I know it's tiring to wait for updates. I have absolutely no excuse. But, I do so appreciate your reviews and emails. Please don't stop. They have been so helpful since this is my first attempt at fan fiction

As usual almost all character belong to JE.

Thanks Kashy! Much appreciation for your help and all the time it takes. You are a great Beta to have in my corner.

Chapter 9 Conversation Ranger and Steph

Finding Steph wasn't all that difficult. Some of my guys knew where she was but hesitated to tell me. I was a little amazed to discover that she had moved in with my other terminated employees. It made things easier to get together with her but she was very definite about having had enough of my nonsense. I guess groveling is part of this process and I do mean groveling. This means to Tank, Lester and Bobby as well. I did tell her that I knew it was way past time to make everything clear to her and to the others who are so important to me.

But she finally agreed to meet me in a place of her choosing, not mine.

We met in a restaurant in a hotel in Atlantic City. If I thought she could not or would not show a lot of loud anger in a public place, I was sadly mistaken. It seemed likely that the diners might get an earful. However much yelling she was going to do, I wanted to hear it. It's a start on communication I guess.

"Okay Ranger." railed Stephanie. "You found me. You want to talk? Talk, but don't try to feed me any more bullshit such as that crap I got from your wife. You're going to have to come up with something pretty good because I have already heard several times, everything you have said and then I had to listen to what your wife added when you allowed her to fire me. That was beyond cruel you SOB. Let see if I remember all your statements. I've heard them so often I think I've got it pretty straight now" she counted off her fingers as she spoke, "Number one, I love you but in my own way. Two My love comes with a condom but not a ring. Three I don't do relationships. Four, All I can offer you is mind blowing sex" I couldn't read the emotion on her face at the word "sex", but her eyes got a momentary "not there" look. Five. It's dangerous to have a relationship with me. Six My life is not my own. Have I left out anything? Oh yeah, seven. I couldn't live with myself if something happened to you." She took a deep breath before continuing.

"If all of what you have said to me is true then what possible excuse do you have for that bitch up there who claims to be your wife? Just explain why she can be in your life with a ring and a relationship when apparently no one else can? And what possible explanation is there for the termination of so many of the men who have been so loyal to you?" She glared at me and I chose to be quiet and let her vent.

"As a matter of fact, I don't want to talk to you. Go spread your charm, your looks, your money, your "accomplishments", your sexual prowess and whatever else you might take pride in somewhere else. And take the wicked witch with you!"

"Stephanie, please just listen to me" I groaned. "I have to find a way to make all of this clear to you because I can no longer tolerate my life without you. I want you with me."

With tears streaming down her face but still in rhino mode Steph blurted out, "I thought I told you no more bullshit - you have a wife or whatever she is there at Rangeman. You just don't get it do you? I have loved you without condition or question for a very long time. Perhaps I should have made my feelings known a lot earlier, but with all your protestations it was a little difficult to look into your blank face and say I love you. I have put up with your excuses, your ignoring me, your absences explained and unexplained, but no more. I just don't have the heart, the patience or the stamina to tolerate any more from you.. Did you not read my letter? I thought it was pretty clear. So go away. Marry two or three more wives. I don't care. Just get away from me."

I groaned, "I can't do that Babe, you know I can't I know I haven't treated you as well as I should and I haven't been a truthful as I should. Steph please just give me five minutes. You have to at least listen to the explanation."

Grasping her arms, I tried to explain, "Lucia is not now and has never been my wife. I have no personal relationship of any kind with her. I never have. I used to trust her. She has been, in the past. a trusted colleague, but something has happened to her. I don't know what it is and I don't think that General Barnes even notices that she is different. You know how long I have trusted the General and now I am concerned that there may be something between the General and Lucia that will explain this situation. I have to get to the bottom of this and get Rangeman back in order with all of my guys. I have to get straight once more with you. Give me a chance Babe. From now on I will tell you everything that is going on. There will be no more secrets and just for the record, I do love you without any caveats."

"Give me some time Ranger," Steph said, tears still streaming down hr face. "Maybe, just maybe we can find our way around this. Right now I guess I still love you, but. In. my. own. way. Don't push it!"

"Babe, I can't even describe to you how rotten I feel about this. I can't even give you a coherent explanation for all of my recent decisions. I am really down about this." Shaking my head and looking down, "It has seemed that all of the absolutes I have believed in have proven to be wrong. I have always been so right, maybe, self righteous maybe, in my own head when I have made tough decisions. I'm really stretching here to make all of this right once more. I know I cannot do this without you. So please Babe, just once more try to trust me;" I try to pull Steph into my arms but she won't budge. I try lifting her face and eyes to me by tucking my hand under her chin to tell her, "I truly need you with me now, your strength, your spirit, your spidey sense, all that you are, Stephanie, right now.

My eyes feel a little watery, but I can't lose it now.

"Tank is contacting all of our guys to set up the confrontation I feel is critical. I hope we can get everyone together and that includes you. You are important to this meeting, especially to me, and to all the guys who care so much about you. Will you please promise to come to the meeting when we get it set? Please don't run from me Babe, I need you".

"There goes that "please" again. You know I have a terrible time saying no when you use that word." sighed Stephanie. "I'll consider it and I will discuss it with Lester and Tank, but I am warning you, this meeting better be what you say it is. And then, if it is, perhaps we can begin to talk about us. I don't want to ever see that blank face again. Us is not a dirty word, at least it didn't used to be to me."

"Thank you Babe. I know this is not going to be easy. Tank or Lester will let you know when the meeting is set. We are waiting for Lucia to get back to Trenton. We've already moved her off of the 7th floor and I want her out of the building and out of our lives whatever it might take, legal, political or whatever."

"I love you Babe, please try to remember that above all else."