(Disclaimer: Although I bear the name and likeness of the AI host of the Fox Reality original program, I am not affiliated with Fox Reality or its parent company the News Corporation.)
Previously, on Solitary, my sleep deprivation Treatment continued to torment my guests. Numbers 1 and 5 quit, but were permitted to stay. Afterward, I tried to recalibrate the players' internal clocks with an annoying buzzing at regular intervals. Then I put their warped time sense to the Test. Number 2 rang in closest to two hours, and won freedom from the next Treatment. The rest of my guests found themselves rapidly gaining weight, and trying to stay on their feet. Some were more resilient than others, but after nine rounds, Number 1 lost her footing. She became the second demigod to leave Solitary forever.
Six guests remain under the pressure of my Treatment, unaware that someone else has already quit. Currently, each of them is carrying 50 pounds. How much more weight must I pile on before they all collapse?
"Guests, when you hear the buzzer, you will be permitted to rest again before the next round. Ready?"
BUZZ
My guests all dropped their backpacks. This time, even my strongest guests took a moment to lick their wounds. Number 4 dropped to her knees and breathed. Number 9 collapsed in a heap. And Number 3 sat and stretched his legs.
Numbers 5, 7, and 8 were not much better. These three seem to have lost the will to continue.
"I just don't know if I can make it through one more round," said Number 5. "Oh my gods, I can't feel my legs anymore!"
"This is not good," said Number 7. "My strength is leaving me. I can feel it."
"It's just mind over matter," said Number 8. "I have to believe that my massive mental endurance can overcome my weak physique. If I didn't believe that, I'd have pushed that red button already."
"For the next round, you will be carrying 60 pounds. Please add the weight to your backpack now."
They did as instructed.
"Ready, set, lift!"
While the rest of my guests were able to lift their newly heavy bags without incident, Number 5 did something unexpected. When she jerked her backpack up, her legs failed her. She dropped the bag, and fell face first on the pod floor. She did not get up, but instead made a noise that could either be laughing or crying, I still don't know which.
"Number 5, if you wish to continue in this Treatment, you must put the backpack on and stand."
"No. No mas, señor. My body has quit for me. I quit this Treatment."
"Number 5, if you wish to quit this Treatment, you must get up and push the red button."
"I would, VAL, believe me. But I don't think I can get up. So, uh…" Number 5 slapped the floor of her pod twice. "There, that's me tapping out. Will that count?"
"It's okay, Number 5. I understand you have no strength left. I only hope you understand what quitting this Treatment means."
"Yeah. If I quit first, I have to go home."
"Number 5, you are…not the first person to quit. Your stay in Solitary will continue."
"Yippee."
"You do not seem overly excited about this."
"Too weak to care."
"Recorded."
Five guests remain, and still have a lot more weight to throw around. But first, I wonder if my guests can survive wearing 60 pounds of extra weight.
Number 7 seems to be in absolute agony. About five minutes into the round, he did something I found quite odd. He pushed the green button instead of the red button.
"Number 7, if you wish to quit this Treatment, you have to push the red button."
"I don't want to quit. I just want to use the restroom. May I?"
"Number 7, the standing rule of Solitary is that the restroom is closed during Treatments. If you want to go to the restroom, you have to quit this Treatment first."
"Fine, then. I quit."
He pushed the red button, and the quit siren played. He shook off the backpack and started doing the pee-pee dance.
"You must have to go to the bathroom really bad, if you're willing to give up fifty thousand dollars for it."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, if I'm the first to quit, I go home, if not, I stay, can we speed this up a little, I'm about to wet my pants!"
"Number 7…go use the restroom already."
"Thank you, VAL!"
After he did his business, I caught up with him in his anti-pod.
"Feel better?" I asked him.
"Yes, VAL."
"You realize that this little trip to the restroom could mean your stay in Solitary will end, right?"
"I know, VAL. You don't have to tell me seventy times."
"Number 7, you are…not the first person to quit."
"Great. Another round for Number 7. Praise Olympus!"
Four guests remain. Will anyone else quit with 60 pounds? Or will I have to pile on more? Maybe not, if Number 8 is any indication. Her face is one of unimaginable pain.
"Guest assessment mode, guest Number equals 8. Are you at the end of your rope yet?"
"Not yet, VAL. I can last a little bit longer."
"Are you in pain?"
"My back hurts like Hades, and my knees feel like they're going to pop out, or something. I think I'm about to hit the wall, VAL."
"Recorded."
Number 9 is also straining under the 60 pounds.
"My shoulders hurt, my neck hurts, and the hurt has migrated to my head, and that's what irritates me."
"Do you not like headaches?"
"No. Not one little bit. If I quit this Treatment, it's probably going to be over my head than over the weight."
"Fascinating. I will look forward to that."
Number 9 chuckled.
"Guests, you may take another break in three, two, one…"
BUZZ
Number 8 collapsed. Number 4 stretched. Number 3 slumped again his pod wall. Number 9 massaged his head.
"Round eleven. You will now carry 75 pounds."
Number 8 laughed manically. "Okay, somebody had to have quit by now." She stood up and crossed to the red button. "I quit this Treatment."
She pushed the button, and the quit siren played.
"Number 8, you were…not the first person to quit."
"Yes! I knew it! WHOO!"
With Number 8 out, three of my guests continue to carry the weight of my Treatment.
"Round eleven begins, now."
Number 3 is wearing his exhaustion on his face. "Man, this is really tough," he said. "I thought I'd be stronger than this."
Number 4 is grizzled with determination. "I will not quit this Treatment. I will not quit any Treatment."
Number 9 is still massaging his head. "I'm just trying to dull the pain, so it doesn't take over."
At this point in the Treatment, my guests have been standing for two hours straight, and are carrying more weight than any high school student should be expected to. In addition, the cumulative effect of this Treatment has left them at a fraction of their normal strength. I predict they will all quit before I can unleash the next round.
Number 9 certainly seems close to cracking. The weight of his pack is making him want to kneel. But he's resisting, knowing it's against the rules. And yet, his strength is failing him.
"My legs feel like jell-o right now, VAL," he told me. "Seriously, I don't think I can stan-WHOA!" He certainly couldn't stand. He collapsed in mid-sentence. He muttered something I couldn't translate. With his backpack off, he shuffled on his knees to the red button.
"I quit."
The quit siren played as he pushed the red button.
"Number 9, you are…not the first guest to quit."
"Yes! Yes, yes, yes!"
Only Number 3 and Number 4 remain in my Treatment. I am curious to see which of these two is stronger, so I will let them sweat it out a while longer. Number 4 looks like she's on the brink.
"Guest assessment mode, guest Number equals 4. Are you okay?"
"Define 'okay', VAL."
"Are you close to pushing the red button?"
"No way. I'm strong enough to handle this Treatment."
"Your breathing is quite labored. Are you in pain?"
"Pain is life, VAL. You just gotta push through it."
"Recorded."
"Number 3, how are you feeling?"
"My whole body just hurts all over."
"Is this the same feeling you had when you 'held up the sky'?"
"I think it is. Yeah, except I only had to endure that for a couple of minutes."
"Only a couple of minutes? You didn't mention that before."
"Oh, crap, my legs just went numb. And, here I go…"
Number 3 pitched forward, and fell flat on his face. He pounded his fist into the floor. Then, he rolled over, threw his backpack off, and crawled to the red button.
"I quit."
"Number 3, you talked a big game going into this Treatment. What happened?"
"I don't know. I thought I was a lot stronger than this, I really did."
"You realize that if you are the first to quit this Treatment, your stay in Solitary will be over."
"Man, that would suck. Leaving on this particular Treatment, I mean."
"Number 3, you are…not the first guest to quit."
"Yay. I get to stay, and be tortured another day."
"Yes, yes you do."
Number 4 has outlasted all the other guests in this Treatment. She has proven herself the strongest of all my guests. I will inform her of this soon enough, but first, I will have a little fun with her…
"Your attention please. The next round will begin shortly. In it, you will be carrying three times the weight you carried in this round. That's 225 pounds, in case you can't do the math."
"Aha!" Number 4 clapped her hands, and smiled a knowing smile. "Bring it on! 225 pounds? I bench press more than that! Come on, VAL!"
"Very well, Number 4. You mock me, so I up the ante. 375 pounds, that's what you will carry."
"375, huh? That's more than twice my body weight. A walk in the park. Easy-peasy as can beasy."
"The next round begins…when falcons take commercial aircraft. This Treatment is now concluded."
"HA! I knew it! I knew it from the moment you said 225. VAL, you sick joker, you."
"Number 4, I thought you might like to know that you outlasted every other guest in this Treatment."
"What? No way, even Number 3?"
"Especially Number 3."
"Yeah! Suck on that, Seaweed Brain! Who's the top? Who's the best? It's Number 4, that's who!"
Number 4 began dancing around her pod while praising herself endlessly. A well deserved victory celebration for a guest who's had nothing but failure up to this point. While Number 4 shakes her booty, the rest of my guests are recovering from the Treatment.
"My back still hurts," said Number 7. "And now, the pain is shooting down to my butt."
"My head is still throbbing," said Number 9. "I think I need a nap."
"The feeling has not yet returned to my legs," said Number 5. "I don't think I will be getting up any time soon."
"I'm not really in any localized pain," said Number 8. "I'm just wiped out."
"Your injuries fascinate me, guests. I believe a brief sleep cycle may be the cure for what ails you."
"Thanks, VAL," said Number 5. "No need to pull the bed out, I'm just going to crash right here."
"I was not planning to pull it out anyway."
I turned out all the lights in their pods, and let them all sleep on the floor of the pod. Even Number 2, who was exempt from the Treatment, got a little shut-eye. After two hours, I woke them up.
"Good morning/evening/afternoon, guests. I have some news for you. The guest eliminated in my heavy backpack Treatment was…Number 1, the child of Aphrodite."
"HA!" Number 9 bellowed. "Yeah, get that weak stuff outta here, VAL!"
"I'm not surprised," said Number 4. "Even mortals are stronger than those poofters."
"Number 5 is still here?" asked Number 8. "He must be a male, because a female mortal could not last that long in here."
"And another demigod bites the dust," mused Number 5. "I wonder if these challenges weren't specifically designed to give mortals the upper hand."
"Let me assure you that every aspect of Solitary was designed with the sole purpose of furthering my experiment."
Of course, every so often, I present the guests with a Test or Treatment that exploits the documented weaknesses of most demigods. But, just like my last Treatment, I also have ones that play to their strengths. I believe Number 5 has about as much chance of winning as anyone else. And that chance is one out of seven.
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Coming up, VAL shuts down the Solitary kitchen, and the guests react.
"Feed me, VAL!" Number 3 said in a modulated voice.
Then, with freedom and a delicious meal at stake, VAL tests the guest's commitment to Olympus.
"Olympus is corrupt!" Number 9 shouts.
Then, they want food? They get food, and get it, and get it, and get it, until someone screams "I quit!"
That data, and more, when Solitary reboots.