"I want to see it again!" Liz gushed and Jess handed over a piece of paper, slightly embarrassed. "Oh! I'm so proud of you! Are you sure you don't want to try your dad again? He'd love to hear about this."

"I already left him a message," Jess replied. "Besides, they're just test scores."

"They are great scores! Amazing, top notch! They're-"

"Hello? Anybody home?" Rory called out, coming in the front door.

"Kitchen!" Jess called back grabbing the letter of his mom and shoving it into a near-by drawer.

"What are you-"

"Is that Doula? I think she's woken up from her nap, maybe you should go check." Jess suggested. Liz frowned, staring at him as Rory came in.

"Fine... Hi Rory, see if you can work out what's up his butt would you?"

"Okay... Did I come at a bad time?" Rory checked, looking at her boyfriend's mother as she left the room.

"No, no, it's a great time. What's up?"

"Well, I got my results!"

"Your..?"

"My SAT results. They arrived yesterday or the day before, I don't know, but I guess I haven't gotten around to changing my postal address so they were sitting at the diner and Luke only just told me and I was wondering if you'd gotten yours yet." She explained rapidly.

"Oh, I um,"

"Coz I was thinking we could open them together, even though it only just occurred to me this second that yours are probably way better than mine and I should do this alone, but whatever, I'm here now. So have you?"

"Have I what?"

"Got your results?"

"Mail hasn't gotten here yet." Jess shook his head.

"Well, are you sure it didn't come yesterday?"

"Probably won't get here for a couple of days yet. Gilmore and Mariano aren't exactly close together, alphabetically."

"I thought Skip always stopped here early in his run because he had a crush on your mom."

"I guess her getting married and having a baby put a bit of a damper on that one for him."

"Guess so. Well anyway, Mom and Luke have a date tonight, and as much as I enjoy gelatinous mac and cheese with a whipped cream chaser I was wondering if you guys had room for one more here? I could convince Liz to order Chinese and I'll even chip in money and everything." Rory added, moving towards the take-out menu drawer.

"What are you doing?" Jess asked jumping in the way.

"Isn't this where you keep the-"

"No. We moved them. Besides, dinner's hours away, what's the rush?"

"I'm sure I saw your mom put Al's new menu in here a couple of days ago."

"I went on a cleaning frenzy last night, moved a lot of stuff around. Why don't we find it later? We could go listen to this new CD Lane gave me last week," he suggested, inching towards his room. Rory moved as if to follow him but then bolted back to the top secret drawer, pulling it open. "What are you-"

"These are amazing..." Rory breathed, holding Jess's scores.

"It's not-"

"You got a 750 verbal and a 770 math! This is..."

"They're not that great, really."

"Are you kidding? Why did you pretend you didn't have them yet?"

"I just thought-"

"You'd wait and see what I got before announcing your brilliance so as not to make me feel any more stupid than necessary?"

"No! Of course not."

"Because-"

"You are not stupid. And when you open your results they will reflect that. This is why I didn't want to show you yet. I knew you'd freak out."

"Hey, it's not like I really care all that much anyway. I'm only doing this for my grandparents."

"That's not true and you know it. You want it just as much-"

"You don't know that, you can't just assume that because I may have wanted something for five minutes I'd die if the chance slipped through my fingers."

"Rory, why are we arguing about this?"

"I don't know!"

"Could it possibly be because you're nervous about what's in that envelope?"

"No. I... I just don't get why you were hiding it from me. I did the best that I could." She admitted a moment later with a shrug.

"Yeah, and I know you were worried but you looked like you were doing great, and I'm sure there's good news in there."

"Open it."

"What? No!"

"Yes. You have to open it. I can't do it. You've done it once today, this shouldn't be a big deal, just tell yourself it's an overdue book notice or something."

"Why can't you tell yourself that?"

"Because I know better,"

"Well I do too."

"Yeah, ok, so we both know it's not some letter from a random pen pal or anything, but think of it this way – your entire future doesn't rest on what's in here, so there shouldn't be any pressure on you."

"Shouldn't be, but there is. I can't just-"

"Oh, give it to me!" Liz demanded coming through the door and handing Doula to Rory. "Geez the two of you... yak, yak, yak! How long does a person have to hide behind a door before everyone gets to be happy? Seriously!" She took the envelope from Jess and looked between the two of them. "You sure you don't want to do this?"

"I'm sure." Rory replied, shifting Doula, not really even aware that she was holding the baby.

"Okay..." Liz slipped a nail under the fold of the envelope and slit it open, keeping her eyes on the kids before pulling out the paper with Rory's results on it. She read over the page quickly, nodding as she took in the information and then handed it to Rory, taking her daughter back at the same time. "Congratulations."

"What? What did you get?" Jess asked.

"740 verbal and... 730 in math?"

"You did?"

"I... I think. Is that what you read?" Rory asked, looking at Liz a little dazed.

"Yep, that's what I read. You want a third opinion?" Jess took the letter and looked it over himself.

"Wow. You did! You did great."

"Not as good as you,"

"But still, this is really, really good."

"There should be celebrations tonight, right? You both did amazing."

"Well, Mom and Luke already have plans. They're going on a date, so-"

"Trust me they'll cancel for this. Or possibly invite us all to join, provided they weren't headed to some candlelit romance-novel extravaganza. You should tell them now, and check where they're going so I can work out if I should book somewhere else."

"Couldn't we just get a table at the inn or something?" Rory checked.

"When you pass your midterms, we go to the inn. When you both get results like these on your SAT's – the big kahuna, kicking the PSAT's ass – we do it up right, which means fancy dinner. So come on, chop, chop!"

"Ok, I'll go see what I can find out then." Rory replied, walking in the direction of the laundry room.

"Jess, go with her and make sure she doesn't walk into oncoming traffic, ok?"

"On it. Come on, Ror, how 'bout we try this door?" he suggested, leading her towards the back door.

"Sure..."

"I can't believe you made us bring these with us," Jess muttered, looking between the two proud, beaming mothers and the letters in the middle of the table that some one had gotten framed during the day, as a waitress walked away, having just taken their orders.

"That's what you're choosing to take issue with?" Rory checked. "Not the brightly coloured balloons secured to both our chairs with 'genii' scrawled all over them?"

"Well no, I'm kind of used to the balloons. They've been a constant presence in my life for as long as I can remember and I mostly tune them out now."

"Lucky you."

"They're staying." Liz decided. "This is a celebration, and you can't have a celebration without balloons, now can you?" Rory opened her mouth to reply, but realised she didn't actually have an answer, so just picked up her water glass instead. "That's right." Liz smiled triumphantly.

"Ok, ok, stop acting like annoying little kids, would you?" Luke asked. "Just sit quietly and wait for your food."

"Yes Dad!" Liz, Jess and Rory all returned, grinning at him.

"I love the balloons," TJ decided. "They look really cool, I just wish I had some."

"We'll attach some to your recliner tomorrow, ok Honey?"

"Sounds good to me,"

"I want to say something," Lorelai announced.

"Oh God..."

"Shush, daughter. I am your mother, and on an occasion such as this, it is in my rights to make an embarrassing speech, so you just have to sit there and take it."

"Well can you please get it over with quickly because I have to go to the bathroom in a sec and hang myself,"

"Certainly. I just want to say how incredibly proud I am of all the progress you've made in the time that you've been living in Stars Hollow. You've come so far and," Rory made a face and shook her head. "No, you have, you're almost a different person. If it weren't for the fact that you still talk to me like I'm your worst enemy sometimes, I'd start getting suspicious that there had been some body snatching going on. We're all very proud," she continued, "and your grandparents will be too- they might even offer to buy you a car. Actually they'll probably insist on it, but I want you to promise to hold out until they offer something really great. And I don't just mean the same model as Johnny Depp or Leonardo DiCaprio's car or anything, but the actual car that they dive, or drove. Or the Ferrari from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Ooh yeah, yeah, demand the Ford Mustang from Bullit!"

"Are you serious?"

"Come on, they can afford it. Plus, Steve McQueen!"

"Ok, is that it? Is your big important speech over now?"

"Um, you did great too Jess, the pride... You know. We're all very proud."

"Thanks?"

"Remind me to hide the booze from her at my twenty first please."

"That sounds like an excellent idea." Luke agreed as one of the waitresses made her way over.

"We've got your garlic bread here." She announced placing a couple of small baskets in the middle of the table. "Your meals will be out in a few minutes." She added before walking away again just as another woman was wandering by with a drink in hand.

"Happy birthday you two," she called out to the teens in the decorated chairs. The six of them looked at one another for a moment and burst out laughing.

As Liz and TJ left to go check on the baby and relieve the sitter Jess stood out the front of Lorelai's building with Rory, enjoying a little silence for the first time all night.

"My God our parents are exhausting, aren't they?" he asked and she laughed, nodding.

"And happy. They're all so happy, it's a little unsettling."

"I know how we can fix that."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, we just tell 'em we're not really going to college and this whole thing was all just a bit of fun."

"Mhmm, because that would sound so believable coming from the boy wonder who has had Harvard paraphernalia plastered all over his wall since he discovered The Harvard Shop."

"Ok, so maybe not. You got any ideas to make them stop smiling like that for the next six months?"

"Nope."

"I guess we just have to deal with it then."

"Oh, there is always the possibility that we don't fill out the applications properly or send them in late or..."

"We're not doing that are we?"

"Hell no."

"Ok, good. You almost had me convinced there for a second."

"Yeah, well, it would sound more credible coming from me."

"I didn't buy it when you were trying to tell me you didn't care about your results, why would they?"

"They don't know me as well as you do?"

"That's true."

"So, anyway, Mom got a very interesting phone call before we left tonight that I'm sure she's filling Luke in on right now."

"The FBI finally tracked her down and she's looking for a place to crash for a couple days until the heat dies down?"

"Grandma heard about my fabulous results and she's decided that I can bring a guest to this wonderful celebratory dinner."

"Has she just?"

"But I know that's the last place you ever want to go again, so you don't have to worry. I'll make up an excuse as to why you won't be there."

"Thank you."

"Even though this night is supposed to be about me and my amazing accomplishment, so I should get to have all the people who I care about me under one roof, right?"

"You're getting very good at your manipulation." Jess praised and Rory grinned.

"Thank you!"

"I still don't want to go."

"I know, that's ok, I don't really want to either, but I have an obligation. I wonder how Mom's going with Luke."

"Ah, geez, are you serious?"

"Well, she didn't actually say I could bring someone, but if Rory gets to, I should as well right?"

"She didn't invite me?"

"No."

"But you want me to show up unannounced anyway?"

"No, of course not. I'll call her back in the morning, announce it to her then."

"Lorelai, I really don't..."

"It'll be fun! You and me can hide un the corner while my parents lavish attention on the next generation and make us feel like crap for not being over-achievers."

"No, really, I think it would be better if I didn't-"

"Oh fine!"

"I'm sorry, but-"

"No, no. It's ok. No one should have to go through those dinners unless they're bound by a contract. Which, in a way, I am. But you're free, so don't worry about it. Just, think of me while you eat something nice and normal for dinner and I'm being forced to swallow something that's never been served outside the Roman empire, ok?"

"I can do that."

"Good, so I have something for you also."

"Rory could come up at any moment, shouldn't-"

"Dirty!" Lorelai replied, grinning as she moved over to the little table by the door that the phone sat on. "No, this is nothing that she can't see, don't worry." She explained, removing something from the drawer. "Here."

"What is this?" Luke asked, taking the piece of paper she held out.

"Another cheque. For the last of the money I owe you. At least I think so, unless you've gone and tacked on some interest you forgot to mention."

"No I didn't do that."

"Good. So this is it then. Thank you."

"Oh, well good." He folded it up and slipped it into his wallet. "Thanks."

"Yeah, I thought about handing this over right after we..."

"I really wish you had never done that."

"It was only the one time!"

"Yeah, but still,"

"I know. That's why I decided this would be better. No feeling of prostitution."

"Thank you for your restraint."

"You're welcome."

"Well I should probably go now, see how Caesar's gone tonight running things by himself."

"He's been left alone before, hasn't he?"

"Yeah, heaps of times. I just-"

"You just want to get out of here before I find a way to convince you to come to dinner right? Ok, fine, go."

"Lorelai, really, I just-"

"It's fine Luke. I completely understand the need to protect oneself from that house. You don't need to explain."

"If you're sure,"

"I am. Now go make sure Caesar hasn't been eating out of the pie plate again." Lorelai instructed, pushing him towards the door.

"I'll see what I can do about sending Rory up as well. How the two of them have never gotten pneumonia astounds me."

"They have the same resilience as us." Lorelai explained. "Once upon a time, we were the ones that spent an hour standing out in the snow making kissy faces, remember?"

"I never-"

"Ok, you never made a kissy face. Sure. I guess it was all me then. You go ahead and try to separate them, I'll just wait up here."

"Good night."

"Night," Lorelai replied before making kissing sounds and batting her eyelashes at Luke who just shook his head and slipped out the door.

"I can't tell you how thrilled I am about this." Emily announced a couple of nights later, "This is all so wonderful! Did you have any idea you had done so well?"

"None at all. I was just hoping I'd passed, I didn't really think too much about the exact number."

"That's probably best. You could have put a lot of pressure on yourself aiming for a specific score." Richard agreed.

"You did know that we would have made room for a guest, if you'd wanted to bring a friend, don't you? This is after all your night."

"Oh, yeah. Mom told me, and we were considering bringing Jess and Luke along, but we thought about it, and they'd already been let out once this week, we figured it was best to keep them at home and not excite them too much."

"Well, that's fair enough. More for us then."

"So, Mom, what's on the menu for tonight? Truffled goose foie gras? Squab again? Or pickled herring?"

"Pot roast."

"Oh, pot- what?"

"Pot roast."

"I'm sorry, I think my ears must be broken or malfunctioning, I didn't quite catch-"

"Tonight we are having pot roast with mashed potatoes and baby carrots, followed by pudding for dessert. Did I say that clearly enough? Would you like me to repeat myself yet again? Find a bullhorn perhaps?"

"I can't believe it! All these years growing up here I dreamed of this, but I never truly thought this day would come."

"Calm down Lorelai, this is just because of how well Rory has done with her exams. Next weeks menu will be back to our usual fashion."

"Ok, now you have to get into college and maybe they'll order pizza. If you get valedictorian we might even be able to eat in the living room. Ooh, with our shoes off!"

"Oh, really now!"

"Come on Mom, if it's for Rory-"

"Finish your drink Mom." Rory instructed, smiling.

"I would have to echo that request." Richard added. Lorelai frowned and reached for her glass.

"How'd the celebration go?" Luke asked as they came in later that night. Lorelai shook her head.

"My mother is-"

"Your mother is a very nice person." Rory interrupted. "My mother on the other hand..."

"What did she force down your throats this time?"

"Pudding!"

"What?"

"Yeah. And for dinner – pot roast with mashed potatoes, baby carrots and those little rolls that Mom loves so much."

"I don't get it."

"You sound just like her. She was doing a nice thing, what is there to get?"

"Emily Gilmore doesn't just do nice things." Luke replied and Lorelai nodded in agreement.

"This is what I was trying to tell her the whole way here."

"So you're saying next week when we walk in there, she'll ask for a kidney or part of a lung?"

"Bone marrow," Luke suggested."

"Because it's more painful, right?"

"Right."

"Let me just pose this thought – she was happy for me and my results and she wanted to do something nice. Doesn't that sound at all within the realms of possibility?"

"Not when you've spent seventeen years with the woman and know the depths of her evil." Lorelai shook her head.

"Ugh, you guys are just ridiculous!" Rory decided, heading behind the counter to go find herself some ice cream.