"I swear to God," Lorelai muttered, stomping up the stairs. "I could just kill that kid right now! What the hell was she thinking?" she tore the door open and something fluttered to her feet. "Dead! So incredibly dead! My god, is she stupid?"
It could be for her and Jess, a voice in the back of her mind told her, calming her slightly, might not have anything to do with you.
But she only allowed herself to believe that for a few minutes while she got ready for bed then she stomped to her room, ripped the covers back and begged for sleep to come.
"She's not coming in." Jess announced as he kept watch.
"She will, trust me." Rory replied, not bothering to look.
"But she's been out there for over an hour, and she's not even close to the building."
"Trust m-"
"Stop telling me to trust you, I do trust you. But I'm telling you your mom is not coming in here."
Rory finally turned her attention to the street to see her mom pacing on the sidewalk, before Jimmy came and tapped her on the shoulder. "Damn it! She's not coming in."
"Told you,"
"Don't gloat. What is he doing here anyway?"
"Probably coming to say goodbye,"
"He has the worst timing in the world. Tell him that for me, will you?"
"Sure."
Rory walked away from the window, disgusted, as the door opened and closed. She watched as Luke, who was standing behind the counter, fiddling with a toaster, looked up for a second, before returning to his task. Damn it!
"You do know that in order to get coffee, food, warmth all that good stuff, you actually have to go inside, right?" Jimmy asked, coming to stand beside Lorelai.
"I can't."
"You can't… go inside?"
"Yep,"
"And why is that?"
"Because my feet are glued to the sidewalk, what do you think? Personal reasons; I just can't."
"Ok, ok. Don't bite my head off I just thought maybe we could grab one last coffee before I head off,"
"You're going already?"
"Yeah. Responsibilities, people, things to get back to, you know."
"Right, right, of course."
"So, what do you say? Coffee?"
"Ok,"
"Great," he headed for the door, but she quickly called him back.
"Just not in there."
"Lorelai come on! Why can't you go in? Yesterday, everything was great, I thought."
"It was. That was a great day with all the Christmas cheer, Sookie's news, but I still can't go in."
"Why-"
"Drive safe Jimmy, it was really great to see you." She cut him off and turned, walking away as fast as her frozen feet would carry her. Jimmy shook his head, confused, and continued on to the door.
"Rory's pissed at you," Jess informed him as soon as he came inside. "Just thought you should know,"
"Well, now if I could just get to Emily today will be a new record." Jimmy commented.
"I think Rory said that the Gilmores were out of town. Spending Christmas in Aspen or Prague or something,"
"Ah, yes, because good old-fashioned Connecticut snow, that's just so boring."
"So, I'm guessing your mood means that things didn't go too well out there with Lorelai?"
"I'm not in a mood," Jimmy objected, Jess just looked at him. "Well, ok, so maybe a little one. But I just don't- I don't get it. Yesterday, everyone was getting along; we were all happy, yes?"
"We were."
"And then today… I just must have missed something, I think."
"Don't take it personally, it was… Never mind. Next time I'm sure things will be better."
"Hmm,"
"There will be a next time won't there? You'll come for another visit? Soon,"
"Actually, there was something I wanted to talk to you about, if you've got a minute."
"I'll tell you right now I am against the move to Mexico, so don't even bother."
"No. It's nothing like that. Well, it's something like that, but not… We should have talked earlier, your mom too. I just, I wanted you to have a nice Christmas, you know."
"Dad what's going on?"
"I have been given an opportunity to move closer. On an almost permanent basis, and I wondered how you would feel about that."
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah. It wouldn't be right away, and I wouldn't be able to settle too soon either. Next six months or so, I could have myself set up in Boston, or something. How's that sound?"
"Freaking awesome!"
"You sound very pleased."
"That would be so cool."
"Great. And, look, I'm sorry we didn't get more of a chance to-"
"No, it's totally fine. There's only so much of you that a kid can take, you know?"
"Well, I'm honored you were able to stay in the room this long. But, listen I should probably be hitting the road."
"Have you seen Mom yet?" Jess asked, filling a to-go cup with coffee.
"Yes. Saw her, talked to her she knows all about it. I also let TJ know he can relax within the hour. All done,"
"Ok, good. I'll walk you out."
"Why thank you. Are you sure you have the time to spare?"
"Just get out of here." Jess shoved him towards the door and Jimmy pushed back playfully before they returned to the snow-covered sidewalk.
Mia narrowed her eyes and walked to Lorelai, one purpose on her mind. "What's the matter with you?" she asked, taking the empty seat beside the desk; Michel was away until after the holidays.
"What's the matter with me?" Lorelai repeated, flipping through the reservation desk. "Well, nothing, except that Michel's post-it system is freaking me out."
"I can see that something's wrong. I've been out of the loop for a while now, but I can still tell when one of my babies is having a bad day. So tell me, what's the matter?"
"Really, Mia. It's nothing. I'm just… Just got to get back into the swing of things after Christmas,"
"Christmas was one day. You had one day off, you could have had more, I wouldn't have minded. But you just took the one, so there couldn't be too much of a problem with your swing. Tell me what else is bothering you."
"I'm…"
"Yes?"
"…really in need of some more coffee. Do you want a cup? I'm gonna grab some from the kitchen." Lorelai decided, closing the book and walking away, to hide out in the kitchen for a bit, hoping Sookie wouldn't press for information.
"What the hell is the matter with you?!" Rory demanded, throwing the door open and storming into the apartment that night.
"Excuse me?" Lorelai looked up from the carton of ice cream she'd been staring into and switching off the TV she'd paid no attention to since first turning it on.
"He waited. All day, every time the door opened and that idiotic little bell jingled, he looked up, waiting for you. But you couldn't be bothered coming within ten feet of the place. What's wrong with you?"
"Oh, that's good. Act like you had nothing to do with it; you're just an innocent bystander." Lorelai returned, slamming the carton onto the coffee table and glaring daggers at her daughter. "What were you thinking, huh? Planting mistletoe around everywhere? Why would you do that?"
"I was trying to help! To move things along. You weren't supposed to freak out and run scared."
"No? In the puppet show you imagined, how did I react to my sixteen-year-old daughter playing matchmaker to a relationship she has no business meddling with? Did I fall into his arms? Apologize for everything and profess my love? Is that how it was supposed to go?"
"You were supposed to at least want to try!" Rory shot back. They were both standing now, glowering at one another. "I wanted you to remember, to talk-"
"We did talk. We talked after your birthday, otherwise known as the time I stupidly thought I could come here and it would be ok. We talked and it was uncomfortable and painful, but it was what we needed and Luke made it that we were done. We've been done for years. It's over ok? So whatever you think you see when you look at us, you're wrong kid."
"Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"Call me kid. I'm not a kid. I had to grow up, faster than I should have thanks to your life choices. So don't treat me like I'm five years old, I'm not. And I know what I'm seeing when the two of you are together."
"No. You-"
"Fine. Say I'm wrong; say there really is nothing there anymore. Why did you do it? You were alone, no one to insist that you kiss under the mistletoe, why did you do it?"
"I don't-"
"You do know mom. Stop lying, at least to yourself."
"I… It would have meant more if… if we refused, that would have said so much more than just doing it. If we didn't then everything we've tried to rebuild since I got back would all be for nothing."
"Exactly," Rory nodded her hands on her hips.
"That doesn't mean that what you did was ok. Do you hear me? We were doing fine without your help."
"No. You weren't."
"We were." Lorelai insisted, "For what I did, I don't deserve to hope for more that what we've had these last weeks. We were good, but now that's screwed up."
"Remember my little entrance back there?"
"You get that from my mother, I think." She mumbled. "The flare for dramatics,"
"I told you he was waiting," Rory explained. "All day, he was waiting. And that means that it's not all screwed up. It's not too late. So go! Go and talk and kiss and apologize if you feel the need. Just go and fix it!"
"No."
"No? After all that, my speeches, everything, you're saying no? Why?"
"It's not the time. I will." Lorelai added hastily, to stop Rory from interrupting again. "Try to talk. But not yet, I'm not ready."
"But you will be?"
"Eventually, I hope."
"That's something at least, I guess." Rory replied, moving over to sit on the couch and pick up her mom's ice cream. Lorelai shook her head and sat beside her, turning the TV back on and settling back.
When Rory returned to Luke's later that night, he was asleep on the couch, an old baseball game being played on the TV. She switched it off, and moved to cover him with a blanket, but realized that he already was. Shrugging her shoulders, thinking he'd just grabbed it before falling asleep, she headed for her room, but stopped in the doorway.
"Jess? What are you doing here?"
"You don't like it, do you?"
"Don't like what?"
"The book," He replied, turning around, holding 'the book' in his hands. "I thought 'Metamorphosis' would be a good idea. It's a great book, I was sure you'd love it."
"It is a great book. And your notes in the margins make it even better. But I was sort of hoping... I mean, I know I shouldn't have expected... But I just wanted-"
"You wanted my note book."
"Was that wrong of me?"
"No. I don't know, I guess not. I wanted to give it to you, but I thought that with everyone around it wouldn't be a good idea. They'd all want to know what it was and, even if I can share it with you, I'm not sure I could with all of them."
"Ok. I get that, I'm sorry. But I do like this book, I do."
"And I like the albums you gotme."
"They were Lane's idea, actually. I couldn't think of anything to get you, but she worked it out, went for simple."
"I'll thank her tomorrow."
"You do that," Rory stepped forward and put her arms around Jess' waist and he did the same. "So, how long do you think we have until your mom comes looking for you?" She asked after placing a quick kiss on his lips.
"Since she has no idea that I'm not in my room..."
"And I'm assuming Luke was asleep when you got here?"
Jess nodded. "He looked a little cold too, so I got him a blanket."
"Great. No one to check up on us, any ideas on how we could use this time," Rory asked, pulling him toward her bed and sitting down, "utilise its full potential?"
"Actually, I was thinking, maybe you'd like to do some reading."
"No. I'm not really in a very Kafka-y mood right now."
"How about a Mariano-y mood?"
"Well, I'm always in one of those moods. That's why-"
"I mean, would you like to read this? Instead of Kafka?" he produced a book from her bedside table and handed it over.
"You don't have to do this." Rory objected, "I understand that you want-"
"I want you to read it. I told you, if it weren't for all the other people in the room yesterday, this is what I would have given you."
"If you wanted to get me alone, all you had to do was ask mister."
"Well, there was a lot going on, I wasn't sure you'd have the time. But now you have it, so I'll let you get started and I'll see you tomorrow."
"Bu-"
"If you're going to make notes, try not to make too much of a mess, ok?" Jess added, standing up and heading for the door.
"Jess, hang on a second. I forgot something."
"What?" Rory jumped off the bed and followed him over to the door.
"Thank you. You're very, very sweet to give me this. And I promise not to try not to make too much of a mess."
"Good. And your welcome, I'll see you tomorrow." Rory nodded and he kissed her once more before quietly walking out the door and down the stairs.
I'm going to hell, Rory thought as she watched Luke watch the world outside the diner. Straight to hell; do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.
When she'd first come up with the idea to nudge Luke and her mom back together she hadn't counted on Lorelai to be the one to become a basket case. Should have though, she mused. She has always been a little flaky.
She had been expecting Luke to be the more hesitant of the two; after all, he was the one that got left last time. But she hadn't thought she would have to look at that wounded puppy dog for four days straight. If I'm going to hell, I'm taking her with me, Rory decided. I did not make that face on my own. She was supposed to come. She said she would come and fix this, so where is she?
"Rory?"
"Sorry." Rory replied, focusing on Luke as he waved a hand in front of her. "I'm sorry. So sorry,"
"It's not that big of a deal. We all space out now and then." He told her dismissively.
"No. I'm sorry. I know we haven't talked about it, because frankly, talking about you and mom kissing is not something I really want to do. But I shouldn't have pushed it, I shouldn't-"
"Rory, its fine. Don't worry about it, really."
"It's not fine. That face is not a fine face."
"What face?" Luke asked a little offended.
"The face you've been making since Boxing day. If I had just left things alone, you guys would have continued on your agonizingly slow path towards reconciliation. But I got in the way; she's hiding out at work and you look as if your best friend just dropped dead."
"I don't- Oh, look, come here," he grabbed her arm and pulled her up the stairs to the landing outside the apartment. "Was that really the best idea?" he asked, once they were in private. "No. But I'm fine everything's going to be alright. I'm sure. When your mom is able to face me again, I'll tell her the same thing. So you can take me off suicide watch, alright? I promise I'm ok."
"What will you say to her?" Rory asked, studying him.
"I just-"
"No. Not the 'everything's fine' bit. Don't give me that again. I mean, what are you going to say? About where you stand?"
"I think that's sort of between her and me, don't you?"
"Please. The two of you need all the help you can get. And I don't want you stuffing up one of the most important conversations of your adult life, so come on, tell me, what are you thinking of saying?"
"I... I don't... I haven't thought about it all that much."
"You're a terrible liar."
"I think I've heard that somewhere before."
"Well you are. I know you've done nothing but think about it. But that's fine; keep it to your self, maybe I'll just eavesdrop."
"Not if you want to continue living here you won't."
"How many times are you going to threaten me with that?"
"As many as it takes for you to take me seriously."
"You'll never throw me out," Rory told him confidently. "You've grown way too accustomed to me."
"Get back to work," Luke ordered. "And pay attention to what you're doing this time."
"You kissed him didn't you?"
"Wow," Lorelai stood stunned, holding onto the door frame. "Did that come out of left field or what?"
"Just tell me... I mean, I know you won't actually tell me, but, if you're planning on running again, and hurting him, I need to know. We need to be prepared."
"Sookie, you're rambling."
"This isn't funny Lorelai!" The chef insisted. "The last time there was no warning and you have no idea how hard it was to try and keep him stable. So I'm asking you, begging, actually. Just don't do it, leave him alone before he gets in too deep again."
"Alright do you want to come inside? I'd rather we had this conversation in private."
"Is there anything else to say?"
"Well, yeah. I think I should get a chance to defend myself after you ambushed me."
"Fine," Sookie nodded and came inside. Lorelai shut the door and they both sat on the couch. "So?"
"We kissed,"
"I knew it! Why would you-"
"There was mistletoe and I guess, we were trying to prove a point or something. I don't know. But that was it, I left right away after."
"How could you?"
"I had too. I just... I couldn't stay there and have an awkward conversation, or no conversation, or... I just had to." Lorelai argued. "And by the way, weren't you the one getting all hysterical every time our names were mentioned in the same sentence? When did I become Hitler?"
"That was excitement over a hypothetical something. Actually looking at him now, it's different."
"So he looks the same as he did after...?"
"Not exactly, but I can see the shadows of that Luke making their way to the surface and that's why I'm here, I need you to fix it. Please."
"When did everyone start thinking I was super miss fix-it girl?" Lorelai mumbled, running a hand through her hair.
"Lorelai..."Sookie gave her a warning look.
"Ok, alright! I get it, ok? I'll go tomorrow,"
"Thank you." Sookie nodded and stood up. "By the way," she added, turning back just as she reached the door. "If this works out, I'll go back to hysterical excitement like that." She clicked her fingers and Lorelai laughed lightly as she walked out the door.
"Right. If this works out, how does that happen, exactly?" she asked the silence of her apartment.
She took a deep breathe before opening the door and walking inside. A woman on a mission, that's what she was.
This had to be done now.
All the people looking at her didn't matter, she just needed to get over there to where he was and clear all of this up.
Here goes. "Luke, can we talk please?"
AN: Alright, as far as cliffhangers go, that's a crap one, because I'm certain we all know whos tapping him on the shoulder. But that's beside the point. I haven't written one in yoks and just felt the need to throw that in, so there. How did we like this? Hmm? I wana know!