Chapter 3

Payson's life was beginning to fall into place. Things were aligning, getting neater, and (sometimes) even making sense. About three weeks after their arrival, Payson successfully tracked down both a day care center and a suitable apartment within ten minutes of the Rock. Though she was grateful for her parents' hospitality, she was relieved to finally leave her childhood bedroom. These days it felt more like a mocking museum piece than a living space.

At the Rock, she assisted Sasha with coaching the gymnasts in between the regular National Team practices. Over time she developed just as strong a reputation as Sasha among the gymnasts. Neither coach would accept anything less than your best.

"She's brutal." Jessica Rudolph said, chalking up and glancing across the gym at her new coach. As the number one gymnast at the Rock Jessica's opinion was well known and sought after – at least among most of the female gymnasts. At present a crowd of juniors was encircling her. "Payson made me do my beam routine five times in a row and when I finally caved and asked her what was wrong, do you know what she said?"

"What?" one of them asked curiously.

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

Jessica nodded incredulously. "Nothing was wrong with my routine, she was just testing my consistency for fun. What a waste of my time…"

"You're the most consistent gymnast at the Rock. You haven't messed up in what – how many years?"

Jessica pretended to brush off the flattering comment humbly. "Well, I guess she's new…"

"Ladies! Is this a slumber party?" Sasha Belov's voice boomed from across the gym. The girls scattered like mice. "Get to work – NOW!"

"You haven't lost your touch I see." Payson commented behind him.

"Of course I haven't, but you're the one to talk." He replied to her at a normal volume. "I saw you drilling Jessica on beam this morning. I've never heard anyone say the word 'again' so often in such a short time."

Payson sighed and looked across the gym to the girl in question. "Honestly I was just making out her character as an athlete."

Sasha smirked. "What did you come up with?"

"She's precise to a fault. Each time she performed was exactly the same – right on the head."

"So?"

"So…" Payson said. "Shouldn't it be getting better?"

Sasha turned and looked at his assistant coach. Suddenly she seemed like the sixteen-year-old he met so long ago, staying late every night, coming early every morning, and always trying to improve.

"You're tough, Keeler."

"She can do better, Belov."

"Well let me handle Jessica for now." Sasha said. "I want to you pool all your effort into one task, Payson."

She looked intrigued. "What?"

"Nina's uneven bars."

Payson looked past Sasha's shoulder and saw the younger elite gymnast in question. She was tumbling across the floor with somewhat uncontrolled force.

Sasha continued to explain. "Some people – not me, of course – but some people on the National Committee and at the this gym still doubt your ability to coach these girls. Parents have voiced their skepticism. I want you to prove them wrong. I want to force them to eat their words and beg you to train their daughters."

She had to hand it to him. Sasha Belov had moxy.

"Why Nina?" she asked.

"Because she is one of five children and her parents live almost an hour away. They are less involved and therefore less concerned about your reputation and past. We shouldn't get any overly concerned phone calls about your bad influence on her. Besides, if you can get Nina's uneven bars up to par with Jessica's by the next National Team practice then our star gymnast and her parents will both get highly needed reality checks. All you need to do is -"

But Payson had already left his side. She was half way to Nina Hart. The young girl was stretching alone.

"Ready?" she asked her.

Nina jumped up at the sound of the Olympian's voice. "Ready? For what?"

"You're going to show off a new uneven bars routine at next week's National Team practice."

Nina's eyes bulged. Her tiny body seemed to contract at the very thought of a new routine. "Uneven bars? Are you sure you don't mean beam or floor?"

"Uneven bars." Payson repeated with confidence. She led the reluctant girl to the apparatus and started to go through her routine verbally. When she finished Nina's face had shifted from concern to sheer panic.

"You're nuts." She said motioning toward the bars. "I can't do that stuff. Uneven bars is Jessica's thing. That routine you just described….that has to be at her difficulty level."

"It's higher." Payson said unapologetically. She surveyed the girl before her. So much of Nina reminded her of Emily. Though different types of gymnasts, Payson could see that Nina would have to learn confidence just as Emily had years before. While the right competitive attitude came easily to girls like Jessica, it wasn't programmed into Nina. "I'm not giving you a choice here, Nina. You're going to do this routine. You have amazing skill and power. I've seen you achieve great things on beam and floor. The only reason Jessica can outstrip you on bars and during high pressure competitions is because of her control. The only thing standing between you and doing this routine for me right now is in your mind. Your body is ready, so trust it."

Nina looked at the bars again and took a deep breath. Though she wanted nothing more than to run away, but a small voice reminded her that this was the Payson Keeler – epic gold medalist from 2012. It was hard not to believe her.

Payson squeezed Nina's shoulder encouragingly. "You can do this, Nina. Trust me. I've been more afraid of bars than you. If I can do it there's no reason you can't."

That was the only thing she needed to hear. A minute later the girl was soaring through the air.

Sasha looked across the gym and observed the pair working together. He gave himself a mental pat on the back. He had a feeling that the next National Team practice was going to be very interesting.

"Welcome ladies." Sasha said with more prep than usual. "Isn't it a beautiful day for gymnastics?"

Confused murmurs of agreement rose up through the small crowd. It was the second National Team Practice and Sasha's good mood was almost nerve wrecking. Sasha took a deep breath in, soaking up his surroundings with enthusiasm. Payson, who was standing next to Nina watching this spectacle, had no idea what was going on…

"Did he go crazy?" Nina whispered.

"That's one explanation…" Payson speculated.

"Girls!" Sasha said loudly. "Today is a special day. We have special visitors coming in from the National Committee. Now, they are very excited to see you perform in person again and you should do your best for them. And since they are guests in our gym, we should welcome them. We should be professional. When they walk in, I'll give you a signal and then you will all say " Welcome, Ms. Beals!"

Nina raised her hand. "Who is Ms. Beals?"

"Excellent question! She is a dear friend of mine…"

Payson snorted, but turned it into a cough.

"…and she's been on the National Committee for a very long time now. We go way back…"

All the girls nodded. They were confused, but obedient. None of them except Payson knew the real reason for Sasha's set-up. While they assumed it was about being polite, Payson knew it was really about Sasha mocking his least favorite person in the gymnastics world.

No sooner had Ellen Beals walked in, than Sasha whistled loudly and the girls repeated "Welcome Ms. Beals" in unison like a cliché first grade classroom on the first day of school.

Payson waved the girls off to stretch and headed over to her ex coach. "Smooth, Sasha" she said to him, though she couldn't help but be a little proud of his spunk. Ellen Beals wasn't Payson's favorite person in the world either.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He said unconvincingly with a large smile.

The girls were now starting to showcase their different skills. At present, everyone was watching the national champion, Keera Donaldson, on beam.

"She's…perfect." Payson said in awe, watching the smiling girl perform every challenging component of her routine easily. Her pristine blonde hair and perfect body type made her look like a champion too. When she stuck her landing, her teammates applauded. Keera had just easily performed the highest difficulty level Payson had seen from an American gymnast that year.

"Just about perfect." Sasha said. He nodded to the approving committee members all scribbling frantically on their clipboards. Ellen Beals seemed pleased as well. She walked confidently over to Sasha and Payson.

"Good morning Sasha, Payson." She nodded civilly at them. "Keera is progressing well, don't you think?"

"Absolutely." Sasha agreed.

"Boston Elite sure knows how to produce winners. It's generally thought to be the best gym in the country, especially now that they have Keera's title. Austin Tucker has done an excellent job with her, don't you think?"

"Sure has…" Payson said quietly.

"Too bad he's not coaching the National Team. That's my job, though I'm sure you fought my appointment with every fiber of your being." Sasha said.

Overkill, Belov. Payson thought averting her eyes from the passive aggressive showdown.

Ellen Beals retaliated. 'Well I'd like to see any of your girls from the Rock do as well."

"Ms. Beals, we might be able to deliver on your challenge." Payson jumped in.

"Oh really?"

Payson nodded. "Just one moment."

Payson walked over to Nina who was standing next to the beam, chatting with a teammate. When she saw her coach come over, Nina's smile dropped. She knew what that determined look on Payson's face meant.

"Am I up?" she asked.

Payson nodded. "Now or never, kid." Nina headed to the chalk box to prep.

Nina was a less known member of the National Team. Placing in ninth originally, she was just high enough not to be an underdog and just low enough not to attract a great amount of attention. While all the parents, Committee members, and gymnasts had held their breath during Keera's routine, many were distracted as Nina swung on to the bars.

Up she went, starting with the simplest pieces then, just as Payson told her, threw new skills in the middle of her routine. Heads starting turning.

"What?" Jessica Rudolph's face was turning pink as she watched her younger teammate match her difficulty level then, with her dismount, surpass it.

Shocked applause scattered around the Rock. Nina beamed and ran over to Payson and gave her a huge hug.

"Did Payson Keeler personally train her?"

"Shoot, I need to get some one-on-one time with her."

"Where did that come from..."

"My parents need to let me work with her…"

The girls were whispering phrases like that for the rest of the day. Sasha also smugly noted how the parents in the observation room were practically fogging up the glass after Nina finished. When practice ended parents flocked around Payson, complimenting her and performing damage control. Keera and Jessica's parents were among them.

"Just to let you know." Ellen Beals said to Sasha before she left. "It's not just you. I don't think either of you belong here."

Sasha followed her gaze to Payson, who was now talking to an excited and animated Nina Hart.

"Well we're not going anywhere this time." He answered as he turned on his heel and headed to his office.

"Mommy, you're in such a good mood today!" Ally commented.

She was right. Her mother was radiating.

"Well mommy had a really good day at work yesterday!" Payson said in a sing-song voice.

Payson was wearing a simple black cocktail dress with a blue flowered apron over it. Ally was in a new dress as well – a gift courtesy of their more comfortable income. Payson was celebrating many things at present. First of all, she had established her expertise as a coach at the Rock and on the National Team – something she thought would take months to achieve. She had also invited her parents over for an apartment warming celebration that night. Their place was finally unpacked and decorated to perfection.

"Here sweetie, taste this pasta sauce." Payson bent down with the spoon. Ally tasted it and smacked her lips together in satisfaction.

"Yummy!"

Just then the doorbell rang. Like a bullet, Ally ran to the door to greet her grandparents. Payson heard the door open and laughter enter her apartment. When she turned around see saw one more guest than she was expecting.

"Hello." Sasha Belov said sheepishly.

"Hi."

Mr. and Mrs. Keeler were standing next to him. Payson's mother had a familiar look on her face – one that clearly read, "Be polite or else."

"We found Sasha in the hallway. He was moving his stuff into his new apartment. Isn't that wild?" she asked.

"I insisted he drop what he was doing and join us." Mr. Keeler said.

Ally jumped up and down, tugging on Sasha's pant leg for no reason. She probably thought that her grandparents had brought a new playmate just for her.

"Oh you're moving in this building?" Payson asked, taking off her apron.

He nodded. "Yeah. Though living in a trailer at the Rock was rugged and endearing for a man in this twenties, I find that now it's just…pathetic."

Payson smirked. "Fair enough."

They all sat down for a lovely meal. To her surprise Payson didn't find it hard to carry out her parents silent request. Maybe it was all the time they were spending together, but Payson's resentment toward Sasha was starting to fade. He was easy to work with and when she was at the Rock she tried not to reflect on past drama.

"That was delicious." Sasha said. "Really – I don't remember the last time I had a home cooked meal."

"I taught her everything she knows." Mrs. Keeler said.

Everyone laughed. Ally's laugh turned into a giant yawn. Mr. Keeler scooped up his drowsy granddaughter "Why don't I put her to bed?"

"And I'll do the dishes!" Mrs. Keeler said.

Sasha got up and started collecting plates. "Let me help."

Mrs. Keeler slapped away his hand. "No, you stay here and have a glass of wine with Payson."

He chuckled as her parents left the dining room. "The thought of you drinking a glass of wine…"

"What?" Payson teased. She got up and opened the bottle of red that her parents brought with them. "Still think of me as a teenage athlete? I can drink now, you know."

Sasha cleared his throat. It was hard to think of Payson as a sixteen-year-old anything in a dress like that, but he didn't verbalize this truth. "You were always an adult to be honest."

"My dad jokes that I was born at the age of thirty." Payson said. "Sometimes I think he was right." She handed him a glass and sat down next to him.

"You never were like the other girls." Sasha said unexpectedly.

Payson always wondered about that. Her relationship with Sasha just seemed so…different. She wondered whether this was just a perception she had or simple truth – the result of her different set of values and their similar methods as athletes. Oftentimes, even then, Payson felt like she had more in common with her coach than her peers.

"Sasha, I want to thank you for what you did for me this month. You know, the plan with Nina."

"I should be thank you, really. You brought out the best in her. It was all your doing."

"Thanks anyway." She said, clinking her glass to his.

"So…" Sasha said trying to find a good way to talk about the elephant in the room. "Does that mean you're done being mad at me?"

"Ask me that in about five years." She said shortly. Clearly, their warm and tender moment was over as quickly as it began. Payson grabbed his wine glass away from him.

"Ah, come on…" Sasha said. "You can't still be mad at me for that little thing…"

"Little thing!" she shrieked, her cheeks turning pink. "You abandoned me right before Worlds. Right after building me back up after my injury you just bolt – no warning, no reason at all. That is NOT a little thing."

"Hold on." Sasha said, grabbing her hand. Payson shook him off and crossed her arms. "I didn't leave you." He corrected. "I left the Rock. It wasn't personal."

"It felt personal." Payson mumbled.

'That's a little self-centered, wouldn't you say?" he said.

Payson narrowed her eyes. "Do you really think you're in a position to criticize me?"

"I'm your boss." He reminded her.

Sasha wasn't flinching. Both he and Payson were gold medalist and knew a thing or two about competition. It was like an epic staring match never seen before. Mrs. Keeler even walked in on them then awkwardly ducked out with a plate of cookies. Neither noticed this. Payson crossed her arms, revealing no sign of backing down.

"You just need to trust me again." Sasha said with confidence. "That shouldn't be too hard to achieve. I did it once."

"Yes," Payson said "but this time around I am a less forgiving, more grown up and cynical version of the girl you used to know."

Payson then noticed that, in their frenzy of verbal spat, they had edged very close to each other. Her bare leg was almost touching his and he was leaning forward, towering over her. A smile started to creep up on Sasha Belov's face.

Payson Keeler jumped up suddenly from the couch, smoothing out her black dress in a desperate attempt to do something with her hands.

"You know." She said with agitation. "There is a simple, easy way to put this all behind us and move on."

Sasha got up and walked over to her. "And what's that?"

"You can tell me why you left in the first place."

Sasha's smirk fell quickly.

"I can't."

Payson sighed in defeat and slumped back on the couch. She wanted more than anything to understand why he left; to know what had been so important they he needed to leave the Rock before Worlds. Sasha Belov's mysterious decision had been a questions mark buried in the back of her mind for over six years and she desperately wanted to take it out.

"I'm tired of being mad at you." She finally said, looking up pathetically at her old coach. "Between coaching and Ally I have no energy to be mad at you anymore."

Sasha's didn't really know how to take that statement. Obviously, he would have preferred for Payson to like and trust him again, but at this point he would take whatever slack she gave him.

"Why don't we start with a clean slate – you know, go back to old times?" she proposed.

Before Sasha could answer, her parents walked in and said their goodbyes. They hugged and kissed their daughter and escorted Sasha out. He smiled half-heartedly at Payson as he walked out the door. He wasn't sure if he could give her what she wanted on either count. First of all, he knew for a fact he couldn't tell her the truth about his exit six years ago. Secondly, he didn't know if he could go back to old times like she suggested. That would require him seeing her the way he used to…and Sasha Belov was beginning to realize how impossible that would be.