would do. Draco's unhappy face crumbled further.
"I want my mamma!" he admitted to him. The words that he had murmured just a few weeks before for the first time were now beginning to haunt him.
She and her beautiful face was all he wanted. He loved his father dearly and he was always going to but the two of them wasn't enough after he had seen her, she had come to him.
She should be with them now. It was her right to be there with him.
"Oh my baby I know you do," said Lucius. He had never wanted him to cry for his mother but now he had, and he broke his father's heart. "Shall I let you in on a secret? I want your mamma too."
"Daddy, do you blame me?" he asked wiping his face. The tears were making him if anything even more agitated than he was earlier when he had left the wedding.
"blame you for what sweet boy?" he asked.
"For taking her away from you? It's my fault she died..."
"No it is not!" the speed and force that he said it with he could see alarmed his son and that had not been his goal, only to make him see that nothing could ever be further from the truth. "Baby what happened to your mamma - It was no one's fault least, of all yours! She loved you more than you can ever know. It was an accident...." he told his son who had reached out for his father's hand. While not wanting to smoother Draco Lucius didn't think he had ever felt such an urge to sweep him up in to his arms.
His urge was not resisted for long as his son reached out for him once more. "But I didn't want her to die! I want her to come home, can't she come home?"
"If she could have then she would be here. Do you know what she used to call you and me? We were 'her boys'. She adored her baby, and you were her whole world. Son I wish I could snap my fingers and bring her back but I can't."
"But why not?"
"I don't know son. It isn't fair, that is all I do know." He said to him.
Snuggling back into his fathers arms Draco begun to sob once more. He was tired of crying but it felt like he had to. He wanted too. But more than anything he wished that the pale moonlight image of his mother would come back to him as it had just the night before. Had it really been so recently she had come to him? It seemed so long ago.
Draco's cries reminded Lucius more and more of his baby days, but there was a difference. He was so much harder to comfort now.
Lucius remembered when he had thought there was only one option when he had cried for his mother as a baby- to hold him. But somehow that was just not enough anymore. He needed him to reassure him in other ways.
"You have grown up in to such a wonderful boy, you know that don't you? I love you and am proud of you. And so would she be." Said Lucius as a tear fell from his eye. He had cried more in the last twenty four hours since he had first learnt his wife was dead. But it could not be avoided. His son hurt and so did he. "And I meant what I said to you this morning. I am never going to remarry. I have and I will always love your mother. She was the be all and end all for me when it came to love except for you my child. Now it is just you and me and it is always going to be. I promise never to remarry."
-
When Draco opened his eyes the next morning he saw that the lit had begun to pour into his father's room. It had been comforting he thought to himself to sleep in with his dad who was still at his side. Checking the old grandfather clock that stood by the door he saw that ten o'clock had come. Normally both of them were up and awake by then and had had their breakfast. But not that day.
In the end Draco had woken from bad dreams four times that night and each and every time Lucius had been a kind and gentle father to his son and had comforted him lovingly and with patience. Draco had woken screaming on two of the occasions. It had been a trying night for father and son.
Now as he awoke for the new day he found since the last time he had been soothed to sleep by his father, he had not been plagued by bad dreams but rather he had slept peacefully and well.
Lucius was sitting up in bed when he saw the little one come round. He unlike his son had in the end found no peace and was beginning to doubt that he was ever going to get any again. After all he was never ever going to forgive himself for what he had done when he had let his son be harmed. He had not slept a wink.
However when Draco gave him as smile good morning he was able to give him one back. He didn't feel ion the least bit grumpy with the boy. Only with himself.
"Good morning my dragon," he said to him as he let his son snuggle into his side. He seemed more peaceful at last. That could only be a good thing. Lucius put his arm about him loosely and kissed his forehead.
"'Od Morning Dad," he said as he rolled into him and kept his eyes shut. He was very sleepy Lucius noted. But then he had only just woken up and he had been disturbed so much the night before that he was going to be exhausted. Lucius wouldn't be surprised if he had a nap that day.
"How do you feel?"
"Sore." Draco admitted to him. There were going to be no more lies between father and son and that went unsaid for both of them. They had to be honest.
"Yes I think we had better get up in a minute so we can sort out your bruises." Draco shock his head into him and moaned a little. He didn't want to get up. "We have to." Murmured Lucius as his fingers smooth out his sons bed head. "The others are going to be worrying. There are a lot of people here who love you and you must never forget that."
In the end Lucius rose earlier than his son did. Shaving in an instant, the job that could take muggles half an hour or so was done in a heartbeat. He dressed in some of his older, more comfortable robes. He knew it was going to be a bad day again. He might as well be at ease in what he wore.
Going across to his sons he helped his dress and applied the ointments to his wounds again. If anything there seemed to be more than when he had looked the night before. He supposed it wasn't ever something you got used to was it? Your child's body battered.
When the two Malfoy's arrived at breakfast they saw that Severus had indeed stayed the night. He along with Jane and Eliza's eyes turned to the door when the father and son entered the room giving Draco the urge to be hidden among his father's robes. However Lucius gave him a smile to install confidence in the boy.
Sitting between his uncle and his father he saw his fathers Malfoy mask go over his face. Draco knew all he had to do would be to talk him to remove it but it was still shocking how easily it could be applied even in this most intimate circle of their household and friends.
"How do you feel this morning Draco?" Severus asked.
"Better than I did."
"Well that's good." Eliza said relieved but it was obvious that he was still in a great deal if discomfort.
Lucius ate little, but what he did was eaten quickly. He had a lot to sort out and he knew it.
"Draco, daddy has some work to do today. I'll finish by three, but do you mind if I go? I won't if you don't want me too." He said to his son once they were done eating.
"Is Jane going to stay with me?" he asked looking at her for support.
"Always." She nodded.
Draco would have preferred to have his father with him of course he would have. But then he was feeling more confident than he had for weeks. And besides he would be back by three, that wasn't so long. He hoped...
"Promise to come home?" he begged.
It broke Lucius heart that he had to ask that question. Ever since he had found out his son seem to be asking for him to 'promise' a lot to him. Things that shouldn't have to be promises. It seemed like that was the only way he believed it was going to happen.
"I promise." He nodded. Kissing his sons forehead he called Jane, and left the two of them heading out to the gardens to play.
Going into the office he saw Severus had seen fit to call Steph which was a good thing he supposed.
"Tell me the worse." He asked them as he collapsed into the chair behind the desk.
"Well the 'MALFOY MARRIAGE MESS' was the story that the Prophet ran with today. There's little fact in the article but a lot of speculation." She said to him. "Had it been a lower key event then it would have been easier to cover the scandal but it is not going to be easy. You have to decide the official story we are going to run with." She said to him.
He nodded. The press up until then had been the last thing on his mind.
"I will release a statement by the end of the day. Until then I want nothing to do with the press, there is too much to be doing here. What about work?" he asked.
"Sir, don't even worry about it. I have it covered." She said to him. "I had better get back to the office though."
"Very well. Thank you."
As soon as she was out of the room Lucius turned to Severus.
"How is he? Really?" asked Severus.
"He is tired, and he is shattered, and he has been devastated time and time again over the last few months. He needs love and comfort. He needs me right now. We're going to go to France again. He always likes it there and the fresh air will do him good." Lucius said to himself hoping that getting out of Wiltshire was going to do all of them some good. Severus would be teaching so it would just be the four of them he thought but that would be enough. "I think the question now is how did last night go?"
"I think you will be satisfied." Severus nodded.
Lucius smirked. He cared not for the details at that moment but would get them at a latter date. Draco had to be his priority and making sure they were secure as a family.
"Have you any poly juice potion at the moment Severus? Could you get your hands on some quickly?"
"I imagine it wouldn't be too difficult."
"Good. Maria has to be seen to have left the manor - she has to go to Diagon Alley, show herself, somewhere public. Then she can disappear mysteriously. As long as it doesn't lead back to the Malfoy Manor." Mused Lucius.
"I'll do it."
"Are you sure?"
"It's like you said, you have to be here right now. I want to help you Lucius. Draco needs protection. If you went away, he'd never recover. Andromeda is an adequate aunt, but she would never make a mother to the boy."
"No woman can." Sighed Lucius. "He will never have a mother. Thank you Severus, for everything. I dread to think where I would be if it was not for your friendship." Severus noted the sincerity in his voice.
He looked at Lucius. In all the years they had known one another the potions master did not think he had ever seen his friend look so worn out. "I feel much older than I am." He admitted as he saw his friends face scan his. "And yet the worst of today is still not over."
"What will be worse than the press?" he asked. They both knew that the public were going to be asking questions about what had gone on in the ancestral home of one of the most prestigious families of the land.
"Andromeda Tonks. That's what."
-
"She did what to him?" Andromeda eyes were wide with shock and her husband's shoulders were weighed down with grief over the sad tale they had just heard. Whatever they had been expecting to hear was the rot of their nephew's troubles that was certainly not it. "And you had no idea?"
"Of course I had no idea. The moment I found out what she had been doing I called off the wedding. I put a stop to it – too late I grant you but I am there for him now."
Andy collapsed into the sofa by her husband and he took her in to his arms lovingly. They were both shaken up by what had happened to the boy who they had had so much to do with in his short life. Lucius didn't think he had ever appreciated the depth of their feelings for his son up until that moment.
"If his mother was here she would be devastated." Andromeda sobbed.
"I know she would, believe me, no one know that better than I do."
A silence fell among the three of them that Lucius found it difficult to cope with. "I should be getting back soon; he is going to be wondering were I have got too." He found it hard to see his wife's sister cry as well. He didn't know why.
"Well can I come with you?" she asked. "Lucius I want to see him."
"No. Not right now." He said to her. He didn't want people coming into his house right now unless they were invited by him. Besides, Draco would be unnerved by visitors. The Tonks never came to the manor.
"Please." She more demanded than asked.
"No."
"Dromeda honey –" Ted tried to calm her.
"I have to be with him, I have to hold him!" said Andy furiously to both men.
"Don't you understand a word of what I just said to you? This is not about you and what you want, it's about him." Lucius said feeling his own temper rise. "He is scared right now and he needs peace. No one so much as looks at him without me knowing about it at the moment. Don't push me, and do not disclose any of what I have told you to anyone else, either of you." He said rather viciously. "I swear, if you cause a fuss, if you go to the Ministry or anyone – you will never see him again, I promise you that." Scowling at them he left the house. He had meant to be gentle with her, but no one dictated to him where or when they saw his son. Draco, he swore, would be better protected than ever.
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