Chapter 40

Lucius slept better that night than he had since September that night. He had thought that he was going to become accustom to his son being away. However, if that was going to happen then it had not in the first three months of him being gone.

He had only been able to align the last few months with what he had had to endure when he had been in Azkaban. That had been the only time before when he had been denied access to his boy. It was not that Hogwarts did not allow visitors. He knew that if he was truly worried about his son or needed him, then all he had to do was go and get him. But the fact was, it was better for Draco if he did stay away when he was at school. He had to give the lad a chance to grow. He was not going to do that if his father was watching his every move.

Even in the few months he had been away though, Lucius was able to see the change in Draco from when he had first gone to school. He spoke a bit louder now. He walked more confidently. He also gave own his opinion more decidedly and did not look to him for help so much.

All in all, it was a more confident Draco he had got back from Hogwarts.

He had to say he was grateful for that fact. He had been worrying that he had brought the boy up with thoroughly too much affection lavished upon him. He had been berating himself for spoiling him too much.

The fact Draco was more independent meant that he was much more like his forefathers had been and therefore a much better heir for him to have.

His family heritage had always meant a lot to Lucius. Being a Malfoy, he had been taught from a young age meant something. It was time Draco saw this too, he thought. It wasn't only the fact that their blood was so pure – it was so much more than that. It was a sense of belonging that the face of his ancestors had always given him. It was the fact that they had built the family from scratch. There must have been a time when the Malfoy's were not as significant as they were in the present time. Someone had taken their family and had the courage to build upon their good name. It was not only for Draco that he wanted to preserve their lineage. It was for them too.

He did not want to be a lesser son of greater fathers.

Nor did he wish his own son to be.

Yet for all the fact he knew that this reasoning made , there was still the odd feeling in him that he was still not ready or his baby to grow up – because Cissy had known him as a baby. He had been her baby.

She had never called him 'it' when they had not yet found out he was going to be a boy. He had always been 'baby' to her.

In truth, he felt bereft that Draco was soon to be a teenage. True, he had a over a year left befpre that, but that wasn't so long. What was a year?

Reminiscing was a strange thing. It brought up pleasant and unpleasant emotions and as he sat in his office late that evenin,g he knew that he should stop and go to bed. It was Draco's first day at home the next day and he knew that without a doubt his son was going to be a bag of energy. Even if the boy was a Ravenclaw, that did not mean he was going to want to read his holidays away.

But the elder he got, the harder he was finding it to go into their room knowing she was not going to be there. He would have thought he would have grown used to it in the years since her death. That summer marked the twelfth since her passing.

No, sleep evaded him.

Yet weariness dragged him down. His son, as ever was the only light. Comforting himself with the fact that boy was now safely tucked up in his own room, in his own bed, Lucius breathed a sigh of relief. At least for the night, he was not alone.

-

Over breakfast Eliza and Lucius had to endure endless pleas from Draco to be allowed to go out on his broom. It was obvious Draco had hoped in the time that had passed since September; his father had forgotten that he had said he was not going to be going out on his broom that Yule tide.

"You did the crime Dragon, now you have to do the time." Said Eliza simply as she looked at the toast in front of her as if she was allergic to it, worrying her old charge. He had noticed of late she had not been eating as much as she once had. His son didn't though. He only grinned at the sound of what was now surely his 'old 'nickname.

"But it was only one mistake. And in all my class tests, I have done very well this term."

"Even if you so say so yourself." Cut in his father dryly, uncharacteristically playful.

"And I served all my detention – come on dad, please let me go flying..."

A pensive look crossed Lucius face for a moment as he pretended to really consider it. And then...."No."

"Oh, come on!"

"Don't 'come on' me, son. And no more 'please' either. One holiday without going out on your broom is not going to kill you. It will teach you a lesson in respect."

Draco shook his head, sure that his Uncle had said something similar about the effect that the detentions were meant to take on him.

"So what am I meant to do?"

"Use your imagination... even if you were allowed on your broom, you would not fly the entire winter break away!" In fact, Lucius was sure that the only reason his son wanted to go out flying so much was because he could not.

It was not long till he skulked away, muttering something about wanting to go and get some fresh air, even if he could fly in it.

"Are you alright?" asked Lucius eyeing the uneaten toast on his governess's plate.

"Fine sweetheart." She said to him as if he was ten once more. She looked tired though to his eye.

And old...

-

When Severus came to see them though, it was not out in the fresh air that he found his nephew but perhaps unsurprisingly, taking advantage of the library. While the school one was old and well stocked, the Malfoy library was more than able to equal it. Draco was yet to explore all of it. He had always been a book worm but now he was learning independently of Jane he found he was finding books all the time she had not exposed him too, as well as books that went into great depth over what he had been learning at school.

"Draco." He said as he entered the room to find the boy engrossed in a dusty old book. It was not what he had thought to find him doing. He thought Draco would be playing some game, but then he had grown up in the months he had been away from home.

"Hey Uncle Sev," came the absent minded response which reminded the Potions Master so much of himself when he had been young and reading. He had hated it when he had been interrupted and for a moment, he considered turning and leaving the boy to his reading. But just as he was about to act the room, he heard the book Draco had been reading slam shut.

Turning back to the boy, he found Draco watching the closed book still and saw he had the look of someone who had not found what they were after.

"Was it of no use to you then dragon?" he asked and as they had done at that first breakfast after returning, Draco's lips turned into a smile.

Something told him he should stop them using such a babyish name for him now but at the same time he was glad to be home and be their dragon once more. If he was not dragon, then he doubted he was home at all.

"None at all." The little blond sighed.

"Frustrated?"

"Slightly."

"Then maybe you will oblige an aging uncle by telling him this conundrum which has got you so worked up."

Draco looked at him. He had of course been looking for information on the so far illusive Nicholas Flamel. Somehow he did not know why, he just felt that his friends would not want him to tell Severus.

Secrets were not a good thing though. He knew that better than most, even at his young age.

"My mind was thinking about what you said that day in class uncle – about putting a stopper in death." He thought on the spot. It was not a complete lie – the phrase had haunted him.

"And why would you be dwelling on that?" said a somewhat horrified Severus. Death was not something Draco should be thinking about.

Before he had even said it, he felt horrified for thinking it - for using her as if she was an excuse. But it was suddenly too late. He had said the words. "My mother."

Instantly, his uncle's eyes turned a softer shade of black. He had not had a brilliant mother, but at least he had had one.

"What about her?"

"Well I was just thinking. We live in a world that is surrounded by magic. So why couldn't we just bring her back? If you can stop it happening while you are alive, then why must you stay dead?" he asked. He had started off trying to throw his uncle of the scent of what he was looking for – the Philosophers Stone – but the more he asked the questions, the more he realised how truthful they were to his soul.

He looked up at him with desperate eyes as if he was expecting him to just magic up a way to get Narcissa back where she belonged.

Yet if there had been a way, Lucius would have found it.

"It is the way that destiny makes it so Draco. There can be no reprisal from the grave."

"I know that – I am not stupid uncle."

"No Draco. You're not."

The young Ravenclaw was beginning to understand that her sporadic visits were never going to make up for her not being in his life.

A larger hand covered his and uncle and nephew sat there for quite some time, undisturbed.

-

Lucius was concerned when he heard about the conversation, but he had to say not completely surprised. How many wizards over the years had lost someone that they had loved and then searched high and low for a way to bring them back? He had to admit that he counted himself among that number.

"He is thinking of her more and more as he gets older Severus, that much I cannot deny. The day that I took him to Kings Cross to go to school for the first time, he had to endure watching hundreds of other children being kissed by their mothers before they went to school. I cannot think it was a pleasant experience for my son."

"Of course not."

"He was a baby when we lost her but that does not mean that he did not know her. I truly believe he is not yet done grieving for the excellent mother he could have had. He grieves for what he never had. All we can do is be there for him when he does grieve, and try to ease the pain."

Lucius was worried for him. It sounded as if the boy had been distraught. However when he saw Draco, he was once again bright and cheerful. The moment of grief had passed. And he had something - someone - to cheer him up.

"I have a surprise for you son." said Lucius to him as he walked into his bedroom.

"What is it?"

"Go into the living room and find out."

Draco was used to his father giving him good surprises about Christmas time and if he was right then Lucius was not going to fail that time either. He had a look on his face as if he knew he had got a real treat for his son.

Not needing to be told twice, Draco run out of the room a d down the stair case before veering off to the living room where he found perhaps the best present he was going to receive that Yule Tide.

A visit from someone who he had missed greatly.

Jane. He had out grown her as a governess, but in no other ways and the expression on his face told her she was a most welcome guest in his eyes.

"Oh my young master," she said with delight as if they had not been apart for the past three months, as if she was still his nurse. "It is so good to see you."

"Jane!" he had paused for a moment when he had entered the room with the shock of seeing her face but when he felt that his kegs were able to move again, he flew to her. He was received with great love into her arms. Ever since he had been young he had had a place in her heart and in the warmth of her arms he could feel it.

"Oh Jane, I missed you so much."

As much as it had meant the most to him, due to the fact they had been in public, not even his reunion with his father had been as warm as his one with Jane was and he knew that had to because she represented everything good and safe about his childhood.

"And I you too Draco, to be sure!" she giggled as she kissed him. "It has been a very long few months indeed."

Lucius, by this time had caught up his son, was glad to see that his plan had worked - he had brought such joy to two people he cared for.

He knew a lot of people would not believe it, but he did like to make those he loved happy.

Especially his little one.

Draco would always be his little one. He saw that most clearly when he was with his governess.

"Why don't I call for a pot a tea?" he offered.

"I think that is a very good idea dad. I need to tell you so much." He said as he turned back to the women.

"Well then tell ahead. I have all day." She said, still holding his hand as she sat down on the sofa. He did not need to be beckoned to sit by her side.

"Oh wait for me," said an aged voice from behind Lucius. "I am not yet done hearing about the trouble our little rascal made when he was up at the school," said Eliza, with an affectionate smile as she walked in and took up one of the armchairs. Draco grimaced.

"Yes, even I heard there had been a few incidences. Master Draco, what did I say to you about behaving yourself?" it was as if she had never been away. However, all parties in the room knew that Jane's voice was not as hard as she would have normally wanted it to be.

"Jane, I am so glad you're home!" Said Draco as he laughed and she knew it was true. She had come home, even if it was just for the evening. Whether it was because she had been there for such small space of time comparatively, or whether she had become genuinely fond of the Malfoy Manor, she had not yet settled into her new job as easily as she had settled into life with Draco. How she had missed the little one!

"Bless you child," She said as she cupped his cheek and she knew she was going to have to swallow the rather large lump that had risen in her throat and ignore the wetness of her eyes. "Now, I want to know everything. Don't you dare leave out any juicy details!"

If there was any adult who he truly felt he could reveal all too, along with his aunt Andromeda, it was Jane. She had always been good at keeping his confidence. He wished suddenly that Eliza was not there and he had the power to banish his father from the room but the fact remained that he did not.

As he had with his father, he would have to give the governess the somewhat edited version of his first term.

While his son launched into his tale, Lucius just sat back and listened to him. He felt as if he had his whole family about him. It was good to have them back together. He was utterly relaxed in there company.

They could pass a most pleasurable evening.

"So what is your new family like?" said Draco trying to keep the jealousy out of his voice once he was done with his own tale. He had often wondered what Jane had been doing.

"Yes, I hope they know what a pearl you truly are my dear." Added Eliza, who in her time there had stretched her maternal feelings to Jane.

"They are- very agreeable." She said level headedly but even as she had said it she found that she knew that was not going to satisfy their curiosity. "They are straight and middle class and I never argue with my young charges as I did you sir." She said turning to the boy at her side.

"So in other words you are bored out of your mind?" Draco summed up what she had just said in a much cruder way.

"No, sir no! I mean – just – thoroughly bored. Yes I am."

They fell about laughing but they all knew that it was no laughing matter when one of their own was so unhappy, as Lucius knew now her masked had fallen. But perhaps she would be unhappy anywhere away from his child. She had been a good nurse to him and she had been happy in their home.

"No, the children are far too well behaved for my liking. They listen in all my classes. They go to bed when they are told." She said teasingly.

"Well that is not the way to your heart."

"No, as you well know sir. I shall settle in I am sure."

I will just have to banish the last ten years from my mind.

She gave a heavy sigh. However the last thing that she wanted to do was to bring down the mood of the party.

"Master Lucius, would you mind very much if I were to give the young master his present now? So I might see him open it." She said with a grin as to dispel the suddenly solemn feeling in the room – a feeling that told them all they were now on separate paths.

"I don't see too much of a problem with that Jane." he nodded, seeing his sons face flush with pleasure.

"It is not much sir but it is something."

She was right- but her gift had much meaning. She had embroidered him a book mark herself, a brilliant blue dragon flying across it. "Now you are a Ravenclaw." She explained.

But not only that, but a box of Chocolate Frogs also. He threw his arms about her, but did not know how grateful he had to be to her yet: for she had answered the question which had been laying heavy on his mind.

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An: Sorry it took so long to get this up, when I got back it took a couple of days to get back into the swing of things!