I know it's been way too long since I updated and I have no good excuse so I wont even try. I apologize for the delay but hopefully the chapter is worth the wait. My muse seems to be on vacation in a far off distance land I didn't want to force the story without her. Without further ado please enjoy the chapter.
"I wanted to prove that you could trust me." Callie says dejectedly as she looks at the rug.
Until now, Arizona had been struggling to figure out where all of this was coming from but at that statement she feels her stomach drop. That stupid fight at the hospital! Looking at crestfallen woman in front of her Arizona mentally berates herself. How could I have said that to her? I know that I had been thinking about it but I didn't have to be so harsh. How do I begin to fix this? Franticly trying to think of a way to comfort Callie, Arizona runs her hand down Callie's arm getting the Latina to look at her. "Calliope…" she says remorsefully.
"It's ok. I get it. I mean, you made a fair point." Breaking eye contact she continues. "When I stopped to think about it, I couldn't really blame you. It's like I said. You were always the strong one. You always took the first steps in our relationship." I shouldn't be surprised you don't trust me.
Seeing how deep her words had cut Arizona curses to herself. "You idiot."
"What?" Callie says looking up.
Not realizing she had spoken her thought out loud Arizona hurriedly responds. "Not you, me." She gestures to herself as she leans forward and drops her head into her hands. This is what I get for bottling everything up. I just preached to Calliope about not doing that and yet here I am. "I'm the idiot because I should have never said that to you. It wasn't fair." she mumbles looking at the floor.
Leaning back into the couch cushion Callie deadpans, "It's fair, if that's how I made you feel."
Lifting her head, Arizona sees the hurt in Callie's eyes. Time to tell the truth. Taking a deep breath she sits up quickly and runs her fingers through her hair. Turning to face Callie she begins. "You didn't make me feel that way but, I did feel that way."
"Huh?" the brunette asks.
Closing her eye out how ridiculous that sounded she tries again. "What I said to you about trust and proving that you loved me… that wasn't because of something you did." It's because I have trust issues.
Sitting up slightly Callie doubtfully looks at her girlfriend. "Really?" she says sarcastically. Now she's just trying to make me feel better. "Because it sure sounded like it was because of me when you very quickly listed off all of my failed relationships." she states unable to keep a hint of anger out of her voice. I know she has a point but still.
Arizona's shoulders drop knowing the dark haired women is right. After a long pause she finally speaks. "You're right. I did make it sound that way but it wasn't the truth… well not the whole truth." This is really about my past.
Although Callie is unconvinced she is intrigued by Arizona's statement and allows her to continue without protest. "Alright, then what is the whole truth?"
Looking around the room as if the words she's trying to say will magically be written down somewhere Arizona stutters. "Well, the truth is… I mean the reason for…It's just that… argh!" she finishes in frustration. Why is this so difficult?
Callie knows this is an important conversation but she can't help but laugh at how cute Arizona looks when she's frustrated. "You wanna try that again?" she asks with a smile.
Looking at Callie, Arizona feels her frustration melt away at the full fledged smile her girlfriend is giving her. Briefly laughing at herself she nods. Pausing for a moment to collect her thoughts, Callie shifts on the couch so that she is completely facing her. "I know all about your past relationships right?" Arizona asks.
"Yeah" Callie responds not expecting the question.
"Did you ever wonder why you don't know anything about mine?" she asks almost unsure of herself.
Callie looks back at Arizona with a mixture of confusion and surprise. "Well, I guess I never really thought about it." But she's right. I really don't know anything about her history. Not wanting to push Arizona but now incredibly curious she gently asks, "Would you like to tell me about them?"
Hearing the genuine curiosity in her voice Arizona knows this isn't about just who she dated before. This is about Calliope just wanting to get to know to her better. "Well I've obviously been in relationships before." Oh good start Arizona. Let's just state the obvious all night. Trying to quite her mocking internal voice she continues. "Most were casual but a few were serious, you know?" Callie nods her head encouraging Arizona to continue. "Well, two were really serious." And they both broke my heart. Momentarily losing herself in memories she sees Callie patiently waiting for her to continue.
"Umm…" Arizona trails off as she struggles to think of the words to say. I don't want to go into details but I need to tell her enough so she understands where I'm coming from. Finally feeling as though she has an idea of what to say she begins again. "I met Laura in college. She was pre-med like me and so we became study partners. We hung out a lot and then one night in her dorm room she kissed me. After that we were together all the time and it was wonderful." Arizona gauges Callie's expression and is relieved to see that Callie is calmly but attentively listening. "We dated through out all of college and I thought we were in love but then came medical school." Arizona says unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice.
Callie supportively listens to every word not wanting to interrupt Arizona. I can't believe I never asked her about this before. Hearing the pain in Arizona voice as she recaps the events, Callie guesses what happened next. "She broke up with you after graduation?" she asks cautiously.
An empty laugh escapes Arizona as she glances out the window. "I wish. That would have been better." Bringing her attention back to Callie she continues with her story. "We went to different med schools but stayed together and did the long distance relationship. I knew it would be hard but we loved each other so what could a few hundred miles do?" The hurt was evident in her voice as she mutters to herself, "I was naïve and stupid."
Callie places her hand on Arizona knee in a comforting gesture. "What happened?"
"I had just finished the first semester and I was flying out to see her. We hadn't seen each other in months so I decided to surprise her and I booked an early flight." Her face falls slightly as she relieves the memory. "When I got to her apartment and there was a party going on so I was able to walk right in. I didn't want to look for her with all of my bags so I went to her room to drop them off." Pausing slightly Arizona's voice loses all emotion as she continues. "I found her very heavily making out with some girl on her bed. When she saw me she at least had the decency to look guilty." I'll never get that image out of my head.
"Ari, I'm sorry." Callie whispers. I want to strangle that stupid girl for hurting you.
Seeing Callie upset for her makes Arizona briefly smile before she continues. "I turned around and left but she followed me. She told me she was sorry and that she was going to tell me tomorrow when I arrived. I asked her why? I thought we were in love?" Arizona pauses as she repeats the words she wishes she could forget. "That's when Laura told me, 'Zona, we were in love and it was fun but it wasn't the forever kind of love. I mean you're great but be reasonable, people fall in and out of love all the time.' That's the last time we spoke." She finishes waiting for Callie's reaction.
Callie feels rage pass through her as she listens to Arizona describe how this girl just dismissed her without a second thought. How could she break Ari's heart so carelessly? And what is with that stupid nickname of Zona? Seeing Arizona waiting for response Callie says the first thing that comes to mind. "Do you want me to kick her ass?" she asks.
Arizona looks at her in surprise before she bursts out laughing. This is why I love her. "Calliope." She says trying to sounding to scolding but the laughter is still evident in her voice.
Relieved that Arizona is laughing but partially serious about inflicting bodily harm she continues. "I won't do any permanent damage and if I break one of her bones I'll set it myself. Free of charge."
Still smiling Arizona is touched at what Callie is saying. "Calliope, it's fine. It was long time ago."
"I know but I don't like the thought of anyone hurting you. Especially since I know how awesome you are." She says with a twinkle in her eye. "I mean great?" Callie quotes with displeasure remembering the word Laura used when she broke Arizona's heart. "Great doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of describing you. You're amazing and fantastic and wonderful and incredible and-"
"Ok, I get it." Arizona interrupts with a smile as a blush overtakes her cheeks. She's the only one who can make me blush like this. "I'm awesome."
"Yeah, you are." Callie states matter-of-factly while looking into Arizona's eyes. "So, I guess this is why you don't believe in long distance relationships?"
"Pretty much. It just shocked me I suppose. I thought everything was fine and that love was enough but…" Arizona trails off hoping that Callie understands what she's trying to say. I want to trust in love but sometimes love isn't enough.
Finishing Arizona's sentence Callie says, "But it wasn't." Leaning closer to look right into Arizona's eyes Callie's voice takes on a quiet intensity as she speaks. "Love is enough for us. Me and you," she says gesturing between them, "This is the forever kind of love. And I know you're worried that I'm like Laura with the–"
"You're nothing like her." Arizona quickly interjects hating to have Calliope compare herself to Laura. "I know you'd never cheat on me." She says firmly.
Callie smiles at the interruption. "Well of course I wouldn't. My girlfriend is a sex goddess." she says breaking the tension and bringing a smile to Arizona's face. "But I figured you already knew that."
The sudden change of topic causes Arizona to get lost in lustful thoughts of the two of them. Seeing Callie waiting for a response she dazedly says., "That you think I'm a sex goddess?"
Callie can't help but laugh. "Well, maybe not that part but, just for the record you are. I meant that I figured you knew I would never cheat on you."
"I do know that." She replies confidently. I've never doubted that.
"Good. So that's not what I was referring to when I said you're worried I'm like Laura." Callie watches as Arizona's attempts to figure out what she's talking about. I hope I'm right about this. Taking a breath and keeping her eyes on her girlfriend she says, "Laura was in love with being in love, right? And you're worried I'm the same."
Arizona's first reaction is to deny any similarities between Calliope and Laura but as she opens her mouth to protest she sees the determined look on Callie's face. Pausing Arizona says nothing and slowly closes her mouth as she ponders the statement. Is she right? Of course she is Arizona you flat out told her that you thought she was in love with love and not you. But that's not true. She's nothing like Laura or Rebecca or anyone else I've dated. She challenges me and supports me and she never gives up on us. Why couldn't I see that before? Why did it take her risking her life for me to get it? Re-focusing her attention Arizona sees Calliope anxiously watching her and waiting for a response.
Callie never takes her eyes off Arizona as she waits with baited breath while Arizona contemplates what was just said. I either hit the nail on the head or I pissed her off. I really hope it's the first one. Please just say something.
Unsure of what to say but wanting to ease the anxiety in Callie, Arizona struggles to think of an appropriate response. Reaching out to cup Callie's cheek Arizona gently runs her thumb along the cheekbone before dropping her hand and sighing. "I guess when you put it that way, you're right." she says reluctantly. I did think that but I never should have.
Callie stays frozen in place not sure of how to react. Arizona's touch made her hope but her words caused doubt. Does she believe I love her or not? Desperate to know the answer she forlornly asks, "Does that mean you think I'm in love with being in love?"
Knowing it hurt Callie to even ask that question Arizona leans in and gently kisses her lips lingering for a moment before pulling back and answering softly, "No. It means that I did think that but I don't anymore." I swear I'm going to stop doubting how you feel about me.
Breathing a sigh of relief Callie looks Arizona squarely in the eye and asks, "Why?" I know this is me just being insecure but I have to know what changed her mind. "Why don't you think that anymore?" Arizona sits up straighter at the question. "Don't get me wrong I'm happy you believe me but I need to know why now?"
"Oh, well…" Arizona stutters at the unexpected question. Of course she wants to know why. It looks like I changed my mind all of sudden. How do I begin to explain this? "I'm not sure how to phrase it. It was just you being you."
Dropping her eyes Callie responds somberly, "I was always me just being me and that didn't seem to be enough."
Arizona's face falls at those words. "You were always enough for me." She replies resolutely looking at Callie.
Without even blinking Callie looks back at her and grimly says "The evidence would suggest otherwise." Breaking their eye contact she turns towards the window and rests her elbows on her knees as she leans forward. "I don't want to fight or open up old wounds but Arizona…" she trails off pausing to contemplate if she wants to say this aloud. I have to. Taking a breath and focusing her gaze strait ahead on the window she continues in a broken tone, "When you said that you didn't believe I'm in love with you, it hurt. I mean, really hurt because I had no idea that you doubted me. I thought that you knew I loved you… I thought I made that obvious." Still refusing to look at over at the blonde Callie feels the couch shift indicting that Arizona was getting up. Wonderful, I open my big mouth and upset both of us. Thinking that Arizona was walking away, Callie closes her eyes in disappointment as she drops her head muttering, "I guess I was the naïve one."
Arizona feels terrible as she listens to Callie. Seeing the love of her life unwilling to look at her and hearing the hurt in her voice makes Arizona furious with herself. What did I do? Unable to just sit there any longer she stands up to move into Callie's line of sight but pauses when Callie stops talking. Not thinking that Callie would misunderstand her movement as leaving, Arizona is surprised when the brunette drops her head in defeat and mutters, "I guess I was the naïve one."
At those words something inside Arizona snaps. I will not be responsible for breaking her heart again! Immediately dropping to her knees in front of Callie she fiercely whispers, "No, you weren't" before pulling Callie into a searing kiss.
Callie's whole body goes still in complete shock, as Arizona unexpectedly kisses her with an intense passion. I thought she was leaving? Trying to wrap her mind around this surprising turn of events Callie sits there frozen in surprise. A moment ago I think she's upset and now she kissing me.
Unwilling to pull away at Callie's lack of movement Arizona swiftly wraps her arms around the brunette's waist and pulls Callie to the edge of the couch bringing their bodies flush against one another. Beginning to panic at Calliope's lack of response, Arizona traces her tongue along Callie's bottom lip desperately begging for entry. Please forgive me.
Feeling the desperation in Arizona's kiss as the blonde holds her tighter; Callie's brain finally catches up. She immediately tangles her hand in Arizona's hair and wraps the other around her waist pressing their bodies firmly together. Opening her mouth Callie's tongue searches for Arizona's feeling a jolt of electricity when they meet. Battling for control Callie lets out a groan as she feels Arizona arch against her bringing their cores in contact and causing heat to pool between her legs.
Arizona's kisses only further intensify when she feels Callie respond. Desperate to show Callie how she feels and erase any pain she arches into her eliciting a groan from the taller women. Sucking on Callie's tongue Arizona runs her hands along Callie's body wanting to touch her everywhere. It's been so long. Breaking the kiss Arizona trails kisses down Callie's throat pausing to gently suck on the skin above the swell of her breasts.
Callie's breath catches in her throat as she feels Arizona's kisses go lower and lower down her neck. Closing her eyes in pleasure she lets Arizona continue until she is unable to stand not kissing her. Pulling the blonde back up Callie possessively claims her lips causing Arizona to tremble from the fervor.
A series of mind-blowing and frenzied kisses continue as the two women reassure each other of their feelings. In the back of Callie's mind she knows that they longer they kiss the less likely they are to ever finish the conversation they truly need to have but feeling Arizona's warm body against hers makes it impossible to want to pull away. Just a few more kisses. Callie lets out a whimper when Arizona's hand begins play with the hem of tee-shirt. Leaning forward she uses her weight to gently push Callie back against the couch cushions. I have to stop now or I'll never be able to. Pulling her lips away slightly Callie manages to get out, "Arizona." However, it comes out as moan since Arizona's hand had made its way under Callie's shirt and was softly massaging her breast. Oh God, that feels good.
Unaware of Callie's attempts to end their kissing Arizona only gets more encouraged as she hears Calliope moan. Grinning to herself she tweaks Callie's nipple into a hard peak. I love her. She needs to know. Wanting to prove her love, Arizona moves her hips against Callie's creating a delicious friction.
Quickly losing her grasp on reality Callie momentarily considers giving in as she arches her hips against Arizona's feeling another bolt of pleasure go through her. This feels so good. Torn between wanting to make love or finish their conversation Callie knows that the later is more important. The physical part of our relationship has never been an issue. Tearing her lips away from Arizona's she knows that as much as she wants to lose herself in Arizona they need to talk first. "Wait, wait." she says breathlessly already missing the taste of Arizona's lips.
Surprised to feel Callie pull away, Arizona pauses slightly. Her heart pounding in her chest she moves back just a fraction and breathes out, "Why?"
Hearing the desire in voice makes Callie even more turned on. Dropping her head back on the couch she forces herself to say, "Because we need to finish our conversation."
Sighing in disappointment Arizona slides her hand out from under Callie's shirt and shifts to the side so that she isn't completely on top of her. "I know we do" she begrudgingly admits. She's right. I know she's right but I want to make love to her so bad. Giving one more attempt to continue kissing she seductively says "But actions do speak louder than words."
Feeling another rush of desire course through her body Callie slowly whines "Arizona," as she sits up to literally put some distance between them before her resolve crumbles. This woman is going to be the death of me.
Knowing that Callie is right Arizona suppresses the urge to follow her to the other side of the couch and kiss her senseless. Taking a calming breath to squelch her desire she also sits up maintaining the distance between then. Touching her is not going to lead to a conversation. Seeing Callie's uneven breathing and flushed faced causes another wave of longing to pass through her as she thinks of all things she wants to do. My girlfriend is so hot.
After several moments Callie finally feels calm enough to look at Arizona without wanting to jump her bones. However, one glance at Arizona's lustful gaze and Callie's control falters. We need to talk. We need to talk. She repeats in head trying to stay strong. Then we'll have sex until neither of us can move. "You can't look at me like that." Callie says exasperatedly.
"Why not?" Arizona asks, pushing away the image of water running over Calliope's body.
"Because I know that look." Callie says pointedly. "That look usually ends with us in the shower." Which sounds amazing. Focus Torres, we have to talk first. Then sex, lots and lots of sex.
Arizona just smiles at how well Callie knows her. Running her fingers through her hair and taking another breathe to settle herself she remembers what brought on the intense kissing in first place. I hurt her. Immediately Arizona's guilt returns full force like a bucket of ice water being dumped on her. "Do you think I'm a terrible person?" she asks in a small voice.
Callie's eyebrows rise in surprise. "What? Of course not."
"Are you sure?" Sitting back on the couch and bringing her knees up to her chest she continues. "I've broken your heart, made you cry, doubted that you love me and then basically gave you an ultimatum to prove your love." Looking over with sad eyes and weak smile she quietly says, "That sure sounds like something a terrible person would do."
"Ari, you're not a terrible person." Callie says reassuringly as she shifts on the couch to get more comfortable. With a growing smile she says, "You make me feel loved and special every time you look at me. You made me the happiest I've ever been in whole my life when you said we'd have a family together." Moving closer and looking into her girlfriend's eyes Callie tries to ease the guilt she sees there. "We've both broken each other's hearts and been responsible for tears but that was in the past. Besides, a terrible person wouldn't feel terrible about being terrible." She finishes hoping to elicit a small chuckle but unfortunately Arizona's troubled expression remains.
"What about my doubting? What about the ultimatum?" She responds needing to know how upset Callie was about what she said at the hospital. I know I would still be mad.
Sinking back into the couch Callie leans her head back and stares at the ceiling. "I don't know." she says somberly. Letting the words hang between them Callie feels Arizona watching her. Why does this have to be so difficult? "You say that you believe me when I tell you I love you…"
"I do." Arizona responds immediately causing Callie to pick her up head and look over at her. Please believe me. "I know you love me." she says seriously.
"But why?" Callie says pleadingly. Searching her girlfriend's face in the hopes of finding an answer she lets out a sigh. "Arizona, I need to know why now? A few hours ago me just being me wasn't enough to convince you and now all of sudden it is?" Crap, that came out sounding angry. "I'm not saying that I don't believe you." Callie continues in a much softer voice letting Arizona know that she's not mad. "I just really need to know what changed your mind."
"You saved my life." Arizona says matter-of-factly. How can she not know this? Turning her body towards Callie's she locks eyes with her. "You put yourself between me and gun. You risked your life to save mine just minutes after I yelled at you." She says in amazement. I just hope you didn't do that to prove you love me. "How could I possibly doubt that you love me after that?"
"Oh." Callie utters in surprise. I guess that would do it. I just never really thought about it that way. "Well, all right then. Mystery solved." She says jokingly but Arizona doesn't laugh. In fact she just sits there fidgeting with her hands. "Arizona?"
Looking down Arizona musters up the courage to ask, "Did you do it because of our fight?"
Confusion spreads across Callie's face. "Did I do what because our fight?"
Looking back up at Callie with an unreadable expression Arizona quickly speaks in a single breath. "Did you risk your life because of our fight? Did you rush to protect me because you wanted me to believe that you loved me? Did you almost die because I was selfish enough to demand that you prove you love me?" Finally taking a breath she looks away from Callie's flabbergasted expression. "Please tell me you didn't." she finishes softly. I'll never forgive myself if you almost died because of that stupid fight.
"Arizona" Callie calls to her but the blonde refuses to lift her eyes. She's blaming herself for something that didn't even happen. "Hey, will you please look at me?" Arizona lifts her gaze to meet Callie's. "The truth is… I don't know." Arizona's expression falls slightly. Choose your words wisely Torres, she's fragile right now. "I know that you want me to say that our fight had nothing to do with my protecting you but I can't tell you that."
"So you did do it to prove you love me?" She asks miserably. Great job Arizona. Nearly get the love of your life killed because you don't believe she loves you. "I'm sorry. I never meant–" but Arizona falls silence as Callie gently places a finger on her lips.
"Don't you think we've apologized enough for one day?" she asks with a smile. "And I didn't say that I did protect you because of the fight. I said that I can't tell you I didn't." Callie finishes as she removes her finger from Arizona's lips.
"I don't understand." Arizona replies.
"Ari, it was a reaction." Callie says with a shrug. "I didn't have time to process my reasons for it. All I knew was that I couldn't let anything happen to you."
"And proving that you loved me had nothing to do with?" Arizona asks doubtfully.
"I didn't say that." Callie responds with a sigh. "I really don't know. I guess maybe it had something to do with it." She says unsurely. I don't know the right thing to say. Leaning into the couch she sees Arizona close her eyes in disappointment at that comment. And clearly that was not it. "Why does it matter anyways? The point it that were both safe."
"Why does it matter?" Arizona says with her voice rising. "It matters because my stupid words nearly got you killed. It matters because you should have never felt that you had to do that to convince me." She says with anger directed at herself. You idiot! You just had to make her prove she loves you. What is this the second grade? You're supposed to work with kids not act like one.
"Stop it." Callie's commanding voice pulls Arizona away from her berating thoughts. "Stop beating yourself up for something that didn't happen." Reaching over she takes Arizona's hand and places it on her cheek. "See. I'm here, I'm fine."
"No thanks to me." Arizona bitterly replies.
"Argh! What can I do to make you understand?" Callie exclaims in frustration. This is getting ridiculous.
Suddenly standing up she pulls Arizona with her so they are facing each other with barely a foot of space between them. "What would you do if someone came through that door and tried to hurt me?" she asks as she points to the door in her apartment.
Confused at the change in conversation Arizona answers, "I don't know… stop them?" Callie fixes her with a look serious look. "I'd protect you." She admits.
"Right. You'd protect me on instinct." Callie tells her. "Now, what if I told you that I needed to be convinced that you loved me? What if I asked you to prove it and then 20 minutes later someone came through that door trying to hurt me. Would you react any differently?"
Arizona inwardly cringes as she hears Callie repeat the demands she had made of her. Is this what it felt like for her? Even though she's not really asking, it still stings. Pushing away those thoughts she replies. "Of course not, I'd still protect you."
Smiling Callie then says, "And would you being doing it because you were trying to prove you loved me?"
"Yes. No. Maybe?" Arizona stumbles over her words as she tries to determine what her motivation would be. Would it be about proving my love? No, I'd just want to protect her which would prove I love her but that wouldn't be the reason behind my actions. Giving a slight chuckle she smiles at Callie. "Ok, you win." Arizona admits as she put her hands on Callie's waist gently pulling her closer. "I wouldn't know either. I'd just want to keep you safe."
Dropping a kiss on Arizona's nose Callie pulls back to look her in the eyes. "So do you understand now?"
Unable to resist stealing a kiss Arizona leans in a brushes her lips against Callie's. "Yes, I understand now. I just needed to know that it wasn't solely because of the fight." She says leaning her forehead against Callie's.
Breathing in the familiar scent of Arizona relaxes Callie as she wraps her arms around the smaller women. "It wasn't. Keeping you safe is something I'll always do."
Arizona slightly nods her head. "I love you" she whispers.
Callie smiles at those words. I'll never get tired of hearing her say that. "I love you too."
Arizona tilts her head up to place a ghost of kiss on Callie's lips before she leans back to look into her eyes. She needs to hear this. "I know you do" she tells her meaningfully. Callie's smile widens as she moves to pull her close again but Arizona stands firm wanting to make sure Callie really understands.
A look of confusion crosses Callie's face as Arizona refuses to budge. Bringing her hand up to cup Callie's cheek Arizona continues speaking with soft determination. "I need to make sure you hear me. I know you love me." I don't want her to ever doubt this again. Braking their embrace to sit back down Arizona tugs on Callie's hand to have her sit down as well. Arizona slowly brings Callie's hand up to her lips and places a soft kiss on it. "I know you love me and it has nothing to do with what happened at the hospital."
Callie gives her a quizzical expression and opens her mouth to speak but Arizona keeps talking. "I know I said that you saving me convinced me and I wont deny that it was a wake up call but I don't want you thinking that it's the only reason." It's everything about you. Taking in a breath she finally pours her heart out to Callie.
"I know you love me because of how you treat me. You support me and challenge me and protect me and comfort me. You make me laugh after a bad day but you're also willing to fight with me when I start a stupid argument because I'm upset about something else. You never give up on us. You never walk away." Gently squeezing her hand Arizona leans in closer as her voice gets overcome with emotion. "I know you love me. I can feel it every time you look at me. Every time you touch me." She says while running her thumb across the back of Callie's hand. "You make me feel cherished and desired and loved." Her voice slightly shakes as she continues. "I love you and I love how you love me. And I've never felt this way before, with anyone. Not Laura, not Rebecca, only you. And I was afraid that it wouldn't last. That something like before would happen, so I panicked." Looking into the astonished face of her girlfriend Arizona leans in so only a breath of space is between them, and with as much emotion as possible she states, "I know you love me."
Callie sits there in amazement as she listens to Arizona. I've never heard her talk like this. Falling even more in love as Arizona explains the way she makes her feel Callie squeezes her hand back. Almost afraid to breath for fear of distracting her Callie mutely listens, taking everything in. She really does believe me. She was just scared. What happened before and who is Rebecca? Callie's thoughts rapidly disappear as Arizona gets so close that Callie can feel her warm breath on her lips as Arizona assuredly whispers, "I know you love me." Leaning forward to close the fraction of space between them, she tenderly kisses Arizona. "Thank you. That was just…" I don't even know what to say. "That was… wow." Callie finishes breathlessly bringing a smile to Arizona's lips.
Unable to wipe the grin off her face Callie leans in to steal another kiss. "You really are awesome," she says with a smile as she pulls back. Arizona softly chuckles and tilts her head forward hide the faint blush that is creeping into her cheeks. Callie relishes in their tender moment before speaking again. For once the silence golden. Stealing one more quick kiss Callie then leans back into the couch cushions and pulls Arizona with her while draping her arm over the blonde's shoulders and pulling her in close. Arizona quickly responds by letting her head fall on Callie's shoulder and resting her arm across Callie's waist. Feeling Arizona so content against her brings another smile to Callie's face. She softly traces her fingers in a meaningless pattern over Arizona's arm before she speaks. "So I guess you kinda like me?" Callie says jokingly breaking the silence and she is rewarded with a chuckle from Arizona.
Snuggling closer to Callie, Arizona smiles and playfully answers, "Well, maybe just a little bit." It feels so good to have finally told her. Becoming serious once more Arizona assuredly says, "I meant every word."
At that statement Callie pulls her even closer and drops a kiss on her forehead. "I know you did and I can't even begin to tell you how much it means to me." It was amazing hearing her talk like that. Speaking tenderly Callie continues, "I wish I could articulate my feelings that well but right now words just seem to fail me."
Arizona tilts her head up to look at Callie before she speaks. "Actions speak louder words," she says with a smile.
I need to thank fcallit for giving me the kick in the pants I needed to update this story. I made sure not leave it on a cliffhanger this time because I have no idea when or if I'll add to this although it doesn't feel finished yet. Anyways, please review and let me know what you think.