Chapter 4, Father's Love
The walk down to dinner was rather uneventful; my fingers stroked the wall as I walked down the halls admiring in my own time the level of beauty this place contained. When I reached the end of the hallway and pressed the button for the elevator I was surprised to notice Mori leaving his room. Locking the door with his key he looked over at me and nodded.
"Evening, Mori-Sempai," I sang, trying to get my mind off the pain I felt in my feet from the strappy shoes. He looked me up and down and I felt my cheeks grow warm from the attention.
"Nice dress," he grunted and returned his gaze to the waiting elevator.
"Thank you. Hey, where is Honey-Sempai?" I questioned looking around.
"Mitskuni?" he called, and as soon as his deep sound rebounded off the walls, Honey appeared, racing down the hall to get into the closing elevator.
"Here I am, Haru-chan!" he giggled. I looked both the boys up and down and smiled at how ravishing they both looked in their dress clothes. I felt a growing sense of pride and I told them so pretty much immediately.
"Oh you are so cute!" Honey cried hugging my waist. His spiky blonde hair was soft and I cuddled him closer into my waist. The elevator dinged and opened to another deserted hallway, we still had a while to walk before we reached the designated dinner hall. My thoughts faded back to the last time we were here at the Ootari private beach and the trouble I caused with my ignorant behavior. The danger I could have been in and the amount I meant to everyone else was something I was only recently coming to terms with.
I had always dealt with things by myself but the boys were right, it would help if I learnt some way to defend myself.
"Honey-Sempai…Mori-Sempai?" I called, my voice echoing off the painted walls. I was sure this was what I needed. They had walked on in front of me but turned around to face me, still a few paces in front. "Do you think, maybe, tomorrow morning and for a few mornings to come, you guys could wake me up early and teach me some martial arts?"
The boys turned and faced each other and I could see their calculating expressions. I started to get a bit worried, wondering if what I had asked was inconvenient for them in any way. I was reassured pretty soon after they jumped up and down, grinning as they erupted in waves of joy and excitement, well Honey-Sempai mainly. "Of course, Haru-chan!" Honey yelled and high-fived Mori who was beginning to look at me in concern. I grimaced and rubbed my feet; it was going to be a long night if I didn't sit down soon.
Honey continued chatting away about what they were going to do tomorrow, apparently starting out with basics meant testing my fitness. I was beginning to regret my decision to ask the most advanced martial arts students in probably all of Japan to be my tutors. I lifted my foot again and gave it a gentle massage before setting it down and running to catch up with the other two.
Mori frowned and without warning picked me up in his arms with total ease and I was so shocked, I gasped for air and looked up at his face questioningly.
"You were hurt," he said with a husky voice and continued to carry me with no effort as Honey tittered on about tomorrow morning, not seeming to notice that I was no longer walking.
I felt safe in his arms and the gentle thrum of his heart seemed almost soothing, I was on the verge of being relaxed if it weren't for the throbbing in my feet. I mentally cursed Tamaki for his lack of sense regarding my clothing and shoes. My thoughts were distracted by Honey's voice saying my name.
"Uh, sorry what did you say?"
"I just said you look very beautiful tonight, Haru-chan. Tama-kun will be breathless when you walk in the room. As will everyone else I expect. But no one as much as he," he said with a smile, his baby voice accenting the compliment he paid me. I smiled back at him and was about to say something snide about he better considering the pain I am going through. He seemed to pick up on this and stopped me before I could start.
"He cares a lot about you Haru- chan, you know he would do anything for you. I think you mean more to him than he really understands at the moment."
I didn't really know how to respond to this so I just nodded and reflected on what he had just said. Was he saying that Tamaki liked me more than just the friend/family relationship we had going on? I suppose it would make sense but I had never really considered it. Now that I thought about it, being surrounded by very attractive young men all the time it kind of takes away any appeal you may think you have. Especially considering I was trying to impress ladies all the time. Thinking about my own relationships with boys was something I never was interested in. But with this new input from Kyoya and Honey's thoughts on Tamaki, maybe it was something I should start considering but I really wasn't keen to hear about it from my dad when I came home. As if reading my thoughts, Honey piped up again.
"But of course, you seem to be spending more time with Oosa-chan of late. Hikaru and Kaoru told us what happened when you three were playing twister. He has been acting strangely lately don't you think Takashi?"
"Mm," Mori replied.
Before I could think up a reply, or a lie I could tell in order to halt the conversation, I was put down on my feet and Mori nodded his head.
"Thankyou, Sempai" I nodded back and pushed open the mahogany door.
We entered a hall dripping with chandeliers, timeless statues and dark timber floorboards. Tamaki and the others were seated at a long dining table adorned with aromatic piles of every dish I could think of. With, might I add, a specific focus on fancy tuna. They all looked up over at us as we walked in and I watched each of their mouths open and gasp.
"Haruhi…" Hikaru started, and I sighed.
"Yeah I get it, I look a tad different. It's all good guys, seriously. You are looking like you have never seen me in a dress before."
"Not one that…well, stunning," Kaoru answered, still staring at me. I gazed down and shrugged. I sat down next to Tamaki and across from Kyoya. I nervously looked at Kyoya but he was looking down and away from me. I felt slightly disappointed but turned my attention over to Tamaki, who to my surprise was remarkably quiet. His blue eyes looked me once over, and then again in disbelief. He reached out his hand as if to say something but then let it fall back to his side, defeated.
"Tamaki, what is it?" I asked, a little self-conscious of my appearance now. "Do you not like my dress?"
"No! No. I…Uhhmm, don't worry about it." He looked down and I continued to look at him for a bit before shrugging my shoulders and looking back at Kyoya. He was staring quite intensely at Tamaki and the table was once again uncomfortably quiet.
"So…this is sufficiently awkward," said Kaoru in a bored tone.
"Well, before coming in here I asked Honey and Mori-Sempai to start giving me basic training in martial arts. I need to learn a way to defend myself against unwanted attention. You guys were right," I said loudly after clearing my throat. The twins looked excited and Kyoya's head snapped in my general direction. His eyes looked hurt and angry but then relaxed and returned to their stoic state.
"Yeah Haruhi! You learning martial arts is brilliant!" exclaimed Hikaru, closely followed by Kaoru saying; "You're gonna kick butt!" I smiled shyly and looked across at Honey Sempai and he grinned and nodded in encouragement.
"That is a wonderful idea! Tomorrow we will come watch and help out in any way we can!" Tamaki announced. "And with that, let's eat!"
I devoured almost an entire serving plate of tuna and boy was it good. I felt the others' eyes on me in disbelief but as I was in pure heaven I didn't mind.
"Well," Kyoya started, patting his lips with a napkin, "I have reviewed the budget, and unfortunately Tamaki we are not able to stay as long as you may have wished. Within the week we will have to return to school. The ladies, or clients, will be coming down not tomorrow but the day after to help alleviate some of the financial pressure. Of course all of you are paying your own way, except for Haruhi. Just prepare yourselves for the next coming days. I expect none of us will have much time off work."
The twins groaned and rolled their eyes. We had all finished dinner and Tamaki stood up almost immediately and turned to me.
"Haruhi, I have an announcement and I believe the whole table should bare witness to my epiphany. Haruhi, I have realized that the care I felt for you…whilst admittedly still feels fatherly has developed into something more. I understand that this is something that I do not wish to act on in the near future but Haruhi, if you ever consider me as more than a friend, know that the feeling is mutual. As to the rest of you, I understand how protective you all feel over our little girl and I will work my hardest to earn your approval. Haruhi, is there anything you would like to say in response, my dove?" He exclaimed dramatically and I just stared up at him, my eyes wide and lips opening and closing like a goldfish.
Kyoya stood up abruptly, slamming his glass down so hard I was sure it would break and left the room, his eyes like murder.
"Sempai…I…" I thought about what I wanted to say but I couldn't think of anything, I knew I didn't feel the same way for him but I wasn't going to crush him so easily. I observed everyone else's reactions, everyone was looking at me expectantly and I choked. In between coughs I managed to get out a small excuse. I ran from the room and shut the door, but not fast enough to hear the reminder of what just happened.
"Give her time boss, she needs to think."
"Never mind that, what was wrong with Ossa-Chan?"
"I don't know, maybe I should talk to—"
I lay against the door, my head heavy and unsure of where to go or what to do. I took off my shoes and started running down the hall. I felt the tears begin to well up in my eyes, but I couldn't figure out why. I impatiently pressed the elevator button over and over but grew tired of waiting and decided to take the stairs, even if my room was fourteen floors above where we were. My pulse was racing and my breathing shallow, I thought about going to my room but the person I really wanted to see was Kyoya. I wanted to talk to him, have him make some sense out of this for me. He was always the logical one and would reassure me that it was just an off-sided comment Tamaki was making.
I thought back to the night of the fair when Tamaki saved my life and I saved his spirit by bringing him back to the Host Club. I felt safe with him, but he was nothing more than a friend. A fatherly figure, sure a little eccentric and flamboyant, but at the end of the day just a friend.
I knew I wouldn't see Kyoya until at least when the clients arrived, he would still be refrained but he would at least make the effort for them. I didn't want things to be so formal between us and I think that was why my heart was causing my eyes to sob. I felt like I had lost him. The look he gave me as he left the dinner hall, damn near broke my heart. It was full of betrayal and hurt. Anger yes, but I don't think that was as much for me as it was Tamaki. My legs grew weak and I gasped for air. I was only ten floors up, but in conjunction with my sobbing I couldn't see properly anymore. I grabbed the gold, metal railing of the fire stairs and clung to it trying to get my vision back.
The all too familiar spinning began in my head and I cried out for help. My legs buckled and I heard a thumping coming from the levels above. Or maybe that was just a delusion and reflected the thumping I felt in my head. I fell backwards and reached out in front of me, I was going to fall down the stairs and I expected it was going to hurt. A lot.
But suddenly I stopped feeling like I was falling and I was pulled in to a warm embrace. I didn't black out, but I wasn't coherent until I was placed on a soft bed, and watched my mysterious savior walk to the side of the room pouring a glass of water. He sat down next to me on the bed and then with a loud bang punched the wall behind the bed.
I sat up and felt my head spin. My drink tipped over and all down my chest grew wet. I glanced around frantically and observed the hole in the delicate wall. My eyes swung around and found the body next to me in a grief stricken pose; head down, defeated, and eyes on the brink of being melancholy.
"Kyoya?" I whispered, reaching out for him but he flinched away.
"I was so mad at you before, I just couldn't deal with it. All I could think was how dare she kiss me and then have feelings for Tamaki, my best friend. You were supposed to be mine, be with me all the time. You were supposed to fall in love with me. I really thought that maybe I had a chance with you, I had thought about it so deeply. I couldn't understand why I was attracted to you for a long time but I finally worked it out tonight. You are the only person that understands me Haruhi, and you care for others so selflessly every day.
"You understood me so completely, so that was why I couldn't understand how you could not see how I truly felt. If you really knew me, why would you hurt me so? Why would you not make an effort to come talk to me, despite what I had said about it meaning nothing?
"It meant so much more to me than nothing. It meant everything. You kissed me back. I was heart broken twice, once seeing you with the twins and then again tonight. It is going to be a while before I can talk to Tamaki. And it was going to be awhile before I could talk to you but I was walking up the stairs slowly trying to calm myself so I didn't do something stupid when I heard you yell. I thought…I actually thought for a spilt second about ignoring you. But before it properly registered I was already running down the stairs, cradling you in my arms and carrying you up to my room. You were murmuring something in your daze about having to find me, and you looked so fragile when I lay you on the bed.
"That's when I realized I had done this to you, I was the reason you looked so weak right now. I am going to have to work to get that hole fixed but I have been so angry with the way I have been acting around you of late that well, it was only a matter of time before I broke. I like you Haruhi, I like you a lot, and unlike Tamaki, I don't have the strength to hear you say no. I need you to want me back, and promise you won't be with Tamaki, or Hikaru, or anyone else for that matter. I want you to be mine, Haruhi. I know this is a lot to put on you in one night but, I feel like I have calmed down quite a bit now," he finished with a whisper and looked down at me. I took in every word he had said and felt my heart speed up. I didn't like being a possession or being forced into something, but somehow with him I didn't mind. His protective nature was his way of showing me he cared. It may not come across in the most straightforward manner, but tonight this was the most he had ever revealed. I thought about replying to every notion he had brought forward but looking at his concerned eyes and the pinch between his eyebrows, I knew exactly what to do to make him feel okay.
I leant up towards him, allowing his arms to support my weak body and brought my lips to his once more. The tears spilled over from my eyes and he wiped them away with his hands as he held my face to his. It was clear now, how I felt about him and how he felt about me. But it seemed with one thing resolved; I now had a thousand other problems waiting for me.