Thirty-One Things that Spock will Never Do
By: Maranni123
Original List by: lolitaxlolita from DeviantART
Chapter Two
Disclaimer: Now, this one kind of kicked my ass for a few days, but I did get it done and although I'm a bit unsure about it, I do hope you guys like it. :D Un-betaed as usual, so please point out all mistakes. A shout out to all the people who reviewed. Honestly, I didn't think anyone would like this. XP Enjoy!
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The Second Thing that Spock will Never Do: Slap McCoy in the face with a glove and challenge him to a duel.
Jim was literally bouncing with excitement as he stepped onto the bridge, Spock and McCoy behind him.
"Good morning everyone," the young captain sang out happily.
The crew all turned to welcome their captain aboard with equally bright smiles and Sulu jumped up from the captain's chair and bowed as he grandly reached out a hand towards his captain.
"My Captain," Sulu proclaimed with a dramatic flare. "Your throne awaits you."
Jim ate it up like candy.
Holding up his head high with pride, Jim took Sulu's out-stretched hand to allow the helmsman to guide him to his "throne". McCoy let out a small groan as he and Spock followed, the half-Vulcan surprisingly showing no signs of embarrassment or discomfort. All around them, yeomen and lieutenants alike were trying to hold in their very unprofessional giggles at the sight of their Captain, First Officer and CMO. After all, it wasn't every day that your commanding officer's came to work dressed in 18th century clothing. Although, all the females aboard, as well as a good number of men, would admit that the waistcoats and stockings did look pretty damn sexy.
Uhura rolled her eyes fondly at her captain and gave Spock a small wave, one which he returned with a warm nod. Although their romantic relationship had ended prior to the start of the Enterprise's five year mission, the two officers had made sure that the relationship had ended well enough that they could continue to be friends, Spock being extremely grateful for it. He valued Uhura's friendship immensely and was pleased to see that Uhura valued his friendship just as well.
Jim sat down in the captain's chair with a rather dramatic sigh and waved a hand at Sulu.
"You are dismissed, good sir," he stated regally, his smile ruining in the effect.
Sulu bit his lip to hold in his laughter and he bowed again. "As you wish, my Lord," he answered, before he made his way back to the navigation station where Chekov, who looked as if he were about to chew off his own bottom lip, was waiting for him.
Jim glanced over to McCoy, who was standing on his left, scowling at the air while he tugged at his dark navy waistcoat.
"I like that," he said cheerfully. "'My Lord'. You should all start calling me that."
McCoy didn't answer. Instead, he just continued to pull and tug at his clothing. Spock, however, having been caught in a fairly good mood when the Jim had come into his quarters with their costumes, decided to humor his Captain. With a slight lift of his eyebrow, Spock turned to give Jim a small bow.
"As you wish," he said softly, only the barest amount of humor evident in his voice. "My Lord."
Jim and McCoy both turned to give Spock a surprised stare before Jim broke out into one of the biggest smiles Spock had ever seen. The crew just continued to snicker quietly.
The three men did look rather dashing however, despite the crew's obvious amusement. Jim was garbed in a golden waistcoat, with matching golden trousers and a ruffled pristine white undershirt, with a matching pair of white stockings. Spock and McCoy had donned similar clothing, only their waistcoats and trousers were blue instead of golden, like their captain. However, all three men were wearing shining black buckled shoes and all three were wearing spotless white gloves.
McCoy, unaffected by everyone else's good mood, scoffed.
"Damn it Jim," he mumbled. "I'm a doctor, not a clown!" He waved his hand over himself angrily. "Why do we even have to wear all this crap now?" he asked. "We're leaving for Romeilie in an hour!"
Jim simply gave Spock a waggle of his eyebrows and the half-Vulcan turned to McCoy with another small bow.
"We are currently wearing our costumes now Doctor," Spock explained. "Because it is only logical to, as you humans say, 'break in' our outfits before our mission."
McCoy rolled his eyes and gave Spock a glare. "Oh, who are you kidding ya green blooded hobgoblin," McCoy sneered, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're just saying that when really, the only reason why we're in these damn clothes is because Jim wanted to be a child and play dress up!"
Spock raised an eyebrow and Jim let out a small chuckle as Sulu let out a rather loud gasp.
"Oh dear," Uhura exclaimed, getting into the mood as well. "It appears as if the good Doctor has insulted our Lord, Spock!"
Chekov lifted his hand and let out a small giggle himself. "You must redeem him, Commander," the young ensign cried.
McCoy rolled his eyes again. "Oh, dear Lord," he grumbled, planting his face into his gloves. "Am I the only sane one on this damn ship?"
Jim gave Spock a wink before he raised his own gloved hand to his forehead, a look of disbelief printed on his face. "I have been disgraced," he exclaimed, leaning back into his chair. "My honor has been insulted! Spock, you must redeem my honor, as my First Officer!"
Spock, feeling a small bubble of humor rising in his chest, most likely from the happy humans around him, stared at Jim for a moment before he removed his hands from his back and pulled off one of his gloves. The crew watched, a grin plastered upon every face, as Spock took a few steps forward until he was standing in front of McCoy, who still had his face in his hands.
A few seconds passed and then everyone aboard gasped when Spock slapped McCoy across the face with his glove, startling the Doctor from his self-pity party. The surprise of the attack caused McCoy to take a few steps back from the captain's chair, his eyes wide with shock and disbelief. Everyone on the bridge watched with wide eyes as Spock slowly replaced his glove and pointed toward McCoy, his eyes stern and serious.
"For your disgraceful insults to our Captain," he declared loudly. "I challenge you, Doctor McCoy, to a duel!"
Silence filled the bridge, McCoy openly gawking at Spock with his mouth wide open. Then, breaking the silence, Jim nearly toppled out of his chair as laughter overtook him. As soon as Jim began to laugh, so did the rest of the crew. Uhura had her mouth covered as she chuckled quietly to herself while Sulu and Chekov held each other up, their laughter being too strong for them.
McCoy blinked, and then his face turned red as he glared at Spock, who was giving him his own Vulcan version of a smirk. "Are you serious?" the doctor screamed, holding onto his cheek.
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A/N: Well, there you go. Like I said, I'm not too sure about it, but I hope you guys like it. :D Spock's third thing he'll never do will be up soon! Good night everyone!