Disclaimer: I do not own Jeff Dunham or Naruto

Rescue missions

"Ugh." Jeff sat up with a throbbing head. "Where am I?"

"Tell us, who are you?"

Jeff looked up to see a man standing over him and several men and women standing behind him. He appeared to be in a cave.

"Jeff Dunham. Who are you?"

"Are you part of Akatsuki?"

"No, I'm looking for them. They have my puppet."

"Sasori of the red Sand?"

"Uh no…Achmed the dead terrorist."

They all looked at each other and shrugged.

"We are survivors of a village destroyed years ago. We are recovering those taken. Several of our women, men and children are with the Akatsuki as servants. You almost gave up our position. We had no choice. We apologize."

"It's alright." Jeff was a bit freaked out. He was knocked unconscious and kidnapped by a group about to attack a terrorist organization. Great.

"So, are these puppets weapons like the Great Puppet Squad of the Sand?"

"No. They're more annoying, but I kinda need all of them back. You see we're not from here…"

"Portal?"

"How did you know?"

"In our travels, we've seen the damages The Portal can do. Some primitive villages have taken to worshipping at and everything it spit out as a goddess or rare god."

"Ok then. Um what happened to the other people?"

"Both of us have been following you for awhile. We fought them off. They were ANBU from the Leaf Village. We figured we'd saved your life."

Well in a way they did. Jeff's cowardly side chirped. But it's kinda important that the ANBU stay near-by. His sensible side argued. The then realized that the cowardly side sounded an awful like Peanut while the sensible sounded a lot like José. Weird.

Awww

Hinata and Naruto strolled around the memorial park hand-in-hand. Naruto had run off while holding on to her hand through the town and she called apologies to those they nearly knocked over. He had finally stopped outside the grocery. He had promptly grabbed a bunch of things and paid for them before she could register what was going on and dragging her out again to the park. He had picked a spot with a view of the waterfalls and unrolled a blanket and began pulling out the food.

"Come, sit, eat." He had directed her. They sat and ate and laughed, not a care in the world. Well, Naruto was a bit wary and was keeping an eye out for Neji. Now it was twilight and the fireflies had begun to come out.

"Hey Hinata-chan?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun?" Hinata looked up at him.

"Will you go to the festival with me this weekend?" Naruto asked sheepishly.

"Sure." Hinata giggled and turned pink. She had really calmed down a lot.

"Good! Well I should probably take you home now?" Naruto scratched his neck.

"Probably. My father…" She trailed off and the content had melted off her face turning to uneasiness.

They made their way back into town as the lamps started coming on and stores began to close. The restaurants were loud with raucous laughter from those in good spirits as the smell of food wafted on the slight breeze. Hinata leaned into Naruto's shoulder as they walked.

"Hinata! There you are! We've been worried!" Neji turned the corner and snapped. "Stay away from her Naruto!" Neji grabbed her by the arm, ignoring protests from both parties. Hinata threw an immensely upset look at him as she waved. Neji ranted the whole way down the street, leaving Naruto standing in the middle of the road holding the blanket and bag under one arm. He slowly turned and shuffled back to his apartment. He wondered if all the Jinchurriki had to deal with this shit.

Saved!

Sasuke squirmed. Lee had fallen asleep on him while he was still face down on the floor.

"Psst…Sasuke." A voice came snaking under the door as water seeped in.

"Suigetsu! Get him off of me!" Sasuke hissed.

Suigetsu materialized and began to roll Lee off when he got decked in the face.

"Oomph!" The unconscious Rock Lee staggered up.

"Oh, I forgot he fights in his sleep." Sasuke added casually

"Screw. YOU." Suigetsu snapped as he turned into water and made his way over to Sasuke and undid his bindings.

"Shut up and hurry up before he actually wakes up. Then we're both screwed." Sasuke hissed.

"Let's go." They both took off running. They managed to avoid ANBU and Jounins by some weird miracle.

"Where is everyone?"

"I don't know. Where are we going?"

"Uchiha complex. It's abandoned. No one will go there." Sasuke and Suigetsu ran towards the general direction.

"So, who was that guy and why did it smell like alcohol in there?"

"Don't ask." Sasuke snarled as he turned his head to look, he collided with something. Or rather someone.

"Sasuke? IS IT REALLY YOU? SASUKE!" The hyperactive ninja promptly glomped him.

"Naruto, we need somewhere to lay low. Can we stay at your apartment for the night?" Sasuke hissed.

"Of course!" Naruto grabbed Sasuke and began running. Suigetsu attempted to keep up. Naruto ushered them in before slamming and locking the door behind them.

"SASUKE-TEME!!!!" Naruto suddenly screeched as he landed a blow to the head. "How could you abandon your village like that?!" Great. More of this.

Bad Idea

Sweet Daddy Dee brushed himself off and walked in any direction, trying to find the damn laundry room where they would fix his damn shirt. Did that freak know how much it cost him for this silk shirt. Shit. He soon wandered in to a hallway. There at the end was a sliding door with steam curling underneath. Laundry room. Sweet Daddy Dee opened the door to reveal Konan in a towel getting out of the underground hot spring that ran into their hideout.

"Well Hello Sweet thang. Haha!" Sweet Daddy said suavely. Konan on the other hand screamed obscenities sent a flock of paper birds after him. Sweet Daddy Dee ran off, screaming and trying to fight off the birds. Finally he dove into an empty room and slammed the door. Covered in papercuts and bleeding, he panted and slid down the door. Crazy Bitch! Hot Damn! Aw shit who was he kidding? He was in Love.

And we wind down my lovelies. Yes, yes. About 3 more chapters before the finale or less. Do me a favor and review? Please?