AN: Wow! The response to chapter 23 was amazing. I'm glad, because I spent way too much time writing it. I know a lot of you don't dig Finn, but I still love him. Of course, you know my philosophy is about loving everyone. I just love Finn more when he's not with Rachel. Enjoy!
I walked up to Rachel's house and raised my hand to knock on the door. I put my hand down, then reached up to knock again.
"You don't want to go in there."
"Ah!" I yelped. Quinn was sitting in the porch swing sipping tea in her pajamas. I hadn't noticed her sitting there. I took a deep breath and waited for my heartbeat to go back to normal.
"Puck and Rachel are pretty cozy, and I doubt you want to see it."
"I know. I saw the picture already," I told her.
"What? I only sent that picture to Tina and Britt!"
"Yeah, well, Santana did some forwarding."
"And you came to break it up?"
"Actually, I came to see how you're doing." I plunked down beside her. I could see Quinn's breath, and she shivered, so I put my arm around her. She looked surprised.
"Don't!" she snapped, shrugging off my arm. "Don't come here and hold me if you don't mean it."
"I do mean it," I said. I prayed for the right words. "Kurt says I'm an idiot. When I got the picture from Santana, he just looked at my face and said, 'What's stopping you? Go to Quinn, you idiot!' And I couldn't think of anything that was stopping me. I'm tired of being mad and trying to make myself not love you anymore. I miss you and I…I even miss Drizzle."
"We did this before," she yelled. "We tried to be in love again. It didn't work!"
"Because we had all those secrets. Now we don't! I know about Puck and you know about Rach. We know everything."
"You're still mad," she hissed. "Deep down, you know you're still mad."
"Kurt says it's just my pride."
"Kurt says? Kurt says?" She got up and started pacing, fast, hands on her belly. She was wearing pink pajamas with dessert all over them: pies and cakes and cookies. Looking at her, it was hard not to smile.
"He's pretty smart about relationship stuff," I told her. "I know he used to have a crush on me or whatever, but he says now that we're probably going to be stepbrothers, that's kind of gross. So he's moving on, but he wants me to be happy, and he says I'd be happiest with you."
"Do you have any idea how lame that sounds, that you're here because Kurt said you should come?"
"Yeah, I know. I'm not good with this stuff, okay. It's just…when he said it, I knew it was true. I miss you, and I love you. I want you back, Quinn."
"And what happens when Rachel's single again?"
"The messed-up thing is, I wanted Rach more when she wasn't single. That's how I know she and I aren't right together."
"And what about me? You stopped wanting me."
"It was like I was watching you disappear," I said. "When I met you, you were so awesome. You would hold my hand and smile at me. When you kissed me, I could tell you loved me. And then Sue made you captain of the Cheerios, and everything changed. It was so slow that didn't notice it, but you changed. You stopped eating. You stopped being nice to people. You stopped being nice to me. Yeah, part of me is hurt that you slept with Puck. I don't get why, if you wanted to have sex, you picked him and not me. But since you got pregnant, it's like…it's like you've been coming back, Quinn."
"It wasn't like that, you know," Quinn said. "It's not like I wanted sex and thought, 'I pick Puck.' I hated my life: my family, my body, who I'd become. I just needed to escape. I needed to escape everything—even the best thing in my life: you. I know that's messed up. I know that. But I'm trying to change. I am, Finn."
My heart felt all flippy and big in my chest. She swiped away her tears. I wanted to hug her so tight and kiss her until we couldn't think about anything else.
"What are you playing with?" she asked me.
I looked down at my hands. I hadn't even realized it, but I was holding her barrette, running my fingers over the white plastic daisies. I held it out to her.
"Did you bring that back for me?"
"No," I admitted. "I…I carry it in my pocket. I have since you left. You can have it back if you want it, though."
"You can keep it," she whispered, so I slipped it back in my pocket. She was crying again. "You know, tonight we were watching a movie, and this guy was giving this girl a line about how he doesn't make commitments. He doesn't make plans, because they make him feel tied down. And Puck turns to Rachel and tells her, 'there are girls you say that shit to, and there are girls you make plans with.' Last year, I knew which kind of girl I was, but now? When Puck was with me, there were no plans. He was chatting up Cheerios in the halls at school. But with Rachel, he…"
"That's about him, not about you," I said. "Even when things were bad, I had plans for us."
Quinn raised an eyebrow. "Ruling the school? Head Cheerio and captain of the football team?"
"No. It was normal stuff: school dances, going swimming during summer vacation, visiting colleges, and filling out applications for schools and scholarships. Maybe even going to the same college. Even…stuff after that." I couldn't tell her that sometimes I pictured us getting married and having kids. It just seemed like too much pressure to put on her.
"And now?" she asked. "What plans do you have for us now?"
"I want to walk into school on Monday holding your hand. When you go into labor, I want to be there for you. Whatever you decide about the baby, I want to be there for that, too. And I still want all that other stuff I used to want for us."
I reached out and brushed her tears away with my thumbs. When I bent down to kiss her, the kiss was salty. Her belly was between us, and it was bigger than when she moved out. I mean, I knew it was, but knowing it and feeling it were two different things.
"Can I?" I gestured at her stomach. She nodded, so I kneeled and put my hands on her belly. "Hey, baby girl," I said. I felt movement under my hand. Our eyes met, and Quinn smiled. It was the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen.
I had a big lump in my throat, but I smiled back. I stood, slid my hands into her hair and kissed her. It had been so long since we'd kissed this way. Her hands were on my face, and her lips were so soft. She tasted like peaches and cinnamon. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close. We kissed and kissed until I had to pull away.
"Uh-uh," Quinn purred, giggling. "Get back over here! Just…think of the mailman." And then she kissed me again.
Please take a moment to review. I adore reviews! Also, who should we hear from next? Matt (whose character I would have to make up completely since--as far as I can remember-- the poor boy has never had a single line)? Mike (who once spoke the oh-so-revealing line, "It'll be choppy.")? Omniscient narrator? Rachel's dads? Someone else entirely? Drop a comment.