"Home sweet home," Oghren muttered. "Never thought I'd say that about anywhere on the surface."

Vigil's Keep was visible in the distance. They were back. Finally. Elissa looked around and saw that Oghren and Anders had perked up once the keep came into view. Eric was watching them also. Erna, on the other hand, looked … nervous? Ragnar noticed it too and walked closer to her. Elissa caught her eye and tried to reassure her with a smile as she said, "We'll have to sort out your rooms once we get there. Think about what you might like and we'll see what we can do to house you." At this, Erna stopped dead in her tracks. Her eyes grew huge. "You mean … you mean I get to have my own room? And I get to choose it?" Ragnar didn't say anything, but he too had eyes as huge as saucers. Elissa stopped herself, signaling the rest of the group to stop as well, and turned the rest of the way to face her. She smiled again.

"Yes. I see no reason why not, unless you want to live in one of the houses in the courtyard." At that statement, Erna's eyes grew even larger. Her mouth opened and closed repeatedly. "An entire house?" she finally squeaked. Elissa laughed.

"They're more cottages than full houses, but yes. I thought you might like to be in the keep proper though, at least in the beginning. I thought you'd want to stay closer to your brother and we have the space." At this, Ragnar looked up at Elissa with a rare expression of gratitude on his face. He nudged Erna, who remembered herself and snapped her jaw shut before shaking her head and starting to walk again. Elissa turned forward and started walking, then remembered something. "You should go ahead," she said. "I need to speak with Nathaniel really quickly." She ignored Oghren's leer and Anders' low whistle and waved them off, smiling. Nathaniel stayed behind and waited for her. Once she was sure the others were out of earshot, she sat on a log that had fallen on the edge of the road and patted the spot next to her. He sat and looked at her, waiting for her to speak.

He's been quieter than usual recently. The realization came upon her suddenly. "Is everything all right?" she asked. He started.

"Is that what you wanted to ask just now?" He looked surprised.

"No, but I just realized you've said hardly anything for the past couple of days." Elissa turned to face him and put her hand on his arm. "I'm sorry I didn't notice before." She sighed. "You've been taking care of me for a while now and it's not right that I shouldn't notice that you might need someone to talk to."

Nathaniel smiled a little. "It's all right." He took a deep breath and let it out, relaxing his shoulders before chuckling wryly. "I've been thinking too much myself recently. It can wait until later."

Elissa nodded. "All right. After dinner, then?" Nathaniel nodded once in agreement, so she changed the subject. "What I actually wanted to talk about was the joining. We should put Ragnar through it soon, before he ..." she swallowed the lump that suddenly jumped into her throat, "before he gets settled."

Nathaniel thought for a moment. "Why don't we do the joining after lunch?" he said. "That will give him the morning to explore the grounds, but it won't give him more time than he needs to relax a little bit." He covered her hand with his. "I feel like he'll be all right, Elissa. Try not to worry too much."

Elissa closed her eyes and sighed, then opened them again and stood up. She held out a hand for Nathaniel to take and helped him stand. "I'll do my best. At least we'll know either way soon." She leaned forward for a kiss before they both turned toward the keep and walked the rest of the way home.

Eric was waiting for them at the gates. "Can I speak with you?" he asked Elissa. She looked at Nathaniel, who gave her a brief smile, then back at Eric. "Certainly. Should we go to the study?"

Eric shook his head. "That's not necessary. I wanted to ask both of you something, actually." Nathaniel had started to walk off, but came back. Eric waited for Nathaniel to return and took a deep breath, letting it out, before saying, "I'd like to become a Grey Warden, if that's possible."

Did … I … hear that correctly? Elissa blinked. "Really?" she said aloud. "What about the Chantry, and your oaths as a templar?" She lowered her voice. "What about lyrium? I don't know if I can keep you in potions without at least Greagoir's help. I saw someone in severe withdrawal once and it was horrible."

"Wait." Nathaniel put his hand on her arm. "Let's hear him out. I think he'd make a good Warden."

Elissa sighed. "All right, let's talk about this." She looked at Eric and he started to explain.

"I haven't had the most illustrious career as a templar." Eric was speaking as a matter-of-fact, but his eyes showed some amusement. "I have a tendency to think for myself, you see," and here his tone turned sardonic, "and I'm not nearly fanatical enough to obey my orders without question." He frowned. "When I found out about the Grand Cleric's plot, it made me think about the oaths I took and how I really felt about the Chantry. I believe in Andraste and the Maker, but ..." He stopped and looked at them both directly. "I don't think I can be part of an organization that is willing to poison its people to keep them in line and spy on others while claiming to be above reproach." He sighed. "As for the lyrium, I doubt I'll ever be completely free of it. But I've been cutting back as much as I can. Anders has helped by diluting lyrium potions so that I take as little as possible. I never took that much in the first place, so it's not as bad as others who have been in the order as long as I have."

"And that's worked?" Elissa studied Eric's face. He seemed to be fully engaged and not delirious at all, so it looked like he was all right. "You're with us here, now? You're not seeing things or feeling confused?"

Eric laughed. "Well, I wouldn't know if I was seeing things, would I?" Elissa had to concede that point. "But I am here with you and I don't believe I've been hallucinating. I've had some really nasty headaches, but Anders has been helping me with herbal remedies and healing where he can."

Nathaniel's brows raised. He was clearly impressed. Elissa was too - lyrium addiction, by all counts, was not a small problem. Elissa was still concerned, however. "Eric," she said slowly, "Being a Grey Warden is hard on you. There's the danger, of course, but as a templar who chased apostates I'm sure you aren't as worried about that." Eric nodded in agreement. "I'm worried about the … morality … of being a Warden more for you. We have to make a lot of really tough decisions. So far, most of the decisions I've had to make were between one questionable option and another equally questionable option. It seems like the Chantry teaches you things in black and white, and we don't have the luxury of dealing with those sorts of choices." She thought of Alistair, and how hard it was for him to get past his personal ideals of what being a Warden was and how things should be, and instead focus on what was not-the-worst possibility. "I say this now because being a Warden changes you irrevocably, and you need to know this before you commit to it. As a templar, that could be really hard for you."

Eric looked thoughtful for a while before speaking again. "I understand," he said, and then he smiled. "As it happens, that was exactly the reason I got in trouble with my superiors frequently." His smile widened to a full-blown grin. "The Reverend Mother in Lothering hated me, in fact." He shook his head, still smiling, then continued. "Look, I don't have any illusions about the Grey Wardens being a team of people who do no wrong and who never make any difficult decisions. The order would never have the reputation it does if it never did anything. I see the Wardens as a group of people who may not fit in elsewhere, but who still have a lot to offer the world. I think I can do some good here, instead of just muddling along, and I'd like to be part of what you do."

Elissa shook her head and smiled. When she looked at Nathaniel, he raised an eyebrow at her as if to say what did I tell you? "All right, then. We'll meet after lunch to put you and Ragnar through the joining. And, Eric," here she hesitated, "may the Maker watch over you." Eric bowed in thanks and set off toward the keep. Elissa sighed and closed her eyes briefly. We'll know in just a few hours. I hope they make it.

Progress toward the keep itself was slow. Because of their extended absence, everyone wanted to speak with Elissa to update her on their progress with rebuilding the keep, recruiting, trade, and any number of lesser matters. Even though the main courtyard was not terribly large, it took Elissa an hour to make her way through the crowd. She thought she was doing pretty well, actually; Kylon had obviously been doing well in her absence. Most of the updates she received involved the phrase, "Seneschal Kylon said ..." Elissa was pleased, especially since she agreed with nearly all of Kylon's decisions.

Finally, after a long reception line of people who wanted to talk to Elissa, she reached the gate to the inner courtyard. Her seneschal was standing there, waiting for her.

"Kylon, it's good to see you. How have you been?" Elissa smiled at him. For some reason, out of everyone she worked with, the seneschal was the only person who insisted on being addressed only by his last name. ("Even my parents used to call me Kylon," he'd said. "After a while, I think they forgot my given name. I forget what it is myself half the time and I'd never answer to it anyway.") Elissa assumed it was because he had some really awkward first name like Aloysius or, Maker forbid, Frederic, and didn't want to be teased.

"I am doing well. It's been busy," Kylon replied. "I see you have new recruits with you?" Elissa nodded.

"Yes, we'll be needing the main hall after lunch. We have some Warden business to attend to at that time."

"That should be no problem. I assume you'll want to catch up on arling business afterward?"

Elissa nodded again. "That sounds good. I think I'll go clean up from the road now, unless there's anything that requires immediate attention?"

"There is." The seneschal looked back toward the keep, then back at Elissa. "Lady Alfstanna is here. She's waiting in the main hall to speak with you."